Small weddings, big weddings, why?

word. i'd rather much read sillyputty's posts because of the logic he places behind every argument. although i don't agree with every opinion he has, his posts are much more respectable than MOST of other posts on NT where members are seeking advice.
 
Originally Posted by yngSIMBA

^^illphillip
I think that's one of the points sillyputy is trying to make. People go will go WAYYY beyond their means for a ceremony that lasts a few hours at most. Why not take that money and go somewhere with your girl, or put it down on a house? I'm not even saying don't get married, don't put yourself in a situation that will you leave you in debt.

Spoiler [+]
Silly makes great points, but you guys just view him as someone who bashes everything for no reason, but every point he made is valid, and he uses logic to back it up, instead of just accepting things the way they are. I respect and agree with silly's view personally I just wish you guys could be more open minded and see his POV, instead of labeling him as the guy who doesn't like religion. 
grin.gif
 
Click to expand...
Debt is just a small part of the equation. That was ONE of my points. But silly goes on his rant about the rings and the diamonds, and it's all a game, and none of it means anything etc.

I bought my girl a rock. Could I have bought her a smaller rock spent that money more wisely? Sure. Could I have not bought those Jordans and done the same? Sure. Money can always be BETTER spent. I don't have any debt. Do you know how many people do? Over clothes, cars etc. Does that make it right? No. Is that their prerogative? Sure is.

Funny because I didn't click your spoiler but it showed up in my response. Logic you say? You think "logic" is concrete? You think it's absolute? It is HIS logic.

You think "logic" applies to all things in life? You think "logic" will apply to every situation you deal with that involves a woman? Good luck with that!

Again, questioning for the sake of questioning with no real perspective is ridiculous. THAT is MY point. Especially if you're saying NOTHING matters. The dude isn't married or engaged. So why is he trolling in here? To spew HIS rhetoric and push HIS agenda. That's not to say I don't agree with some of it in theory. But that's all it is for him. Theory. If you're a fan of it, more power to you.

Now as for silly's spoiler....."called out on it"? I admitted it! You're giving yourself credit for that now? Look how highly you think of yourself. It's 4pm. My work day is pretty much done and I'm taking a break from a long day at work to speak on a topic that I actually have some EXPERIENCE with.

Dog, we've all seen your cut and paste spectaculars. If you think I take this *+%! as seriously as you do, you are even more delusional than I thought. And that's saying something.
 
Originally Posted by ThunderChunk69

illphil and sillyputty arguments are hilarious
Click to expand...
Just a fun spar.

I certainly can't do what Meth did in the Diamonds thread to expose this dude. Now THAT was a roasting.
 
Same boat as the OP. Just got engaged a few days before Christmas. I live in the bay area and my girl goes to school in l.a. She wants to get married as soon as possible, so the plan is for us to do a civil ceremony as soon as I move down to l.a. Then once we're settled we do a small ceremony for everybody else.  The only thing she wants is to get married at her hometown church. She doesn't really care about the reception (She suggested a buffet) and even suggested it should be Laker themed (She knows I'm a Laker fan). You guys need to really talk this out now because if you're struggling on this who knows what else you'll struggle on. Sometimes the issue is not having money, but how you're spending the money you do have.
 
My fiance and I got engaged in December of 2011.  We want to get married in November 2012 in San Francisco (we both live in SD, she lived in SF for 5 years) and there is definitely a divide (or conflict of interest) in how much we want to spend.
I want to give her what she wants (and deserves), but when I see things like $300 per person venues as #1 candidates I start freaking out.
 
300 a head, dang thats a lot of money.

If you don't know the middle name of those getting married
and dont know how they met you cant come to the wedding,
cuts the list real nice.
happy.gif
 
Originally Posted by ToAnotherLevel


We make enough money to support ourselves but I don’t want to spend an excessive amount of money on a wedding ceremony that ultimately benefits the guests - not us.
Click to expand...

Welcome to Adult hood.....................

Anyway the PURPOSE of a big wedding regardless of income is to introduce the families to each other, most of the time the women's family dominates when it comes to Holidays....................

I got a big wedding coming in June, regret every cent I'm spending on it but................

i-aint-even-mad.jpg
 
Originally Posted by Biggie62

Originally Posted by Big J 33

Originally Posted by Grizzlyboy

I got married Feb 2011. PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!

If you do not set the tone of your marriage now, you can forget about it.

Women have no sense of saving, money, long-term. They want it now. It is your job to be the MAN and set boundaries.

I expressed to my wife that she has a budget. That was it. Anything over I canceled. Write the checks yourself and look at receipts.
Click to expand...
laugh.gif
 
What an outrageously ignorant statement.
Click to expand...

