Mature Members Only Please, Lowest Point in my life**update pg4

she could live with that dude she was screwing. funny all she cares about is a place to stay what about youre feelings.
that was my first response... i told that ***** that the same night... well after 24 hours she finally spoke with our son. basically kept it one to two word answers and didnt ask him any questions. either was trying to hold back tears or completely disconnected. her friend she is supposibly at said that she cried after the phone call but i dont really care... i've been crying non stop when i told my son that his mother doesn't live here anymore and that he wont see her in the house, he acts like he understands but i knew he didn't... I didn't go into detail but he was asking about her... 5 mins later i told him to finish his cookies and he said he was saving them for me and mommy...this ***** broke my heart
 
that was my first response... i told that ***** that the same night... well after 24 hours she finally spoke with our son. basically kept it one to two word answers and didnt ask him any questions. either was trying to hold back tears or completely disconnected. her friend she is supposibly at said that she cried after the phone call but i dont really care... i've been crying non stop when i told my son that his mother doesn't live here anymore and that he wont see her in the house, he acts like he understands but i knew he didn't... I didn't go into detail but he was asking about her... 5 mins later i told him to finish his cookies and he said he was saving them for me and mommy...this ***** broke my heart
Damn......:smh::x
 
keep a cool head op.

try to keep everything normal around your son. traumatic experiences tend to leave a lasting impression (talking from experience)
 
that was my first response... i told that ***** that the same night... well after 24 hours she finally spoke with our son. basically kept it one to two word answers and didnt ask him any questions. either was trying to hold back tears or completely disconnected. her friend she is supposibly at said that she cried after the phone call but i dont really care... i've been crying non stop when i told my son that his mother doesn't live here anymore and that he wont see her in the house, he acts like he understands but i knew he didn't... I didn't go into detail but he was asking about her... 5 mins later i told him to finish his cookies and he said he was saving them for me and mommy...this ***** broke my heart


tear jerker right there. keep your head up homie. everytime you make moves you gotta think for you and your son. goodluck.
 
that was my first response... i told that ***** that the same night... well after 24 hours she finally spoke with our son. basically kept it one to two word answers and didnt ask him any questions. either was trying to hold back tears or completely disconnected. her friend she is supposibly at said that she cried after the phone call but i dont really care... i've been crying non stop when i told my son that his mother doesn't live here anymore and that he wont see her in the house, he acts like he understands but i knew he didn't... I didn't go into detail but he was asking about her... 5 mins later i told him to finish his cookies and he said he was saving them for me and mommy...this ***** broke my heart
she proably going to use her son to record anything you do bad, that way she could steal him from you. and then you going to be paying child suppourt, i bet she going to use that money on her nails and clothes for herself. if youre a dead beat you better clean up youre act. i dont know you so.... buy em mad icecream toys and js. or treat him right a movie even watch a semease street specaial cause shes going to use her son to win this one. listen shes going to use her son to get you back and youre gonna take her. shes preying on your feelings. you better be touch son. FORD TOugh. you got any female cousins if so chill with them tell them your problem hopefully they think logically if not i fee for you. You should ask youre son what mommy said( but only God knows if he run and tells his mom that you ask him what yall talking about) maybe next time u should listen on the other line on put the phone on speaker. IF SHE GOT A  FACE BOOK MAKE A FAKE ACCOUNT WITH A DUDE ON THERE AND TRY TO HIT ON HER AND SEE IF SHE TAKES THE BAIT
 
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So sorry to hear this OP. The way she didn't deny it, It sounds like she well knew what she was doing and she well knew the consequences and prepared herself for that. As messed up as it sounds I've heard of women doing this because they want to start a new life, be single again and not have to care for a child.
Do what you have to to keep your son. Get help from your fam they will be there for you. Stay in school, work and when the time is right the right one will just pop into your life like nothing. As a single father you will be a chick magnet, bro.
 
Keep your head up and have faith that it will be better, the pain is only temporary you will heal. Your main responsibility is being the best father you can be to that little boy. Can't understand how a person could be so selfish specially with a kid involved. Just take all the negative thoughts out of your head, all they will do is bring you down. She pretty much did you a favor, she has the guilt to bear when your son gets older and starts asking questions.
 
she proably going to use her son to record anything you do bad, that way she could steal him from you. and then you going to be paying child suppourt, i bet she going to use that money on her nails and clothes for herself. if youre a dead beat you better clean up youre act. i dont know you so.... buy em mad icecream toys and js. or treat him right a movie even watch a semease street specaial cause shes going to use her son to win this one. listen shes going to use her son to get you back and youre gonna take her. shes preying on your feelings. you better be touch son. FORD TOugh. you got any female cousins if so chill with them tell them your problem hopefully they think logically if not i fee for you. You should ask youre son what mommy said( but only God knows if he run and tells his mom that you ask him what yall talking about) maybe next time u should listen on the other line on put the phone on speaker. IF SHE GOT A  FACE BOOK MAKE A FAKE ACCOUNT WITH A DUDE ON THERE AND TRY TO HIT ON HER AND SEE IF SHE TAKES THE BAIT
Don't listen to this fool
 
Damn op, I'm really sorry how all that went down. It left a hella feels in my gut. Keep your head up though, because you have to fight hard for your son. Don't let this girl get to your head though, she took the L. It takes awhile but you get over it, and it will go on.

