Cubicle Life : VOL: OFFICE SPACE (DRAMA, BEEF, STORIES, TALES, et. al) - Share your work life

people like to converse in the bathroom at my job...im like naw, just naw

i know the code for the bathroom on a lower floor or if im really wanting some peace and quiet, ill head to the hotel a block over...
 
Went into the office bathroom and some co worker guy was in the stall snapping pics :rofl:

I don't even want to know...
 
Walked into the bathroom to use the urinal

There was a dude in there with his pants and boxers all the way down to his ankles. Peeing like a little kid. :smh:

Dawg aint nobody wanna see your cheeks fam cmon this is a professional environment.
 
I use to work in the same area as this contract that had 0 bathroom etiquette. There are two urinals with a divider in between them in the bathroom. Dude would use one hand to do stuff on his cell which is fine I guess, but he would then rest his other arm on the divider so his elbows are invading the person next to him personal space. If I stand up to pee and I see him enter the bathroom I'll wait. 
 
NazDrowie said:
 
people like to converse in the bathroom at my job...im like naw, just naw

i know the code for the bathroom on a lower floor or if im really wanting some peace and quiet, ill head to the hotel a block over...
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I've had dude try to have full eye contact convos mid stream.

No thanks.
 
Meangene45 said:
 
HarlemToTheBronx said:
I've had dude try to have full eye contact convos mid stream.

No thanks.
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I wouldn't be talking just looking at your meat.
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Just looking? 
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I use to never like pooping at work. Always thought it was weird and gross. Then one day it dawned on me that pooping at work was tantamount to getting paid to sit on the toilet and poop.

I now look forward to every pooping opportunity that I can get at work.





...
 
jbpkickz said:
Disgusting how many dudes don't put toilet paper on the seat , they just sit bare bottom with no care in the world, poop then don't even wash their hands then back to work
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Dude did this yesterday while i was already seated. Left n i was like :x .. i knew exactly who it was by his shoes too


spizike231 said:
I use no paper cover on the seat when I go.

I wipe it down or make sure there's nothing on there but I'm not one to worry about it.

There's more germs on the door handles and in the air than is on the seat, man.
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Meh ... we have a can of lysol disinfectant on the sink. I grab it spray the seat, put it back wash the hands then go bout my business wash hands before i go.

9 times out of 10 all these dudes here at my job get up from the seat lookin like they havenr washed there as in a few days ... hair, dirt, sweat, occasionally sh** on the seat. Now how the hell does that happen, at that point i dont even go just hold it.

I usually just try n be first one after cleaning lady is done. Its 3 diff bathrooms on my floor. Like clockwork


NazDrowie said:
people like to converse in the bathroom at my job...im like naw, just naw

i know the code for the bathroom on a lower floor or if im really wanting some peace and quiet, ill head to the hotel a block over...
Click to expand...

They hold convos here too all the time .. like full on convos bout anything. Theyll be done using it and still just sitting in there talking. One manager tried to converse with me, i kept it short answered 2 questions and bounced. If im at the urinal im not even speaking
 
SuperAntigen said:
I use to never like pooping at work. Always thought it was weird and gross. Then one day it dawned on me that pooping at work was tantamount to getting paid to sit on the toilet and poop.

I now look forward to every pooping opportunity that I can get at work.





...
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Preach! My method requires at least 2 a day, sometimes I just chill on the toilet until my legs fall asleep.
 
my new office doesnt have the typical stalls.  Each ****ter is like its own little room with floor to ceiling walls and a door.  The walls are thick enough that you cant hear anything unless you have someone being loud.  I cant go back to the old school stalls, im not a savage.
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NazDrowie said:
so i think a coworker of mine has narcolepsy...out of my peripheral vision, i can see his head droop every few mins and he recovers a min later...
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Dont work in an office, but saw a hgher up atmy job literally doze off, wake up and repeat for a legit half hour :lol:
 
I was in the middle stall at work taking a deuce, minding my own business when someone entered the stall to my left. Paid them no mind until they started conversation. I ignored him but he kept talking about how "tense" bathrooms are and out of nowhere "Africa" by Toto starts playing.

For those who dont know, this is the song I'm referring to:



At first, I thought that he accidentally played a song on his phone. It has happened to me before but no this guy started talking about how music helps him relax, etc.

People came in and out of the bathroom to use the urinals and all you heard was Africa at full blast.

Song came to an end and he mentions "let's see what else I have on this phone"....he ends up playing some Dave Matthews Band song.

