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Everything you need to tell him you already wrote on pg 1. You sound like a good guy, he shouldn't get upset over feelings not being mutual. That's childish.
How would you deal with a good friend falling for you when the feelings aren't mutual?
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The irony here is that I came in thinking it was a female situation haha. Honestly your in a tough situation, and I would hate to pretend to know what I would do in this situation. I would like to think I would be just as cool as my boy always was man. As long as he cool with me just diggin the females though. As weird as it sounds, the friendship has a much better chance to survive. Trust me, you tell a woman who wants to screw you that you just want to be friends- haha good luck with that.
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didnt readMan...I got the shock of my life last night
One of my best friends last night not only confessed that he liked men as well as women, but that he also had feelings for me since college
Look, I've had and still have other gay friends and female friends, but this is completely different cause dude was like a brother to me. Him being bisexual/gay/whatever isn't what changed how I thought of him (it wasn't even a shock really, cause dude always had some feminine tendencies and interests), but the whole idea of someone I considered to be family confessing his real feelings towards me...
I really don't know what to do. I'm not angry or digusted; I'm sad because I feel like a good friendship that I had is gone now. He said "I don't expect you to feel the same since I know you're straight. But I just had to let it out because I don't want to hold on to this anymore. We've gone through some @#$% before and we're still cool today, and I hope we can still be cool even after this, but I understand if you don't want to be friends anymore."
I don't believe it's that easy to just forget it and move on with the friendship like nothing happened. To me, something like that only happens on TV. I've had female friends confess their feelings for me before, and even though we're on good terms today, it's just not the same as before. No serious conversations, no making plans to kick it, only talk when we're at the same party or via FB/IG posts, etc. They basically became acquaintances instead of friends, but like I said, I never minded much cause I wasn't THAT close to them.
So what do you guys suggest I do/say? I know a bunch of idiots will come in here and say ":x" "pepper your angus" and all that other 12 year old BS, but I know there's some mature dudes on here who can give good advice.
And yes, I'm posting this on NT instead of talking to my other friends about it, because they're all cool with him too, and I don't want to stir up any potential drama especially since I'm the only one he told this to.
i see u stay in sf though
just send her to me so i can knock em down
she aint gonna be worrying about u anymore fam
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That's probably something that's been weighing on him for awhile, so just let have him get that off his chest.
Basically say yeah I'm straight but you still my homie we practically brothers .. and keep a distance until he finds a dude/girl
Basically say yeah I'm straight but you still my homie we practically brothers .. and keep a distance until he finds a dude/girl
Gill Baka Esq. LLC.
formerly grimlock
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If my close friend told me he was gay - totally fine, still my friend and we gonna be homies like always
If my close fried told me he was gay and he like me - chill breh
If my close fried told me he was gay and he like me - chill breh
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"BRO!!! I TOOK SHOWERS WITH YOU"
"I LET YOU SHAVE MY BALLS!!"
"I LET YOU SHAVE MY BALLS!!"
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Looks like this guy is more than willing to take care of your problem.didnt readMan...I got the shock of my life last night
One of my best friends last night not only confessed that he liked men as well as women, but that he also had feelings for me since college
Look, I've had and still have other gay friends and female friends, but this is completely different cause dude was like a brother to me. Him being bisexual/gay/whatever isn't what changed how I thought of him (it wasn't even a shock really, cause dude always had some feminine tendencies and interests), but the whole idea of someone I considered to be family confessing his real feelings towards me...
I really don't know what to do. I'm not angry or digusted; I'm sad because I feel like a good friendship that I had is gone now. He said "I don't expect you to feel the same since I know you're straight. But I just had to let it out because I don't want to hold on to this anymore. We've gone through some @#$% before and we're still cool today, and I hope we can still be cool even after this, but I understand if you don't want to be friends anymore."
I don't believe it's that easy to just forget it and move on with the friendship like nothing happened. To me, something like that only happens on TV. I've had female friends confess their feelings for me before, and even though we're on good terms today, it's just not the same as before. No serious conversations, no making plans to kick it, only talk when we're at the same party or via FB/IG posts, etc. They basically became acquaintances instead of friends, but like I said, I never minded much cause I wasn't THAT close to them.
