How BAD is cheating, really? Could you get over it? Are you SURE?

[dearwinter219]

Cheating is one of the most demoralizing things you can do to another person. Period. I have zero tolerance for a cheater. I think it takes a really cold, vile, disgusting, vicious, and cold-hearted person to do that to someone else, especially to someone they claim is their true love.


Sweety, I think you have cheating confused with having an affair. Cheating isn't usually that deep. All it takes to cheat is a weak moral fiberand a few shots, no big whoop. Having an affair takes planning

. I could see myself forgiving a cheater under certain circumstances because I'mhuman and I'm not gonna put myself above any particular sin because I too have my "favorites", but I could potentially steal off a chick forhaving an affair on me, real talk. People make mistakes, but that's foul *%@!.

 

[yungmatt]

Originally Posted by Seymore CAKE

Honestly... once the trust is gone its GONE.

 

[kicks67]

With my girl for 8 years already

. i suprise my self that i havent fallen to temptation. But theitch is getting too hard to scratch. Why cant men and women just come to an understanding that life is way too short for one vagina. I dont know how long i cankeep up this fidelity bs.

freshhh wrote:

---

real talk ima sound like a jerk

but if i cheated, and i still wanted to be with the girl, id think eventually she'd forgive me

but if she was creepin, its a wrap.

i know its not fair, but thats just how it is for me i guess


Indeed!

 

[eltizzle]

Originally Posted by freshhh

real talk ima sound like a jerk

but if i cheated, and i still wanted to be with the girl, id think eventually she'd forgive me

but if she was creepin, its a wrap.

i know its not fair, but thats just how it is for me i guess

 

[hazeleyed honey]

Originally Posted by Infyrno23

Sorry to dissapoint you...
the perecntage of guys who are not gonna cheat on you.... is in the single digits.

i understand your point of view, he was your 1st everything.
You not gonna be able to have that, "if he cheats once he is always gonna be a cheater" attitude.... you will pass up on a good person that way.
People make mistakes, and it takes sometimes loosing someone to make them realize how bad they f'd up .......and if its real.... they will be scared out their minds to do it again, if they got a 2nd chance

so forgiveness is an option....for the right person

He was having an affair behind my back on and off with this one girl for a year and a half. That is more than a mistake.She is the one who calledme at work to tell me about it. He did not even have the balls to confess to me about it, because he is a coward. Ultimate betrayal.

I am too good for all of that $%$%+$*! and too good for him. He is not worth a second chance. After all I did for him and stuck by him,especially his demons..Idid not put up with him and all that just to be disrespected like that towards the end of it all. I am really hard trying to forgive him in order to get overit all. I get what you are saying...But, he did me really dirty, don't know if I can forgive him. I know I need to so that all I feel towards him and whathe did can subside so it does not control me anymore. I just have to find peace within myself first.

Edit: I shortened it because I typed too much and got carried away.

 

[dearwinter219]

^Aren't you Jax's exgirl?

 

[lifelessons]

Originally Posted by freshhh

real talk ima sound like a jerk

but if i cheated, and i still wanted to be with the girl, id think eventually she'd forgive me

but if she was creepin, its a wrap.

i know its not fair, but thats just how it is for me i guess

 

[nawth21]

Deal breaker for me. There is no reason to cheat. If the problems/issues in the relationship that would lead to cheating can't be fixed, then therelationship is over.

 

[hazeleyed honey]

Originally Posted by DearWinter219

^Aren't you Jax's exgirl?

No,I am not.

If I sound bitter, that is because this is a touchy feely and very sensitive subject to me.

To what you replied to me before about the difference between cheating vs. affair....I do not think I can put up with any type of cheating. Affair, drunkenone-night stands, cybering, etc, it is all cheating. It all falls under cheating except there are different levels of it. You are not supposed to be puttingyourself in those type of situations in the first place if you are in a committed relationship.

 

[dearwinter219]

Who says there has to be a problem that makes a man cheat? I think women see cheating as being the effect of some dire cause, whereas men see it as apotentially inevitable eventuality. So men NEVER trust women because we honestly don't trust ourselves.

 

[jthagreat]

postin to find later.

 

[nawth21]

Originally Posted by DearWinter219

Who says there has to be a problem that makes a man cheat? I think women see cheating as being the effect of some dire cause, whereas men see it as a potentially inevitable eventuality. So men NEVER trust women because we honestly don't trust ourselves.

Ok, well if there is no problem that leads to his actions and he just needs more than one girl or whatever he doesn't need to be in a committedrelationship in the first place, and then no cheating would occur.

 

[dearwinter219]

Originally Posted by Hazeleyed Honey

Originally Posted by DearWinter219

^Aren't you Jax's exgirl?

No,I am not.

If I sound bitter, that is because this is a touchy feely and very sensitive subject to me.

To what you replied to me before about the difference between cheating vs. affair....I do not think I can put up with any type of cheating. Affair, drunken one-night stands, cybering, etc, it is all cheating. It all falls under cheating except there are different levels of it. You are not supposed to be putting yourself in those type of situations in the first place if you are in a committed relationship.

