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I've said this before, but it's almost to the point of being cultural in the DMV area.
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Women in general eat it up. I understand what you're saying but their agenda is to make money they could care less what people take from it.
I posted it was because I found the idea funny/disgusting and as an example that there's different types of single mothers...one chick got knocked up by a "friend" she was banging the other was trying to have a child for years...got pregnant and her boyfriend left. Other issues aside those 2 shouldn't be held in the same light imo.
shoelyesses
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of course they do...and many dudes as well because they can relate to it ie..... more then likely this was their moms. Couple that with the way the court system is set up...compensation without repurcussions. Dudes keep saying oh i date women with kids etc..baby mammas cause i relate to them better, well unless you been in a situation as such, or grew up in an environment as such how can you relate?
Like i said before there isnt anything wrong with dating a single mom, but the thing is, dudes nowadays are either conciously/subconciously seeking single moms....and then they try to justify it with such b.s. like oh well it takes a real man, only a mature man can do this...Nah brah its only a man who doesnt have high confidence in oneself, up in age and at a point in life where the options of a good single woman who isnt some other guys baby daddies, or just a victim of generational curses and seeking out a woman like his mom.
It kinda reminds me of a older man working somewhere like mckie dees, is it admiral and a honest days work....sure. But no one feels accomplished being middle aged working at mckie dees, and it isnt anyones first choice as far as long term careers....but if your options are limited and its your only viable choice you take it and be appreciative of what you got. But a dude with a plethra of options and can work anywhere doesnt voluntary work at mckie dees. It isnt his first choice. And he certainly wouldnt work there, on some oh i couldve had a more respectable, higher paying job. But i choose mckie dees, and it takes a real man, a strong man, to turn down all the great jobs/careers, with great benefits and good pay. Nah the truth would be, you didnt have those options and you took the best that was available to you that you could get.
And thats similiar to how dating a women with kid(s) is. No emotional stable man is going to have a women he loves, is good for him etc... and say nah imma forgo that and take my chances on finding a baby mamma.
guccjermaine
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If you really love the woman, then you should be prepared to be a good father figure in her child's life. If you're just trying to get in the mothers pants, wait until the child is sleep or not around.
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some kids are friendly duke...grow up.
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This is the damn truth and I know this from first hand experience unfortunately . They want the kid for the perceived love that they'll get from their fam because they now that's the only worthwhile thing that they'll accomplish. But don't think in the long run that after the baby shower, baby daddy bounce, and the kid gets older and needs real care ( day care , doctor, school) they're in for a rude awakening . A single mother can be some miserable creatures . Jesus shuttleworth no doubt we are generalizing in here because this is a general board but like people have said everybody has a different story or reason for being single moms and there are some decent girls out there that got done dirty or are widowed , divorced . But everybody is gonna dress their story up to make it sound like they had no part in being in their situation
shoelyesses
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exactly...what woman says oh i was loose, had sex with random guys...or i was young dumb didnt really know the guy, our relationship was on the rocks and i thought having a kid would make things better.... Or i had a kid to try to keep him. Or especially the young ones...we talked and we decided that it was time and we was ready to start a family... I dont know which is more stupid...Girls who keep saying this and convincing themselves these things to be true, or the dumb **** dudes that actually buy this and believe it.
And to your other point, we are in a society now that ppl praise and commend and applaud single mothers...the more kids/more dads the better. Its gotten to a point where they are commended more then a woman who meets a guy, have kids and is married/long term relationship with the same man. We as a society have made the baby mamma moniker, some sort of prideful daunting amazing accomplishment. You got more ppl celebrating being baby mammas to guys, then chicks being a college graduate. esp...in the black community. Its like oh you got a b.s work a good job...etc thats cool, but it aint nothing compared to me having 2 kids by the age of 20 getting a ged, going to community college and working two low paying part time jobs, and doing it all by myself (often times by choice, rather then the guy simply not wanting to care/support kids).
Our society shows more love, well encourages/promotes for the 25 y/o chick with 3 kids with two baby daddies, on the bus dropping her youngest off at daycare on the way to her cna classes, then the single non baby mamma, who is headed to graduate school. Sad but true.
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yeah i kinda agree with you on the society glamorizing single moms. From basketball wives , to that pregnant and dating , and teen mom those baby mommas need hero's to look at
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Because I am a real *** dude who isn't selfish and focused on me and WAIT FOR IT.....I was raised by a SINGLE MOTHER who worked three jobs and dated one dude in the last 24 years. No dates....no nothing like that.
She put three kids first and held it down....so now I do the same. I know what's it like being the child of a Single Mother/Woman.
You guys let these dumb shows portray Single Mothers as ****/sluts....not every woman with a child is a *****. Is your Mother one?
Think differently guys.
