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I'm sorry bro, I know it's just words on a screen but...you're story gave me a boner. Repped.
Crazy stories from your job.
- Thread in 'General' Thread starter Started by atlien seeko,
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thadocta
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i can confirm.
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Not mad at u but i like freaks... Just get a hazmat suit and let the games begin lol
Thierry Henry
formerly louislagerfeld
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I worked at mcdonalds whe I was like 16, and 1 saturday night me and the other guys who worked the lien were really bored. if anybody has ever worked at mcdonalds, they know that we use like cartridge guns for mayo, special sauce etc. So out of nowhere, a guy just shoots another person in the face with the tartar sauce gun. Then the guy who got sauced, grabs the other guys hat and throws it into the fryer. A massive food fight ensues, were shooting each other like crazy, and somebody fills a breakfast container up with tons of mayo, special sauce, tartar and comes and smacks me in the face with it extra hard. I fall over and start laughing, then the manager comes in and everybody just stops. He looks at me and I have tons of white stuff on my face :x, and the kitchen is filthy. And he just says, go home. Im like sure. I hated the job as did all the other employees. So getting sent home early was a blessing. Anyway, I took my usually 24 piece nuggets and left
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One day while working at a shoe store I met this older broad 36-38yrs old w kids and got her number. We start texting and within a couple of days she wants to meet up at my job during lunch. I get into her car and tells me how I'm so young and how she shouldn't be even meeting me on the first place. I knew this broad hadn't had any D in a while so words exchange we start kissing and starts rubbing me down at the pants. She unzips my zipper and takes out the D. She goes on and says how fat and big it is and starts to fap me off. So we end up talking and we arrange to meet up after work as I'm already late. So hours go by and after work she picks me up in her van. She drives off and parks on quite street when we go to the back of the van and get our smash on. She was so tight I could feel my junk tearing it upfunny thing is her van is rocking back and fourth and 30min go by and we see that a car parks right behind her van. So we stop and put our clothes back on and we drive off. Btw this is the same chick my boss was trying to get at but had no game. He wanted proof so I showed him the pictures
Dat humble brag.
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RustyShackleford
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This is another repost from the "grimmiest things ever done to you thread", didn't really happen at the job but it involved someone from work:
Frist job out of high school was at a retail store, I was 18. There was a damn sexy cashier that work there who I was crazy about, she was 24, and had 2 kids. We started chillin, but never did anything, I tried though. She would always say she wanted to take things slow. Me being anxious to smash was me showing my age/immaturity and was a turn off. On Saturday afternoons after work I would always drive her home. Even though I been inside her place other times she never let me come inside on Saturdays because he said her kids where home and did not want to bring another man around before she knew it was something serious. I didn't care cause that explanation made sense in my young mind. She claimed to live with just a roommate and her 2 kids. Baby's father is a bum and out the picture, she claims to be single.
If I didn't drop her home, or at her other job, her homegirl used to pick her up from work. She tells me that's her roommate. So one night I drop her off and she tells me her roommate needs a ride to her cause the car is in the shop. I say cool no problem. And she says her roommate is watching the kids and would need time to change so it might take a while for her to come out. Still I say cool no problem.
So I'm in the car waiting for her roommate to come out. My head is down reading a book. when I hear the car door open. I look up at sitting there is the biggest, blackest, most Anthony Mason looking dude I have ever seen. And homegirl is outside the car looking freshly smashed. They kiss goodbye and I'm like
>: . Then she smiles and waves to me and says something like "Bye, thanks, your the greatest "brother" a girl could ask for" 
. So now I gotta give drive this gangsta looking Terry Crews to work, which is 30 mins out the way. While we're talking in the car I find out that's the kid's dad and homegirl told dude I was gay. 
Homeboy tells me he would never of guessed it cause I give off a "real !+@!+" vibe, but he been locked before so he knows how it is. I wanted to blow up her spot but I was scared out my mind of dude. So I never took my eyes off the road and made small talk the entire ride home. Didn't even tell dude I wasn't gay
-I got one more wild job story, lemme know if you guys wanna hear it. Kinda long, it's about a 65 chick nearly raping me
Frist job out of high school was at a retail store, I was 18. There was a damn sexy cashier that work there who I was crazy about, she was 24, and had 2 kids. We started chillin, but never did anything, I tried though. She would always say she wanted to take things slow. Me being anxious to smash was me showing my age/immaturity and was a turn off. On Saturday afternoons after work I would always drive her home. Even though I been inside her place other times she never let me come inside on Saturdays because he said her kids where home and did not want to bring another man around before she knew it was something serious. I didn't care cause that explanation made sense in my young mind. She claimed to live with just a roommate and her 2 kids. Baby's father is a bum and out the picture, she claims to be single.
If I didn't drop her home, or at her other job, her homegirl used to pick her up from work. She tells me that's her roommate. So one night I drop her off and she tells me her roommate needs a ride to her cause the car is in the shop. I say cool no problem. And she says her roommate is watching the kids and would need time to change so it might take a while for her to come out. Still I say cool no problem.
