Anyone here aware or know someone with PTSD?

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What's up everyone, hope all is well.

Well, let me get straight to the point, I found out from my psychologist that I was diagnosed with PTSD. It comes from childhood traumas. A lot of things really trigger it and I realize that it has affected my social life and dating life significantly. All these years I've never once thought I had PTSD and it's a lot to process. I can't lie, it's making me worried as far as acceptance or people from the outside looking in to understand. It's sort of messing me up a little inside because I really am trying to cope with it, but it is very difficult.


Being picked on a lot growing up:

It puts my mind on edge thinking that everyone is against me and the world. Lots of built up anger, which causes me to not really like people because I be thinking they don’t have the best interest at heart.(flashbacks to childhood)



My mother being verbally abusive growing up:

Which is why I don’t argue or yell at people, it puts me in a dark place when people yell at me and I don’t receive whatever message is being brought to me.(Again, flashback’s from childhood)


People not accepting me for me/people trying to alter my personality:


This is a trauma because I always get told that I’m not really good at anything, which causes me to have low self esteem and low confidence.(Unfortunately, to this day) This is what causes me to have issues with dating and socializing. As you know, I’m a homebody, but it stems from childhood. I feel like being at home is the safest place where I’m not constantly judged or looked at funny. This is also why I don’t like crowds all that much. With me being 6’4”, I stand out. So, when I walk in a room, I be thinking people are making fun of me or saying very harmful things about me. Therefore, I always take longer route to avoid it.

This is probably the biggest one.. ☝️


Lastly, seeking validation from others about my image:

Growing up, my mom wasn’t really affectionate or rarely told us she loved us. So, as I got older, I always thought I didn’t look attractive. As we know, our parents are suppose to build us up at a young age to build ourselves up. In this case, it was the opposite for me. My mom never really told me I was handsome or try to build me up. It still sort of haunts me to this day. Not as bad as before, but it’s still there.


I just want to know if anyone has it, or knows someone that is diagnosed with it. How do you guys deal with it and cope with it? This is all new to me and i'm doing as much research on it. Despite feeling a little down, it is a little bit of weight lifted off my shoulders because it helps me understand why all these years I struggle with socializing and have high anxiety issues.

Mental health is nothing to ignore, but I just wanted to share this since it's been on my mind for a few weeks now. Sorry for the long posts.
 
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Is there anyone that doesn’t have PTSD?

Anywho Therapy + CBT will help you, maybe even in conjunction with a happy pill of some sort.

We all got childhood trauma’s fam. Some less than others, some that don’t even know what trauma is without saying it out loud.

My parents loved me but also did and said a lot of things that I don’t perpetuate with my own kids. In a way, they were living with their past traumas and no kids or person should have to deal with YOUR traumas.

You’re here now, you can’t unlearn this stuff. Get the proper professional help and DO THE WORK all day, every day. All we can control is ourselves and our reaction to things/triggers.
 
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Good thread. My most recent run in w/ pts was a massive head on collision. I mean massive. A suburban vs a Nissan Altima head on smh. I cried on the Uber ride back to my apt. It just hit me I was shook plus prob concussed. So thankful I was able to walk away from that.

Wasn’t sure how id feel drivin again afta that so what did I do? I researched safest rides and forgot all abt Volvo. Now it’s Volvo for life (word to Fenway pahk!)

So my advice is just research for ways to mitigate the anxiety. In my l case it was finding the best cah for my mind state. Your case it would be…wearing flip flops or somethin to not make yourself so tall. Maybe hit the gym etc if you’re tall and skinny, whateva you feel. Look up swinger sites and get laid if you really need it to give the confidence an old boost. Ish like that. Best wishes magne poeace

Go sox! The best!!!
 
Good thread. My most recent run in w/ pts was a massive head on collision. I mean massive. A suburban vs a Nissan Altima head on smh. I cried on the Uber ride back to my apt. It just hit me I was shook plus prob concussed. So thankful I was able to walk away from that.

Wasn’t sure how id feel drivin again afta that so what did I do? I researched safest rides and forgot all abt Volvo. Now it’s Volvo for life (word to Fenway pahk!)

So my advice is just research for ways to mitigate the anxiety. In my l case it was finding the best cah for my mind state. Your case it would be…wearing flip flops or somethin to not make yourself so tall. Maybe hit the gym etc if you’re tall and skinny, whateva you feel. Look up swinger sites and get laid if you really need it to give the confidence an old boost. Ish like that. Best wishes magne poeace

Go sox! The best!!!
Glad you’re doing well and it’s a blessing you were able to walk away from that major crash!
 
Good to hear you're getting help and are now piecing things together fdub fdub
Yeah, I just found out a few weeks ago, so this is all a process. I appreciate it, though. Deep down all the awkward questions and stand-offish is a lot of pain/anger. It’s good to know the cause off all this. I’m 35 and it’s about time I battle this demon once and for all.
 
great point

once u realize no one is perfect it can help you go easy on urself for whatevr u dealin with
For real. Had a caseload of 50+ veterans when I did chronically homeless. Most just wanted someone to talk to. Not about their diagnosis but just random stupid important stuff and I had all day.
Once they stopped talking like a victim, the more they smiled.
 
I think there's a spectrum and even micro traumas can cause some level of PTSD in people.

I feel like COVID probably caused quite a bit of trauma across the board, directly and indirectly which has led to a significant increase in PTSD.
 
in the behavioral field over 15 yrs. Don’t let these alphabet diagnoses get to you. We’re not perfect fam.
I'm not, but it definitely has changed my perspective of life and doing things differently.
 
