I need NT advice.

[amberelise04]

Since you guys don't like to read long stories, I'll cliff note this to the best of my ability.

• I asked off work 3 weeks ago for August 1 & 2. The lady who does the schedule but is NOT the boss said it was no problem and verified it with boss.
• Skip to last Thursday. I pick up my new staff shirt she tells me that I can't have my days off because she can't find anyone to cover the shifts
• I explain to the boss that it's going to cost me $$$ to cancel my hotel reservations in Nashville he says, "okay."
• The whole reason behind this trip is to see my "biological" father whom I've NEVER met before...my parents dropped this bombshell on me 3 weeks ago.

So, here's where I need advice:

1. Do I get over it, and just work the 12 hours Saturday and 16 hours Sunday
2. Demand that I get the days off considering I asked off in plenty of time prior to the trip
3. Just call in, and possibly take a write-up

 

[drsfinest72]

if i told dem in advance. & im in the union, i wont let anything stop me from my day off especially if i have reservations on my hotel.

but if u not in a union, dont risk getting fired.

 

[gberdin]

2

 

[amberelise04]

Originally Posted by drsfinest72

if i told dem in advance. & im in the union, i wont let anything stop me from my day off especially if i have reservations on my hotel.

but if u not in a union, dont risk getting fired.

Yeah, I'm more than likely just going to suck it up and work the shifts...

 

[drsfinest72]

Originally Posted by AmberElise04

Originally Posted by drsfinest72

if i told dem in advance. & im in the union, i wont let anything stop me from my day off especially if i have reservations on my hotel.

but if u not in a union, dont risk getting fired.

Yeah, I'm more than likely just going to suck it up and work the shifts...

yeah try to reschedule. and tell them how urgent is this for you.

 

[milestailsprowe]

Fly in and Fly back over your days off over a weekend. Just work the weeks cause this might cost you a job. DO that till you can get a week vacation AHEAD oftime and verified a month ahead. Plus I WANNA HEAR THIS STORY. PLEASE TELL

 

[amberelise04]

Originally Posted by milestailsprowe

Fly in and Fly back over your days off over a weekend. Just work the weeks cause this might cost you a job. DO that till you can get a week vacation AHEAD of time and verified a month ahead. Plus I WANNA HEAR THIS STORY. PLEASE TELL

I'll put it in a spoiler so the NTers who hate "novels" won't spazz on me lol.

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler [+]

Spoiler

About 3 weeks ago, my dad announced to us that we needed to have a family meeting...and my brother and I were required to be there, no excuses. That set off the alarms because that's never happened. A family meeting for us involves things like "updates" on what we're doing and such.
So, we're sitting at the kitchen table and my mom just starts crying. I'm looking at my brother (who is almost 1 and we're just lost as to what is going on. Then, my dad begins to speak. He says, "Your mother and I have been married 22 years..." okay so I'm honestly thinking they are about to announce they are getting a divorce. However, as he goes on he says, "There comes a point in time where you just can't take it anymore and you have to make the best decision."
At this point, I'm thinking he's quit his job and they are going to be strained financially in a few months....yet he CONTINUES with, "There have been lies told about our family, and truths told that we chose to hide over the years. He looked at my mom and he said, "Do I need to tell her...or do you?"
I remember I froze because I knew that whatever it was, it involved me directly. I looked back and forth between them and mom said, "I can't tell her."
My dad looks right at me and he says, "Amber...I'm not your biological father." My little brother got up, punched the wall and left...I sat there, tears streaming, telling myself I didn't hear what they had said.
My mom picked up from here and told me who my real father was, the circumstances concerning my birth, the adoption process for me to get my dad's last name...etc. Then, she tells me that over the years, my "fathers" family has kept up with me, sending me letters, requesting photos, etc. All this information has been dumped in my lap and it's like I've been punched.
I haven't even processed everything yet (I have a brother, severeal aunts, uncles, nephews, etc.) I just know that I'm extremely hurt by the fact that they hid this from me and my father/his family wanted to be in my life, yet she prevented them from it. I feel so betrayed...ugh now I'm crying again. I'm such a loser

Sorry for putting all that out there, but it kinda helps to write it out...

 

[infamousod]

tell them you're having an Antoine Fisher moment and it's an important life thing.

and if you break down and work like they ask you, at least get them to give you more paid vacation or something to compensate for screwing you this time.

 

[milestailsprowe]

Originally Posted by AmberElise04

Originally Posted by milestailsprowe

Fly in and Fly back over your days off over a weekend. Just work the weeks cause this might cost you a job. DO that till you can get a week vacation AHEAD of time and verified a month ahead. Plus I WANNA HEAR THIS STORY. PLEASE TELL

I'll put it in a spoiler so the NTers who hate "novels" won't spazz on me lol.

