Anti - jokes

[jehlers02]

These got me rolling

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

A: Where's my tractor?

What's worse than a worm in your apple?

The holocaust.

Q: Why did the plane crash?
A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why was six afraid of seven?

It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

Q: Why are blonds so stupid?

A: Scientific studies have found no conclusive correlation between hair color and intelligence.

Q: What's brown and sticky?

--

A: A stick.

Q: What's red, and looks like a bucket?

--

A: A red bucket.

====

Q: What's green, and looks like a bucket?

--

A: A red bucket in disguise.

Why don't they sell pizza in the rainforest?

Because it's sparsely populated and it's not economically viable. (Seriously, who would buy it?)

Knock Knock

Who's There?

It's the Police. Your wife's been in a terrible accident.

What do you call a nun on a bicycle?

A cyclist.

Why can't Mike drive a bus?
Because Mike is a fish.

What's white and flies?Superfridge.

Many more on this site

http://www.reddit.com/r/A...ats_your_best_anti_joke/

 

[needsomejays]

wow, some of those had me

 

[jerome in the house]

What happened to the mailbox on a windy day?


It became someone elses mailbox

 

[tony ayooo]

 

[jehlers02]

What did the blind, deaf, and parapalegic kid get for christmas?

Cancer.


What did the bum get for christmas?

Nothing.

 

[xplicit213]

Why can't Mike drive a bus?
Because Mike is a fish.

 

[jerome in the house]

Why didn't drake bring the 12 year old bar mitzvah girl on stage?


Because you just can't gas her up like that man.

 

[bottom74bottom]

This thread is so my speed

 

[whywesteppin]

Originally Posted by Jehlers02

What did the blind, deaf, and parapalegic kid get for christmas?

Cancer.

So harsh but funny.

 

[chiefwiggum]

There is a joke thread

 

[cidman911]

 

[illmatic34]

These are my types of jokes

 

[fresh2deff]

for some reason i died at the red bucket one!

 

[snake201]

Originally Posted by ChiefWiggum

There is a joke thread

And this is the anti-joke thread...

 

[fenixconnexion.]

Why don't they sell pizza in the rainforest?

Because it's sparsely populated and it's not economically viable. (Seriously, who would buy it?)



Knock Knock

Who's There?

It's the Police. Your wife's been in a terrible accident.

 

[timcity2000]

^those were my two favorite as well, haha.

seriously, these were great... i haven't laughed that hard in a while.

 

[mycoldyourdone]

Lololol these are very gold

 

[jehlers02]

A priest and a rabbi are sitting on the plane next to each other. However, it's a very short flight and they don't talk to each other.


Two polar bears are chilling on an iceberg. One asks the other 'Can I push you off?' The other replies 'no.'

A man walks into a school and rapes a child. The child is emotionally scarred for life.

What's big and green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree?A pool table (or The Hulk).

 

[kiid23]

I put money these went above alot of peoples heads

 

[xx legod xx]

Knock Knock

Who's There?

It's the Police. Your wife's been in a terrible accident.

 

[Kev93]

 

[isitsafe]

Two men are sitting in a pub.

One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies:

"Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidise her drug habit."

---

 

[physicx]

i love these kinds of jokes

 

[hawkflight6]

Some of those were pretty good

 

[5am6oody72]

Your Mother has such great mass that she defies Einstein's Theory of Relativity, being that no matter how much her velocity increases, it is impossible for her mass to increase any further.