Mature topic: Dating women that has had bad relationships w/ their father's.

[tego calderon el abayarde]

Originally Posted by Peep Game

Another thing, it's even more difficult if she grew up w/o a father, but you came from a stable 2 parent household. She just seriously may not
fathom certain obvious decisions you make based on how you were raised by your parents, whether they were/are the right ones or not. I guess
what it all boils down to is how compatible you two are yourselves, and what your plans are.

Chick I'm currently talking to seems like a cool down to earth person. Her father is pretty much a deadbeat. I was raised by both my parents so I have a different point of view on certain things than most people. What I'm dreading is that as I get to know her better certain red flags will show

 

[bluecheese]

im doomed

 

[yg716]

On the reverse side to this topic I always tell my boys that if they come across a chick they think is wife material 9 times out of 10 I bet her father was in their lives. They just know how to have respect for a man. And scandalous females it seems never had daddy around. Its def a correlation.

 

[39478]

happened with my brother and an ex. she always talked about how lame her dad was and I think that attitude she had towards men sometimes foiled off onto him. it bothered him a lot. she never wanted her dad around or wanted to talk to him or involve him with anything.

good luck fambs

 

[bigmike23]

Originally Posted by Sweettooth 17

Did it before learned my lesson..

 

[T Lo Sweater]

Originally Posted by fc15

Originally Posted by TroyD

the WORST. getting mad at the smallest $%@^, talking crazy, having unrealistic expectations of me etc. i learned my lesson as well.

Doesn't this describe most chicks though?

  

not necessarily. ive dealt with girls that had fathers in their entire lives and i didnt experience anything that i mentioned earlier

 

[retro23j]

STAY AWAY!

 

[jbpkickz]

did it twice, first girl was a freak but bat +@$* crazy, the other was real loud and she would try and fight me , its a tarp bro

 

[pleasurephd]

I don't know why, but my heart totally goes out to these kinda women. Something about seeing all of the struggles that they had to overcome in life (when it comes to their parents) on top of already all of the pressure which is put on them from societal expectations sometimes include even oppressive acts, and seeing these women overcome all of that with the capability to still love a man and accept him for his faults, allowing herself to become vulnerable enough to let him in. It amazes me, inspires me, and I admire them. 
Probably due to the fact that I have issues myself, including issues with my parents, so I can empathize. But, it just makes me wanna reach out to them and show them two things: 1. How much they really are worth and 2. How a real man is suppose to treat them. 

I know, yall gonna say "okay, captain save a JO" but I don't mean any women with a bad life/relationship with father. I mean the ones which still have self-worth, still stand strong, are independent, and are ambitious. They might have other problems from having a bad relationship with their fathers, but I really feel like those should be addressed head on to help them fix them because behind those "problems" is one STRONG and BEAUTIFUL woman. Worth MY time, at least. 

I've been with 2 women that dealt with bad fathers and grew up having a very rough life. They ended up on opposite sides of the spectrum. 

One was in her early 20s had been with 20-30+ men, dedicated herself to the man she was with. Was very strong and independent looking on the surface (introverted too), but once you got passed that she was so weak and needy. She was beautiful (inside and out) so she could have her choice of men, but really she just wanted to be with almost any man that met certain criteria as long as he loved her and only wanted to be with her. She was quick to say I love you and quick to sleep with you and quick to do everything for you. But, she valued our relationship more then she valued me as an individual. She tried her best  to dedicate herself to me and I tried the same but ultimately we didn't work out and as soon as I tried to sit her down and talk to her about our problems she was already on to the next man. I sincerely thought she loved me and would have waited for me to get through some of my personal hard times, even though I told her not too, but instead she was on to the next guy before I could even blink and eye. She admitted her loneliness and dependence on being with a man who tells her he loves her was too strong and more powerful then her feelings and love for me. Can't really blame her. 

The other one was also in her early twenties and she had been with ZERO men, she was also very strong and independent on the surface, and when you got passed that you still had a barrier in front of you. She didn't trust anyone, but she was very extroverted when she interacted with people. She  expected SO much out of a man and that's why she hadn't been with anyone yet because she didn't find anyone worth her time. She also was beautiful but for her she was so much more reserved and up held her morals like NO other person I've ever seen that wasn't brainwashed. She stood for her convictions and if you didn't meet her expectations in the slightest she would immediately kick you to the curb. She was very reserved not quick to give herself up emotionally or physical. She look a long time to say I love you and other things.  She valued the individual over the relationship though. And dedicated herself to me because of that. 

I guess the similarities are their ability to drop a man like nothing. And, both truly were looking for a serious committed relationship. Not just looking to date. 

