Tipping etiquette when you're being treated

panaricanretro · Aug 9, 2012

Wow, huge thread derail. Won't even touch the whole "Should you tip" it's been argued at length.

As for the topic at hand, it would be poor manners towards the people who are paying for your dinner to add money in to the tip or suggest that they didn't tip enough. It also depends on where you are. Some countries, they just don't tip. It was tough for me in Ireland to not leave a tip after every meal but the most they do there is maybe round the bill up by one or two euro and that's it, like if it comes to $38.99, you'd leave $40 and that was it.

You can always try to slip some extra money to your server, like after you get up from the table, and everybody's near the front, just say "Actually, can you wait a second, I have to go to the bathroom..." and then try to catch your server on the way and just hand him the tip. But you should never let your host see you doing that, it comes across as ungrateful.

jesusshuttlesworth34 · Aug 9, 2012

Yeah having your hosts see you throw some extra money at a server is like you saying "Thanks for dinner but you guys are still too cheap to compensate the server so let me take care of that for you."

Find a discreet way to leave the waiter some extra cash if you choose too. You don't want your hosts feeling sleighted or offended.

ricerocket1 · Aug 9, 2012

server here for almost 5 years now. heres a good rule of thumb. tip me if i gave you a good service. heck i tip everyone in the tipping industry (food and beverage/hospitality). if you are not tipping though don't be harassing your server for extra stuff and expect a red carpet service because we do remember those who don't tip.

the hater boxden · Aug 9, 2012

Do my tipping friends tell your non tipping friends that they should leave tips? :nerd:

It gets damn annoying, and I find it rude, that they don't tip, ever, especially when it's a spot you guys regular.

fraij da 5 11 · Aug 9, 2012

sumrndmdude said:
fraij da 5 11 said:

People go to school for a lot of things... Not everyone is tipped. Why barbers and not servers? You're buying the Barbers service for X amount that they set themselves... Say its $20, then (per social norms) you determine that the barber deserves more than that or not and tip him however much that is.

Why doesn't the barber just set his price to the Maximum amount he feels he can charge?

Click to expand...

this is the hypocrisy of servers and restaurants...if you don't pay a tip no one is arresting you, just some salty waiters looking at you funny afterwards.

What's your point? If you don't pay your barber you will get in trouble but if you don't tip your waiter its all gravy cause they cant do anything about it?

sumrndmdude · Aug 9, 2012

you don't have to tip the barber just as you don't have to tip the server. You are saying that the barber should set a fixed price and factor tipping into the price, datznasty is saying that he would not mind if you factored the 'tips' into menu prices. I just find it offensive that people are looked down on for something that's ultimately a judgement call.

gregzzy23 · Aug 9, 2012

the hater boxden said:
Do my tipping friends tell your non tipping friends that they should leave tips?

It gets damn annoying, and I find it rude, that they don't tip, ever, especially when it's a spot you guys regular.

I try, but some people, I dont know what it is, I guess they're cheap or weren't brought up right. How do you not want to leave at least $1 dollar on a $40 dollar bill? Its ridiculous. Part of the reason I stopped ******g with certain people.

fraij da 5 11 · Aug 9, 2012

sumrndmdude said:
you don't have to tip the barber just as you don't have to tip the server. You are saying that the barber should set a fixed price and factor tipping into the price, datznasty is saying that he would not mind if you factored the 'tips' into menu prices. I just find it offensive that people are looked down on for something that's ultimately a judgement call.

Like I said, TRY keeping the doors on your restaurant open when you're prices on the Menu reflect a 20% increase. It WILL NOT work in this country.

The 2 different industries were compared because the clearly most vocal person on NT against tipping waiters tips his barber 43%.

I find it offensive that you think its acceptable to not follow social norms when it comes to tipping your server when the system in place makes them rely on that very "judgement call" to be able to survive in that job. And I dont wanna hear that "find another job" junk either, that's not up for discussion.

Let's say EVERY restaurant in the country increased their food prices by 20%. Would you just not go out to eat at all anymore? You'd be spending the same amount of money on a meal as if you tipped 20%, only the difference would be that the person waiting on you doesn't have to do jack **** to earn that 20%.

I have no issue with giving someone less than 20% for mediocre service.

jesusshuttlesworth34 · Aug 9, 2012

sumrndmdude said:
you don't have to tip the barber just as you don't have to tip the server. You are saying that the barber should set a fixed price and factor tipping into the price, datznasty is saying that he would not mind if you factored the 'tips' into menu prices. I just find it offensive that people are looked down on for something that's ultimately a judgement call.

Judgement call?

There a plethora of things you learn and do while growing up.....they are social norms and implied throughout.

Do you sit down during the National Anthem at a ball game and yak it up throughout the song? Or do you stand up?

