Official mental health and group therapy thread. Get it off your chest

[mjgreatxii]

You gotta let go of the past fam. As hard as it is, you just gotta do it. Trust me, I know what it's like to sit there night after night hoping things would turn around. Right now all you're thinking about is what if used to be instead of seeing it for what it is now. Like I said man, you gotta stop living in the past. Especially when she isn't.

You're right man.. she isn't.. It's just lame cuz I moved out here for her. we've been through so much, and to just throw it all away would seem like everything I did in the last 3.5 years wouldn't have mattered.

I went to the gym today, helped a lot while i was there, second I got back to my place I got all sad

 

[powerballin]

Wasn't gonna but **** it.

This next part introduces the issue. No humble brags. Got a nice body, attractive, great personality, the world going for me.......but. suffer from PE. Don't want to type it all out because of how shameful I am of it. You might think... that's it? But it stems from a lot of other **** mentally and affects more aspects of my life than you can imagine.

Ruins any chance of a relationship I may have because in my head I am already doubting myself and thinking the worst.

Reallllllllllly messed me up recently. Confidence levels, not wanting to meet new people, over thinking, anxiety, stress.

Already thinking of how it could **** up my marriage and I ain't even close to that.

I feel like it's the ONE thing holding me back from being exactly where I want to be in life. I feel like over coming the issue will cause a chain reaction to every thing else. It's the one thing I need to validate myself, my confidence, and make me who I want to be...

What's said in this thread stays in this thread right?

iLLest!

Have you seeked professional or medical help?

 

[iblink]

I'll keep it real. You're in for a lot of nights like that. When you're out in the world, you have distractors taking your mind off of your current predicament. But once you open those doors to your place, you're reminded that you're there alone. It sucks. It's going to suck for a while. But the day will come where you look back at this time and shake your head at yourself. Might even laugh a little.

See the thing is this: they always come back. In your predicent, I can guarantee this. Mark my words, the day will come when the sorority life will lose its luster and she will want to fall back on what you all had. Like I said, with the way things are now, she knows she's got you to the point where she could do what she pleases only to dust you off the shelf when she's ready. Not saying anything bad about her as an individual, but that's how people are. They will do things when they know they can get away with it.

Ultimately, you're the only one that can turn the tables around. It's possible. Trust me. It will take time, but time's gonna go by regardless. You're already not spending that time with her, so you have to decide whether you'd rather spend it tearing yourself apart over her, or actively trying to chane your situation.

Good luck man.

 

[mjgreatxii]

I'll keep it real. You're in for a lot of nights like that. When you're out in the world, you have distractors taking your mind off of your current predicament. But once you open those doors to your place, you're reminded that you're there alone. It sucks. It's going to suck for a while. But the day will come where you look back at this time and shake your head at yourself. Might even laugh a little.
See the thing is this: they always come back. In your predicent, I can guarantee this. Mark my words, the day will come when the sorority life will lose its luster and she will want to fall back on what you all had. Like I said, with the way things are now, she knows she's got you to the point where she could do what she pleases only to dust you off the shelf when she's ready. Not saying anything bad about her as an individual, but that's how people are. They will do things when they know they can get away with it.
Ultimately, you're the only one that can turn the tables around. It's possible. Trust me. It will take time, but time's gonna go by regardless. You're already not spending that time with her, so you have to decide whether you'd rather spend it tearing yourself apart over her, or actively trying to chane your situation.
Good luck man.

How exactly would I turn the tables on her?
Do my own thing. Get my *** in shape. Talk to girls and just not rely on her right?

I appreciate all your help and support man.

 

[swendro]

If you all want reading material on a certain issue I suggest visiting

http://www.psychologytoday.com/

Great source of information. Lots of articles on pretty much every topic.

