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i crop dust or ill just excuse myself and go to the utility closet
Farting Etiquette at Work
- Thread in 'General' Thread starter Started by you go boy,
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My coworkers were ruthless, they use to have farting competitions in the office. One time, my coworker went over to my other mans cubicle, turned around, bent down wild quick and grabbed his ankles and let it rip right in his face.
Later on that day, son that got farted on went over to the guy's cubicle, ran and layed down on his back on his desk (infront of his face) pulled both legs back behind his head and let it rip right in his mouf
**** started to get outta hand when females coworkers started getting in on it too. One of the newer coworkers came to one cats cubicle, jumped in the air and landed in a split. As she landed, she let out 2 loud rips. The nasty part was that when she got up, there was a brown stain on the carpet where she landed.
Last incident before I left that job was when one dude went all out. Son waited for the other around the corner. He knew he was going to make that turn in the office, so he stood up on his desk, pants and underwear down, crouched down so the guy walking couldn't see him. When son turned around the corner, booty boy spread his cheeks and let out the loudest gassiest funkiest fart right in sons face.
Later on that day, son that got farted on went over to the guy's cubicle, ran and layed down on his back on his desk (infront of his face) pulled both legs back behind his head and let it rip right in his mouf
**** started to get outta hand when females coworkers started getting in on it too. One of the newer coworkers came to one cats cubicle, jumped in the air and landed in a split. As she landed, she let out 2 loud rips. The nasty part was that when she got up, there was a brown stain on the carpet where she landed.
Last incident before I left that job was when one dude went all out. Son waited for the other around the corner. He knew he was going to make that turn in the office, so he stood up on his desk, pants and underwear down, crouched down so the guy walking couldn't see him. When son turned around the corner, booty boy spread his cheeks and let out the loudest gassiest funkiest fart right in sons face.
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what kind of a person are you to be offended by a fart at the urinal?
you probably should sit down when you pee
LIke I said it is polite to go in the stall and do that. I think it is disrespectful farting around random people like its all good. The same way you don't fart everywhere you go, and around everyone you meet. If you are by yourself and let it rip so what, but if I'm near you have the respect to hold it.
Let me know how you feel if a dude just stands next to you and lets one rip loud as hell.
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I remember I once at work I farted on a kid by mistake who was at eye level with my butt. Must of been terrible for him.
Felt kinda bad after, it just slipped out.
Felt kinda bad after, it just slipped out.
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I've been fortunate enough to work mostly in food service and nursing. I let farts rip all the time at work and no one's the wiser.
Not a work story, but definitely my best fart story: me and my friends used to steal spicy chicken sandwiches from the school cafeteria for sport when we were in high school. One day I was able to steal 3 of them, all of which were eaten by me. I had orchestra next period. I played bass, so I was able to lurk in the back. While we were playing I let a fart loose, but as soon as I let it go I knew it was gonna be a fart for the ages. You can generally tell how bad a fart is gonna smell by how hot it feels when it comes out of your ***, and this one was a scorcher. Five seconds later three kids in the row in front of me start gagging. Next thing I know the stank is spreading like wildfire and the cello and viola players are starting to feel the wrath of those spicy chicken sandwiches. The whole class had to stop playing until the smell went away. No one ever pointed the finger at me, but I was chilling in the back looking like
Not a work story, but definitely my best fart story: me and my friends used to steal spicy chicken sandwiches from the school cafeteria for sport when we were in high school. One day I was able to steal 3 of them, all of which were eaten by me. I had orchestra next period. I played bass, so I was able to lurk in the back. While we were playing I let a fart loose, but as soon as I let it go I knew it was gonna be a fart for the ages. You can generally tell how bad a fart is gonna smell by how hot it feels when it comes out of your ***, and this one was a scorcher. Five seconds later three kids in the row in front of me start gagging. Next thing I know the stank is spreading like wildfire and the cello and viola players are starting to feel the wrath of those spicy chicken sandwiches. The whole class had to stop playing until the smell went away. No one ever pointed the finger at me, but I was chilling in the back looking like
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Depends on the type of fart..
SBD:
Find a coworker your not to fond of. Go to their cubical, chop it up a bit. Find something in the cubical, like a picture or do-dad, that can give you an excuse to walk into the cubical. While you're in the cubical, let'er rip. End the convo and let the co worker bask in the gift of your essance.
Bangers:
Wait till the office is at its quitest. Let'er rip! The louder the better.
Claim nothing. Regret nothing. Enjoy it all.
SBD:
Find a coworker your not to fond of. Go to their cubical, chop it up a bit. Find something in the cubical, like a picture or do-dad, that can give you an excuse to walk into the cubical. While you're in the cubical, let'er rip. End the convo and let the co worker bask in the gift of your essance.
Bangers:
Wait till the office is at its quitest. Let'er rip! The louder the better.
Claim nothing. Regret nothing. Enjoy it all.
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Exact same thing happened to me in the break room a few years ago. The coast was clear before i ripped, but chick boomed in as soon as I let loose. I tried to warn her, but she persisted... She went from why? to oh
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I don't care how old I am will be, farts will forever be funny to me. Even when I fart alone, I laugh. Like farting is the funniest thing ever. I give no dambs at work when I fart. I usually announce it too, just because I never want to be the guilty one when someone does fart and it smells so bad and it wasn't really me.
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You ain't gotta lie to kick it.
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I thought the unwritten man law was you're only allowed to have a conversation with someone in the bathroom if you're doing the same thing.
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what kind of a person are you to be offended by a fart at the urinal?
you probably should sit down when you pee
I swear I was reading that with the confused face. Son wants people to reserve a hotel room to let one rip.
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Yall ever have to fart in the process of dropping a girl off, and as soon as she closes that door and takes 2 steps, you let out the meanest nastiest dynamite ever, and then seeing her rushing back to the car cuz she probably forgot something, so you just book it hoping the trail of fart doesn't escape the window crack?
Cuz I did
Cuz I did
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Funny but 100% lies
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how loud are your farts / how small is your office for you guys to be hearing farts?
if i have to fart i usually just open a few drawers and close them like im looking for something but my workplace gives us enough space between each other where i can just fart and it wont be that audible to others unless they're either really close to my cube or it's a really loud fart
if i have to fart i usually just open a few drawers and close them like im looking for something but my workplace gives us enough space between each other where i can just fart and it wont be that audible to others unless they're either really close to my cube or it's a really loud fart
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What can you do you not fart at a urinal? Your body has to relax those muscles to let out the urine
I usually feel one about to rip but I try my best to not let it come out loudly.
I work in a bus depot and these dudes are savages. They be taking a dump while legit talking to another dude who taking a leak or washing his hands.
Man, when I worked at Lowes all the old dudes used to have like 10 minute conversations while sitting on the toilet. Like, "How's your family Ray?"
In high school, I would go to the pencil sharpener and use it to mask the sound of my fart. One day I put the pencil in and let it rip but the sharpener was unplugged. Everybody heard me
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Let em rip, have my own office though..
..but when people walk in right after I let one loose :x
..but when people walk in right after I let one loose
:xBruce Banner
formerly jetsetkev
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Been eating a lot of boiled eggs at least a dozen , I let it rip in class and at work lol those silent deadly ones too smh I was driving the other day I let loose in this 86 degree weather had to crank the AC up .
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There is none at my job. Let 'er rip tater chip
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Those "I thought I was alone" moments are killer lmao
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let them out slowly and quietly. that's the only way
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this just shows none of y'all are bosses if you wondering about offending a co-WORKER with your GAS...
BOSS UP NT...and you can be in control of your own farts....
BOSS UP NT...and you can be in control of your own farts....
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