Stay friends with an ex? yay or nay

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May 8, 2010
I'm wondering if I should stay friends with an ex-girlfriend or not.....

She is a very good person and is a very good friend to have around, but I just don't think it's fair for ME. I still love her yet she just wants to be "friends" which I think means she's keeping me on a leash while she has time to find new dudes. ( She KNOWS FOR A FACT that I still like her and that I'm trying to get her back BECAUSE I TOLD HER THAT I STILL LIKE HER AND WANT HER BACK, yet she still talks to me and shizzle likes there's no problem)

What do you guys think.....? Yay or nay........
 
Nay.

If I was still in love with an ex and I knew for sure we'd never get back together, I'd never wanna see/speak to her again.
 
yes...i still love my ex, but now that we're just friends i dont have to deal w/ her flaws or have the pressure of a relationship..its simple now
 
the thing is.. i'm still trying/wanting to get back with her, but i think she's already moved on.... and that she's already feeling some other dude....

and i think if i abide by her wishes to still be friends i'm just gonna be in more pain because seeing her with another dude while i still want her back is painful as hellllllllllllllllllllll
 
Well considering in your case, she ended it and you still have feelings, I say nay.

You're going to interpret "friend" things as signs she wants you back, but you're probably going to be misreading it. Chances are, she's keeping you around as a friend so she can jump to another guy without having to be completely single and alone. She can still get the consistent attention from you, while playing the field and trying out the new models. Don't be her courtesy car... (I'm trying a car metaphor, stay with me..)

It also goes back to a post a few days ago, I assume it was a DCAllAmerican thread, about whether or not you can/should be friends with women. I think it can be healthy and mutually beneficial, 9/10 one party usually has or had feelings for one another, but it might not be an issue where it hurts the friendship.

For you, cut ties completely and try to get over her. Being around her won't make it any easier and you're just delaying the inevitable. Do you really want to be BFFs with her when she starts dating a new guy? If you genuinely want to be friends with her, then give yourself some space and time to get over her, then try it out.
 
You answered your own question. Plus if you really want her back, you have to show her that you can do better by yourself. Only way she will want to get you back. Unless you're seen with a better chick.
 
I tried. I failed. I took more damage than if I'd have just let her fade into Bolivian to begin with.
 
Originally Posted by Big J 33

Well considering in your case, she ended it and you still have feelings, I say nay.

You're going to interpret "friend" things as signs she wants you back, but you're probably going to be misreading it. Chances are, she's keeping you around as a friend so she can jump to another guy without having to be completely single and alone. She can still get the consistent attention from you, while playing the field and trying out the new models. Don't be her courtesy car... (I'm trying a car metaphor, stay with me..)


It also goes back to a post a few days ago, I assume it was a DCAllAmerican thread, about whether or not you can/should be friends with women. I think it can be healthy and mutually beneficial, 9/10 one party usually has or had feelings for one another, but it might not be an issue where it hurts the friendship.

For you, cut ties completely and try to get over her. Being around her won't make it any easier and you're just delaying the inevitable. Do you really want to be BFFs with her when she starts dating a new guy? If you genuinely want to be friends with her, then give yourself some space and time to get over her, then try it out.

truth. right here.
 
generally doesn't work out. so i would say naaaah, let it go. but i mean if y'all are in some sort of like mutual friend type agreement. keep her there, you can probably smash later on..
 
Originally Posted by BOTTOM74BOTTOM

I tried. I failed. I took more damage than if I'd have just let her fade into Bolivian to begin with.
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don't do it OP... she's smashing other dudes already
 
so.... how should i break it off with her then.....?

i work with her right now ....and we broke up a little over a month ago.. however, i was stupid and got her this job hoping it would help us get back together.....

we talk with each other at work and eat lunch together occasionally, so how do i go about breaking ties with her...? just stop talking to her all of a sudden or what cuz that seems kinda douchey
 
Yay, I was best friends with my current girlfriend before we started going out, and I know sometimes feelings sometimes get in the way, but we're going to try to be friends no matter what happens down the road. I can never imagine just cutting her out of my life entirely.
 
damn son...and you work with her too
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. that sucks...trust me, getting involved with somebody at your job is not whats hot in the streets. what happens if she starts talking to other dudes there? you know there gonna be tryin to get at that...
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might as well look for another job
 
Originally Posted by BOTTOM74BOTTOM

I tried. I failed. I took more damage than if I'd have just let her fade into Oblivion to begin with.
True words spoken (typed).
 
Originally Posted by Big J 33

Well considering in your case, she ended it and you still have feelings, I say nay.

You're going to interpret "friend" things as signs she wants you back, but you're probably going to be misreading it. Chances are, she's keeping you around as a friend so she can jump to another guy without having to be completely single and alone. She can still get the consistent attention from you, while playing the field and trying out the new models. Don't be her courtesy car... (I'm trying a car metaphor, stay with me..)

It also goes back to a post a few days ago, I assume it was a DCAllAmerican thread, about whether or not you can/should be friends with women. I think it can be healthy and mutually beneficial, 9/10 one party usually has or had feelings for one another, but it might not be an issue where it hurts the friendship.

For you, cut ties completely and try to get over her. Being around her won't make it any easier and you're just delaying the inevitable. Do you really want to be BFFs with her when she starts dating a new guy? If you genuinely want to be friends with her, then give yourself some space and time to get over her, then try it out.
Yo dude, I went through the exact same stuff that was described and cutting her out is the best thing to do. I didn't want to at first, but once you do, you'll be a lot better off.
 
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