 

[iblink]

Well first you gotta realize that any changes you make have to be for you, not for her or for the hopes of getting her back. It's less about turning the tables on her and more about you turning things around FOR yourself. Told you earlier, you gotta open up to the thought of finding happiness outside of that relationship. Anything short of doing this will ensure that you remain right where you are, no matter what you convince yourself. You can sleep with a hundred girls. Bad ******* as that. I guarantee sorority girl will be the first thing you think about when afterwards.

You turn the tables by realizing that "yeah, this sucks, but it's not the end of the world". There's happiness out there man. Do things YOU like to do or new things you would like to try out. Not going to tell you to go jump in the sack with random broads, because that's only a temporary fix.

You said you're new to the city of LA right? Hell, get out there. I'm sure there's **** out there you like. Hang out in places you enjoy. You'll inevitably get to know people who share some of your interests. Make a few friends. Whether it be a couple dudes you play basket ball or soccer with, or a chick you can talk comics with, or an 80 year old man who doesn't want to hit the gym alone. as it is, you gotta be open to the differet ideas that are out there. You'll be surprised how easy it is to meet new people when you go to the right places.

But it's no problem to help out bruh. I've had my share of lows. Whenever I posted on NT, there were always people willing to help me out. So when I can return the favor, I do it. Especially when someone's going through something similar as what I dealt with.

 

[mjgreatxii]

Well first you gotta realize that any changes you make have to be for you, not for her or for the hopes of getting her back. It's less about turning the tables on her and more about you turning things around FOR yourself. Told you earlier, you gotta open up to the thought of finding happiness outside of that relationship. Anything short of doing this will ensure that you remain right where you are, no matter what you convince yourself. You can sleep with a hundred girls. Bad ******* as that. I guarantee sorority girl will be the first thing you think about when afterwards.
You turn the tables by realizing that "yeah, this sucks, but it's not the end of the world". There's happiness out there man. Do things YOU like to do or new things you would like to try out. Not going to tell you to go jump in the sack with random broads, because that's only a temporary fix.
You said you're new to the city of LA right? Hell, get out there. I'm sure there's **** out there you like. Hang out in places you enjoy. You'll inevitably get to know people who share some of your interests. Make a few friends. Whether it be a couple dudes you play basket ball or soccer with, or a chick you can talk comics with, or an 80 year old man who doesn't want to hit the gym alone. as it is, you gotta be open to the differet ideas that are out there. You'll be surprised how easy it is to meet new people when you go to the right places.
But it's no problem to help out bruh. I've had my share of lows. Whenever I posted on NT, there were always people willing to help me out. So when I can return the favor, I do it. Especially when someone's going through something similar as what I dealt with.

Going to take this to heart and make changes man.
Again, thank you man. Means a lot to me.

 

[iblink]

No problem man. Hit me up via PM whenever.

 

[nocomment6]

I've almost killed myself before.. I forgot where I posted it but it was somewhere on NT.
If any of you ever get thoughts of doing it, I check NT every day and my PM box is open. No judging, real talk. I've been there and I know how it feels. Not worth it.
None of you are alone in anything.. NT Famb.

Came in to post pretty much the same.
Unfortunately I've had and have my lows, been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, luckily with not too many manic phases. I was self-destructive for a year, managed to get that in order somewhat, been okay for the past few months, but but it kind of looks like it may be downhill right now for a bit, because of certain decisions I have to make.

Like many said, NT is an amaying family and my inbox is always open to anyone!

 

[freeze]

Wasn't gonna but **** it.

This next part introduces the issue. No humble brags. Got a nice body, attractive, great personality, the world going for me.......but. suffer from PE. Don't want to type it all out because of how shameful I am of it. You might think... that's it? But it stems from a lot of other **** mentally and affects more aspects of my life than you can imagine.

Ruins any chance of a relationship I may have because in my head I am already doubting myself and thinking the worst.

Reallllllllllly messed me up recently. Confidence levels, not wanting to meet new people, over thinking, anxiety, stress.

Already thinking of how it could **** up my marriage and I ain't even close to that.

