Women and Men can't be friends? vol. why not NT?

weekz

weekz

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So I was passing through the If She....then leave her thread and I noticed one of the

most common responses was "has a lot of male friends or a male best friend or doesn't hang out with females" type thing. Since I've been at college

my main crew has been half females. There is no feeling of attraction at all between us, no robin and ted type stuff word to HIMYM. We all treat each

other like brother and sister.

Just wanted to know why NT is so against the concept.
 
Weekz said:
So I was passing through the If She....then leave her thread and I noticed one of the

most common responses was "has a lot of male friends or a male best friend or doesn't hang out with females" type thing. Since I've been at college

my main crew has been half females. There is no feeling of attraction at all between us, no robin and ted type stuff word to HIMYM. We all treat each

other like brother and sister.

Just wanted to know why NT is so against the concept.
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Here's how i feel about my female friends and colleagues. I don't have any feelings towards any of them, and don't look at my female friends as them in the sense of being cute, attractive, or "effable"... however, if any of them were to ask me to get down with them for a couple nights, i'm all in it.
 
It's not so much that guys don't trust the girls, it's the fact that these guys CAN'T be trusted. Not all of them, but a majority of them

If a girl has too many guy friends that's a red flag. The more guys she's cool with, the more guys gonna try and get @ her. They don't care whether she's in a relationship or not

But at the end of the day it's your girl. If she's a good girl she should already know how to handle these types of situations. They're almost like blessings in disguise
 
Only way this could be...Works for me in this case:

1. Ugly/Fat/Gay

2. Friends or Family member ex

3. Co-Worker

Maybe a friend of the family/childhood friend

Outside of that, no because eventually "platonic" friends can catch feelings (whether they say it or not)...
 
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I have many female friends that I'm not trying to smash, but would smash, if you get what I'm trying to say.

I think that's the difference.
 
tumblr_mgkw0wYtru1s3prpoo1_500.gif



:smh:

never trust them
 
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For the most part guys dont want to be friends with women.
Unless she is tomboyish men dont find women fun to be around.



Associates yes
Friends No
 
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ccastro02 said:
damn, you guys some insecure dudes.
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That's what I'm starting to think. I'd never worry if I had a gf who had dude friends because I've been around women who can just be friends with guys.
And if she is indeed sneakin around well then i'd just take notes on what i did wrong and then on to the next one.

I also have this mental thing that just makes me shut down any possible feelings of attraction when I label a female as "famb."
 
I've always thought this saying was dumb. I've had girls tell me this after one of their friendships/relationships get screwed and I'm like "so we're not friends then?" :smh:

It depends on the person but of course women and men can be friends. Some guys can't stand female company if they're not hitting on them. They are different from men so it makes sense. At the same time, females need female attention sometimes. But honestly, if you can't be good friends with a girl, I think you probably have some issues. Some deep woman hate or insecurity or something weird.
 
Fantastic4our said:
I have many female friends that I'm not trying to smash, but would smash, if you get what I'm trying to say.

I think that's the difference.
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Basically. We're grown and can control ourselves. It goes down when the opportunity presents itself and they know that. It wouldnt be genuine to act like she ain't bad if she's bad. But we respect each other and each others relationships.
 
WhatCanISay said:
It's just how these things are my friend.

I would hate for you to have to find out the hard way. I'm not saying it applies to every single female with alot of guy friends, but it does apply to most.

That's like seeing a straight dude who only hangs out with gay friends , and brushing it off as normal.
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I used to be like that with my ex's, always getting all jealous when they were out with male friends, and always questioning them. That jealousy ish only ruins relationships and creates unnecessary stress.

You just have to learn how to deal with the fact that your girl has her own life and her own friends just as you have yours. Surely there are limits, like ex's and shady people (criminals, drug dealers drug attics, and alcoholics). Other than that she can hang with who ever the hell she wants. We're not married and we don't pretend to be.
 
WhatCanISay said:
Agreed. Jealousy can ruin a relationship, or make it a really horrible experience.