He finally finishes pooping, flushes the toilet............and walks right the **** out of bathroom
 
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Born illa said:
Been in some dope office environments in the past 5 years. Beautiful women, familly atmosphere, good times. But i've also been on the other spectrum where i've had to deal with some of the laziest individuals and cutthroat managers. Had one serious office relationship with a joint that ended pretty badly... also had another coworker I was involved with pass away suddenly. Still, the individuals and circumstances i've encountered have been memorable.
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You gonna have to give some detail on this.

TimidTebow said:
This lady who is my cubicle neighbor keeps farting and her stomach is growling. She needs to go to the bathroom and handle business. She doesn't like using our bathrooms at work so I'll prob have to listen to her farts and stomach growling all day. Our company provided breakfast today and we had banging breakfast burritos. I dropped my load earlier and I feel better but this lady has to suffer all day because she doesn't use public bathrooms.
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You know this for a fact? Like she talks about not using public restrooms? If she is farting at her desk do you smell it too? :x

jbpkickz said:
Disgusting how many dudes don't put toilet paper on the seat , they just sit bare bottom with no care in the world, poop then don't even wash their hands then back to work
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That is disgusting, especially when I've seen piss all over them seats and doo doo residue :smh:. When I go at work I never use the bathroom on my floor. I go to the top floors where the higher pay grades work. Mainly b/c I don't l want to see dudes I work with in the restroom trying to talk to me, I don't want them in my biz when I'm on the throne either. Also they keep those restrooms cleaner, never any piss on the floor or the seats. For the life of me I don't understand how dudes miss at a urnial :smh:. Not talking about droplets from shaking, I mean wet floor all around the urinal. Makes no sense.

As for me, I always to my prep before I go. I get paper towels wet and put soap on it, wipe the seats off with it. Get more PT, wet it and wipe again, then dry. Then I put toilet paper down on the seats double folded with the inside portion face up. You won't believe how many times dudes come in and just plop right down on the seat. I know they didn't put any tissue down, b/c the dispenser makes noise when you getting the tissue. Then when time comes to wipe, they are done in like 10 seconds. I don't about yall, but I'm wiping for a good while. I don't see how they can just do two wipes and be done.


spizike231 said:
Walked into the bathroom to use the urinal

There was a dude in there with his pants and boxers all the way down to his ankles. Peeing like a little kid. :smh:

Dawg aint nobody wanna see your cheeks fam cmon this is a professional environment.
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Was he mentally delayed? Not being funny, but I remember two guys in my church did that. One was a teenager same age as me at the time. The other was a grown man. They always dropped trou at the urinal.


Cards93 said:
my new office doesnt have the typical stalls.  Each ****ter is like its own little room with floor to ceiling walls and a door.  The walls are thick enough that you cant hear anything unless you have someone being loud.  I cant go back to the old school stalls, im not a savage.:rofl:
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I would love to experience that level of privacy. I hate when I go in the stall when the bathroom is empty, and someone comes and sits in the one right next to me. Then I have to listen to fart, and the bubble guts :smh:. I need that space man.

HarlemToTheBronx said:
I've had dude try to have full eye contact convos mid stream.

I don't understand this at all.

No thanks.
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This is why I hate going to the bathroom on my floor. I don't want to have convos when I'm trying to take care of businees, whether it is 1 or 2.
The state building I work in is soooo old, from at least the 60s. The bathrooms look so dated, and I don't know what the hell went on back then. None of the urinals have a divider, they are just lined up 4 on the wall with about 6inches of space in between them out in the open. So even if we follow the rules of one space between us, we are still exposed. The only restroom with a divider is the public one on the lobby level. It isn't really a divider, just the construction of the building. There is a pillar and a urinal on each side of it.
 
Forgot about this thread...but to add on the the restroom convo. Our office has 2 closed off restrooms in the lobby that is my go to. And I invested in some poopourri..that stuff works lmao. Best thing about using those is that the cleaning crew cleans them every 2 hrs and the entrance is next to our area so whenever I see them leaving after cleaning..I go.. :smokin
 
Getting involved with a girl at work is never a good idea, famb.

I know from experience as well.. :smh:
 
spizike231 said:
Getting involved with a girl at work is never a good idea, famb.

I know from experience as well.. :smh:
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This, I got one now that I can pursue if I wanted too, but no. I have a GF so it's easy, but don't do it is my advice.
 
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spizike231 said:
Getting involved with a girl at work is never a good idea, famb.

I know from experience as well.. :smh:
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Me and this married chick had mojitos for lunch yesterday. Sits in the cubicle next to me. Get back to the office. She's buzzed. Starts kissing and biting my neck and putting her hand down my shirt to feel the chest. Tempting but not gonna move forward with it.
 
Damn. Thinking you might've gotten a married woman pregnant is a stressful situation. Good thing her husband didn't go after you like he said he would. You never know who is crazy.
 
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