NT...whats the worst a girl has ever played you? vol. heres my story...

[bonafide hustla]

Originally Posted by doosta45

never leave the person you love for the person you like, because the person you like will leave you for the person they love

was this supposed to be helpful advice for the OP or ujust droppin quotes

 

[kix4kix]

Originally Posted by bonafide hustla

Originally Posted by doosta45

never leave the person you love for the person you like, because the person you like will leave you for the person they love

was this supposed to be helpful advice for the OP or u just droppin quotes

What are you talking about? It applies perfectly.

 

[bonafide hustla]

Originally Posted by kix4kix

Originally Posted by bonafide hustla

Originally Posted by doosta45

never leave the person you love for the person you like, because the person you like will leave you for the person they love

was this supposed to be helpful advice for the OP or u just droppin quotes

What are you talking about? It applies perfectly.

it applies to his girl maybe, but not him. thats not advice for him because thats clearly what he's seeing unfold before his eyes and thatquote is obviously what he's saying is messed up bout his chick. and if this is advice for him not to leave the "one he loves" that quote isirrelevant because this chick clearly cheated on him whilst raising his child

 

[jose cansec0]

for all of you saying get custody of your son... thats such an uphill battle its not funny.
basically, i would LOVE to get custody of my son but in all honesty shes a really good mom, so its gonna be atough one....

Prowler 23 wrote:

---

It is a very touchy situation because there is a seed involved , but if she was selfish enough to do this to you already once, trust me she'll do it again ( from personal experience, 2 different females ). You always have to keep in mind that you'll never be able to trust her again. Lets look at it how it really happen , Shes throwing away a 5 year relationship and sacrificed the relationship between you and your seed for a little puppy love, with a Guy with a pending Gun charge , ... Shes gonna bring this around your Child ????

Notice how you Dropped her completely and she came running back , not to get back together but in her mind subconciously she was thinking , why isnt he going crazy over me? attention *!$!# much ?

Females are like cats , you chase em and they run away , but what happens when you dont pay attention to the cat?

Man theres alot of fish in the Sea , and you can always keep a good standing relationship with your child, but quite frankly dont put your happiness 2nd to hers.

very,very,very nice advice.... i mean i know exactly what you mean. likethe past week i wasnt reallyy thinkin much about her, i would only call her to pick up my son or what not, wouldnt ask her anything about her or her new littletoy..she would basically try and sneak little stuff in like "oh ok well ill be by tomorrow to pick up my son, im sure my boyfriend wont have a problemwith it", just little stuff like that, i would just shrug it off.
just that damn phone call last night really threw me off...the man part of me is just like "damn son you really gotta man the hell up and just forgetabout this broad"....i cant really avoid her because obviously theres a seed involved...but as most said, at least i have my baby boy, and i just gottamove on, both for him and me...

Thanks for making this post Cansec0 this advise is helping me out too.
i knew there had to be someone on this damn board that was feelin my pain...

Originally Posted by ISRAEL5EKLA

this sounds pretty horrible but i will say when you're in a relationship for a long time you start to miss that brand new relationship feeling and thats what i think happened to your ex. sometimes there are people who are strong enough to know that what they have at home is more valuable than that brand new feeling and sometimes people aren't. i think youre girl is the latter and she was giving you excuses to give herself space to do her. now this may be going against the popular opinion of niketalk thats gonna tell you to move on but im gonna tell you that people make mistakes and that shes young and so are you and you have been together for a very long time. people youre age are JUST NOW getting into serious adult relationships. im not gonna say what she did is right but i will say i understand and that maybe you should sit down and try to have an adult conversation and try to figure out what made her even want to throw out 5 years and her child's father over some new dude figure out where you stand and if it can be salvaged then go from there.

i was somehwhat thinkin the same thing...but ehhhh man i dont know...you just dontdo that to someone you supposedly LOVE...

http://kb8-3qwick.u.yuku.com

 

[kb8 3qwick]

I have a question for the people who said that they have experienced similar situations. I know it probably differs for everybody, but did it take you guys along time to completely get over the person?

 

[prowler 23]

Originally Posted by kb8 3qwick

I have a question for the people who said that they have experienced similar situations. I know it probably differs for everybody, but did it take you guys a long time to completely get over the person?

the 1st relationship I experienced this with it took a while , I was with her for 5 yrs and I was young and didnt know how to handle certain things so i wouldsay about 3-4 months.

the 2nd relationship It was alot less , I was with her for 3 yrs and even though i had alot more love for her it was way quicker. From the time we broke up Ihad the " possibility " of getting back together in my head for about 24 days ( Dec. 1st - Dec. 24th ) , but after I figured out that I was justbeing a fool lol , I was back to my old self by New Years. Now im more happy than ive have been in months.

 

[treb2k5]

I found mine in the Smushcalade.

She said she was checking out his tattoos.

 

[prowler 23]

Originally Posted by jose cansec0

for all of you saying get custody of your son... thats such an uphill battle its not funny.

basically, i would LOVE to get custody of my son but in all honesty shes a really good mom, so its gonna be a tough one....