OP said if they "have no female friends" and "alot of guy friends". That is pretty much a red flag IMO. Sure you can have guy friends, but ALL guy friends? Hmmm I don't think I'm willing to take that risk. The Bad outweighs the Good by way too much.
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Even if my girl had mostly all male friends i still wouldn't really care. As long as they're good people and watch out for her, i'm kool with it.

Being in a relationship with a girl who has mostly male friends is definitely not for the faint or weak hearted. It takes a lot of confidence, self awareness, and maturity to come to terms with that. I agree if you can't handle it, than steer away from her, because your insecurities will definitely get the best of you.
 
ccastro02 said:
Even if my girl had mostly all male friends i still wouldn't really care. As long as they're good people and watch out for her, i'm kool with it.

Being in a relationship with a girl who has mostly male friends is definitely not for the faint or weak hearted. It takes a lot of confidence, self awareness, and maturity to come to terms with that. I agree if you can't handle it, than steer away from her, because your insecurities will definitely get the best of you.
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Costco,

So you are cool with you being in a relationship with a woman and her going on 1-on-1 outings with one of her "male friends." ?
 
ccastro02 said:
She can hang with who ever the hell she wants. We're not married and we don't pretend to be.
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Ok so it isn't the hanging out that is the issue. It is the fact that she is JUST your girl that is the issue. Meaning if she was your wife, would you "allow" your girl to hang out 1-0n-1 with her male friends?
 
Out of all the women I know I have two that I consider friends. I've known them for years and wouldn't have sex with either of them. The rest are just females I know, they aren't friends to me. People throw that friend tag around way too frivolously.
 
DCAllAmerican said:
Costco,

So you are cool with you being in a relationship with a woman and her going on 1-on-1 outings with one of her "male friends." ?
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:lol: at costco

And yes, i wouldn't care. Like i said, limits are ex's and shady people, and maybe new people in her life. But if it's childhood friends, family friends, or school/work friends i could care less.

Obviously there are rules. Respect yourself, respect me, and respect the "relationship". That's all.
 
ccastro02 said:
:lol: at costco

And yes, i wouldn't care. Like i said, limits are ex's and shady people, and maybe new people in her life. But if it's childhood friends, family friends, or school/work friends i could care less.

Obviously there are rules. Respect yourself, respect me, and respect the "relationship". That's all.
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Ok I see you are lowering the guards.

Hypothetical:

Your woman starts to get cool with a co-worker (new person). She tells you that he and her go to lunch together.

He isn't shady (as if you would even know that).

You are fine with that?

You wouldn't assume dude is trying to pushup?

But even if it bothered you, would you even speak up?
 
I ain't trying to smash, but I will smash


That only applies to about 3 female associates


Other than that I got home girls who I'd never smash or attempt to
 
I've experienced a past gf where 2 out of her 3 best friends were male. Trust me, do not get involved with a girl like that. I'm confident and I was better than them in every way but it still bothered me. In my opinion, a girl also should be deaded if "me and my ex broke up, but were best friends now." wtfff no way. I don't care if my girlfriend has a few male acquaintances who are co-workers, or her friends' boyfriends where she talks to them FROM TIME TO TIME, but if shes constantly in communication with a man or various men I would let her know it bothers me, if she keeps it up, dead her.
 
Weekz said:
So I was passing through the If She....then leave her thread and I noticed one of the

most common responses was "has a lot of male friends or a male best friend or doesn't hang out with females" type thing. Since I've been at college

my main crew has been half females. There is no feeling of attraction at all between us, no robin and ted type stuff word to HIMYM. We all treat each

other like brother and sister.

Just wanted to know why NT is so against the concept.
Click to expand...
are you bisexual by any chance?
 
DCAllAmerican said:
Ok so it isn't the hanging out that is the issue. It is the fact that she is JUST your girl that is the issue. Meaning if she was your wife, would you "allow" your girl to hang out 1-0n-1 with her male friends?
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lol now that's different. Intensity of relationship changes with marriage. Not sure how to answer that.
 
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