College

[tryingtomakeamil]

continue to do well in class, and the rest will fall into place.....whenever your thrown into something so different you kinda go into shock, calm down and stay focused

 

[tryingtomakeamil]

continue to do well in class, and the rest will fall into place.....whenever your thrown into something so different you kinda go into shock, calm down and stay focused

 

[samduh562]

college isn't intended as a social experience tho. Don't blame college. Blame yourself

 

[samduh562]

college isn't intended as a social experience tho. Don't blame college. Blame yourself

 

[jaysrcrak]

Since you are doing well in your courses, it might be worth your time to tutor one of your sexy classmates.
This will put you in a position of confidence and authority. Which girls like. It will also make it easier for you to get their numbers and/or email address, facebook, etc.
Work your way in as a friend, and hang out with her, NOT trying to smash. This will open up the door for you to smash many, if not all of her friends.

In other words, use a sexy female to get a sexy female.

 

[jaysrcrak]

Since you are doing well in your courses, it might be worth your time to tutor one of your sexy classmates.
This will put you in a position of confidence and authority. Which girls like. It will also make it easier for you to get their numbers and/or email address, facebook, etc.
Work your way in as a friend, and hang out with her, NOT trying to smash. This will open up the door for you to smash many, if not all of her friends.

In other words, use a sexy female to get a sexy female.

 

[mf doomer]

Stay focused and things will fall into place regardless. Don't be a dude that stays in his dorm 24/7, you should go out with your teammates and meet ladies. Since you play a sport that's a plus to chicks in college.

 

[mf doomer]

Stay focused and things will fall into place regardless. Don't be a dude that stays in his dorm 24/7, you should go out with your teammates and meet ladies. Since you play a sport that's a plus to chicks in college.

 

[derventa]

On the opposite spectrum, is anyone very involved in school and knows TOO many people? I was an orientation leader, im involved with RHA(residence hall association) which I hold an executive position in, and I work on campus in a first year residence hall. I literally know the whole first year class, including many administrators and faculty. And I have a girlfriend on top of all this. It really is a lot for me to handle. 
My friend count jumped from 750 to over 1000 this school year (not blowing my own *$+@, just saying)...but I wish I could walk around campus like a normal human being for once without giving 25 daps on my way to school..

My advice to you: Jump out of your comfort zone by joining a club, be a clown, be a goof...people love to laugh so if you make people smile they will notice you more and start saying waddup just by walking around.

 

[derventa]

On the opposite spectrum, is anyone very involved in school and knows TOO many people? I was an orientation leader, im involved with RHA(residence hall association) which I hold an executive position in, and I work on campus in a first year residence hall. I literally know the whole first year class, including many administrators and faculty. And I have a girlfriend on top of all this. It really is a lot for me to handle. 
My friend count jumped from 750 to over 1000 this school year (not blowing my own *$+@, just saying)...but I wish I could walk around campus like a normal human being for once without giving 25 daps on my way to school..

My advice to you: Jump out of your comfort zone by joining a club, be a clown, be a goof...people love to laugh so if you make people smile they will notice you more and start saying waddup just by walking around.

 

[fenixconnexion.]

focusing on school and getting good grades > partying, drinking, and then dropping out

 

[fenixconnexion.]

focusing on school and getting good grades > partying, drinking, and then dropping out

 

[mangudai954]

Originally Posted by ClevelandsPrince23

Theres a lot of student who are just like you OP. College is so much different than high school. You don't know everyone anymore, and it forces us to go out of our comfort zone and meet people. Just be friendly in class or even just walking around campus. It never hurts just to say hey how are you to a random.

 

[mangudai954]

Originally Posted by ClevelandsPrince23

Theres a lot of student who are just like you OP. College is so much different than high school. You don't know everyone anymore, and it forces us to go out of our comfort zone and meet people. Just be friendly in class or even just walking around campus. It never hurts just to say hey how are you to a random.

 

[speakup23]

Originally Posted by Dynamic X

Originally Posted by Nike Star Jay

disregard females, acquire cum laude loads

Just kidding. Don't worry about it OP.