I would bet you money that my mom is better at saving, investing, and projecting spending than you ever will be Grizzlyboy.  Sure some women are like that, but just an equal amount of men are the same.
Click to expand...
My fault. I shouldn't have generalized. But if you check the national average, men save better than women. Your mom is probably the exception and I applaud her for it. Please, for goodness sake, stop taking board comments so damn personal.
tongue.gif
 
I haven't been married. But I know for damned sure the most important thing in a marriage is communication and compromise. You guys are a team now and can't be afraid to voice your opinions, concerns and values. If you have a problem with a huge wedding, tell her now so you can smooth things over and find a solution that won't break the bank, but still enable her to have a dream wedding.

Honestly, there are a lot of people taking one side over another and it's pretty ridiculous considering everyone lives a completely differently lifestyle.

the best advice anyone can ever give you on this subject is exactly what I just told you. Talk it out with your finace and make sure you guys are on the same page moving forward about this wedding before it gets out of hand.
 
Damn you guys paid for the accommodations for your guests at a destination wedding?
eek.gif


my cousin had a mini destination wedding and we had to book our rooms individually
laugh.gif
 
Originally Posted by 0cks
Click to expand...
Damb, I cant believe the 300 and Magnum were out when this dropped ( 1:20
roll.gif
)

Aye and Im not putting more than like a stack towards getting married, **$! that. I work too hard for my money to blow it on something like a weddding
 
I've been to several big weddings and only one stands out, I was a groomsmen so it made it a lot more fun the venue was Bryant Park so that made it pretty awesome. Most recently I attended a small wedding in Connecticut and the people made it pretty awesome rather than the venue.
 
The wedding is just for the female. You are just there for the ride and to help pay for it my friend. Congrats tho wheres the invite
 
I've dreamt of a big wedding since I was little and I'd still love to have one someday. But I know my family nor his has that kind of money. So I'll definitely be having a smaller one. I'll be a budget bride.
 
If I had the money, I'd do a destination wedding with just me, the future wife, our mothers, our sibling(s), and a couple close friends/relatives. Then have a big reception for the rest of the family and friends to enjoy.

Realistically: We'll probably have a small wedding and a good reception. I really don't want a huge wedding because I only want people that I'm really close with to celebrate the occasion with me and the wife.
 
Originally Posted by blakep267

ehh, I mean let her do what she wants ( not saying spend a million dollars), but if she wants a big wedding let her have it. At the end of it all, money doesnt mean anything. All we have are memories. When you guys are 80 years old, do you think that having that extra money you didnt use on the wedding would be useful, or being able to remember this awesome day where you and your girl got hitched and partied hard.
Click to expand...


I like how you think. Money comes and goes. But just stay within your means. Don't try to have a Kardashian wedding when you only make 30k a year.
 
Just plan slowly, we were engaged for 2 straight years before actually getting married, she's a girl...is expecte of her to dream of a lavish wedding, this is a huge milestone in a woman's life (the wedding part) for us men is more about making her happy and committing....ya just got engaged, let that sink in and she will come back to earth and then begin planning. Set a budget, DIY details are awesome, Etsy.com is your friend, Hillary at me if you need a photographer, interview DJs look for independent DJs and make sure they speak the language of the music they will play....the most expensive part will be the venue, shop around for restaurants that offer wedding receptions, stay away from dining halls, they are cheesy and expensive....whatever your budget is, prepare to go over by a few thousands, my wedding budget was 10k at the end of the day I spent about 14k, I had a great time. Like someone else mentioned on here a destination wedding >>>>>> if I could go back in time I would have done it this way....you eliminate the people that don't matter without feeling any guilt and have a great time with a small group that matters, plus it's far more economical, you just wot have as much control as you'd like.

And please, don't listen to dudes on here who most likely never even touched the topic of marriage with a female, listen to those of us who have gone through it....if your budget doesn't allow anything else, there is nothing wrong with a civil weddin and a small dinner for the fam, but if you can actually save up the money, don't sell yourself short, it's supposed to be a once in a lifetime experience....live it up the best you can.

Once again...where ate you located??...maybe I can help you with te photography.
 
We continued our wedding planing this evening and I think we're in a good place. No more than 100 guests and we may have a deal on a venue via my mother's associate. We'll contine to work together on this. I want her to be happy w/ what we do. I appreciate the input.
 
Originally Posted by ToAnotherLevel

We continued our wedding planing this evening and I think we're in a good place. No more than 100 guests and we may have a deal on a venue via my mother's associate. We'll contine to work together on this. I want her to be happy w/ what we do. I appreciate the input.
Click to expand...


Best of luck bro and congrats, seriously talk to her about doing a destination wedding, you won't regret it.And don't let these Foreveralone dudes rain on your parade, you don't have to blow 100k + on a wedding for it to be great, it's all about attention to detail, I've photographed a few weddings that were VeRY expensive and I was not impressed, by the same toll I've photographed budget weddings that were simply amazing.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

The ultimate sneaker enthusiast community.

NikeTalk was created as a way of giving back to both the sneaker enthusiast community and to the greater global community of which we are all a part.

NikeTalk is NOT affiliated with Nike Inc. in any way, shape, or form. All opinions expressed herein do not necessarily reflect those of Nike, Inc.

© 1999-2024 NikeTalk.com

Share this page

Back
Top Bottom