I'm also 27 years old, confident, secure, dedicated, determined and I put others first.....just ask half of NT.
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props for you and your moms for doing what she had to do and you seeing beyond that kid to be with some one at the time. My perspective is diffrent since i was raised by a mother and father who were married a year before they had me ( and are still married 30 years later) i know for a fact that if i knocked up a chick instincts and my upbringing would have me put a ring on it for better or worse . i have a few cousins that are baby mommas on my mothers side and they are some of the most miserable , jealous, ish talking women i have ever been associated with in my life. Like i said i can only speak from my experience and while people hate to generalize and realize their are different factors on why the situation is what it is the bottom line is a single woman with no kid vs a single women with a kid/kids, the no kid women will always be more desirable to the majority of the men in the world.
shoelyesses
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well there you go...and you proved my point...you relate to the single mother plight, because you are a byproduct of it. And with that you also have a miskewed and bias view of a single mother due to the fact your mom was one. You can accept that/deny that w.e. but it will still remain true. You dont have an objective view...you cannot have an outside looking in insight on the situation when your living inside of the bubble.
And how is it selfish, or a guy isnt a real man because he wants to marry/grow and develop a relationship with one woman...as oppose to taking on the responsibilities of someone else?
So i guess your saying because i decided to meet a girl, develop and grow together and raise our child together, im somehow selfish and isnt a real as you....lol.
And no one said every woman who has kids is a j.o., loose, etc.... but you and others be it bias...because your moms was a single mom, be it for w.e. myriad of reasons are brushing it under the rug, ignoring, and being dismissive of the fact that a majority are.
The fact that you have to self promote yourself almost in a holier then thou light shows, apparently there is some sort of issue with it. I mean only a hurt dog hollers. If a young guy in the early stages of his life who is trying to grow mature etc... decides he wants to take a woman who is at the same place he is at, life journeys together, how does that make him any less of a man, as oppose to a guy, who takes a girl who made ill advised decisions, wrong choices and now trying to move forward from them, and you accepting that and in a sense trying to meet/catch up to where she is in her journey in life?
Thats borderline of saying it takes more of a man to adopt and raise a kid, then it does a man to have and raise his own kid...which is simply foolish. Again there isnt anything wrong with dating hell even long term/marrying a woman with kids if she is a suitable mate. But it doesnt somehow makes you more of a man or better then the guy who chooses a woman, a single woman has kids with her and stays with her.
And i dont know your personal situation or relationship with a single mom, but many of times like i stated be it, due to not being able to find a suitable mate that is single with no kids, the generational curse, the damsel in distress aka trying to be the kinda guy i wish my mom would have met while being a single mom etc... and subconciously fill that role by going out and being with a single mom. You ended up with a single mom. Many of single guys dont have the aforementioned issues etc.. and if they find themselves in a position especially if there in the early stages of life and just trying to get to know themselves and figure out who and what they are....it would be selfish and inconsiderate to try to take on the responsibility of trying to not only be in a stable long term relationship, but to take on to some degree a father figure role for a child not your own.
Just because unlike the mother, he made/makes a concious good decision, and accept he isnt in the position to fullfiil this role, and isnt prepared for it, doesnt make him selfish. So just because the mother didnt take into account all these factors and assess the situation, and he does, doesnt make him selfish, less of a man etc.. It means he understand that he isnt in the postion to fully be responsible and isnt at a point to care guide etc... his own life let alone the life of another human being. And if anything that shows he isnt selfish, is a real man and shows a level of maturity that obviously the young single mother did not, due to the situation she is in.
gllahone84
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Here's a dude (JesusShuttlesworth34) that actually has real life experience and you're telling us he has an objective view?
Well of course he does, he actually had a relationship (unlike a lot of you) with a single mom so he knows the truth. 
And how many single mother's have you dated and/or been in a relationship with for you to have such an authority on this subject because you seem to be going and on like Dr Phil in here.
gllahone84
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I've dated 2 and from my experience hell no.
shoelyesses
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yes if your in a situation then yes you would be bias etc... its no different then any other viewpoint being race, religion, social/money status... example if im from the projects it would seem that i would be able to relate to someone being from the projects then someone who isnt. aka he can relate to the single mother struggle and how the kids must feel etc...because he was a byproduct of it. He cannot however speak on how it is to not have come from a single mother home...and speak from the other viewpoint because he didnt live that life....Here's a dude (JesusShuttlesworth34) that actually has real life experience and you're telling us he has an objective view?Well of course he does, he actually had a relationship (unlike a lot of you) with a single mom so he knows the truth.
And how many single mother's have you dated and/or been in a relationship with for you to have such an authority on this subject because you seem to be going and on like Dr Phil in here.
