Tell your "Seinfeld" story Vol. Everybody has at least one

coldcity

coldcity

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Great idea by spiceman in the "Seinfeld came out 25 years ago" thread

Spiceman80 said:
everybody has a Seinfeld story, tell us yours.
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& ill repost mine before adding more...

walking up to my firends apt with my gf & this random guy walks up & trys to slide in the gate behind us. i said "do you have a key? i dont want to be the guy who let a robber or something in the building" he just looked at me crazy but never responded(as i close the gate in his face).... we get to the actual entrance door & while im typing in the entry code & he glides between me & the gf with his KEY, unlocked the door & just gave me the nastiest stink face :rofl:


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I don't know if this one works but I'll shoot.


Was in the bathroom and work and this dude was in the stall for a while a guess.

He must have dosed off because the scent thing on the wall squirted "TSSSSST!" and it startled him. The stall doors shook like crazy and me and another dude taking a wiz died laughing.




Another bathroom story.


So there are three wall urinals in the restroom and one guy is already at the far right so I take the far left.

Out of nowhere (Didn't even hear the door open to the restroom) this big bald headed 6 foot 5 brother with the deepest voice slides into the middle urinal saying " MMMHHH How Ya'll Doin?" in a deep grumbling tone. Mad awkward. I am not trying to have conversation with two other dudes about my day while holding my jank.
 
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Can't think of a Seinfeld story at this moment but George changed my life. Brb buying drinks with no ice cause I get more liquid
 
Never watched Seinfeld so im not sure i probably do, sounds like awkward moments.
 
Seinfeld was my dad's favorite show. Probably one of the few times we'd sit and watch tv together.
 
When I was in my early teens I decided to try to fap. It was like 11pm on a Friday night and I was just going to town on myself. As i started to nut the feeling was so intense I got woozy and fainted. I a couple minutes later I wake up to hear my mom screaming from here room next door if I was ok. I pulled my shorts up screamed I was fine and jumped in my bed. Best/worst feeling ever. I could only imagine the horror she would have experienced if she walked in and I was passed out with my pecker in my hand with jizz everywhere. 
 
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offwhitewhite said:
 
silkboi said:
Seinfeld was my dad's favorite show. Probably one of the few times we'd sit and watch tv together.
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nathanaguilar said:
When I was in my early teens I decided to try to fap. It was like 11pm on a Friday night and I was just going to town on myself. As i started to nut the feeling was so intense I got woozy and fainted. I a couple minutes later I wake up to hear my mom screaming from here room next door if I was ok. I pulled my shorts up screamed I was fine and jumped in my bed. Best/worst feeling ever. I could only imagine the horror she would have experienced if she walked in and I was passed out with my pecker in my hand with jizz everywhere. 
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:rofl:
 
          First week when I went back to college. Beginning of the semester, like the 2nd time this class met. 3 hour class so the Prof. decided to give us a 15 minute break midway through. I have this bad quirk, my stomach would always grumble even when I'm not hungry, ONLY when I'm in a situation like a classroom or any other setting where it's silence. IDK, if it's a nervous tick or whatever. This was starting to happen right before the 15 minute break commenced so I head to the vending machines. Look down into my pocket and a 10 dollar bill looks back up at me. Damn, I'm not about to have 9 golden dollars or 36 quarters jingling in my pocket all day. I saw this dude from my class, he was black, and I ask him if he has any change. He says he doesn't but offers me a dollar bill so I can get something. I was going to take it but I felt like it was too early to be leeching off people already, at least let me have a few conversations with someone before I go off borrowing money. I politely decline and decide to take the L.

          On my way back to class I pass by a couple of chicks, politely nod and my stomach lets out an enormous grumble that I swear echoed a little bit in the hallway. This isn't good. Another hour and 15 minutes sitting in class with me quantizing 808's from my belly. Last resort, I turn around right before entering class and see this goofy Russian dude and ask him if he has any change. Once again, he doesn't but offers me a dollar bill instead. Once again, I didn't want to take it but entering that class without a bite to eat is going to be social suicide. I take the dollar bill and turn to head to the vending machines and I see the black dude from before just staring at me like :

I tried to say something, gesture but it nothing came out. I didn't even want to go back into class after. It was incredibly awkward and the worst way to start a semester. Looking back on it though, it's pretty hilarious.
 
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YES thats a good story fam :rofl:

i know the black dude thinking"so my money aint green enough for ya huh?" :lol:
 
nawghtyhare said:
 
ColdCity said:
 
Frank Mucus said:
Can't think of a Seinfeld story at this moment but George changed my life. Brb buying drinks with no ice cause I get more liquid
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thats the truth... always "lite ice"
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Yup I always ask for 3 ice cubes
That way it's colder than no ice
Not watered down by a bunch of melted ice
And still a lot more liquid
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 ​
People probably do all types of **** to your drinks 
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 at least at fast food places.​
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Them ice machines be coming out fast as hell, it must be annoying to time it to get only 3. Or to put em in a bowl and get a spoon or something to put em in there.​
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Dudes probably picking their nose, booty and ears and then putting the cubes in by hand. Probably soaking your ice cubes in wee wee cheese.​
 
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