NT Bros

Soooo i am a long time lurker and very infrequent poster, in fact lurked for a long time before joining (around 04, my senior year)


Sooo im on vacation in the city i love and want to move too and i dont know bros.....**** has just gone awful, like im really searching for a reason to press forward...

I just dont know whats wrong w me and i feel as if i meed to get it off my chest and get some different perspective before i do something stupid....

Soo just a little background about me without giving too much away and sorry if this sounds arrogant...im about 1.5 years from 30...pretty smart, maybe too much for my own good and it makes me be real skeptical, but anyway, good job, good pay, one section from getting my CPA, but making good money now, so ive not been pressed to finish...but anyways

Like i just dont know bros i feel like its all downhill from here, like somewhat looking for a partner and blah without getting into too much, yeaaa same ole **** and i can see the same **** happening again and agaiin, and its not just w chicks, like advice to keep getting money, like i have money, its not everything and whats the point of stacking more money if you do not have anyone to spend it with....and just to elaborate more, like one of the things that was keeping me plugging forward was/is my dog, but that is playing a role too, so im in accounting and audit so i travell all the time and i can tell he is happier at my parents now,'its like everything i touch or that likes me, ends up ******* hating me....

So im watching videos on base jumping earlier and dudes talking abiut the peaceful feeling between hitting the ground and the parachute opening or malfunctioning amd ya know, it does sound quite peaceful to not have a way out....

Try dating online man

Go to the gym and get swole

I have said this before on NT but my sister once told me that your 30s are when you really start living. You have time dude nothing going downhill yet.

It's never downhill.

Get your CPA. Be positive and find enjoyment in life. Take a random class or do an activity off Groupon. Talk to new people. Enjoy yourself and your time on Earth. Be positive.

Travel more and experience different cultures or perspectives. Don't be afraid of change, embrace it before you regret things.

My motto is "****'ll buff out." We all go through it. Sounds like you're bored. Get into something new.

Sounds like you're concerned that life will be monotonous from your 30s on, but at the same time aren't sure that the things (or comfort they bring) that come to most at that age will come to you. Even the money that you're already making presents sort of an issue in itself. Getting your CPA will be big and it sounds like things are going well career-wise for you.

You also sound wary of getting too close to people. Do you have some good friends you could talk to about some of this? They're going through this transition as well so they'd be good to talk to. As for a partner, sure some previous experiences with women seem like the same thing over and over but one day you'll find a girl that will break that cycle. If you're so worried about making a mistake, take your time, don't rush into anything, and just let things develop.

Along with talking things out with some friends going through the same thing, my other piece of advice would be to not let yourself get too absorbed into the idea that you should be doing _______ at ___ age. Find and do what makes you happy.

Sounds like you plateued. Find a new hobby or start dating, find new people to hang around with that interests you.

Johnson1 said:

Try dating online man

Go to the gym and get swole

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I hear ya, appreciate the words, but I've tried online dating and I can get dates and get chicks, its just a matter of me reverting to an idiot if I actually like someone, but yea maybe the right just hasn't come along....as far as the gym goes...I am pretty strong for my weight, (not for my height), but i'm not a bodybuilder type body or build....even when I was "brolic strong", I could not gain more then an extra 10-12 pounds of what I am at now...I'm build more like Michael Phelps say in a swimmer that is strong, but still has long lean muscles.....i'm sure this sounds frail, but i'm 5'11, 148....but really strong for my size, tons of push-ups/pull-ups....and thats purposeful, my dad is a tall/large very overweight man, and I tend to like to do alot of outdoor things as far as hiking and walking alot of places, so at most, I would want to add 5-8 more pounds of muscle.   However I cut gluten out 2 months ago or so, and actually is why i'm under 150, i did not see any loses as far as weight and amount of weight / body repetition I was doing during my exercises.   but again, this is starting to get old to just bang random biddies...Maybe i've just ******* fast forwarded through some maturation phase idk...

Suberzat1 said:

I have said this before on NT but my sister once told me that your 30s are when you really start living. You have time dude nothing going downhill yet.