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler [+]

Spoiler

About 3 weeks ago, my dad announced to us that we needed to have a family meeting...and my brother and I were required to be there, no excuses. That set off the alarms because that's never happened. A family meeting for us involves things like "updates" on what we're doing and such.
So, we're sitting at the kitchen table and my mom just starts crying. I'm looking at my brother (who is almost 1 and we're just lost as to what is going on. Then, my dad begins to speak. He says, "Your mother and I have been married 22 years..." okay so I'm honestly thinking they are about to announce they are getting a divorce. However, as he goes on he says, "There comes a point in time where you just can't take it anymore and you have to make the best decision."
At this point, I'm thinking he's quit his job and they are going to be strained financially in a few months....yet he CONTINUES with, "There have been lies told about our family, and truths told that we chose to hide over the years. He looked at my mom and he said, "Do I need to tell her...or do you?"
I remember I froze because I knew that whatever it was, it involved me directly. I looked back and forth between them and mom said, "I can't tell her."
My dad looks right at me and he says, "Amber...I'm not your biological father." My little brother got up, punched the wall and left...I sat there, tears streaming, telling myself I didn't hear what they had said.
My mom picked up from here and told me who my real father was, the circumstances concerning my birth, the adoption process for me to get my dad's last name...etc. Then, she tells me that over the years, my "fathers" family has kept up with me, sending me letters, requesting photos, etc. All this information has been dumped in my lap and it's like I've been punched.
I haven't even processed everything yet (I have a brother, severeal aunts, uncles, nephews, etc.) I just know that I'm extremely hurt by the fact that they hid this from me and my father/his family wanted to be in my life, yet she prevented them from it. I feel so betrayed...ugh now I'm crying again. I'm such a loser

Sorry for putting all that out there, but it kinda helps to write it out...

Wait your mother had 2 kids with a man left got married and had you believe this man she married was your dad all around. She then blocked all interactions,letters, any attempt for you to have him in your life so she could have her dream life? That man is your real father but your mother did your biological oneDIRTY

 

[amberelise04]

^^ My little brother belongs to my dad that I've lived with for 23 years. I'm the one who doesn't.

 

[18key]

Honestly.... tell your manager that your going no matter what. You requested the time off and, here's the important part, you were told you could take thattime off. They should be able to handle one person missing for a couple days.
By the way, what kind of work are you in?

 

[amberelise04]

1. 911 Dispatcher ((This is the one I'm having trouble with letting me off))
2. Nursing Staff ((They've already verified the days off and it's fine...my shifts there are covered))

 

[thunderchunk69]

good luck with everything.

and yeah, I don't have the "correct" answer.

 

[soltheman]

Don't worry, beautiful. The sun will shine again.

And never take things for face value. Your mother may have had (or still does have,) a legitimate reason for shielding you for solong. I'm not saying your biological is a terrible man, but it might be the case. Just take care of yourself when you end up going.

 

[dirtylicious]

a full months notice and they're JUST letting you know?...
sounds like the woman let the notice sit for 3 weeks and then finally tried to ask someone to cover.

#2

 

[crumbs]

#2 if that fails # 3

 

[iansmk]

Nike - Just Do It.

 

[gnarmyroly]

Where do you work out of curiosity? But, I'd go with #2.

 

[dcortes23]

Originally Posted by AmberElise04

Originally Posted by drsfinest72

if i told dem in advance. & im in the union, i wont let anything stop me from my day off especially if i have reservations on my hotel.

but if u not in a union, dont risk getting fired.

Yeah, I'm more than likely just going to suck it up and work the shifts...

your going to suck it up and work the shifts? you haven't seen your biological father ever? ahh man i'll get fired! especially that youtold them ahead of time.

 

[gboy1230]

dang this sucks sorry to hear this op i wouldnt know how to handle this. i think your "step dad" was done wrong but i take my hat off to him forfathering you for the last 20+ yrs good man.

as far as work i think i would just bite the bullet and call off. i mean you gave them notice and if they can be responably enough to do there jobs then ohwell thast there beef.

 

[dirtylicious]

OP - suggestion... if you really want to go on this trip(although it doesn't sound like you do)... talk to you co-workers yourself... explain the situationand see if they can cover for you...offer to cover some of their shifts.

everyone wins..

 

[food4thgt]

#2

 

[bombiin201]

i would pick 2

 

[chokeonsmoke]

bull %@#% you asked in advance....yo get your request filled since you asked 3 weeks ago...oh yea depending on how long you would have been gone you shouldhave called in sick to get paid for sick days also.

 

[craftsy21]

I would demand they give you the days. It's completely unacceptable to tell someone they have off and then take it back weeks later, especially ifthey're planning on going away and what not.

I'm pretty sure this type of thing would hold up in terms of getting paid unemployment should they try to fire you also. Not that you want it to get tothat point, but if you gotta up the ante on them you probably have that on your side.