Ive dated plenty of single mothers...but i didnt actively pursue them on some im out scouring specifically for a single mother.....(but when i was a teen,early 20's no i didnt, not on some im trying to have a long term possibly married kids with and thats where most of these posters are at) and i didnt have a bias towards them due to comming from a single mother home because i didnt come from a single mother home. And the only truth he knows is his personally accounts...his experiences. In which i stated. But many of the guys in here where speaking in general as far as facts... And many of you guys are taking your personal experiences and success and pretty much dismissing facts, which i stated earlier.
For example if i hire a prior felon and it turns out great for me....that doesnt mean oh well since i had success with it, doesnt change the FACTS of 66% of felons are repeat offenders and probably will return to jail. And thats exactly what many of the ppl who are speaking in this thread are doing. they are taking their personal success stories, or bias feelings due to comming from a single mother home...and totally dismissing and ignoring the fact that overwhelmingly majority of the time doesnt end up this way.
Ask yourself this what if we thought this way about other facist of life... i meet one insert any race that was racist... and despite the fact majority of that race wasnt racist... spoke as if all or majority of that race was racist...based on personal experiences. And how that would be wrong. Same thing applies here.
He may very well have a good single mother...great/good if he does...But that doesnt change the fact that majority of them arent of the caliber of women he claims his girl to be. Like i said seems as if hurt dogs are hollering in here. No one said every single single mother is no good etc... But many are...for someone to get in such a uproar about this shows...must be some truth to the no good mother statement in their personal lives...and it kinda struck a nerve, hence the need to defend/combat the statement.. aka hurt dog hollers.
rex ryan
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Mr. Shuttlesworth speaks some real truth. I must say that
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Shoely your post are too big for me bruh
Dumb it down
Dumb it down
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You 'dated plenty of single mothers' when you were younger and you didn't 'grow up with a single mother'
So basically you're basing your OPINION about dating single mothers on STATISTICS?
Duly noted!
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No worries, to each their own. "Whatever floats your boat or helps you find your lost remote...."
I'm about to learn you something so get ready...and pull out your notepad and you can send me your email address so I can invoice you:
-well there you go...and you proved my point...you relate to the single mother plight, because you are a byproduct of it. And with that you also have a miskewed and bias view of a single mother due to the fact your mom was one. You can accept that/deny that w.e. but it will still remain true. You dont have an objective view...you cannot have an outside looking in insight on the situation when your living inside of the bubble.
- You sound foolish and ignorant calling it a "Single Mother Plight." Steel sharpens steel, I am a better person from coming from the gutter and I love it. I out hustle everyone I've ever encountered on the baseball field/bball court and every ignorant person.....Ask your boy PowerBallin' about what happened to him..
- I've been exposed to both upbrinings as I lived/spent Summers with my Aunt/Uncle out in Arizona and I loved it. There is nothing wrong with having two parents, everyone should.....but it can make people comfortable and unappreciative because they were born into that. I came from nothing and I appreciate every dollar because I know how hard it is to make one and what it's like to grow up and not celebrate Christmas. I know what it's like to barely have money for a Grocery List....never mind the damn Christmas List. Again, I am not bashing people with solid households, who would be foolish enough to do that....I am saying if you have that, appreciate that and give back to the less fortunate then.... don't be an arrogant prick throwing money around all willy nilly.
And how is it selfish, or a guy isnt a real man because he wants to marry/grow and develop a relationship with one woman...as oppose to taking on the responsibilities of someone else?
So i guess your saying because i decided to meet a girl, develop and grow together and raise our child together, im somehow selfish and isnt a real as you....lol.
- Quit guessing...you sound young and ill-prepared for intelligent banter and logical discussion. Guessing is what you do in Grade School when you don't know answers on a pop quiz.
And no one said every woman who has kids is a j.o., loose, etc.... but you and others be it bias...because your moms was a single mom, be it for w.e. myriad of reasons are brushing it under the rug, ignoring, and being dismissive of the fact that a majority are.
- What the hell were you trying to say here? You just contradicted yourself in the same damn sentence. You said...."No one said every woman who has kids"......but I am "being dismissive of the fact that a (*the) majority of them are."
- You sound so lost and confused that you confused your own self with this brilliant remark.
The fact that you have to self promote yourself almost in a holier then thou light shows, apparently there is some sort of issue with it. I mean only a hurt dog hollers. If a young guy in the early stages of his life who is trying to grow mature etc... decides he wants to take a woman who is at the same place he is at, life journeys together, how does that make him any less of a man, as oppose to a guy, who takes a girl who made ill advised decisions, wrong choices and now trying to move forward from them, and you accepting that and in a sense trying to meet/catch up to where she is in her journey in life?
- Self promote yourself...? What the hell? Anyways, once again you are projecting your own insecurities and putting words in my mouth. I did not say any of the such. If you inferred that from the opinions I actually shared then you have greater things/issues to worry about than this discussion. I said what I am and what I am not....I spoke about ME, not you or those I don't know about it. All I know is me and that is what I speak about.
