- Jan 4, 2011
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Mind = Blown.
- Thread in 'General' Thread starter Started by campbellsoup,
- Start date
- May 9, 2009
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OP, What you're going thru is understandable but stupid. You are more emotionally attached to your ex. Go for the new chick and build with her. You wont regret it. What u will regret is being with the ex. It will only get worse if it doesnt get better.
- Oct 28, 2009
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- Oct 17, 2002
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THIS. I know plenty of people who have kids but aren't together and are very much functioning. You just need to set and establish clear rules.
- Jan 4, 2011
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I totally agree with what you're saying. I know this is stupid, but it's just hard on me mentally.
I mean when "Michelle" calls me now and I hear my son in background making whatever noise and I know she is putting in most of the work with him, I feel guilty. I feel like I shouldn't be out having fun or dating this new girl again. It's just tons of guilt that I carry around......
**EDIT** - Before anyone says anything, I am financially supporting my son. I'm not looking to walk out on either of them by any means.
I do see my son 3-4 times a week, but it's hard to get over "Michelle" when Im always seeing her.
- Oct 17, 2002
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Originally Posted by CampbellSoup
I totally agree with what you're saying. I know this is stupid, but it's just hard on me mentally.
I mean when "Michelle" calls me now and I hear my son in background making whatever noise and I know she is putting in most of the work with him, I feel guilty. I feel like I shouldn't be out having fun or dating this new girl again. It's just tons of guilt that I carry around......
**EDIT** - Before anyone says anything, I am financially supporting my son. I'm not looking to walk out on either of them by any means.
I do see my son 3-4 times a week, but it's hard to get over "Michelle" when Im always seeing her.
My friend splits her son with her baby daddy. She gets him 3 days and he gets him 4. Why don't you try something like that?
- Sep 1, 2000
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if the new girl still allows you to see your son, then choose her. Choosing to stay in an unhealthy relationship for your son is the wrong reason and it may not seem like it now but your son could follow suit. You have a chance to to be happy and raise a kid in a healthy enviroment, to me that's win-win. Just let go of the mother, i know its easier said than done but you have already listed so many other positives with this new girl, just dont sit on the fence too long. The last thing you need is 2 chicks mad at you man.
- Jul 29, 2006
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- Aug 25, 2008
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op i been thru exactly what your going thru. Your BM doesnt seem good for you i understand that you want to do the whole family thing but some times it just isnt meant to be. The new chick seems cool and is really down for you because most chicks would have just left when you told her you situation. You gotta do what makes you feel happy and more at peace. Now the drama thats going to come along with you leaving the BM is a headache. She is going to most likely keep your kid away from you for a lil but she will eventually come to light and realize that the child needs his father or if things dont go good like in my situation (didnt see my son for a good 8 months) do what i did and get full custody. Good Luck
- Aug 16, 2009
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Cut the cord and move on. Be a good dad to your son, and go be happy for yourself.
- Mar 31, 2005
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Who said that just because you have a baby with a girl, you have to stay with her? If the relationship is bad, move on son. Do you really see yourself being with "Michelle" for 18 years just because she had your baby? SMH at dropping the girl you're happy with for a doom relationship. Think of what YOU want.
- Oct 4, 2009
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This. As long as your there for your son and your happy with the new girl, your fine. Don't put yourself in a bad situation just because of the kid, kids pick up on that negative energy believe it or not.
- Aug 10, 2009
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Listen Here bro, why don't you just ask someone who has a better perspective on this situation?
i mean NT is cool for some quick advice but this isn't something that needs quick advice.
i mean NT is cool for some quick advice but this isn't something that needs quick advice.
- Jan 22, 2008
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Go with the new chick man. Its better in the long run.
You can still be part of your sons life while being with the new chick.
heres a question:
Who would you rather be with if you didnt have a son? the new or old chick?
dont use your son as an excuse to be with your ex and to try and make it work when theres obviously some problems.
You can still be part of your sons life while being with the new chick.
heres a question:
Who would you rather be with if you didnt have a son? the new or old chick?
dont use your son as an excuse to be with your ex and to try and make it work when theres obviously some problems.
- Jan 19, 2005
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First you need to let your son's mother know that you are not going to take her verbal abuse anymore.
I don't care what you have to say to get your point across, but say it and be done with it. These types of women want to start an argument in
front of the child, knowing that you want say anything back because the kid is around. Man up and let this broad know what kind of disgusting person that she is, and that you won't stand for it.
Don't worry about who you are going to be with until you do the above.
I don't care what you have to say to get your point across, but say it and be done with it. These types of women want to start an argument in
front of the child, knowing that you want say anything back because the kid is around. Man up and let this broad know what kind of disgusting person that she is, and that you won't stand for it.
Don't worry about who you are going to be with until you do the above.
- Jan 4, 2011
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I see what you did there.
But I catch your drift. I know NT isn't the best place for this kinda of stuff, but the responses I have gotten above actually do help...or they are reassuring for that matter.
I have a therapist I see when I need to, so I will be brining this up with her this week.
- Feb 4, 2010
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- Jan 4, 2011
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I did this last week, now its just a matter of following through with it. Of course she's been nothing but kind to me since then, but she's still the same....
- Oct 17, 2002
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Your therapist is going to tell you the same stuff we are.
- Jul 22, 2004
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drop both and get yourself right. You will always have a bond with your BM because of your son, but she isn't doing right by you so let her be and just be there for your son. The new girls seems emotionally unstable if a "break up" caused her to see a shrink.
- Jul 30, 2009
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Scrolled down, didn't see pics.
Immediately expressed my disgust with OP in Quick Reply box.
Immediately expressed my disgust with OP in Quick Reply box.
- Feb 2, 2006
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I was in the exact same situation, so I can tell you how the story will end if you follow my path. I went back to "new" girl only to leave her AGAIN for the BM. I reinforced that I was totally loyal to my fam and in turn my BM took me for granted, and the new girl was hurt doubly. All I can say is don't cheat yourself out of a good opportunity because you want to hold the fam together....actually I have no regrets. I would do it all over again. Just to have a chance to someday have my seed waking me up early in the morning or begging me to read her a story every night. I'm a sucker for the traditional life that I've never had.
- Sep 13, 2010
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- Jan 3, 2011
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- Jun 4, 2007
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ThisOp I been where u at, As much as I wanted it, u can never go back...it's not ever the same.
