I'm a Stand Up Comedian. Video Inside.. Feedback Please. Check it Out

[sneakerpimp325]

Hey Niketalk, been working on my stand up. I would love any feedback possible. Thanks
Facebook Me: Lawrence DeLoach
Twitter: LZD325

 

[rocathajordans23]

You were actually pretty good. Keep it up!

 

[naturalylight]

I peeped, I don't know...I think you need a bit more confidence and energy, but that's just me Monday morning QBing 

 

[thunderchunk69]

props,
I remember your last vid.

edit:

I hate "topical" humor, like social networking, cellphones.

seems like a cheap laugh that won't stand the test of time.

but the crowd disagrees, so w/e 

also if you don't mind me asking

is the money worth your time? you have a dayjob?

edit #2:

your comedy name def works 

 

[solarius49]

hey bro I really liked it, and definitely laughed out loud. I've never done stand up, but I've really been wanting to put together a routine, so this was pretty inspirational

 

[dayman]

set was not bad...u should loosen up a bit
the only part i kinda laughed at was the mr miyagi is the most asian asian bit. I'm asian and i think it's true lol

 

[2morrowbegins2day]

That stunt was hilarious! keep it up. i dig.

 

[gunna get it]

yooo

good stuff Bruh. I liked the set, I liked the other set you posted a while back  better

Mr Miyagi

 

[deleted]

Not bad at all man...

You seem comfortable in front of a crowd and your material is unique. I liked the bit about CPS taking your friend's kid away.

The only real criticism I can give is to work on your transitions a little.

Do you do any blue stuff?

 

[iYen]

Props and your jokes were funny.

 

[bjamez20]

i remember your last set too, nice improvements, keep it up

 

[spizike231]

Man, props.

Good routine, I definitely laughed just sitting at my computer screen. Like dude up there said ^, try and commit a little more and be a little bit more active. The stripper havin a son your age and the fallin in love at a subway had my rollin.

Keep up the good work

 

[luong1209]

From your last one, you definitely look more comfortable...

Though I only laughed at the facebook likes part...Best of luck.

 

[dabottom305]

Funny stuff.

 

[jordan novice]

Wasn't bad, keep it up.

Question though, from an outsider to a comedian, what percentage of things are true or made up in comic stories? Just curious.

 

[breezylocks]

real life...

funny stuff man...

you do look a bit uncomfortable (but not like the last vid you posted) i think its because your body is so stiff or something...

 

[odog24]

the facebook part was kinda lame but everything else was good definetly enjoyed it

 

[chato]

Originally Posted by PLVN

Not bad at all man...

You seem comfortable in front of a crowd and your material is unique. I liked the bit about CPS taking your friend's kid away.

The only real criticism I can give is to work on your transitions a little.

Do you do any blue stuff?

I agree with the bit about working on your transitions. Maybe it's just me but I felt like at times you were rushing through a joke or talking slightly fast.
Good stuff though, I got laughs from it.

 

[boredone1]

Pretty Good.
That mr miyagi/ ryu part was hilarious. 

Your interaction with the crowd was great!

I'd say work on your transitions and delivery a lil though.

Keep it up! 

 

[airjordanjack]

Good stuff man, definitely not something I could do and respect you for having a successful routine. My only criticism would be that you seem a little too anxious to deliver your lines and they sound a little to memorized. Nothing serious though, overall great stuff.

 

[initial lotus]

Im very critical of standup, but that was very good. Nice job, keep it up.

 

[chuxndunx]

lol good stuff.

 

[socalkid]

You're funny bro.
The last time you posted that standup was funnier.

 

[k00laid]

lol very funny
in by the laughs of the crowd you were killing them

 

[koudie from brooklyn]

 i'd pay to watch you do that in front of me