I feel like it's the ONE thing holding me back from being exactly where I want to be in life. I feel like over coming the issue will cause a chain reaction to every thing else. It's the one thing I need to validate myself, my confidence, and make me who I want to be...

What's said in this thread stays in this thread right?



iLLest!

have you tried any kegels? to increase pelvic strength? so when you get that feeling, you can just clamp down with the lower abdominal and hold it. It really is all in your head though. I know, thats what is always said, but for the most part, it's true. Maybe you're just not comfortable around women enough, that you get overly excited? It happens. The first step is just realizing that you're getting too 'ready' and adjusting to that. also, before you get with a female, for a quick fix, go rub one out in the bathroom. That first nut WILL betray you fam. So get rid of it. then all that baby batter will be off your brain, you'll be able to operate in a clear state of mind and actually focus on her and chilling and enjoying your time together instead of that fear of busting quick.

 

[freeze]

on a side note, I love this thread. I'm glad it was made.

 

[il prescelto]

tips on how to give less of a $#% in life? I feel like I care too much about what other people think of me, if I could not give any dambs at all I'd be so much better off.

also what's PE?

 

[n3rd]

tips on how to give less of a $#% in life? I feel like I care too much about what other people think of me, if I could not give any dambs at all I'd be so much better off.
also what's PE

I live in the same bizzaro bubble. What Imr ealizing is that its not that I care about what other people think of me, its my subconscious being so hard and judging me that I've paralyzed myself.

No one "cares" about me that much to be so concerned with my actions...and even if they are why am I putting them on a pedestal?

I need to take a leap of faith.....why won't/can't I? Why can't I follow the same advice that I give to someone else? Somehow it doesn't "apply" to me. I assign things that don't apply to me, to myself, as well as the inverse.

 

[n3rd]

tips on how to give less of a $#% in life? I feel like I care too much about what other people think of me, if I could not give any dambs at all I'd be so much better off.
also what's PE

I live in the same bizzaro bubble. What Imr ealizing is that its not that I care about what other people think of me, its my subconscious being so hard and judging me that I've paralyzed myself.

No one "cares" about me that much to be so concerned with my actions...and even if they are why am I putting them on a pedestal?

 

[will0827]

Im in a bad situation right now with my fam and i cant deal with the letdowns anymore. Every single day something new happens or more ignorant bs and it has been for a while putting a strain and stress on my life. The main problem is the major lack of financial responsibility, at times i become like a bank and nothing is ever corrected just more and more debt, thankfully ive been able to have my finances straight even with the small amount i make. My mom and grand mother look at me still as a kid and i will take some of the blame for that with times i joke around and act a little less serious but when issues happen and i voice my opinion im either being disrespectful or theres no time to hear out what i got to say. Ive thought about moving on my own for so long now but everytime the fear of things falling apart without me takes over and prevents from actually going through with it. But my patience is wearing and a situation that has occured recently really is putting me over the edge. I put to much blame and worry on myself for their mistakes and i know deep down inside their ignorance and egos and stupid behavior will never change. Regardless i will love them cause their my fam but i need to build it up and move out.

 

[il prescelto]

I live in the same bizzaro bubble. What Imr ealizing is that its not that I care about what other people think of me, its my subconscious being so hard and judging me that I've paralyzed myself.
No one "cares" about me that much to be so concerned with my actions...and even if they are why am I putting them on a pedestal?

dude... same! like I'm not consciously thinking "wow I wonder what that guy over there is going to think if I say this right now"...but for whatever reason I end up acting as if I really felt that. It's like I'm always holding myself back and I don't know how to just let go.