Thats borderline of saying it takes more of a man to adopt and raise a kid, then it does a man to have and raise his own kid...which is simply foolish. Again there isnt anything wrong with dating hell even long term/marrying a woman with kids if she is a suitable mate. But it doesnt somehow makes you more of a man or better then the guy who chooses a woman, a single woman has kids with her and stays with her.
- It takes a certain kind of a man to adopt a child and love him/her as his own....your perspective will dictate how you view that and I personally feel that Man needs to be of high character, strong, focused, loving, compassionate to love something that is not "his." This whole "better/best" argument is foolish and I am not sure where that came from. I stated an opinion and you are turning this into a debate about my life? Opinions are opinions and debatable. My feelings and experiences are not up for debate as they happened already.....they can't be right or wrong, they just are.
And i dont know your personal situation or relationship with a single mom, but many of times like i stated be it, due to not being able to find a suitable mate that is single with no kids, the generational curse, the damsel in distress aka trying to be the kinda guy i wish my mom would have met while being a single mom etc... and subconciously fill that role by going out and being with a single mom. You ended up with a single mom. Many of single guys dont have the aforementioned issues etc.. and if they find themselves in a position especially if there in the early stages of life and just trying to get to know themselves and figure out who and what they are....it would be selfish and inconsiderate to try to take on the responsibility of trying to not only be in a stable long term relationship, but to take on to some degree a father figure role for a child not your own.
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- You are so off base it's not even funny. I have dated one girl with child. I don't have a fetish or a fantasy about them. You sound really young and ignorant. This is my current lady and she is from NY and a Lawyer in DC. ANDDDDDDD NO KIDS! Wow.
- I'll say my connection with the Single Mother is far greater than the current girl, because she can relate to the struggle and grind of having to overcome a lot to make it in life.
- The Single Mother is a GS-12 going on GS-13 pulling over six figures as well doing IA work.....at age 26 and four years out of school. We have a house together and all that.
Just because unlike the mother, he made/makes a concious good decision, and accept he isnt in the position to fullfiil this role, and isnt prepared for it, doesnt make him selfish. So just because the mother didnt take into account all these factors and assess the situation, and he does, doesnt make him selfish, less of a man etc.. It means he understand that he isnt in the postion to fully be responsible and isnt at a point to care guide etc... his own life let alone the life of another human being. And if anything that shows he isnt selfish, is a real man and shows a level of maturity that obviously the young single mother did not, due to the situation she is in.
- What the hell...this is so incoherent. I just wasted time on such a frivolous debate, but hopefully you are not as ignorant as before.
- The "situation the single mother" (my former lady) is in is better than 95% of the situations other "women" from "two parent stable households" come from are in.
- I've been with plenty of women through college, working for the Government, traveling, etc. ......and the Single Mother was in my Top 5 of just great/real/authentic people.
Now at least this was a respectable and educated response. You still aren't basing it off "your" own experience....it's coming from the observation of your cousins, but you are entitled to do so and you are exactly right with your closing statement.....I am, fortunately, not the majority of men and that is why I have no problem making "friends" and meeting women every time I move to a new city or go out. Good vibes and people can feel my positive spirit.
Thanks for all the input and comments. You got me in the zone as this is what I do....I am a writer. I wrote billion dollar proposals, but I enjoy discussion like this.
Good job to all.
Thanks.
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This ***** just went to school.
Overhead projector and all.
Overhead projector and all.
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i knew this shoelysses dude was a smartdumb cat punching keys and whatnot...
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*Drops Mic and walks off the stage..."
This is like when B Rabbit just served up Pop A Doc....
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Some of us do have lives...fun lives off NT. I been here for a grip and try to give back and encourage and lift up some of the younger members to stop thinking so negatively!
Ask what happened to PB who tried to flex and harass my first girlfriend a few weeks ago at my farewell party:
Insert Pic Here But Don't Want to Get Banned Again!
This is like when B Rabbit just served up Pop A Doc....
View media item 439959View media item 439960View media item 439961View media item 439962View media item 439963
Some of us do have lives...fun lives off NT. I been here for a grip and try to give back and encourage and lift up some of the younger members to stop thinking so negatively!
Ask what happened to PB who tried to flex and harass my first girlfriend a few weeks ago at my farewell party:
Insert Pic Here But Don't Want to Get Banned Again!
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yo b, thats all cute and all and im glad that you happy and all that, but da fact remains:
chick with no kids > chick with kids if everything else is equal.
how does this need to be explained any further?
chick with no kids > chick with kids if everything else is equal.
how does this need to be explained any further?
rex ryan
Banned
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What happened to powerballin?