Prowler 23 wrote:

---

It is a very touchy situation because there is a seed involved , but if she was selfish enough to do this to you already once, trust me she'll do it again ( from personal experience, 2 different females ). You always have to keep in mind that you'll never be able to trust her again. Lets look at it how it really happen , Shes throwing away a 5 year relationship and sacrificed the relationship between you and your seed for a little puppy love, with a Guy with a pending Gun charge , ... Shes gonna bring this around your Child ????

Notice how you Dropped her completely and she came running back , not to get back together but in her mind subconciously she was thinking , why isnt he going crazy over me? attention *!$!# much ?

Females are like cats , you chase em and they run away , but what happens when you dont pay attention to the cat?

Man theres alot of fish in the Sea , and you can always keep a good standing relationship with your child, but quite frankly dont put your happiness 2nd to hers.

very,very,very nice advice.... i mean i know exactly what you mean. like the past week i wasnt reallyy thinkin much about her, i would only call her to pick up my son or what not, wouldnt ask her anything about her or her new little toy..she would basically try and sneak little stuff in like "oh ok well ill be by tomorrow to pick up my son, im sure my boyfriend wont have a problem with it", just little stuff like that, i would just shrug it off.
just that damn phone call last night really threw me off...the man part of me is just like "damn son you really gotta man the hell up and just forget about this broad"....i cant really avoid her because obviously theres a seed involved...but as most said, at least i have my baby boy, and i just gotta move on, both for him and me...




Its gonna take a little while to get over her , but you will .... having a good support system is great too , LikeClose friends , and males in your family . Just dont give her the satifaction knowing that you actually care. Keep her guessing. But always be there for yourchild.

 

[lifelessons]

Originally Posted by loonyrobert

Get custody of your son and forget her. Did it once, she'll do it again.

 

[datnggag]

People keep saying get custody of your son...There is no way in hell any judge is going to take the child away from the mother without just cause..All i haveto say is stay on good terms with the mother..make sure you take care of your son..and if your not on good terms that child support is gonna be a %!%%%..i knowhere in nyc its 17% i worked it out with my girl...Cause i realized that the things we broke up for was stupid...

 

[spot rusherz]

*Bookmarks*

 

[shoedinidc]

Take the L now and only once instead of forever....

 

[ericberry14]

Originally Posted by ISRAEL5EKLA

who ever wrote all that up there is dumb as rocks. Ole girl straight up dropped him because she had a new dude waitin for her. She threw away a 5 year relationship because of some new guy she was interested in, & you tellin him that he should get back with her. There is nothing to salvage, she just doesnt respect him or the fact that they have a child together.

If you follow the advice i quoted than i guarantee that the broad will do the same thing over & over again. Just dead all contact with her now so you can avoid all this nonsense later

I didnt write that but I agree with it thats why I quoted it.

To me, you sound like a quitter.


lol if you think that's quitting, then go ahead & call me a quitter. But if a broad you have a kid with left you for some other randomdude, there is no reason that you should enter back into a romantic relationship with her. The only relationship you should have with her is the minimal onebecause of the child, but even with that you dont need to ahve a relationship with her besides just arranging things for the child.

you the dude that girls break up with, then while yall broken up with have sex with a whole gang of dudes & do all kinds of whoreish things, and then theycome back to you wanting to settle down. but you go ahead and be that dude

 

[shortydoowopp]

ya'll been together since she was 14? she's 19 now...she probably just wants to live life and do her...let her go...if she comes back and you take herback thats on you...just be there for your son...

 

[zapatito007]

get ur son,, n cut this issh off right now dead it,, im telling u , dead it and keep it moving cuz i promise u will be dealing with this over and over againfor years to come and its gonna cost u endless headaches ,,

 

[shortydoowopp]

chances are he's not gettin his son...

 

[jose cansec0]

theres really no reason she wouldnt let me see my little guy, financially im there for him, and since those 2 and half weekswe've been split he's stayed with me for about a week, so im sure she wont have to go through the whole child support unless she really wanted to screwme over...
and yes spending time with close friends and fam does help alot...and to tell you the truth my mom's actually helped through this whole situation ALOT. Amothers love =

 

[dreaface]

i dont know why people keep on saying " get custody of your son" she'll still have to see him regardless... theres no avoiding your baby mamaunless you want out of your sons life. If you take it to court she will still have the right to see him which means she will have the right to see you. Sinceyou didnt mention anything like money issues and child support being an issue its best to be an adult about the sittuation and remain on good terms. If shes agood mom dont go through the drama of getting your son esp if you just started considering it because of this sittuation. Taking her to court is just going tocreate more strife which ur son is gonna witness and uplift ur sons life from something that he's use too. Its best to move on... it sucks but what can udo.

 

[shortydoowopp]

you should get the CS on paper just to cover yourself...you never know what a woman is capable of when she's mad...at least keep reciepts and good recordsof what you do...

 

[xiiz89]

Originally Posted by ISRAEL5EKLA

To me, you sound like a quitter.