 

[just reason]

I live in the same bizzaro bubble. What Imr ealizing is that its not that I care about what other people think of me, its my subconscious being so hard and judging me that I've paralyzed myself.
No one "cares" about me that much to be so concerned with my actions...and even if they are why am I putting them on a pedestal?

you are putting them on a pedestal because you are not comfortable with yourself. the first step to not caring about what others think of you is to be confident and comfortable with yourself.. find out who you are and what makes you happy and explore those notions.. society will be society no matter what and everybody will not like you..
to the dude with PE.. man it is all mental.. so start to become comfortable around the peak of arousal.. find a partner that you find comfortable and take steps to calming down through the process..

idc what people might say about joe budden.. he spits jewels.. and this line is one of his greatest..

"why try to fit in when you a standout"​

 

[riverdale road]

This is my life and it hasn't stopped in months i'm not sure what to do anymore i don't want to turn to taking pills

@ Rick pills would be the last thing I do. When I cut my life off for 3 months it got to the point where I wanted to die or get meds. I heard how they made u feel and I couldnt do it. I talked to a psycholoist and it made feel better. I suggest do that or ur girl or someone.

Also sent u a pm

 

[celticsfan9783]

tips on how to give less of a $#% in life? I feel like I care too much about what other people think of me, if I could not give any dambs at all I'd be so much better off.

also what's PE?

Would also like tips. Told my therapist I wish someone could hypnotize me to not give a damn Ala Peter in "Office Space." Had her laughing. I'm a chronic worrier. Always think I'm a disappointment in some shape. Constantly think I should be doing better and be more successful at this point in my life. Everyday feels like an uphill battle because of this mentality. It's also led to depression/anxiety.

As far as PE, could be one of two things:

Premature Ejaculation

Pectus Excavatum: a congenital chest wall deformity which makes the chest look "sunk in"

 

[darthdeezy]

Yeah, I suffer from panic attacks a lot.
I been on xanax for more than 16 yrs now.
Its gotten to the point where my anxiety has gotten me depressed and doc got me on 2 more meds for anti-depression.

 

[nocomment6]

you are putting them on a pedestal because you are not comfortable with yourself. the first step to not caring about what others think of you is to be confident and comfortable with yourself.. find out who you are and what makes you happy and explore those notions.. society will be society no matter what and everybody will not like you..
to the dude with PE.. man it is all mental.. so start to become comfortable around the peak of arousal.. find a partner that you find comfortable and take steps to calming down through the process..
idc what people might say about joe budden.. he spits jewels.. and this line is one of his greatest..

"why try to fit in when you a standout"​

well said. Probably building self confidence is one of the most important things, although it is pretty difficult since a lot of confidence is due to feedback from the outside world. It's hard, probably doing what you like the most and accepting the fact that if you put enough work into it, you'll be good at it. That's probably the turning point, when you know that you know more than others. That's when you start to forget about other standards, only yours. I don't like Picasso quotes, but:
“Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist.”
It's valid for everything in life in my opinion.

 

[sofa king awsm]

those with PE download and watch keni styles superman stamina. his method works.

get it from kickasstorrents.com and dl it now.

 

[fr3sh like ughh]

I have a gambling problem. I just gambled away 2,000 dollars today for no reason. I'm having a hard time just walking away from the table when down.

...sort of in the same boat, but how good does it feel when u win?!

when u win, u can't get enough and when u lose, you say "I'll never do this again"

.....in the span of the last month, I won over about 20K from sports betting....

....as of yesterday, I was left with 130$

....i can seriously laugh tho, and say it was great while it lasted(IMO keep ur "gambling money" aside from your "lifestyle money, NECESSITIES,ECT"

honestly, just learn from your mistakes, it's really an addiction full of hi's and lo's, you just need to learn not to get over your head and stay within your means(i've seen friends and family hurt)....trust me.

 

[eightynine-sx]

 

[sofa king awsm]

anyone here ever do Electroconvulsive therapy? read that it gives you back that nice serotonin level
dudes that are close to the edge should try that.

listened to a podcast today this suicidal woman (female comedian claire brosseau) did ECT. she felt liek she wanted to live again after like 3 weeks of treatment.this is after she tried all the other :x meds