Damn I thought I was the only one having problems meeting people in college. Now I see $!%% aint as easy as I thought it should be. I thought it was because I was lame and that my school is lame (Queens College, commuting school. ($!%% is wack idc what no one says)).

But yea, you and I OP we just gotta come out of our comfort zones and get out there. Clubs and teams are good ways to do that.

 

[speakup23]

Originally Posted by Dynamic X

Originally Posted by Nike Star Jay

disregard females, acquire cum laude loads

Just kidding. Don't worry about it OP.

Damn I thought I was the only one having problems meeting people in college. Now I see $!%% aint as easy as I thought it should be. I thought it was because I was lame and that my school is lame (Queens College, commuting school. ($!%% is wack idc what no one says)).

But yea, you and I OP we just gotta come out of our comfort zones and get out there. Clubs and teams are good ways to do that.

 

[paliplaya2010]

Originally Posted by Mo Matik

Your faith is getting in the way of what is considered the proper form of socialization in college. This isn't a bad thing. This shows you have will, which is certainly a positive characteristic.

However, it's apparent you lack confidence. Work on techniques to take yourself out of your comfort zone. There's plenty of lists available online of ways to accomplish this. It's going to take a lot of effort. Also, it'd help greatly to take a public speaking class next semester. This would actually force you out of your comfort zone.

The most important thing is that you simply need to socialize with people you share your faith with. Go to your MSA meetings and meet other Muslims. Do you go to a school with a descent amount? Transferring to a school with a relatively large amount of Muslims would certainly help. I'm sure a majority would be welcoming and support a friendship. You are simply not going to make strong bonds with non-Muslims very easily without participating in the most popular form of socialization in alcohol consumption. You can bypass that by building your confidence though.

Also, don't forget, your at school to do well. That's priority #1, and you're doing that. Many incoming freshman make the mistake of having the wrong priorities, and building a social life first. You made the most logical decision. Kudos for that.


Again, don't be so hard on yourself. Your initial post screams of self pity. Whether or not this was intentional is beside the point. You either wanted to appear to pity yourself or you actually do.

Value yourself, and others will follow. You have already displayed a lot of good qualities from the very little I know about you.

EDIT:

Also, reconsider transferring to another school unless you will actually be living on campus.

If you're transferring to another school and will be commuting, you can probably forget about building that social life you desire.  I speak from experience.

The thing is a have an astronomical amount of confidence and swagger, i think it came off a little too strong to a lot of teammates so I wasnt liked by many of the upper classmen n i tried the whole party scene, n honestly without being with your boys or drunk, its no fun. plus my 1 real friend is also transferring next year. the only reason i dont wanna transfer is it will be a worse college n i will be commuting. only positive thing is a have a ton of friends who go there.

 

[paliplaya2010]

Originally Posted by Mo Matik

Your faith is getting in the way of what is considered the proper form of socialization in college. This isn't a bad thing. This shows you have will, which is certainly a positive characteristic.

However, it's apparent you lack confidence. Work on techniques to take yourself out of your comfort zone. There's plenty of lists available online of ways to accomplish this. It's going to take a lot of effort. Also, it'd help greatly to take a public speaking class next semester. This would actually force you out of your comfort zone.

The most important thing is that you simply need to socialize with people you share your faith with. Go to your MSA meetings and meet other Muslims. Do you go to a school with a descent amount? Transferring to a school with a relatively large amount of Muslims would certainly help. I'm sure a majority would be welcoming and support a friendship. You are simply not going to make strong bonds with non-Muslims very easily without participating in the most popular form of socialization in alcohol consumption. You can bypass that by building your confidence though.

Also, don't forget, your at school to do well. That's priority #1, and you're doing that. Many incoming freshman make the mistake of having the wrong priorities, and building a social life first. You made the most logical decision. Kudos for that.


Again, don't be so hard on yourself. Your initial post screams of self pity. Whether or not this was intentional is beside the point. You either wanted to appear to pity yourself or you actually do.

Value yourself, and others will follow. You have already displayed a lot of good qualities from the very little I know about you.

EDIT:

Also, reconsider transferring to another school unless you will actually be living on campus.