So I'm in the car waiting for her roommate to come out. My head is down reading a book. when I hear the car door open. I look up at sitting there is the biggest, blackest, most Anthony Mason looking dude I have ever seen. And homegirl is outside the car looking freshly smashed. They kiss goodbye and I'm like
>: . Then she smiles and waves to me and says something like "Bye, thanks, your the greatest "brother" a girl could ask for" . So now I gotta give drive this gangsta looking Terry Crews to work, which is 30 mins out the way. While we're talking in the car I find out that's the kid's dad and homegirl told dude I was gay. Homeboy tells me he would never of guessed it cause I give off a "real !+@!+" vibe, but he been locked before so he knows how it is. I wanted to blow up her spot but I was scared out my mind of dude. So I never took my eyes off the road and made small talk the entire ride home. Didn't even tell dude I wasn't gay-I got one more wild job story, lemme know if you guys wanna hear it. Kinda long, it's about a 65 chick nearly raping me
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Thread is hilarious. Had a chick drop off a friend who overdosed on heroin. Her friend was high as a kite too...and dipped because she didn't want to get caught either....dumb *** left her name and number in case we needed to contact her about her friend.
I think i remember this. Please tell it again
I think i remember this. Please tell it again
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^kinda similiar experience
i was in college and worked at a printing company. had this middle aged woman who was in town from phoenix for business. she needed thousands of brochures and other stuff printed out for her company and needed it delivered to her hotel room at the sf westin for oracle open conf. we get to chatting and she tells me she's not use to the cold foggy sf weather and was not dressed for the weather. she had on a skirt and a tank top. i was saying she looked good and needed not to worry and i thought it was very appropriate
so she pays for it and i see her pic on the credit card and id and made a compliment about her pic and age just to mess around and she smiled and said i was a charmer
so the next day, i give her a call to tell her that her stuff is ready and that i would personally deliver it to her room. so she greets me with a hug (i'm thinking ok?) and thanked me. she opened the box to check her stuff and said everything was great. i complimented on her outfit and that she looked very professional in her business attire. asked me if i could stay for a few minutes (i thought she was gonna grab her wallet and give me a tip for the delivery) and say sure and i take a seat and she comes back starts rubbing me through my pants and hands me a condom (do most hotels provide condoms?)
proceeded to smash and chatted a little while and asked me if im ever in glendale/phoenix that i should give her a call. i said something like, "i will NEVER forget this day"
i was in college and worked at a printing company. had this middle aged woman who was in town from phoenix for business. she needed thousands of brochures and other stuff printed out for her company and needed it delivered to her hotel room at the sf westin for oracle open conf. we get to chatting and she tells me she's not use to the cold foggy sf weather and was not dressed for the weather. she had on a skirt and a tank top. i was saying she looked good and needed not to worry and i thought it was very appropriate
so she pays for it and i see her pic on the credit card and id and made a compliment about her pic and age just to mess around and she smiled and said i was a charmer so the next day, i give her a call to tell her that her stuff is ready and that i would personally deliver it to her room. so she greets me with a hug (i'm thinking ok?) and thanked me. she opened the box to check her stuff and said everything was great. i complimented on her outfit and that she looked very professional in her business attire. asked me if i could stay for a few minutes (i thought she was gonna grab her wallet and give me a tip for the delivery) and say sure and i take a seat and she comes back starts rubbing me through my pants and hands me a condom (do most hotels provide condoms?)
proceeded to smash and chatted a little while and asked me if im ever in glendale/phoenix that i should give her a call. i said something like, "i will NEVER forget this day"
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This is another repost from the "grimmiest things ever done to you thread", didn't really happen at the job but it involved someone from work:
Frist job out of high school was at a retail store, I was 18. There was a damn sexy cashier that work there who I was crazy about, she was 24, and had 2 kids. We started chillin, but never did anything, I tried though. She would always say she wanted to take things slow. Me being anxious to smash was me showing my age/immaturity and was a turn off. On Saturday afternoons after work I would always drive her home. Even though I been inside her place other times she never let me come inside on Saturdays because he said her kids where home and did not want to bring another man around before she knew it was something serious. I didn't care cause that explanation made sense in my young mind. She claimed to live with just a roommate and her 2 kids. Baby's father is a bum and out the picture, she claims to be single.
If I didn't drop her home, or at her other job, her homegirl used to pick her up from work. She tells me that's her roommate. So one night I drop her off and she tells me her roommate needs a ride to her cause the car is in the shop. I say cool no problem. And she says her roommate is watching the kids and would need time to change so it might take a while for her to come out. Still I say cool no problem.
So I'm in the car waiting for her roommate to come out. My head is down reading a book. when I hear the car door open. I look up at sitting there is the biggest, blackest, most Anthony Mason looking dude I have ever seen. And homegirl is outside the car looking freshly smashed. They kiss goodbye and I'm like
-I got one more wild job story, lemme know if you guys wanna hear it. Kinda long, it's about a 65 chick nearly raping me
View media item 143796
meek meals
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No Fap November got ****** wildin.
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I read that story in the other thread and it still cracks me up that you just let dude believe u were gay, she played u so dirty
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a friend of a friend smashed on a plane, wifed it up for a few months. he was on her blog, so it was true
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Please provide blog. PM if necessary. This lotion is about to dry up on my shaft. Hurry.
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too much info broham...
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this was like 2004-2005
he's obviously an idiot and got played out.. but she flew him out for sessions on the reg.
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Will have to come back to read everything when I have the time.
This thread is golden
This thread is golden
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aint that the truth, have you feeling like a king and ****.
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aint that the truth, have you feeling like a king and ****.
was just checking her twitter and she was fapping dude sitting next to her and posted pics
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Seen that. I also saw that she takes all her clients raw. I value life to much no thank youwas just checking her twitter and she was fapping dude sitting next to her and posted pics
meek meals
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Please don't let this thread die.
meek meals
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