I came out to my parents today....

Joined Jul 23, 2005
on august 1, 2010 i told my best friend that i was gay.  it's the first time those words had come out of my mouth except in front of a mirror.
today is july 31, 2011... almost a year to the day later, and i find myself in the same position.  this time at the kitchen table of my parents' house.  they're the last to know.

but it's time.

at the ripe age of 33, i've punished myself more than enough.  and then some.

the moment has played over and over in my head.  what will i say?  what will they say?  what will they do?

a lull in the conversation.  so i dig in and muster all the courage i can find.

"i wanted to talk to you guys about something...."

and then i just say it.

the words come out clumsily, heart pounding through my shirt, tears flooding my cheeks.

in the movies, there's always an orchestra playing at this moment.  it crescendos through the boy's last word lending strength to a quivering voice.

but not in my parents' kitchen.  just a groundswell of emotion.

questions.  confusion.  guilt.  sympathy.

and, ultimately... acceptance.  


i'd be lying if i said this post wasn't somewhat self-serving.  it's been an emotional day, and writing about it helps some.  there have been a lot of threads recently about homosexuality, ranging from the gay marriage debate to the civil rights comparison.  this isn't about that.  nor is it a request for approval.  i can only imagine there are people on this very board who have feelings they can't put a name to or don't quite understand.  please know that you are welcome to PM me anytime.  strictly confidential.

in the public arena, this forum could use an honest and frank discussion about homosexuality.  i'm not sure this thread is the vehicle for that, but recent events have brought the issue to the forefront.  how will you react when your son tells you he is gay? 
Joined Jul 31, 2011
Major props to you man! People dont seem to realize how hard this is on some people.
Joined Jul 10, 2010
It's good to hear that your parents were accepting, your relationship will most likely be stronger now.
Joined Mar 2, 2011
Congrats on being YOU. Worst thing in life IMO is living a fake one. Not being who you truly are.

Wish nothing but the best for you OP!
Joined Aug 4, 2005
Congrats man, I have a cousin who's gay and I'm proud as hell to be related to him. He did some work for the LGBTA society when he was in school. 
As for the discussion about homosexuality, I honestly could care less about a person's sexuality. Live and let live. They're sexuality has no affect on my life, so would should I treat them like it does. Everyone deserves a chance to be happy and everyone deserves to live the way they want to live.

Lastly, I want to commend you for this thread. It takes A LOT of courage and strength to reveal something so personal to a public forum of strangers. 

big j 33

Joined May 31, 2006
Good for you. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to finally come out to your family, much respect for finally doing it.
Joined Jul 31, 2011
Originally Posted by jeenewed

Good for you bro, but why have your parents be the last to know?
Im gonna guess and say its prob the hardest people in his life to tell.
Joined Dec 4, 2010
Props, glad that your parents are so accepting.

Question though: did they have any idea or suspicions you might be gay before you told them? Ive heard about cats coming out, only for their parents to laugh and say they've known for ears
Joined Jan 28, 2010

Madd Courage For Posting This On NT. 

Things Should Easen Up For You Mentally Now That You Dont Have Anything To Hide From Them... Good Luck With Everything.
Joined Dec 11, 2004
Congrats man, my cousin (whom i treat more like a big bro) came out to some of our immediate family (myself included) recently and we all accepted him with open arms and understood the struggle and pressure he went through. Regardless of who you are as a person, family should always to catch you and be first in accepting no matter what.

Without going into details, what my cousin did has dramatically changed my whole outlook towards homosexuality.

All the best, definitely a ton of weight taken off your shoulders.
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