Sibling Or Your Significant other??? Vol. Females come in here! What would you do??

[throwback1718]

Ok this is a kinda long read.


Maybe back in august my brother and I went away out of the country and I left the house keys with my girl to check in every other day or so.

Unbeknown to me, my brother left his set of keys with my best friend for the same reason.

Anyhow a few days after we left my girl has a convo with me about how my friend is strutting around the house as if he lives there. So the next day she calls me again saying how now he brought his girl over to spend the night in OUR house, playing music loudly @ like 12 AM when we have other tenants.

My brother was nearby and I told her to speak to him about it through the phone. He was upset and basically said that no one was supposed to be there in the first place.

She felt offended and totally by the comment. I personally didn't feel he said anything wrong because neither one of them were told to STAY there, only to pass by every so often.

So being that I didn't see anything wrong with the comment, there was a HUGE fall out between me and my girl, she cried, felt I "Didn't have her back" , Put my brother before her, Didn't Man up to him and put him in his place when she stated that she felt disrespected ETC. Even though I did speak to him about how she felt afterwards.

Since then we have never been on track properly and she has adopted a hatred for my brother.
He insists that he didn't say that to hurt her feelings and I was there when he said it and there wasn't any malice in his voice, just him stating a fact.
And I agreed that no one shoulda been in the house.


Recently we have been trying to repair the relationship.
WARNING THE FOLLOWING IS PRETTY IMMATURE

Fast forward to today, we went to the house and she was eating and she went into the fridge and grabbed a box of juice that he purchased. I always tell her when we are there to make sure she doesn't finish his juice or whatever drinks he has Its not anything new that I said. But she poured out the last drops of it

So she's like "so what?", "That seems to be a personal issue, not my problem", "Oh well"
"I don't care" and bein sarcastic as hell, that's when I started to get heated.

I'm like you wouldn't like if someone did that to your stuff especially with such disregard for their belongings. Especially since they hold a grudge against you. Then I said it's disrespectful... Its not only about juice

So then she jumped and basically was saying how I jump to my brother's defense when he was disrespecting her and not her defense yadda yadda. I explained that she is clearly trying to be disrespectful with what she's doing and my brother wasn't in his actions and I didn't feel that he was either.
So she saying she don't see anything wrong with finishing the juice. I said its more than just about finishing the juice its the fact that you have no regard just because its him.


Big fall out happens again, now she says she deserve someone better that will have her back and she hopes my brother loves me like a woman can

So given all the factors,

-this is my older brother who has 7 years on me and always has my back which ever way he can

-I know they say "Bros before Garden Tools" but this is a girl I have been with for about 3 1/2 years and was 3 months away from having a Kid with (RIP Nasir) So she isn't just "some chick"

Was I wrong? Overreacting? Any chance she gets to dog out my brother, she does, and I just had enough of it this time.  

Does she have valid points? I think I need a female to step in to explain their POV.

AND NOT TO MENTION WE ARE TALKING ABOUT JUICE HERE PEOPLE!!!!


Cliffs:

-Brother said something that the GF took to offense but there was no bad intentions behind it.
- Big fall out between I and GF for not "Having her back" Relationship was never the same

-Today GF felt it was okay to disrespect brother I felt It was not okay and said something about it.

- She brings up past issues and relates it to current situation

- Now she is telling me she hopes my brother can love me like a woman can


Go to the actual read for more detail. Sorry it's so long

 

[sneakerfr]

drop her. fam > anything

 

[throwback1718]

how did you even read that so quick

 

[sneakerfr]

I skipped to the cliffs bro

 

[throwedindagame]

Originally Posted by throwback1718

how did you even read that so quick

He didn't.

IMO, You even shouldn't be asking this question.
Untill you girl becomes your family, i.e. your wife....this issue IMO isn't even worth debating. That's my 2 cents though.

PS. I actually read your post (although reading was utterly pointless because, family>)

 

[mytmouse76]

you need to sit her down and tell her to chill...

as your girl she should respect your fam and their juice (i dont mind sharing food but my rule is just dont take the last of it)

i doubt its really anything to break up over but she does need to cut that foolishness out...even if her feelings were hurt she needs to get over it

 

[lol]

Originally Posted by throwback1718

how did you even read that so quick

lol

 

[mrdoeboi]

Tell her relax she blowing it out of proportion right is right and wrong is wrong it's rules me and my brother set that we both have to abide by and also you since your my girl simple.

 

[throwback1718]

Originally Posted by mytmouse76

you need to sit her down and tell her to chill...

as your girl she should respect your fam and their juice (i dont mind sharing food but my rule is just dont take the last of it)

i doubt its really anything to break up over but she does need to cut that foolishness out...even if her feelings were hurt she needs to get over it

sounded hilarious coming from someone else.

but MyT, you really think Sitting her down to talk is REALLY gonna work?

This girl is one who feels entitled to her opinion and she don't care no one is gonna take that away from her or make her think otherwise

I don't think its that serious but thats MY opinion in her words. To her she thinks it is regardless.

