- Dec 27, 2014
I'm so sorry to hear brother...I know you and your fam are going through a lot right now. @aepps20 pretty much hit the nail on the head, I couldn't have said it any better. Just try to be there as much as you can for your father. Make as many good memories you can with him. I know it sounds easier said than done especially with the cognitive issues he's facing on top of the cancer but do the best you can. Like @aepps20 I feel no guilt with how I spent the last few months with my mom. Either my sister or I were with her for every appointment, scan, emergency visit, countless hours with her whenever she was inpatient, etc. From the moment we found out too my sister took it upon herself to sleep next to my mom at night since my mom had been sleeping alone ever since my dad passed. My sister caught covid in late November right around the time my mom went on hospice so I slept with her for the 10+ days my sister quarantined. I'm a very restless sleeper but that was probably the best sleep I've had in the 6 months my mom was sick. I would wake up in the middle of the night, turn over and see she was still breathing and a sense of relief would come over me and I was able to go back to sleep. I could go on and on with stories like that but I'm sure you get my point. Please don't beat yourself up over wishing you had let them know how much they meant to you or feeling like you took them for granted. It's only natural to feel like that, I still have those feelings sometimes but in the end I know my parents knew how much I loved them and that I did the very best I could with both of them. I hope you get to spend as much quality time with your father as possible brother, if I can do anything in my power to help let me know. I'm truly sorry to anyone in here who's been effected by this terrible disease.
Here's some wise words from my mom to put things in perspective for all of us
Thanks for sharing fam. Your words truly mean a lot. I'm so sorry for what you've had to endure, but it sounds like your mom was beyond blessed to have you (and your sister) by her side until the very end and that must be comforting in the face of something so horrific. I'm going to heed your advice and do my best to live in the present and make the best out of the remaining months the best I can.
Also I meant to hit you up because I didn't intend to high jack your thread, I just really wasn't sure where else to post. So my bad if it came off that way. Maybe NT needs an F Cancer thread if one already doesn't exist.