Last Time You Crapped Yourself? Vol.Mudbutt - Page 6

Mines a pissing story. 

In pre-school, it was recess time. I told my teacher I had to go to the bathroom and she told me to wait until recess was over. Well at that age, you don't wait to go potty. You just do it. So I went over to the fence by myself, started crying and started to let it flow. Teacher runs over and starts carrying me to the bathroom. All the while, I'm pissing on her chest. 

Fast forward a week later, it was recess time again. I had to go again so I tell the same teacher and she told me to hold it. She wanted to teach me a lesson. Bish didn't learn from the last time. So I went over to my spot. I saw the green grass turning yellow because of the last time. I started crying again and just pissed myself. My mom had to come in to take me home because the teachers had enough. Man she was pissed.

 @ this thread

Quote:

Originally Posted by DoS 

The last time was vicious.
I was in DC visiting some family. My pops decided that it would be a good idea to head over to this lobster shack 20 minutes away from the crib. We are taking this drive in rush hour traffic mind you. So during the drive to the shack I'm taking a nap, and when finally we get to the restaurant I order some of the best lobster I've ever had in my life. I'm eating it up. I'm feeling the spices and getting that butter in the mix. Finally I finish eating and I feel my stomach bothering me. This is normal for me, and I have no idea why restaurant food hurts my stomach, but it does. I decide to drop a duece before we leave. I do the deed, and I'm feeling confident that I'll make it back.
I get in the car. My dad is driving, my grandma is in the passenger seat, and I'm in the backseat sitting next to my sister and my friend. I was feeling kind of tight. My sister and I get into an argument, and then all of a sudden my stomach starts hurting again. I start panicing. B.M.F comes on the radio, and every Lex Luger bass drop is getting to me. I start screaming at my dad to drive faster. I'm pushing my sister to give me more room. I'm screaming at everyone in the car. Eventually my dad is going to fast that my grandma starts to panic and tells him to slow down. I TELL HIM NO. DON'T SLOW DOWN. I start feeling myself, and I start rapping with Rick Ross. Every "HUH" he says I say with him. Every time he says he's big meech, I say I'm Larry Hoover. The AC was on, and I was sweating too hard. At this point everyone is crying of laughter except my grandma because she is terrified. My Dad mocks me by looking back in the rearview mirror and crying of laughter. I couldn't believe it. We pull up like 2 blocks from the house and it was over. I tell them that it's too late. It's over. I let out the hugest sighs of my life. I had to sit in my **** for 2 blocks, and the walk over to the door you best believe I had my cheeks clenched. That shower was too degrading.

As I read this, I imagined dude chilling in the back seat of the car sweating bullets and rocking back and forth. He's thinking to himself, I really have to take a dump but I'll sing BMF just to pass the time. 

Quote:

Originally Posted by chris82790 

This thread delivers

Indeed, most would say at the wrong time too.

my girl told me this story the other day..thought id share.

when my girl was 6 or so she was playing at a friends house down the street from her house

she was too busy playing to stop and take a poop and especially at her friends house..

she starts heading home and cant hold it any longer, she had been holding it long enough already..

she poops herself and is terrified to go home...her favorite pink overalls are now ruined and she knows her mom is gonna whoop that behind when she gets home..

she steps inside and thinks she in the clear...then her mom comes from another room and catches a glimpse of this big brown lumpy stain on her butt..

she lost it and her first reaction was to spank her and when she did that, a bunch of it came out of the sides and ran down her leg..

i was at my pops complex and decided to go out for a jog , about two blocks from his complex theres a beautiful neighborhood

and with amazing scenery and million dollar homes etc , i had eaten philly steak hot pockets and chocolate milk for breakfast

and went to the convenient store by his complex to grab some microwavable jamaican patties...this was a storm brewing.

up until that day i had been eating relatively well , i was turning a new pagewith my eating habbits  but my dad only keeps junk food in his house

and jamaican patties where the only thing edible in that convenient store....i feel real crappy about myself so i tell myself im gonna go

out for a jog , it is after all a nice neighborhood.....it was a monday that i believe was a holiday ,couldnt tell you for sure which.....i start

jogging and i get cramp around my bladder , i have to stop because the pain is too much , at this point i have to weigh out my options

im about a mile away from the convenient store/apartment , and about 3  blocks away from a park ....i tell myself imma gonna rough it out

and start heading towards the park to get to the public bathroom , the pain because to much so i see this house....BEAUTIFUL HOME with

huge trees and no cars i get behind one of the trees and unload about half the clip all over a lawn gnome .....it looked like it had been dipped 

in chocolate fondue bruh......next thing u know a car pulls up but doesnt notice , but i wasnt sure so i just fled the scene knowing i had bought

a few minutes with that little predump .....i cramp up again 20 feet before i get to the restroom and i just drop to my knees in real tears , i  man

up and just run towards the bathroom only to realize that its a holiday and public park bathrooms are closed -____- i see a elementary school

infront of the park and realized theres nobody in school , might aswell  jump the fence and take a doo doo by the portables , i jump the fence

but didnt make it as far as i thought i would , sweat dripping down my body,tears running down my face i cramp up again and squat by a classroom

and just explosive diarrhea EVERYWHERE , it was a bloody mess yall ...i was wearing my favorite shorts so i glance at the door of the classroom

and see classwork taped to the door...papers that read "when i grow up i wanna be" i grabbed one and just started wiping , when i was done i just glanced

and all i saw was "my name is sammy when i grow up i wanna be a basketball player so i can take care of my brothers and my family" with a massacre of

doo doo all over it , smh yall