Relationship help vol. Ethnic tensions

[RustyShackleford]

 

distance yourself from your mom for a while. she'll miss you and have to accept her if you wants you back in her life.

That move don't work in island woman. They interpret it as "she stole my son from me" or "he is picking his GF over his own mother"


Then you got a new headache to deal with

Or even worse they will say the girl used Obeah or Voodoo to steal the guy away

Squezzin the yamb juice from the draws into the macaroni pie

 

[aNYone]

 
Or even worse they will say the girl used Obeah or Voodoo to steal the guy away

 FACTS  They gon say she put root under your bed or something

 

[heliumclinton]

Won't change until you get married and have kids and threaten that you won't let her see her grand kids.

Srs

 

[Rootin4EverybodyBlack]

Tell her in 'Murica all y'all is considered black and she needs to let that b.s. go because nobody cares.

Spoiler: Warning: Spoiler!

Semi srs

 

[aNYone]

Won't change until you get married and have kids and threaten that you won't let her see her grand kids.

Srs

Not saying his Mother But Real talk Some parents might look at their own grandkids funny style 

 

[dropten]

Tell your mom to shut up and do not mention your gf again unless its something possitive.

Im jamaican if that matters

 

[Coromanti]

 
My people are from Antigua. Both mother and father and their mother and father and so forth and so forth.

Quote:

My family is from St. Lucia. Any girl from Barbados or Jamaica will be looked down upon. Especially Jamaica.

She will never change, those stupid island bigotry that exist in the islands is so hardwired into peoples heads.

You need to check your mother though, tell her she gotta at least act civil.

Son it's like every islander not from Jamaica hates Jamaicans with a passion.

**** I've even met Jamaicans that didn't think too highly of other Jamaicans.

I can't count how many times I've heard them be compared to rats and roaches.

 

 

distance yourself from your mom for a while. she'll miss you and have to accept her if you wants you back in her life.

That move don't work in island woman. They interpret it as "she stole my son from me" or "he is picking his GF over his own mother"

Then you got a new headache to deal with

Or even worse they will say the girl used Obeah or Voodoo to steal the guy away

Word. She's haitian so that's immediately what they'd jump to.

 

 

 

distance yourself from your mom for a while. she'll miss you and have to accept her if you wants you back in her life.

That move don't work in island woman. They interpret it as "she stole my son from me" or "he is picking his GF over his own mother"


Then you got a new headache to deal with

Or even worse they will say the girl used Obeah or Voodoo to steal the guy away

Squezzin the yamb juice from the draws into the macaroni pie

 

 
Or even worse they will say the girl used Obeah or Voodoo to steal the guy away

 FACTS  They gon say she put root under your bed or something

Facts.

Won't change until you get married and have kids and threaten that you won't let her see her grand kids.

Srs

I thought about that but that is so far off it's not an option at this point.

Tell her in 'Murica all y'all is considered black and she needs to let that b.s. go because nobody cares.

Spoiler: Warning: Spoiler!

Semi srs

I just might....

 

[antidope]

Born Jamaican here, my uncle married a Haitian, and thats how I found out about this stigma. I think its stupid.

My parents couldnt care less about these things though, I've brought home Haitian girls before with no issues, some of my homies that I've known since the 4th grade are Haitians. Its all love with me.

West Indian people can be on some petty stuff overall, I have grand aunts and uncles who havent spoken in over 50 years over some straight BS... Missing birthdays and funerals 

 

[Coromanti]

 
Born Jamaican here, my uncle married a Haitian, and thats how I found out about this stigma. I think its stupid.

My parents couldnt care less about these things though, I've brought home Haitian girls before with no issues, some of my homies that I've known since the 4th grade are Haitians. Its all love with me.

West Indian people can be on some petty stuff overall, I have grand aunts and uncles who havent spoken in over 50 years over some straight BS... Missing birthdays and funerals 

For reals...holding a grudge/pettiness is practically a regional past time.

 

[Master Zik]

It's funny cuz also among the Caribbean community it's well known that Jamaican women have horrible attitudes. So the stereotypical experience I've had makes me think it's no surprise your mom is that disrespectful

All I can tell you is detach yourself from your fam. You don't need their acceptance. Don't let your fam, especially your mom c-block you man or worse, ruin a possible great relationship.

I've noticed this somewhat hate towards Haitians since JHS. I don't completely get it either but it sure is thick in my household how they'll off handly refer to something negative, tacky or poor as Haitian Mind you my fam has Haitian neighbors. Same ppl want to act a certain type of way about being discriminated.

 

[6 Rings G.O.A.T.]

Take your mom out of your relationship..

 

[htg designs]

My parents are Jamaican and I know exactly what your talking about. Baseless bigotry, aka that slave mentality ( divide and conquer). You are right, your mom aint gonna change, but you should try to sit her down and reason with her. You should let her know if she cares about you, then she should at least put up with whom you care about. Remind her your girl didn't choose where she was born or who she was born to. And try to show her she would feel if she were in that situation, being disrespected after being respectful.... Be blessed OP

 

[beh235]

 
NT fam..I need some help.