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I hear ya and appreciate the words bro.  I would agree with your sister as far as females are concerned.  Males I'm not so sure about....John Mulaney's joke...nothing worse then a single 38-40 year old lonely man.....even if you got loot, the chicks with you are there for your loot at that point, I do not like fake people haha one major thing.

JohnnyRedStorm said:

It's never downhill.

Get your CPA. Be positive and find enjoyment in life. Take a random class or do an activity off Groupon. Talk to new people. Enjoy yourself and your time on Earth. Be positive.

Travel more and experience different cultures or perspectives. Don't be afraid of change, embrace it before you regret things.

Click to expand...

See your posts alot man, appreciate the words, respect your thoughts.  CPA is meh, i am sure I will get it, I'm sitting for the last section in October and I'm ready, I've passed the others without any problem, I just do not see a reason or a point.

Let me elaborate some as I love your points about the class and activity and talking to new people.  I believe you are in NYC if I am not mistaken?  if so, then I agree with you like crazy.  My job with audit has me on the road all the time now, and my "base" area / where I home my house, is one of the other reasons I am actually somewhat in this funk I am in.  I really hate the area I live in, and it sucks because its where I grew up, where all my family and extended family is, yet I just do not like it one bit.  I'll put my flame suit on, but I am a very socially progressive liberal, and I live in a bible belt very conservative, gun-toting (nothing wrong with it, it just not my vibe or flavor of tea, i grew up around responsible gun owners, so to each their own, same with religion, just not my cup of tea), so every time I am not on the road, i'm pretty depressed at home (on top of the dog now not really wanting to be with me at my place, he tolerates it lol.

I do really believe in karma, and thats why i'm a little bit in feeling how I am.  I always try to put good vibes in the air, truly do not talk badly about people, generous with money to help friends/family, generous with my time for volunteering...maybe even call me a beta male in a sense...but ehhh for another time, and maybe why I felt as if I fit into Canada much better.  But i'll be honest, i've been here 3 days this trip already (of which is like my 8th time in Toronto), and i'm starting to not be as pleased with the city.  This is also playing into my state of mind as well as in part of getting out of the area I am in, I want to move to either a) Toronto, b)Vancouver, c)Seattle, d)LA, e)NYC.  However, 1/2 are much higher on my list as I have job perspectives and offers in 1 of the other 3 and will in all 3 once I am fully licensed.  However, the process with the visa and then trying to settle and get PR / eventual citizenship is daunting and a long process, and based on this trip, making me really unsure what the **** i am doing.

I've traveled alot with my job, but I hear you, I mean I've been all over North America (Mexico, Canada, US), however no Euro countries, but I am not afraid of change at all man.  I'm super open-minded and the regret thing is the one thing I worry about where I may be shy in situations, maybe I just need to start doing ****.

MPLSdunk said:

My motto is "****'ll buff out." We all go through it. Sounds like you're bored. Get into something new.

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great motto, I try to go with "it is what it is", but that is not helping me at the moment as this is how it has been for the last 2-3 years of my life.  I may be somewhat bored and elaborated on it above, but i may be striving something unattainable as well...

AgentZero said:

 
Sounds like you're concerned that life will be monotonous from your 30s on, but at the same time aren't sure that the things (or comfort they bring) that come to most at that age will come to you. Even the money that you're already making presents sort of an issue in itself. Getting your CPA will be big and it sounds like things are going well career-wise for you.

You also sound wary of getting too close to people. Do you have some good friends you could talk to about some of this? They're going through this transition as well so they'd be good to talk to. As for a partner, sure some previous experiences with women seem like the same thing over and over but one day you'll find a girl that will break that cycle. If you're so worried about making a mistake, take your time, don't rush into anything, and just let things develop.

Along with talking things out with some friends going through the same thing, my other piece of advice would be to not let yourself get too absorbed into the idea that you should be doing _______ at ___ age. Find and do what makes you happy.

Click to expand...