My condolences
 
Sorry to hear about this.

All I know is that you need to put your kid first and give him all the love and attention you can.
 
she proably going to use her son to record anything you do bad, that way she could steal him from you. and then you going to be paying child suppourt, i bet she going to use that money on her nails and clothes for herself. if youre a dead beat you better clean up youre act. i dont know you so.... buy em mad icecream toys and js. or treat him right a movie even watch a semease street specaial cause shes going to use her son to win this one. listen shes going to use her son to get you back and youre gonna take her. shes preying on your feelings. you better be touch son. FORD TOugh. you got any female cousins if so chill with them tell them your problem hopefully they think logically if not i fee for you. You should ask youre son what mommy said( but only God knows if he run and tells his mom that you ask him what yall talking about) maybe next time u should listen on the other line on put the phone on speaker. IF SHE GOT A  FACE BOOK MAKE A FAKE ACCOUNT WITH A DUDE ON THERE AND TRY TO HIT ON HER AND SEE IF SHE TAKES THE BAIT
:x :x

you buggin.

that was my first response... i told that ***** that the same night... well after 24 hours she finally spoke with our son. basically kept it one to two word answers and didnt ask him any questions. either was trying to hold back tears or completely disconnected. her friend she is supposibly at said that she cried after the phone call but i dont really care... i've been crying non stop when i told my son that his mother doesn't live here anymore and that he wont see her in the house, he acts like he understands but i knew he didn't... I didn't go into detail but he was asking about her... 5 mins later i told him to finish his cookies and he said he was saving them for me and mommy...this ***** broke my heart
:smh: :smh:

damb, son... thats tough..
 
I appreciate all the good things said. I really just don't want to lose my child to her. She trying to play the victim telling me she doesn't have a place to stay. Yet the ***** talking like she is on the come up like I care. I am going to see a lawyer and double down I don't wish this on anyone. I will survive and I will try to keep it civil but ill be damned if I don't get my son whether it be now a year from now or whenever.
Honestly, whatever you do, don't go soft on her.  Don't let her crash at your place or give her some money to help her out.  She really didn't even try to explain herself to you, she knew what was up and didn't care.  Believe me, judges don't like taking custody away from moms, so you're gonna have an uphill battle.  Make sure you save the texts or whatever and, if possible, have her friends say that she neglected her son.  Also, deny any allegations of smoking or drinking around your kid, even if it's true.  If you want custody, you'll have to make her look pretty bad, trust me my brother is trying to get custody of his kids, but the judge doesn't want the kids to be away from their mom, so it's tough.  Don't let any dudes tell you to swallow your pride for your family, she'll do the same **** again when things go bad.  Good luck dude...
 
Sorry to hear about your situation, fam. But you handled everything the way that I think it should've been handled.
I hope all is well and that you're able to keep your son. Keep your head up, and keep on being the good parent.
 
Firstly, I'm sorry you had to go through that...Sounds excruciating.



Secondly, OP, sounds like you got your head on straight, props for that.

Glad you know your kid is your life, keep ya head up.
 
:smh: Seeing **** like this makes me so mad. I mean I know there are females out there that aren't like this, but it seems like you can't trust damn near all of them.

I really hope you get custody of your son and that everything else works out for you. You don't deserve any of this. She'll get what's coming to her.

Keep up.
 
my condolences, stay strong fam

having said that, do you actually know for sure that she was cheating, like actual hard evidence???

also i must ask, going on 8 years, did you have any intentions of marrying her?  and by intentions, i mean actually letting her know?
 
Sorry to hear that man, can't help that she was so triflin but it's not fair to you and the kid. Stay up and best wishes to you and your child's future.
 
my condolences, stay strong fam

having said that, do you actually know for sure that she was cheating, like actual hard evidence???

also i must ask, going on 8 years, did you have any intentions of marrying her?  and by intentions, i mean actually letting her know?

i been telling her we were going to married later this year, waiting on her to set a date and show initiative. She made some comments like 2 months back like oh this dress looks nice and sent me a pic of it and i told her i'm ready lets set the date and save... Originally when we met i told her i didnt plan on getting married for atleast 5 years.. i proposed to her in 4 and only reason we havent was because finances, kept putting it off then i told her like 6 months ago that finances may never be right lets just do it.