So what do you guys suggest I do/say? I know a bunch of idiots will come in here and say ":x" "pepper your angus" and all that other 12 year old BS, but I know there's some mature dudes on here who can give good advice.
And yes, I'm posting this on NT instead of talking to my other friends about it, because they're all cool with him too, and I don't want to stir up any potential drama especially since I'm the only one he told this to.
i see u stay in sf though
just send her to me so i can knock em down
she aint gonna be worrying about u anymore fam
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damb. had this happen to me recently, but with a female.
i was cool with it at first and was gonna just put it aside, but then found out she was lowkey obsessed with me and wouldn't stop talking about me with MY friends. i got weirded out and kinda just went ghost. stopped hitting her up and what not.
now she's being overly dramatic and making it seem as if i'm bad mouthing her to my friends and telling them to not hang out with her
i heard all this from a friend of mine and i was just like
i dont have time for this petty ****
i guess if you take something from this, clear the air and let your homie know how it is. if you're weirded out by out, let it be known. it'll take time for it to be normal again, but at least let him know so he doesn't jump to conclusions and become dramatic/butt hurt (no pun intended) about it.
i was cool with it at first and was gonna just put it aside, but then found out she was lowkey obsessed with me and wouldn't stop talking about me with MY friends. i got weirded out and kinda just went ghost. stopped hitting her up and what not.
now she's being overly dramatic and making it seem as if i'm bad mouthing her to my friends and telling them to not hang out with her
i heard all this from a friend of mine and i was just like
i dont have time for this petty ****
i guess if you take something from this, clear the air and let your homie know how it is. if you're weirded out by out, let it be known. it'll take time for it to be normal again, but at least let him know so he doesn't jump to conclusions and become dramatic/butt hurt (no pun intended) about it.
Mister Meaner
formerly super producer j
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[quote name="nyzthoro" ]Obviously things won't be the same, but let him know you'll still be in his corner regardless of his lifestyle choice.
[/quote]
THIS.
Not sure if serious or whimsical method of coming out to NT
.
[/quote]
THIS.
Not sure if serious or whimsical method of coming out to NT
.
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seems like you're confused but it's simple, really.
have sex with a girl.
have sex with your friend.
then compare.
have sex with a girl.
have sex with your friend.
then compare.
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Just ask him if he think you guys can still be friends or would it be too uncomfortable for him. Regardless of what he says you can just leave it at that. I still don't understand why he just didn't keep it to himself unless he was interpreting your feelings for him differently.
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sonoftony
Supporter
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If you go out for a drink with him, don't leave your drink unattended
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I don't get why he couldn't keep it to himself if he knew you aren't gay, unless he suspected you were on the DL like him. Either way from my standpoint I don't see how he's gonna be able to talk to you about that side of his life without you putting yourself directly into the equation. Furthermore, I don't see how you could hang out together and not second guess any gestures of "niceties" or camaraderie. For example you're playing ball and he gives you a pat on the ___ or a high five and not think that there's something else behind that smile he just flashed you or that he hopes there's more to it. Or say you watching the playoffs and Davis just scored the game winning touchdown, instinctively you go in for a bro hug and his hand go a little too low.......
IDK I just see it as all male bonding situations becoming extra awkward, or you overcompensating for the awkwardness since you guys are such good friends. It's probably why all the females in your situation with them limited their interaction with you after they confessed. I really don't see anything but you having to cut him loose as a friend.
IDK I just see it as all male bonding situations becoming extra awkward, or you overcompensating for the awkwardness since you guys are such good friends. It's probably why all the females in your situation with them limited their interaction with you after they confessed. I really don't see anything but you having to cut him loose as a friend.
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Weird situation. I came into this thread thinking it was chick being real with you. It's crazy to think that stuff like with will be a lot more common in the future.
Like...how do you respond to that? Deal even with that in the back of your mind. I've had 2 past female friends admit this to me, but we were able to keep it moving. This is something different. I'd be stuck.
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He should have kept it to himself if he knew you were straight
Maybe he thinks you're on the fence, OP.
SRS.
Maybe he thinks you're on the fence, OP.
SRS.
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