@@%!*$++ she quit on him. She obviously proved she doesn't love him. That didn't happen overnight either, she lied for a while, and she left. F THAT

 

[haiti5]

eff that let her live her life crap..she shoulda kept her damn legs closed in the first place..but i think u need to leave her alone for awhile...jus see yourkid..

 

[hazeleyed honey]

I know exactly how you feel. My ex, I was with him for 5 and a half years, and he was my first everything. I found out last August through his mistress that hewas cheating on me with her for a year and a half. That day, the world was pulled under my feet, and I was depressed the following weeks. I would not eat, andI lost a bit of weight. He wanted to get back with me, but I refused. I think I am finally cutting him out for good. The ultimate betrayal, the lies, thedeceit...I just could not believe the man I saw as my partner, my best friend, my other half, could do something so selfish, so cunning, so evil. I am doing alot better. I am over him, but not completely over the situation, but that will come in no time.

My advice would be that for now you need space from her. Right now, the wound is still very fresh. If you keep being involved with her in deeper ways, thatwound will not heal. You will keep bringing it unto yourself to being so hung up on her. The more space from her, the more you will be able to heal and getover her. I know it will be hard since you have a son with her. But try to avoid her as much as you can, and talk to her just for purposes having to do withyour son. Please take care of yourself and your son. You seem as being very mature about all this and have a good head on your shoulders. You kept yourloyalty, your commitment, and did your part in it all. Instead, what does she do?She betrays you and stabs you in the back in one of the most demoralizing waysthat she can. Some couple do get back together after infidelity, and everything is rosy again and it all works out. So that option is still there for you, butthink about it all real hard...Can you ever trust her again? Can you ever kiss her, not thinking about the way she kissed him? Can you be intimate with her notthinking about how she was intimate with him? The lies, the deceit..everything. Is she worth it?Some couples try to work it out and it just does not work outat all because one partner just cannot get over the distrust and infidelity. How can you have a relationship with no trust? Trust is the foundation of arelationship. Trust me, it will be hard, very very very hard. But you will overcome it and only become a stronger and better person out of all this. You haveto sacrifice the pain for now where eventually she will not control your emotions anymore and you will be over her and what she did. Forgive in the sense thatyou have no more anger in you anymore or sadness over what happened, so this way she cannot control your feelings as I said. This will also take a lot of time.But, never forget. Just stick it out, those better days will come. Keep your head up.

 

[ncjamn]

Its definitely a tough situtation

It's not that easy to just "let her go"

What's the real reason she came back tho? Is it because the other dude aint feeling her anymore?

She needed change before. She's definitely going to do it again

 

[jose cansec0]

I know exactly how you feel. My ex, I was with him for 5 and a half years, and he was my first everything. I found out last August through his mistress that he was cheating on me with her for a year and a half. That day, the world was pulled under my feet, and I was depressed the following weeks. I would not eat, and I lost a bit of weight. He wanted to get back with me, but I refused. I think I am finally cutting him out for good. The ultimate betrayal, the lies, the deceit...I just could not believe the man I saw as my partner, my best friend, my other half, could do something so selfish, so cunning, so evil. I am doing a lot better. I am over him, but not completely over the situation, but that will come in no time.

My advice would be that for now you need space from her. Right now, the wound is still very fresh. If you keep being involved with her in deeper ways, that wound will not heal. You will keep bringing it unto yourself to being so hung up on her. The more space from her, the more you will be able to heal and get over her. I know it will be hard since you have a son with her. But try to avoid her as much as you can, and talk to her just for purposes having to do with your son. Please take care of yourself and your son. You seem as being very mature about all this and have a good head on your shoulders. You kept your loyalty, your commitment, and did your part in it all. Instead, what does she do?She betrays you and stabs you in the back in one of the most demoralizing ways that she can. Some couple do get back together after infidelity, and everything is rosy again and it all works out. So that option is still there for you, but think about it all real hard...Can you ever trust her again? Can you ever kiss her, not thinking about the way she kissed him? Can you be intimate with her not thinking about how she was intimate with him? The lies, the deceit..everything. Is she worth it?Some couples try to work it out and it just does not work out at all because one partner just cannot get over the distrust and infidelity. How can you have a relationship with no trust? Trust is the foundation of a relationship. Trust me, it will be hard, very very very hard. But you will overcome it and only become a stronger and better person out of all this. You have to sacrifice the pain for now where eventually she will not control your emotions anymore and you will be over her and what she did. Forgive in the sense that you have no more anger in you anymore or sadness over what happened, so this way she cannot control your feelings as I said. This will also take a lot of time. But, never forget. Just stick it out, those better days will come. Keep your head up.

Very well said, especially comin from a womans point of view..
i know in due time ill forget her, although it is gonna be hard considering im probably going to see her every other few days (my son)...
im no where near as depressed i was the first few days so i know ill get through it...

 

[jose cansec0]

What's the real reason she came back tho? Is it because the other dude aint feeling her anymore?
i doubt its cuz dude aint feelin her anymore, he's on thirst mode with her, talkin bout he wants to settledown and move in with her...smh
who knows why she came back? she probably still wants to have me there while she tries out this other guy but im not havin that.