Do you stand in line while you wait before purchasing something? Or do you just go to the front and cut everyone?

The list can go on and on and on....

And yes I definitely call out the cheap friends in the circle....I'll just pick up the tab if we are in a group too, it's always funny watching cheap people cringe when they fill out their receipt and are struggling with the notion of forking over a few extra dollars to someone else. :lol:

Those are the same people you invite to a cookout or a gathering and show up empty handed?

But wait.....that's a judgement call to right? Yes it is....a very poor one and it shows you lack class.

sumrndmdude · Aug 9, 2012

And that's my point. That it is a flawed system, inequitable and random as hell...I'll pay a tip, but I am not obligated to. And as has been said before, this tipping thing is an entirely american construct! My gripe is with people who get salty if no tip is left...what if the person who came in for the meal is having the worst day ever and just needed a good meal but was short on funds. Why should such a person be held to an arbitrary implied and unenforceable 'social contract'?

jesusshuttlesworth34 · Aug 9, 2012

sumrndmdude said:
And that's my point. That it is a flawed system, inequitable and random as hell...I'll pay a tip, but I am not obligated to. And as has been said before, this tipping thing is an entirely american construct! My gripe is with people who get salty if no tip is left...what if the person who came in for the meal is having the worst day ever and just needed a good meal but was short on funds. Why should such a person be held to an arbitrary implied and unenforceable 'social contract'?

My sister lives in Paris and when I have visited there.....they tip. In Barcelona.....we tipped.

But if the tipping factor in America is that much of an issue for you.....you are FREE to go move wherever you like. No one is forcing you to stay here.

rawex5 · Aug 9, 2012

What's your PayPal, op? I want to tip you for making another tipping thread.

datznasty · Aug 9, 2012

You don't have to do jack **** to get it now already since there is such a sense of entitlement and autograts. And again, 43% of $7 is $3. Not a big deal would be an understatement. I would assume servers would then have the same motivation to perform their job well as everyone else, perhaps moreso, since it is an infinitely replaceable skillset. And your 20% increase hypothetical is a bit disengenous. You just need 6$ an hr more to bring up to minimum wage. If one table got $60 worth of food and were all "low class, ghetto, cheap" people and only tipped you 10%, that's your 8.13 an hr now. Presumably you handle more than 1 table in an hr, therefore if every table is surcharged 20% it far surpasses bringing your wage to minimum many times over. Of course, owners will still do it and sell that its about paying the employees, but itd just create better profit margins for them.

Maybe you should talk to allday about how all the so called nice, upscale spots that he frequents survive. Chilis is a big deal to me

Cmon Jesus, angry servers are also FREE to get other jobs. "Don't be mad, U.P.S is hirin."

the hater boxden · Aug 9, 2012

gregzzy23 said:
the hater boxden said:

Do my tipping friends tell your non tipping friends that they should leave tips?

It gets damn annoying, and I find it rude, that they don't tip, ever, especially when it's a spot you guys regular.

Click to expand...

I try, but some people, I dont know what it is, I guess they're cheap or weren't brought up right.

How do you not want to leave at least $1 dollar on a $40 dollar bill? Its ridiculous. Part of the reason I stopped ******g with certain people.

I think it's a combination of both, mostly the last part. I have friends who aren't in the best financial situations so to speak but still leave a tip.
I told one of my boys like "we come here often, you should at least leave like 2-3 dollars, it won't hurt", etc. I don't know man, it stumps me, dude has the money too :rolleyes

.

Gotta finding new dine in food friends :smh:

Jordan8 · Aug 9, 2012

I rather tip the cooks 10% +

I see you guys have been guilt tripped into thinking you haved to tip someone for doing a job they chose.

Do yall tip the drink carrier at buffets too?

sumrndmdude · Aug 9, 2012

JesusShuttlesworth34 said:
My sister lives in Paris and when I have visited there.....they tip. In Barcelona.....we tipped.
But if the tipping factor in America is that much of an issue for you.....you are FREE to go move wherever you like. No one is forcing you to stay here.

This is my issue

, the venom and personal offense at missing a tip. The thing is I do tip, regardless of service...I even tip at my local Vietnamese carry out spot. I tip hotel concierge and cleaning room ladies. My issue is with people taking offense at someone who misses a tip (whether that person does it out of ignorance, political stance, or because they just don't care). One of the definitions of gratuity is 'something given without claim or obligation'.

And to the guy talking about the flag and lining up in a queue, those are manners...and manners are 'free'. So is class, hurling insults and threats is as classless as they come, just reason and try to enlighten people instead of calling the classless or cheap that type of rhetoric gets yo nowhere.

the hater boxden · Aug 9, 2012

cartune said:
I rather tip the cooks 10% +

I see you guys have been guilt tripped into thinking you haved to tip someone for doing a job they chose.

