To the girl that pooped in my Honda

1,035
10
Joined
Feb 23, 2006
sorry if posted

http://newjersey.craigslist.org/mis/1163906336.html

" We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have everbeen on, but I am willing to look past that.

I thought we had chemistry sitting at Applebees sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Amstel Light. I really felt like there was a connectionthere. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.

At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don't feelbad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said "First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me" was meantto be funny, not offensive.

I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle'slap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don't think anyone wins 100% of the time. That's why they call it"gambling".

I'm the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bitbetter...like when you're not sitting on a heated leather seat.

What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber andless taxing on the digestive tract.

I await your call,
Tad

P.S. - If you !%+! yourself on purpose to end the evening early…touché…

  • Location: Hackettstown
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests "
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This is as good as the one I've read about a dude apologizing for flooding the rest room floor at a Best Buy because of his almighty #2. Dudes reallyhave interesting imagination.
 
all of those best of sound the same. funny yes, but the style is too similar
anyhow, never trust a fart
 
Originally Posted by jeyel

sorry if posted

http://newjersey.craigslist.org/mis/1163906336.html

" We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.

I thought we had chemistry sitting at Applebees sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Amstel Light. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.

At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don't feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said "First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me" was meant to be funny, not offensive.

I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle's lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don't think anyone wins 100% of the time. That's why they call it "gambling".

I'm the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better...like when you're not sitting on a heated leather seat.

What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.

I await your call,
Tad

P.S. - If you !%+! yourself on purpose to end the evening early…touché…

  • Location: Hackettstown
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests "
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Tooooo funny
and its even better that its in New Jersey, lol
 
This reminds me a story from my first year in college.

RA left town for the weekend. We had a big party in the suite. RA comes back the next morning. I see him coming in as I'm walking to the bathroom.Conversation ensues.

RA: Wow, it's a mess in here.
Me: Yeah.
RA: What is that smell?
Me: I don't know, it does smell though.
RA: It smells like $@#*.
Me: It does!
*RA checks around the room*
RA: Somebody took a $@#* on this backpack!
Me:
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RA: I'm throwing it outside. I hope nobody wanted that backpack.

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damn anybody know where to find that best buy one or any others? This gave me a pretty good laugh.
 
Originally Posted by jeyel

sorry if posted

http://newjersey.craigslist.org/mis/1163906336.html

" We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.

I thought we had chemistry sitting at Applebees sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Amstel Light. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.

At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don't feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said "First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me" was meant to be funny, not offensive.

I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle's lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don't think anyone wins 100% of the time. That's why they call it "gambling".

I'm the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better...like when you're not sitting on a heated leather seat.

What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.

I await your call,
Tad

P.S. - If you !%+! yourself on purpose to end the evening early…touché…

  • Location: Hackettstown
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests "
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