Yeah I think a lot of professionals are too free with the diagnosis. As far as upbringing I feel it has to be acutely abusive, I don’t believe my mother didn’t tell me she loved me so I developed ptsd is right.
 
I remember a coworker telling me that she hit a deer on a road and ever since then, she can't drive down that road. I thought she was being dramatic until l saw (not hit) a wheelbarrow in the middle of a busy highway. The sheer shock and potential for danger had me shook for a few days.
 
Damn OP. Im glad I clicked this thread. Everything you described is what my wife has been dealing with to the T. Every single example. It has effected her greatly. She recently has been journaling and seeing a therapist and it has certainly helped her battle her past traumas. She has not been diagnosed with PTSD by her psychologist, but from what you typed out it's all very similar. All in all, the fact that you are even talking to someone about it is a great step, keeping it all in or trying to figure it out on your own can cause more harm. Hope your improvements continue my man!
 
Man if we are being honest, a LOT of us are still stuck in our child brains but just physically grew into adult bodies.

We all have things we need to address and deal with.

Hope you get all the healing you need man.

All Respects.
 
For real. Had a caseload of 50+ veterans when I did chronically homeless. Most just wanted someone to talk to. Not about their diagnosis but just random stupid important stuff and I had all day.
Once they stopped talking like a victim, the more they smiled.
A lot of people are in the world alone. like it can create a rabbit hole of problems so deep it’s unreal. And some people have problems like this that have been developing for decades so unraveling it is pretty much impossible.
 
how you doing op
I’m okay. I definitely feel better, but I have a lot of things to still work on. Just recently, I was talking to this chick and for some reason, I just lost interest(Dispute how overly attractive she was). I think it was because in the beginning I pretty much in a respectful way to told her that I got the vibe she wasn’t interested and she got upset and went on a rampage. Although, she apologized, I mentally noted that. That definitely brought back some PTSD in a sense of the verbal abuse. Made me think of it as if it was something that will be a continuance in the foreseeable future. We didn’t speak that long, but I already lost interest and will probably not respond to her anymore or talk her anymore. It’s just not worth it… If it was me 10-12 years ago, I would’ve probably continued to pursue her because of how attractive she is and her body lol. Not today! That’s growth lol.
 
I was diagnosed with PTSD after my wife died suddenly. I had nightmares of seeing her in the hospital and how she looked the day she died. She didn't look like my wife. She was so bloated and comatose due to the doctors trying to quell the hemorrhaging. I was also very paranoid about the safety of the rest of us. Every little thing rattled me. If the school called me, I was certain that one of my kids had died. I worried about every little thing because everything was ripped away from us so suddenly. I immediately went to my doctor and had them run every test they could so I could sleep knowing that I would still be around for my 4 kids.
 
Just an update, I’m getting better. I’m learning to express myself when someone says something that triggers me instead of internalize it.

I’m practicing walking tall instead of slouching.

Progress, just process lol


I need to get out the house more, though..
 
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I just did 2 years in county jail fighting my case. I was released on January 9th of this year. I was charged with a level 2 felony (minimum of 15 years with a maximum of 30 years) a level 3 felony ( minimum of 3 1/2 years with a maximum of 16 years) and a level 6 felony and an A Misdemeanor. I sat down for 15 months while I waited for the lab results of the drugs to come back and for my lawyer and prosecutor to work out a deal. My original plea was for 9 years with none suspended. The dealing charge was dropped because they didn’t have enough evidence to charge me for it (there was no C.I., no exchange for cash. I got pulled over for speeding and they searched the vehicle & found the work with some scales) I sat down for another 7 months before they came at me with a plea for argumentative sentencing with a cap of 5 years. I signed it and at my sentencing they suspended all of it accept for the time served because it was my first felony. The level 2 dealing & trafficking charge and the level 6 felony got dropped. I’m from Los Angeles and got caught in Indiana where I didn’t know a soul. Waking up everyday in a cell for 2 years and not knowing how much time I was going to get definitely gave me PTSD. My life as I knew it before getting locked up has completely changed and I’m still having trouble dealing with it but I have no plans on going back to that lifestyle. Everyday I’m battling demons.
 
I just did 2 years in county jail fighting my case. I was released on January 9th of this year. I was charged with a level 2 felony (minimum of 15 years with a maximum of 30 years) a level 3 felony ( minimum of 3 1/2 years with a maximum of 16 years) and a level 6 felony and an A Misdemeanor. I sat down for 15 months while I waited for the lab results of the drugs to come back and for my lawyer and prosecutor to work out a deal. My original plea was for 9 years with none suspended. The dealing charge was dropped because they didn’t have enough evidence to charge me for it (there was no C.I., no exchange for cash. I got pulled over for speeding and they searched the vehicle & found the work with some scales) I sat down for another 7 months before they came at me with a plea for argumentative sentencing with a cap of 5 years. I signed it and at my sentencing they suspended all of it accept for the time served because it was my first felony. The level 2 dealing & trafficking charge and the level 6 felony got dropped. I’m from Los Angeles and got caught in Indiana where I didn’t know a soul. Waking up everyday in a cell for 2 years and not knowing how much time I was going to get definitely gave me PTSD. My life as I knew it before getting locked up has completely changed and I’m still having trouble dealing with it but I have no plans on going back to that lifestyle. Everyday I’m battling demons.
Hang in there fam. If it’s available to you and affordable definitely try to see a therapist to work through it, it’s not easy and it ain’t a cure but it helps.
 
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