I'm Jamaican & Guyanese, my girlfriend is Haitian.

For those that don't know, Haiti among the peoples of the english caribbean is often looked down upon.  Furthermore, Jamaicans and Haitians stereotypically dislike

each other.

My mother, the Jamaican one, is having trouble stomaching the fact my girl is Haitian.  Now everything I do is because of "my Haitian girlfriend."  She is acting petty

about everything and has been disrespectful to my girl to her face on numerous occasions.

I'm not expecting her to let go decades of unprecedented bigotry just like that but I at least expected her to behave cordially.

And not that I've met her but my girl assures me that if I were to meet her mother she would at least act civil.

How do I get my mother to act civil and get her head out her ***?

 

How long have you two been seriously dating?

Almost three months

It's still early in the game fam. If you're really feeling her, then your mom has no choice to respect it. The only thing that will smooth this out is time. Over time, you mom has to realize that you two want to be together and respect it. Then she'll realize how ridiculous she's been acting. Unless she's ultra stubborn 

. Same thing goes for her mom.

 

[rell826]

this thread. As a Trinidadian x Guyanese cat I know this too well.

 

[akajae]

didn't know this was a thing

one of my good friends is Haitian and I never picked up on this from him or his family...

then again his girl is Latina.

 

[aNYone]

didn't know this was a thing

one of my good friends is Haitian and I never picked up on this from him or his family...

then again his girl is Latina.

If shes dominican that may have been a problem

 

[Coromanti]

It's funny cuz also among the Caribbean community it's well known that Jamaican women have horrible attitudes. So the stereotypical experience I've had makes me think it's no surprise your mom is that disrespectful

All I can tell you is detach yourself from your fam. You don't need their acceptance. Don't let your fam, especially your mom c-block you man or worse, ruin a possible great relationship.

I've noticed this somewhat hate towards Haitians since JHS. I don't completely get it either but it sure is thick in my household how they'll off handly refer to something negative, tacky or poor as Haitian

Mind you my fam has Haitian neighbors. Same ppl want to act a certain type of way about being discriminated.

!!!!!

 

[jayzz]

You a grown man op
You should be able to love and coexist with whoever the hell you want

Tell your mom straight up you either accept US or lose ME

 

[dabottom305]

Keep doing your thing OP. Your mom is eventually going to accept that your girl makes you happy or continue her old ways.

 

[sunshineblotters]

I have a parent like this. I really don't understand my Dad's hatred. He hates every race but he doesnt. Dont think my mom gives a ****. I told em they could never meet anyone I would be dating cuz I wont deal with their disrespect.

Nigerian btw. But I have pretty much denounced that culture.

 

[urbetterthenme]

 
NT fam..I need some help.

I'm Jamaican & Guyanese, my girlfriend is Haitian.

For those that don't know, Haiti among the peoples of the english caribbean is often looked down upon.  Furthermore, Jamaicans and Haitians stereotypically dislike

each other.

My mother, the Jamaican one, is having trouble stomaching the fact my girl is Haitian.  Now everything I do is because of "my Haitian girlfriend."  She is acting petty

about everything and has been disrespectful to my girl to her face on numerous occasions.

I'm not expecting her to let go decades of unprecedented bigotry just like that but I at least expected her to behave cordially.

And not that I've met her but my girl assures me that if I were to meet her mother she would at least act civil.

How do I get my mother to act civil and get her head out her ***?

But ain't both of yall BLACK?

 

[diego]

I thought black people couldn't be racist.

 

[Coromanti]

 

 
NT fam..I need some help.

I'm Jamaican & Guyanese, my girlfriend is Haitian.

For those that don't know, Haiti among the peoples of the english caribbean is often looked down upon.  Furthermore, Jamaicans and Haitians stereotypically dislike

each other.

My mother, the Jamaican one, is having trouble stomaching the fact my girl is Haitian.  Now everything I do is because of "my Haitian girlfriend."  She is acting petty

about everything and has been disrespectful to my girl to her face on numerous occasions.

I'm not expecting her to let go decades of unprecedented bigotry just like that but I at least expected her to behave cordially.

And not that I've met her but my girl assures me that if I were to meet her mother she would at least act civil.

How do I get my mother to act civil and get her head out her ***?

But ain't both of yall BLACK?

Ethnicity in the Caribbean often means more than race. A black, chinese, white, and indian jamaican friend group would be closer than a friend group of an african american, jamaican, nigerian, and panamanian.

I thought black people couldn't be racist.

It's not racism. It would be ethnocentrism.  And please dont make this a race thread.

 

[truballa101]

This isn't a race issue.

It's an ethnic issues.

EDIT: thanks for clarifying ^

 

[RustyShackleford]

I thought black people couldn't be racist.

How about you treat this thread like a hot girl on a plane, and not talk.