- Joined Apr 4, 2008
I just did this little exercise for my Creative Writing class, and I'm coming down from stone mountain so I figured I share. They're a paragraph each and it's a page total. Enjoy.
1. There's something about that place--an aura really, which could make you completely oblivious to how dingy it is in there. People are sneezing and coughing, pissing in bags and buckets, blood mixed in with stool--it's enough to get you a bed there. You don't notice that !*#@ though, when things going well. But when they're not...all you hear are a bunch of machines beeping and chirping that in succession sounds a lot like a horror movie theme. And it's funny, because you know it could two ways: your dad dies, or he stays alive long enough for a sequel two years later. Hell, you probably even start thinking about trilogy if things are going really well. But if the beeping goes statically, which it eventually does, and all you hear is the whishing of scrubs mixed in with the slicing of skin, you can't just help but to remember the time when he took you and your bastardized friend to the park to take batting practice and field ground balls...
2. I lost the key to the house, but it didn'tmatter--somebody forgot to lock the front door. I figured they may have lost their keys. I pushed the door open and shouted into the dark hallway my wife's name.I didn't hear any response, not even from the mice scuttling our aloe plant inthe kitchen, so I walked up the stairs. I figured I'd watch the shopping network for a little bit and letGregory's voice soothe me to sleep. Youknow, it's funny now that I think back to it, there was some mud on the stepsand I wiped it away with my handkerchief. But I forgot all about that after Ifelt the smell. It hit me harder than a kick to the ribs from by a trainedBrasilian jujitsuist. I tried to zero in on it, but my mouth was pulling me tomy daughter's room and my nose to the bathroom. I went to my daughter's room first because I thought the smell in thebathroom was from somebody taking a nasty %+@%. I opened her door and the firstthing I saw was a rainbow of bras on the floor. It looked like a bag ofSkittles. A little leprechaun told me,though, to look in her dress closet. So that's what I did, and that was when Isaw her laying on the floor with a zip-lock bag over her head and a shoelacearound her neck. I didn't even bother to take her pulse...her skin was whiterthan ivory. I walked down to the bathroom andI think I even tripped on the rug orsomething because it was all kicked up…I don’t know…Anyways, when I opened thatdoor, boss, that’s when I saw my wife with her head stuck in the toilet and%+@% sprayed out on the wall behind her. I didn’t know what to do…so I dialedyou.
3. He came to pick me up the night before our trip. He said, "This way we could leave straight from the doctor." I was too excited to being go to Newport, Rhode Island to care that my period was a few days late. "I want to have a really fancy dinner tomorrow night," he said, "something French." God, that made me so giddy that I didn't fall asleep until five AM. I was able to keep him up until four with chatter like our favorite movies and my favorite ring pop flavor. It was so cute. Finally when he went to bed I just nestled my head into his lap and watched an informercial for a juicer that was sponsored by that black that used to his own talk show. When i woke up the next morning he had already went out and got me a bagel--cream cheese and jelly on cinnamon-raisin. Mmm. After I ate it I showered. I decided to wear my white Jim Morrison t-shirt, you know the one that's the album cover for The Doors--by the way I saw Mila Kunis wearing that same exact shirt to the gas station. After I got dressed we left to go to the Rite-Aid down the block from your house to get a couple of Vitamin Waters and a tin of pringles. We had to go there before the doctor just in case we were running late. So we get there in like two minutes and I'm like running around the parking for no reason, just being a real doll. And then we get inside and grab the chips and drinks and put them down on the register. And while we're there he points to the candy and says, "Look, they have ringpops." I look at him say, "I wonder if they have watermelon," and then I remember that I forgot to buy a box of tampon...just in case. So I go, get them, he shudders because he's a little %%%*$%%, we pay, etc. We get there in like forty minutes, and our reservation wasn't for another hour, so we fooled around for a little bit. And then we got dressed and went out to dinner. I forgot my ID at the hotel so I couldn't drink any wine. He got snails, and I almost lost my appetite, and then we went back to the car and drove to the rocks, right by the lighthouse, and got out of the car and like walked for a little bit, and then he pretended to need help tying his shoe and when I bent down to give him a hand he held out a ringpop for me. "They didn't have any watermelon," he said, "but I figured cherry was okay since it's red."