Appreciate the reply fam, have seen your posts and we are from the same area (state, maybe not area) if I believe, but i do not want to give too much away about myself lol.  Things are going well career wise, and maybe too well, I tried to elaborate on that more above in the post about my home area and lifing there...i am concerned that life will be monotonous as it already feels like that now.

That is very true, I am very skeptical of people and not very open (DRAKE no new friends right?).  I have a few good friends, but not really to talk to about this, even people i've known since I was young, I'm not sure I could unload some of this on them (and why i am posting here, I really did not have much of another outlet).  I am the ones that the friends usually unload on and try to offer reasonable advice.  I really have not put myself in that situation before, not sure who to talk to .. Most of my friends going through a transition as well to talk to this about (guy or girl) are already married or in a long term relationship, with some of my bros even being "jealous" of me being able to bang multiple chicks, but ehh it gets old as I said.  that maybe low t, idk, but not as much of a horndog as I once was.  I hear you and actually have heard that from two of my good friends on taking my time and not rushing into anything and letting develop, so I appreciate that...i did try that this time, but yea who knows, maybe I'm just not where I need to be mentally to attract the partner I want.

I appreciate that and hear you on doing x @ x...however if I want to immigrate, I need to try to do it before I'm 31-32 (at least the process) so after 2-3 years when I go to apply for PR i'm still in the magic "Canadian" window age for maximum points haha.

Like I said, I really appreciate the words and support for a long time lurker.  I'm going to go take a walk outside, see what is up with the city, hopefully some of the thoughts dissipate, althought that is how some came to me yesterday.

I'm still here with more of a postitive outlook this morning, appreciate the words of support, will try to check back in this afternoon fam.

You sound depressed.

Go talk to a psychiatrist and vent a little, hell vent a lot.


If money doesn't make you happy then give it to me, I'll know what to do with it...


If all else fails just cop a HEMI.

You'll be fine dude. You have a good head on your shoulders, you're just going through the motions with the next chapter of life. If you don't find yourself enjoying Toronto, maybe check out one of those other cities you could have employment potential. Maybe you'll enjoy one of those cities more. Go for a trip, clear your head and have fun. Just be aware of yourself and take action when you need to. Be active and positive.

You're in google maps street view version of your life. Zoom out, look at the big picture and where you want to be in your life. Are you headed in the right direction? In the whole scheme of things, this is just a rest stop in your life. Start navigating away from the mundane and steer towards what makes you happy. Also, surround yourself with people that are happy and have goals. Don't be afraid to straight up as people "How do you do it?" " How do you stay positive?" "How did you get to the position you are in now?" Also, don't be afraid to look back and appreciate how far you have come.

I try to think that people have information. Some great and some useless. I try to talk to good people and "download" their positive thoughts/experiences/knowledge. Just do the best you can.

This also helps me" "“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” - Maya Angelou

Can't really offer you any advice, but I wish the best for you OP.

DeeksDog said:

I do really believe in karma, and thats why i'm a little bit in feeling how I am.  I always try to put good vibes in the air, truly do not talk badly about people, generous with money to help friends/family, generous with my time for volunteering...maybe even call me a beta male in a sense...but ehhh for another time, and maybe why I felt as if I fit into Canada much better.  But i'll be honest, i've been here 3 days this trip already (of which is like my 8th time in Toronto), and i'm starting to not be as pleased with the city.  This is also playing into my state of mind as well as in part of getting out of the area I am in, I want to move to either a) Toronto, b)Vancouver, c)Seattle, d)LA, e)NYC.  However, 1/2 are much higher on my list as I have job perspectives and offers in 1 of the other 3 and will in all 3 once I am fully licensed.  However, the process with the visa and then trying to settle and get PR / eventual citizenship is daunting and a long process, and based on this trip, making me really unsure what the **** i am doing.

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Famb helping people with either your time or money is not Beta. Get that ish out of your head.

Come to Cali if you do move. Women & Weather do the soul good. 

I feel that you think your life is monotone & that you're probly unsure of where to go next in life.

Describe an avg week.

OP, you need to find your passion. It will take months and maybe years. Until you find something your passionate about and want to do it for a living. You'll continue to be depressed.... |I