NT, my brother passed away

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So my brother Tim has been in Maine for the past 14 months in a religious program. While there he became a born again Christian. Religion was never my thing but Im for whatever it takes to find god. You see the reason he was in Maine was because he had problems with drugs. He was living homeless in camden NJ, And Atlantic city. He did some slimy **** and my father said his only alternative is die on the street or go to Maine. He chose Maine. While living there I found out he was training to become a mentor for the younger kids dealing with addiction, and also all the amazing things he did while out there.

Fast forward to last week, He decided to come home to see family and stay at home for 2 weeks. WOW I have never seen him so healthy. The 3 days we spent together we played some spades , casino, had a BBQ and we even cleaned my own yard and I sat and watched him BEAST it, power washing, mowing, and chopping branches down. I saw he started to take his will back.

the first day he was asking me for new ports and sneaking away, since he quit for 14 months, I am seeing the progression of the disease of addiction and it started with the cigs. Then one night he went to the bar and had a few drinks , no big deal right? At least not to normal people. I think he was uncomfortable being around the same old stuff that was going on YEARS AGO. People still getting high , nothing ever changes. I had a amazing 3 days with my brother. On that 4th day, Memorial Day, I woke up and found my brother, dead. He overdosed. He found some knuckleheads that would get him what he wanted. Heroin. What I saw I do not want to describe, but it looked like a crime scene. THE progression is so serious for addicts, as it went from sneaking cigs, to drinking, to heroin. I don't know why god took him or why he chose to do what he did. I know who got him the stuff but that assault charge WILL NOT help my family. I have to be strong, as I'm the only son now . I just needed to vent.... The funeral is tommorow, as some of you might know, I had my problems with drugs, **** me and my brother used together back in the day. I think my brother wouldn't want me to be loaded at his funeral, as I have 6 months clean, being clean at his funeral can be my biggest honor.
 
wow man, sorry to hear that, it so sad how things changed so quickly,  stay strong man...
 
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Couldn't even imagine what it would be like to lose my brother. Stay strong fam, my PM is always open
 
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 Stay strong 
 
Sorry to hear that OP

My condolsences and may your brother RIP

and you're right no better way to honor your brother is to remain clean and carry on your sobriety in memory of him and for yourself

Keep your head up fam and stay strong
 
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Damn OP sorry to hear that. 

I have two brothers who both struggle with drugs...and I assume it's an ongoing battle. 
 
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Sorry for your loss fam', stay strong!
Praying for your brother, family, & you!
 
Sorry for your loss my dude. It's unfortunate that his story had to end this way. Stay strong.
 
Lost a couple family members in last year myself. Stay strong and ill keep ya in my prayers
 
stay up OP, don't go back and do something you'll regret, you worked hard to remain clean. sorry for your loss.
 
Sorry for your loss man. Thats really tough.

Man, heroin is the devil man. I see so many people who are clean on that crap for months, years OD once they get that fix again. Horrible life.
 
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