OFFICIAL NFL Discussion Thread: 2015-16 Season - Congrats to the Denver Broncos and their fans! SB 5

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Here we go again :rofl: :rofl: http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2015-indianapolis-colts-1728020622

Nick:

We get beat by 30+ points and we blame a barely deflated ball.

Ryan Grigson looks like a sleaze-ball and Irsay IS a sleaze-ball.

Luck is great, but Grigson and Pagano have no idea how to build a respectable defense and the offensive line is a sieve.

We’ll lose by 30 in the playoffs to the Pats again this year, at which point we’ll come up with another lame excuse.
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Nick:

Luck is the entire team, but our owner prefers to spend the money on personal use elephant tranquilizers instead of an O-line. Fortunately, the AFC South consists of the Houston Oilers twice and a team that even LA doesn’t want. We’ll spend the regular season winning the division and lubing up for the vigorous annual January Brady **** party. **** Tom Brady.
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1. I’ve seen more Peyton Manning jerseys at games after he left for the Broncos. You’d think the Broncos had moved here

2. We’ve been calling the almost-yearly AFC championship game against the Patriots a “rivalry” game, which is very generous given our record against them every time in it.

3. There are two types of Colts fans: rich white ******** from Carmel and Fishers in the northern suburbs (outside of Indianapolis), and poor white ******** on the southside suburbs (technically inside city limits but you wouldn’t know it looking around, what with all the stripmalls and poverty). They both say suspiciously coded things about how they’re glad the Colts don’t have any “thug” fans like Tampa Bay or Oakland.

4. We pretend Andrew Luck is still a rookie with rookie potential every year, stretching into his 4th year, when most QB’ would be considered half-way to retirement.

5. All the die-hard fans that I had known for 10 years of winning seasons suddenly disappeared after Peyton got injured and we went 2-14, then came back when we started winning again (the Pacers have the same problem, our city just has ****** fans).

6. All the die-hard fans claiming that they “stuck it out” with the team when we were losing that one year, when I know for a fact even the ******** with season tickets didn’t go to games.

7. All the die-hard fans even pretending that it’s hard being a fan of a team that constantly does well, as if they have some kinship with the ******* Browns fans or something.

8. Our complete and utter inability to be outraged by Irsay’s constant DUIs. You’d think being wealthy enough to hire 8 drivers would allow him to not drive while he’s coked up and drunk, but here we are. He is a piece of human garbage who put his enjoyment before the lives of others and received a slap on the wrist.

9. The fact that it was during a Colts game I was watching on tv when I was 16 that I realized, after dozing off and coming-to in the 3rd quarter with nothing having changed over half a game, that I hated watching football.

10. **** this team and **** every Carmel kid who thinks they’re “repping” Indianapolis by wearing a Colts jersey even though they to cover their wallets whenever black person walks by them downtown.
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Zac:

The only difference between Ryan Grigson and Matt Millen is that Grigson had an obvious franchise QB pick and didn’t screw it up.
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Justin:

We suck because I downright hoped we would lose to Denver in the playoffs simply because I knew we would get our faces ****** into eternity if we went against NE. LeGarrette Blount is a ******* turd & can never see the field any other time of the season because he sucks so bad & is lazy and getting baked with an actual good RB. But when it’s time to play the Colts he turns into Barry Sanders & Jim Brown’s love child. I’m awaiting his bust in Canton solely based on his play against us. After getting starched in the playoffs, how do we stop this problem? We burn our first round pick on another shiny new offensive toy. Our offensive line is still going to be as useful as a mesh screen door on a submarine.

**** our drunk, selfie taking owner for basically calling everybody out saying “Super Bowl or bust”.
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I went to college just outside of NYC from 2002-2006, in the height of the Manning-era Colts’ days of bull-dozing through the regular season only to get embarrassingly crushed in the playoffs where you, like, need a defense and a quarterback that doesn’t act like a sullen teen after every goddamn incompletion. Despite the fact that the school was in New York, the vast majority of the students were Patriot fans. Oh God how I wanted to gloat after a Colts playoff victory, but it never happened. ****—the games were never even competitive. It sucked.

The first year I moved back to Indiana the team accidentally fielded a good playoff defense and we won the Super Bowl despite the fact that Peyton threw for like 30 yards. I was surrounded by cheering hillbillies and completely missed out on my opportunity to rub it in those smug-*** Patriot fans’ faces.

Manning leaves, new regime takes over, and we get another once-in-a-lifetime QB. I figure we are destined to fix the mistakes of the past, right? A FIRST-ROUNDER FOR TRENT RICHARDSON and another bed-******** against a Patriots team that proves that you-don’t-need-superstars-at-every-offensive-position-if-you-have-a-top-tier-QB-and-talent-on-defense

later… and we draft a WR in the first round and sign Andre Johnson and Frank Gore. What the ****? I’m serious. WHAT THE ****?

Oh, and I just took a job in Boston.
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Jeff:

They ruined any chance at having a legitimate argument about Ballghazi by getting completely destroyed in the AFC Championship game.