But the differences are one was passive, had limited morals, and NEEDED a relationship. The other aggressive,  had extreme morals, and NEEDED the individual.  

Don't know if anyone can make anything out of this but I just wanted to share my experiences. In the end I loved both women for either similarities in what they represented as individuals who've overcome the odds, but  at the same time for their unique differences in how they acted in relationships. All in all I would say don't make assumptions before getting to know a woman, and realize what you are capable of as a man and what you can deal with when it comes to a woman like this. If you are looking to get serious with a woman I don't think daddy issues should be a deal breaker because like I said what is underneath those issues can be an extremely amazing woman. 

 

[6 Rings G.O.A.T.]

Dating them.. Sure if I find her attractive..

 

[throwedindagame]

been down that path too many times

women looking for the father figures they never had or just having ridiculous expectations.
These girls end up with overly aggressive "manly" dudes who will beat them anyways.

I just auto dead on site now for gf conversations, makes my life easier.

Is it fair for me to do that, no. But it is what it is

 

[wisepharoah]

Being a man growing up without a father it would be extremely hypocritical for me not to be involved with a woman that had a similar experience. With that being said it has taken an extremely hard amount of self reflection and honesty with myself for me to sift through all my issues and become the man I am today. I believe that there are women out there that have done the same.......... I just haven't met one, must of the girls that I've met with daddy issues are a complete and utter mess emotionally and mentally. I wouldn't recommend them for a young man just trying to be in a young and healthy relationship. You will find yourself playing psychologist more than enjoying the relationship.

 

[alanglois]

terrible idea. I dated one, she was a psycho !@@$. just put your head down and move on

 

[rs 87]

Originally Posted by Mark Antony

Depends on the person and their strength of character whether they'll let that define them and fall into stereotypical traits. Plus, there's too much deadbeat bum *@* *@+%%# out there, i'd never get laid if i took that stance.

LOL.. word

 

[me no pass]

Originally Posted by HybridSoldier23

Originally Posted by MetroKid26

Every girl that I know that are in unstable relationships, or can't keep have had bad relationships with their fathers, or just weren't around.

It's crazy how everything trickles down to parents. We learn everything from them, what to be like, what not to be like. When a man doesn't have a father, he has to learn compassion and self respect for himself. And when a girl doesn't have a father, not only do they have to deal with the mother who is going through a considerable amount of stress, but they must learn from their environment what a true example of a man is.

It's not impossible to find a compatible woman with a bad father relationship, but it's hard.

All of this.

Originally Posted by ninjahood

all my ex's had daddy issues...... i be loving da drama thou

unlike ninja not all of us "be loving da drama thou" dont date just smash

 

[703 hwy]

Originally Posted by babylonzion

women who were on bad terms with their dads are more likely to be sluts. a fathers duty is to make sure his daughter doesn't become a +$%#.
i'm weery of any girls who aren't on good terms with their fathers...

word

 

[gllahone84]

No drama over here with a dumb broad...cut her loose fast.

 

[dropten]

The father not being around is not the only issue. Some of the issue comes from the mothers. A perfect example is fathers day on FB. Thats when you see bitter women talking #@%+ about fathers. Even if the father is not around, the mother must take some responsibility and keep their daughters from going through the same thing they are. But they are so bitter they trickle down the negative ideas of men to thier daughters. Its not just the fathers choice for not being around, these women push them away and never want to take responsibility for their faults. Alot falls on men, and we are expected of so much. But when your dealing with a stressful woman, it just turns you away

 

[sofa king awsm]

never dated any like this..but my cousin had a bad relationship with her father. ima just say she turned out horrible.

 

[txcaddyking]

I married one. There has been some tough times.

Like what was said earlier, it is harder for you to understand what she is going through if you had a stable 2 parent house. Not saying 2 mentally unstable people are a good pair. Just that if you are the only mentally stable person, it can feel like banging your head against a wall.

And look at her mom. Not for hotness, but for mental strength. If she had a crazy person raise her, chances are greater that she will be crazy.

 

[proshares]

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

DON'T DO IT

I can't quote this enough to emphasize it.

 

[pharelfor3]

a few times. I've also met the ones with perfectly normal/stabel homes and just wile out for no reason. almost like they're rebeling. smh

 

[ballahb]

Currently learning this lesson

 

[atlien seeko]

HORRIBLE idea... I could tell stories, but I dont feel like it...

 

[CJ616]

It all depends, to be honest. You could have a chick with mental/emotional issue because of the absence of a father. But I've seen chicks who have unrealistic expectations for men and terrible ways of thinking (relationship wise) because their fathers spoiled them rotten. It really all depends. Chicks with bad daddy relationships are usually a no go, though.