The proof is in what i wrote her actions, lack of caring, wouldn't even explain herself and all she said was "i didn't **** him"... Look for those that may not know most females like to acquire the next guy before they make the move. She's been acting shady like always on her facebook on her phone, calling out of work lying and telling me she is off, or would go out with this guy while i think she is at work... she told her friends i am the source of all her problems and she is unhappy... and she finally told me earlier today that she was unhappy and should have handled it different.

every word from here on out is a lie from her, i just want to have my paperwork right and make these moves to gain custody rightfully so.
 
When did you notice the relationship going bad? You said you ignored the times she didn't want to be bothered or do anything. I know work, school, and the child take up the majority of your time but did you 2 make time for each other? For a woman to walk out on a 8 year relationship and child she has to be mentally somewhere else.
?
 
As I read your post I filled with rage...

Man what a position. You got it going OP, women don't think rationally sometimes. The day will come when she thinks back at the mistake she's made. From the post it seems that you provided what was needed and she just decided to follow her woman logic.

Stay strong and keep your head straight. This will make you a better man and you should take it as a learning experience. The girl had everything and she just threw it away. As humans we sometimes have a little self destructive characteristic that sometimes takes over an individual, lack of self control or lack of immaturity. You have to realize that this woman was no good for you in the long run.

the bird had people to look out for her... not including you and she still decided it wasn't enough. Keep on living man. Always do things for yourself and your son!

man **** that *****
 
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yes. I would make time but i could always feel that there should be more. Do i believe me working nights play a factor in it as well yes... But i think the biggest issue was communication. The relationship felt at times like i was dealing with 2 diffferent people. One time she would be happy and down for what ever then the next day its like **** everything but let me complain i am bored yet when i mention what we could do then she would shoot it down. Also i have gotten the feeling that some times when i was off she would be just mad at the world yet at other times she would be ride of die for me.

I really felt like it was 2 different people. I would take her out to eat, we would cook, i would pay for her to see her fam 4 hours away yet i can honestly say it never felt like enough. I'm not saying that this is on one single entitiy but this situation could have been avoided and made easier with communication which i swear i would talk with her about that like every 3 months. She acts more like a child and i am more like a work first play later type of guy. I would push her to get paperwork done for our son, and to take care of responsibilities that she doesn't seem to have any motivation for. I helped her get her ged and i was helping her pass college. Literally i would teach her the material, help her with homework, and just about carry her over the finish line in all responsible venues of life. At times she would be on point and on top of it and then at others she would just say f it or not do it.

i'm in the mist of this right now so maybe other things will hit me in the future, but anytime i seen any issue i would try to resolve it and make her happy, i was happy when she was happy, yea guess that was simp but thats what brings me joy, putting a smile on the ones i love...
 
This is terrible. It's unfortunate when people can't be upfront about how they feel. It saves lot's of time and embarrassment. Even worse that she would disrespect her own offspring like that. I hope you get to keep your son. Life shouldn't be like this.
 
yes. I would make time but i could always feel that there should be more. Do i believe me working nights play a factor in it as well yes... But i think the biggest issue was communication. The relationship felt at times like i was dealing with 2 diffferent people. One time she would be happy and down for what ever then the next day its like **** everything but let me complain i am bored yet when i mention what we could do then she would shoot it down. Also i have gotten the feeling that some times when i was off she would be just mad at the world yet at other times she would be ride of die for me.

I really felt like it was 2 different people. I would take her out to eat, we would cook, i would pay for her to see her fam 4 hours away yet i can honestly say it never felt like enough. I'm not saying that this is on one single entitiy but this situation could have been avoided and made easier with communication which i swear i would talk with her about that like every 3 months. She acts more like a child and i am more like a work first play later type of guy. I would push her to get paperwork done for our son, and to take care of responsibilities that she doesn't seem to have any motivation for. I helped her get her ged and i was helping her pass college. Literally i would teach her the material, help her with homework, and just about carry her over the finish line in all responsible venues of life. At times she would be on point and on top of it and then at others she would just say f it or not do it.

i'm in the mist of this right now so maybe other things will hit me in the future, but anytime i seen any issue i would try to resolve it and make her happy, i was happy when she was happy, yea guess that was simp but thats what brings me joy, putting a smile on the ones i love...

how old are you? It just sounds like the relationship has reached the end, which happens with young couples who have been together for a long time. Its just a shame you guys have a kid together, that makes it tougher
 
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