Do yall tip the drink carrier at buffets too?

At many places the tips are split among the staff.

big j 33 · Aug 9, 2012

Tipping threads on Nike Talk are always the same..

In regards to the actual topic, it's rude to those who paid if you make it known their tip isn't enough. Either offer to take care of it or leave it under your plate or wait until they get up and don't notice. Otherwise you're basically saying thanks for the meal, but you're too cheap for a proper tip.

dirtylicious · Aug 9, 2012

cartune said:
Do yall tip the drink carrier at buffets too?

yes

da r entertainment · Aug 9, 2012

Oh YoU MaD said:
bandman said:

NationalTruckerDave said:

I wouldn't tip regardless.. Why should I pay someone for doing their job?

Click to expand...

You don't tip waiters/delivery drivers?

Click to expand...

I don't tip people to bring my food out. Do you guys tip the guy at footlocker to bring out your shoes?

The people who do deserve tips in my opinion are the UPS/Fedex/USPS delivery guys on those days where it is incredibly hot/cold or pouring rain and they don't accept tips, although I do give them a cold water when they come to my door and deliver a package.

dwalk31 · Aug 9, 2012

lol I definitely tip. I always thought it was a given. If you are being treated it may be tricky. Typically you can feel out the situation to see if you offering to leave a tip makes sense. Basically better to leave one or offer than not...especially for first impressions.

fraij da 5 11 · Aug 9, 2012

cartune said:
I rather tip the cooks 10% +

I see you guys have been guilt tripped into thinking you haved to tip someone for doing a job they chose.

Do yall tip the drink carrier at buffets too?

See this is the dumbest way to look at the situation. Yes, they chose the job. But you are NOT being guilt tripped into tipping anyone... That is just how it is. Waiting tables at some places is actually really competitive, I'd be willing to bet that if you go anywhere nicer than a ruby tuesdays right now and tried to get a job as a waiter, they'd say sorry, no thanks.

People do it because there IS money in it, no thanks to people like you.

But noooo you wanna go tip the line cooks, you know they chose to do that job right? You know that they knew signing up that there wouldn't be tips, right? You know that its no harder to be a line cook than it is to be a server who actually gives a ****, right?

sumrndmdude · Aug 9, 2012

fraij da 5 11 said:
See this is the dumbest way to look at the situation. Yes, they chose the job. But you are NOT being guilt tripped into tipping anyone... That is just how it is. Waiting tables at some places is actually really competitive, I'd be willing to bet that if you go anywhere nicer than a ruby tuesdays right now and tried to get a job as a waiter, they'd say sorry, no thanks.

People do it because there IS money in it, no thanks to people like you.

But noooo you wanna go tip the line cooks, you know they chose to do that job right? You know that they knew signing up that there wouldn't be tips, right? You know that its no harder to be a line cook than it is to be a server who actually gives a ****, right?

wow...dudes really feel a way about getting tips?

betweenthebars · Aug 9, 2012

DatZNasty said:
I am a pretty substantial deviation away from "poor," but thanks for playing. You'll get me next time.

@ substantial deviation. Right.

Either way, refusing to tip shows a pretty clear lack of class and respect, regardless of how poor you are.

fraij da 5 11 · Aug 9, 2012

sumrndmdude said:
fraij da 5 11 said:

See this is the dumbest way to look at the situation. Yes, they chose the job. But you are NOT being guilt tripped into tipping anyone... That is just how it is. Waiting tables at some places is actually really competitive, I'd be willing to bet that if you go anywhere nicer than a ruby tuesdays right now and tried to get a job as a waiter, they'd say sorry, no thanks.

People do it because there IS money in it, no thanks to people like you.

But noooo you wanna go tip the line cooks, you know they chose to do that job right? You know that they knew signing up that there wouldn't be tips, right? You know that its no harder to be a line cook than it is to be a server who actually gives a ****, right?

Click to expand...

wow...dudes really feel a way about getting tips?

I hope you actually have experience in this at least since you're speaking up.

As I mentioned before, I've spent more time cooking than I ever did serving, and that is still my stance. I haven't had a job where tips were a part of the gig since 2006 either. I'm definitely not a "salty waiter" like you're labeling people in this thread who actually understand what a "social norm" is.

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Tipping etiquette when you're being treated

panaricanretro

jesusshuttlesworth34

ricerocket1

the hater boxden

fraij da 5 11

sumrndmdude

gregzzy23

fraij da 5 11

jesusshuttlesworth34

sumrndmdude

jesusshuttlesworth34

rawex5

datznasty

the hater boxden

Jordan8

sumrndmdude

the hater boxden

big j 33

dirtylicious

da r entertainment

dwalk31

fraij da 5 11

sumrndmdude

betweenthebars

fraij da 5 11

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