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this guy knows what hes talking about
Ok, serious discussion....anyone here been with a girl who was sexually abused as a child?
this guy knows what hes talking about
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i swear every girl i try to get serious with has had something like that "happen" i put that in quotations because i rarely believe them
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- Apr 15, 2008
I messed with this girl that was molested by her dad from ages 10-15..She was weird in bed bout certain things...She had plenty of cuts going down her arm, and she would cry during sex, yet she was nympho...One drunk night i told her to call me "papi"....I was red on the inside.
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- Apr 25, 2005
This dude knows what he's talking about. Without going into details, I was with a girl who was previously abused. You always have to be aware of it, but NEVER mention it unless she brings it up. Don't ever verbally blame her emotions on the abuse, even if it's the case. Kind of like how you can't say, "You're just saying that because you're PMSing."
Like copped says, abuse victims can be very hot and cold. Like... they'll wanna smash all day one day and can literally start shaking if you even touch them the next day.
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Listen to this guy...
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IWS
general johnson
Banned
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Yeah, been there a couple of times. The thing both of them had in common was they put waaaaay too much emphasis on sex. I like to smash, a lot, but they took it to the extreme and both liked to be degraded in their own ways.
One wanted to be hit and enjoyed pain. She went out of her way to express her sexuality in the way she dressed and was down to do it anywhere, with anyone watching. She also liked attention from anyone who gave it to her.
The other one, she was just OD with the way she did things. Like she was making a "film" every time we got down. Not saying I didn't like it, but once I realized that was all she had to offer besides a lot of drama/instability, I was out.
One wanted to be hit and enjoyed pain. She went out of her way to express her sexuality in the way she dressed and was down to do it anywhere, with anyone watching. She also liked attention from anyone who gave it to her.
The other one, she was just OD with the way she did things. Like she was making a "film" every time we got down. Not saying I didn't like it, but once I realized that was all she had to offer besides a lot of drama/instability, I was out.
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- Jan 10, 2010
I didn't know NT'ers were so knowledgeable on rape victims. You're the one with this girl, just follow your feelings or whatever. Don't listen to these guys.
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- Apr 21, 2009
I've been with a few. They're usually really emotional. Some chicks are over it and some aren't.
Talbert
Talbert
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- Jun 5, 2006
I was dating this girl who had the same thing happen to her at about the same age. It was her Uncle that sexually abused her. She told her parents and the Dad didn't believe his brother would do that. Long story short she never really got over it completely, I felt bad for her because of that happening to her. You can't expect someone to go through something traumatic like that and ever be the same.
If it was me and we were just starting things out and I wanted to make life a bit easier on myself, I wouldn't be with her. With that in mind any relationship is going to have it's complications no matter if they were abused or not. If you already like her enough then you will be more inclined to feel sorry for her and probably stay with her. It's really going to depend on the type of person you are. Are you a fixer? If so you will probably try and stay with her thinking you can work through it and maybe fix it. You can't fix it though. If you tend to take the path of least resistance then you will cut ties and find another.
In my situation the girl was nice and all but she was a headcase. She would lie about weird stuff to get attention. She never got over it, I have been married for almost 8 years (to another woman) and she found my number through her work so she calls me at work to play games with me again. I told her to lose the number in a nice way so she didn't flip and commit suicide or something. She texts me like a year later and won't say who she is or how she got my cell number, I figured out who it was and called her employer to let them know. She probably hates me know, so I switched carriers, numbers and moved in case she tries to kill me. Kind of kidding but kind of not.
If it was me and we were just starting things out and I wanted to make life a bit easier on myself, I wouldn't be with her. With that in mind any relationship is going to have it's complications no matter if they were abused or not. If you already like her enough then you will be more inclined to feel sorry for her and probably stay with her. It's really going to depend on the type of person you are. Are you a fixer? If so you will probably try and stay with her thinking you can work through it and maybe fix it. You can't fix it though. If you tend to take the path of least resistance then you will cut ties and find another.
In my situation the girl was nice and all but she was a headcase. She would lie about weird stuff to get attention. She never got over it, I have been married for almost 8 years (to another woman) and she found my number through her work so she calls me at work to play games with me again. I told her to lose the number in a nice way so she didn't flip and commit suicide or something. She texts me like a year later and won't say who she is or how she got my cell number, I figured out who it was and called her employer to let them know. She probably hates me know, so I switched carriers, numbers and moved in case she tries to kill me. Kind of kidding but kind of not.