Agreed. The question I'm posing is more or less asking if ppl actually know their tolerance level. Sure, we all claim to have a zero-tolerance policy but for instance (and some guys have spoken up on this) I kinda sorta know for a fact that Icould get away with getting caught....at least the first time. Now in no way whatsoever am I out doing %#%# like that, but I know how "lcoked in" mylady is and I can feel thqat if It came up, I could probably snake charm my way outta hot water. Could you? Honestly?And if you loved a man with all of your God given soul..... could he? Would you sacrifice your ideals to maintain yourreality is what I'm asking.

 

[dearwinter219]

Originally Posted by Nawth21

Originally Posted by DearWinter219

Who says there has to be a problem that makes a man cheat? I think women see cheating as being the effect of some dire cause, whereas men see it as a potentially inevitable eventuality. So men NEVER trust women because we honestly don't trust ourselves.

Ok, well if there is no problem that leads to his actions and he just needs more than one girl or whatever he doesn't need to be in a committed relationship in the first place, and then no cheating would occur.

But we all know how good cake tastes once you have it

. Ideally, I agree with you. Realistically though, I realize there are times when aperson may not want to lose what they have just to sample something they don't. Touchy subject Mrs. Nawth, eh??

 

[yungchamp]

Originally Posted by freshhh

real talk ima sound like a jerk

but if i cheated, and i still wanted to be with the girl, id think eventually she'd forgive me

but if she was creepin, its a wrap.

i know its not fair, but thats just how it is for me i guess

*THIS

Originally Posted by DearWinter219

Cheating is one of the most demoralizing things you can do to another person. Period. I have zero tolerance for a cheater. I think it takes a really cold, vile, disgusting, vicious, and cold-hearted person to do that to someone else, especially to someone they claim is their true love.

Sweety, I think you have cheating confused with having an affair. Cheating isn't usually that deep. All it takes to cheat is a weak moral fiber and a few shots, no big whoop. Having an affair takes planning

. I could see myself forgiving a cheater under certain circumstances because I'm human and I'm not gonna put myself above any particular sin because I too have my "favorites", but I could potentially steal off a chick for having an affair on me, real talk. People make mistakes, but that's foul *%@!.


damn man i never really thought about that....cheating and having a affair hmmmmm cheating i still wouldn't take her back but having a affair on me man itwould get ugly quickly

 

[trapmuzik617]

Originally Posted by freshhh

real talk ima sound like a jerk

but if i cheated, and i still wanted to be with the girl, id think eventually she'd forgive me

but if she was creepin, its a wrap.

i know its not fair, but thats just how it is for me i guess

This. Exactly this.

 

[nawth21]

Originally Posted by DearWinter219

Originally Posted by Nawth21

Originally Posted by DearWinter219

Who says there has to be a problem that makes a man cheat? I think women see cheating as being the effect of some dire cause, whereas men see it as a potentially inevitable eventuality. So men NEVER trust women because we honestly don't trust ourselves.

Ok, well if there is no problem that leads to his actions and he just needs more than one girl or whatever he doesn't need to be in a committed relationship in the first place, and then no cheating would occur.

But we all know how good cake tastes once you have it

. Ideally, I agree with you. Realistically though, I realize there are times when a person may not want to lose what they have just to sample something they don't. Touchy subject Mrs. Nawth, eh??

Naw I'm not one of those bitter women. I just don't see a reason for cheating.

 

[eight2one]

I get into relationships just to cheat!

 

[dearwinter219]

821, you continue to impress me for all the wrong reasons

 

[og_Rodney]

My woman and I agreed that if one of us cheats, it's over.

I'd get over it, but I wouldn't go back. Can't be disrespected like that.

 

[dearwinter219]

@ the thought of women making pre-arranged emotional responses. Good luck with that.

 

[superuntouchable]

Cheating is one of the most vile things that you can do to the one that you love. An affair is even worse because it involves emotional attachments andrequires quite a bit more deception. To be able to forgive that sort of betrayal takes a big heart, a strong soul and maybe a little something else that someof us don't have (IDK what it is tho). While I have been the betrayer and have been forgiven (but not taken back) before in my lifetime (these things notonly destroy relationships, they destroy families too), I am not sure that I would be able to do the same. This behavior can BREAK a person and knowing thepain that it causes, I for one, would never do it to ANYONE again. I sincerely regret what I did and like Infyrno said, sometimes it takes a person losing theperson they really love to see that they royally f'ed up. With all that said, I'm not really sure I could forgive someone who does it to me (Karma is a@#*#% ...) but because of the fact that I was forgiven, I would at least try...

 

[kidufc]

once you cheat and been forgiven, the relationship is never the same.. so why be in it?

 

[og_Rodney]

Originally Posted by DearWinter219

@ the thought of women making pre-arranged emotional responses. Good luck with that.

You're right, now that I think about it. I'm not really worried about it, though. If the temptation to cheat ever gets too strong, gotta cut it loose.

 

[prurientsole]

Cheating is absolutely awful.

To me, it's not even about the sex.

It's about the deceit, the lying, the total lack of respect.

If my girl just got drunk one night and *+%#+$ some dude, then immediately came to me and admitted that she *+%#+$ up, I could forgive her for that. Peoplemake mistakes, that's why there's a word for it. Now, I wouldn't take but one, maybe two, "mistakes", but still...

However, making a deliberate, calculated attempt to play someone for a chump isn't a mistake, and she'd be gone in a heartbeat with no regret if thatwere the case.