She's not one of those "Well maybe I was wrong" type people.
Family is >* in my eyes also. but My whole thing why is should I stand for her disrespecting a fam member just because of something in the past, as if it's a free ticket to do or say whatever she wants

 

[waveyjoneslocker]

Originally Posted by lol

Originally Posted by throwback1718

lol

Strong username to post content ratio.

 

[mytmouse76]

Originally Posted by throwback1718

Originally Posted by mytmouse76

you need to sit her down and tell her to chill...

as your girl she should respect your fam and their juice (i dont mind sharing food but my rule is just dont take the last of it)

i doubt its really anything to break up over but she does need to cut that foolishness out...even if her feelings were hurt she needs to get over it

sounded hilarious coming from someone else.

but MyT, you really think Sitting her down to talk is REALLY gonna work?

This girl is one who feels entitled to her opinion and she don't care no one is gonna take that away from her or make her think otherwise

I don't think its that serious but thats MY opinion in her words. To her she thinks it is regardless.

She's not one of those "Well maybe I was wrong" type people.
Family is >* in my eyes also. but My whole thing why is should I stand for her disrespecting a fam member just because of something in the past, as if it's a free ticket to do or say whatever she wants

just tell her to shut up then...did they not get along before?

i cant believe its this damn late...goodnight folks
  

 

[tego calderon el abayarde]

Bros over +#*%


Literally

 

[witnesskb24]

All over some juice, though?

 

[i3]

Girls kinda stupid for letting a small thing getting between this..

Sheesh.. how old is she? Needs to know the bigger picture.

 

[king jaffe]

Family over everything in almost every situation

 

[lightweight champion]

Sounds to me like she got offended over the summer because she thinks that since you gave her the key to check up on the house she is entitled to stay there anytime she feels like it, and since your brother said nobody should be there she became emo (your brother is in the right).



And yes, she finished his juice to spite him. And I completely get you, it ain't about juice it's about respect...which she has zero of for your brother.



OP, you, like me, have a chick who thinks entirely too much with her emotions and fantasy about what a perfect male companion would be; and less with the logic and common courtesy any regular human being would have for another who makes a respectful request.

 

[ohdannyboy]

Originally Posted by throwback1718

- Now she is telling me she hopes my brother can love me like a woman can

made me  

 

[Mister Meaner]

Originally Posted by Lightweight Champion

Sounds to me like she got offended over the summer because she thinks that since you gave her the key to check up on the house she is entitled to stay there anytime she feels like it, and since your brother said nobody should be there she became emo (your brother is in the right).

Not only this, but she probably thought in the very least she'd get some browny points with your bro, but instead was completely blindsided by the reaction, making her very defensive. Hard to say without knowing ol' girl.

However, if you two have put in the necessary time together & feel like each other is worth it, you two should have continuous conversations & debates about the matter. Remember to keep it civil. Do not let things escalate to arguments. I'm sure you already have though. If you find (or already found) that her thinking is so delusional, I'm afraid all might be lost. How can you repair something ingrained like that?

I don't think I helped at all seeing as this has been going on for months & she still has an issue.

, sorry broseph.

 

[put em up]

shes a clown dead her now, and save yourself the drama.


This is petty stuff when some real *%#* hit the fan. your really gonna regret sticking this long with her.

shes clearly in the wrong. Then she told you she needs to find somebody who can treat her better...

 

[irie]

Originally Posted by WITNESSkb24

All over some juice, though?

way bigger than juice son

 

[starzinoureyes]

Originally Posted by Super Producer J

Originally Posted by Lightweight Champion

Sounds to me like she got offended over the summer because she thinks that since you gave her the key to check up on the house she is entitled to stay there anytime she feels like it, and since your brother said nobody should be there she became emo (your brother is in the right).

Not only this, but she probably thought in the very least she'd get some browny points with your bro, but instead was completely blindsided by the reaction, making her very defensive. Hard to say without knowing ol' girl. 
  

This right here. I'd feel hurt as hell, dude. /:

OP, when you described your girl as the type to always be right & "who feels entitled to her opinion and she don't care", it's almost like you know what happens next. That type of person, male or female, can't ever compromise in any type of relationship. If you think it's bad now, her getting bent out of shape over your brother's thoughts & acting like a kid by purposely disrespecting him, imagine if you decide to stick it out & get married. She'll be an absolute delight to deal with.

 

[xdunksbx]

drop the girl asap.

 

[genx]

You got the juice now.

 

[noah caine]

Originally Posted by Put em up

shes a clown dead her now, and save yourself the drama.


This is petty stuff when some real *%#* hit the fan. your really gonna regret sticking this long with her.

shes clearly in the wrong. Then she told you she needs to find somebody who can treat her better...

This.

Honestly OP if she had the nerve to do the juice thing out of pure spite and hold a grudge against your flesh and blood she isn't headed down the right path.

Also if she could talk so freely about leaving you or finding "sombody to treat her better" after such a petty incident she clearly doesn't respect your relationship that deeply. Imagine if something big had occured, she just proved that she'd be looking for a new dude in a heartbeat.

 

I hope no offense was taken.

 

[dirtylicious]

your mistake was trying to mediate it.. should have just said, you're both important to me, handle the issue between yourselves..

but now she's being disrespectful to your brother.... so drop her if she can't understand the importance of loyalty to family