They weren’t even the favorite team in the state until Peyton Manning’s second or third year (most people still rooted for the Bears).
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Brad:

Because there are ******** still showing up to games wearing Manning Broncos jerseys. Because our owner is a pill-popping billionaire that’s too goddamn stupid to hire a driver to haul his opiate-riddled *** around. Because we’ll win 12 games, mostly because we play in a division full of Mongoloids, and we’ll still have to go play in Foxboro where we’ll lose by 50 points as we always do.
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Joseph:

90% of Colts fans defended Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson. That same group responded to Tom Brady deflating some balls in a game the Colts lost 500 to 0 by wondering what kind of example Roger Goodell was making for the kids if Tom Brady and Co. didn’t have to forfeit the game and get thrown in a Russian jail for the rest of their lives.

In case you want some more info about Indiana, here are pretty much the only things people in Indiana are known for:

Creating the KKK

Thinking Bob Knight is an amazing coach even though he strangled his players

Banning gays from eating pizza
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Eric:

Do people not remember losing to the Patriots by a combined total of 87-27 last year? NBC is gonna show a dozen fat humps in $40 deflated football hats during the fourth quarter of another bloodbath in week 5. It will be a gif on this website within minutes, it will be embarrassing, and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.

Also, **** Mike Vanderjagt with a Shake Weight.
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Andrew:

Last year we got blown the hell out by Jonas ******* Gray. By the start of the 3rd QTR, I witnessed a fist fight in the restroom that stemmed from an argument over Jim Caldwell and how good of a coach he was. One Colts fan sucker punched another Colts fan WHILE HE WAS MID STREAM over a former head coach. Then, within 5 min I walked back to our spot and walked straight into a Colts/Pats fans brawl that resulted in bloodshed and pepper spray right in front of the handicap seating area. The only thing that helped me sleep that week was the visual of that Pats fan being carried out with a broken nose/bloody face.

We’ll go 5-0 to start the season, then we’ll get rawdogged by Tommy SmallBalls when he comes back in week 6. Then we will finish the season at 13-3 and lose in the Super Bowl because we deserve heartbreak. We are spoiled, overly confident *** holes.

**** Reggie Wayne (until he retires a Colt), **** the Pats, and still **** Hank Baskett
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Never would I have thought I would want to slap the **** out of two Dario's in my lifetime. Go figure
 
Rolaholic said:
Here we go again :rofl: :rofl:
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DYING :rofl:

love this one:

Joseph:

90% of Colts fans defended Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson. That same group responded to Tom Brady deflating some balls in a game the Colts lost 500 to 0 by wondering what kind of example Roger Goodell was making for the kids if Tom Brady and Co. didn’t have to forfeit the game and get thrown in a Russian jail for the rest of their lives.

In case you want some more info about Indiana, here are pretty much the only things people in Indiana are known for:

Creating the KKK

Thinking Bob Knight is an amazing coach even though he strangled his players

Banning gays from eating pizza
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Chester McFloppy said:
 
Elpablo21 said:
Never would I have thought I would want to slap the **** out of two Dario's in my lifetime. Go figure
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Three if you count both of the actors.
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So the fans defended AP and Ray Rice but are also white trash racists? Are the same insults juts used for 80% of the teams? Lazy and getting less funny with each team
 
dmxfury said:
So the fans defended AP and Ray Rice but are also white trash racists?
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nah that logic doesn't work, DMX. cause Boston, as you've surely heard, is the BIGGEST racist town in America. despite the fact that we have non white players that are loved. can't have it both ways (not you, but that type of logic)

not sure if that made sense :lol:
 
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Ah yes. Also, did Indy fan really defend AP or RR? What's the connection? Why would they do that? Shouldn't they hate Rice since he played for Balt?
 
dmxfury said:
Ah yes. Also, did Indy fan really defend AP or RR? What's the connection? Why would they do that? Shouldn't they hate Rice since he played for Balt?
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i assume he means more like, took their side versus Goodell in those cases? i dunno :lol:
 
dmxfury said:
So the fans defended AP and Ray Rice but are also white trash racists? Are the same insults juts used for 80% of the teams? Lazy and getting less funny with each team
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He's a funny guy but at this point I only read the fan portion of the articles. Or if the team of that day had a truly ****** off-season.

The 'Skins and the 49ers ones this year were hilarious.
 
This was a part of the NFL's plans the entire time, since New England won the Super Bowl.

+ Suspend Brady for four games.

+ Knowing he will take it to court, causing an uproar from NFL fans and media.

+ NFL schedules New England v. Pittsburgh for the first game of the season.

+ Media talks about Brady and Deflategate ALL offseason.

+ Brady wins case, not suspended for first four games, or first game of the year.

+ Brady playing in first game after controversy in addition to it being the first game of the season = Ratings through the roof.

+ NFL wins.

laugh.gif
 
TVobach said:
This was a part of the NFL's plans the entire time, since New England won the Super Bowl.

+ Suspend Brady for four games.
+ Knowing he will take it to court, causing an uproar from NFL fans and media.
+ NFL schedules New England v. Pittsburgh for the first game of the season.
+ Media talks about Brady and Deflategate ALL offseason.
+ Brady wins case, not suspended for first four games, or first game of the year.
+ Brady playing in first game after controversy in addition to it being the first game of the season = Ratings through the roof.
+ NFL wins.

View media item 1698345

:lol:
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Alonzo gif is needed. Someone please do the honors.
 
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