If you're transferring to another school and will be commuting, you can probably forget about building that social life you desire.  I speak from experience.

The thing is a have an astronomical amount of confidence and swagger, i think it came off a little too strong to a lot of teammates so I wasnt liked by many of the upper classmen n i tried the whole party scene, n honestly without being with your boys or drunk, its no fun. plus my 1 real friend is also transferring next year. the only reason i dont wanna transfer is it will be a worse college n i will be commuting. only positive thing is a have a ton of friends who go there.

 

[alrjordan]

Im a junior in college. Lucky for me I have a good handful of people down here I know and are good friends with. That can also be a bad thing because then sometimes its to easy to just kick it with them all the time. However, I like to go out on weekends, and really it just comes down to just being able to carry a conversation. There are SO MANY people on college campuses, you are guaranteed to meet someone you click with if you try. Going to the gym and playing ball/working out is a great place to just say whats up. Also, you spend 5 days a week IN CLASS, and im sure plenty of your classmates are in the same position as you, they would love for someone to come up and introduce themselves (just as im sure you would Sh** yourself if someone came up to you and started talking).

But everyone experiences this OP. Its part of college, and a part of life. Its about finding yourself, learning to take care of yourself, and learning to grow as a person.

Just make an effort to put yourself out there and meet people, sometimes it will work, and sometimes it wont. But for every 50 fails, you will have a success, and it will be worth it. All it takes is a little luck, and a good attitude.

Good luck OP!

 

[alrjordan]

Im a junior in college. Lucky for me I have a good handful of people down here I know and are good friends with. That can also be a bad thing because then sometimes its to easy to just kick it with them all the time. However, I like to go out on weekends, and really it just comes down to just being able to carry a conversation. There are SO MANY people on college campuses, you are guaranteed to meet someone you click with if you try. Going to the gym and playing ball/working out is a great place to just say whats up. Also, you spend 5 days a week IN CLASS, and im sure plenty of your classmates are in the same position as you, they would love for someone to come up and introduce themselves (just as im sure you would Sh** yourself if someone came up to you and started talking).

But everyone experiences this OP. Its part of college, and a part of life. Its about finding yourself, learning to take care of yourself, and learning to grow as a person.

Just make an effort to put yourself out there and meet people, sometimes it will work, and sometimes it wont. But for every 50 fails, you will have a success, and it will be worth it. All it takes is a little luck, and a good attitude.

Good luck OP!

 

[dakingii]

Originally Posted by ElijahDukes

focusing on school and getting good grades > partying, drinking, and then dropping out

whatever makes yourself feel better....
lets be real here grades arent everything in college. Its about the experience and peer communication. I drink and chill all the time and still manage to keep my GPA above a 3.0. I want to look back at my college experience and know that i had a good time. I dont want to just say i had good grades.

no offense to you and those who feel this way though sir

EDIT: and i was in the same boat as OP my freshman year. I commuted and i hated it. Wasnt able to meet alot of people and i felt like a loser/lame for a long time. I decided to stay on campus my sophomore year and my life did a complete 180. I felt like my old self again.

The only thing i can say is try and join some clubs/groups(I didnt need to but this isnt about me). Like other people said in this thread there are alot of other people in your school/classes that are just like you and just want somebody to talk to. You just have to leave your comfort zone.

 

[dakingii]

Originally Posted by ElijahDukes

focusing on school and getting good grades > partying, drinking, and then dropping out

whatever makes yourself feel better....
lets be real here grades arent everything in college. Its about the experience and peer communication. I drink and chill all the time and still manage to keep my GPA above a 3.0. I want to look back at my college experience and know that i had a good time. I dont want to just say i had good grades.

no offense to you and those who feel this way though sir

EDIT: and i was in the same boat as OP my freshman year. I commuted and i hated it. Wasnt able to meet alot of people and i felt like a loser/lame for a long time. I decided to stay on campus my sophomore year and my life did a complete 180. I felt like my old self again.

The only thing i can say is try and join some clubs/groups(I didnt need to but this isnt about me). Like other people said in this thread there are alot of other people in your school/classes that are just like you and just want somebody to talk to. You just have to leave your comfort zone.

 

[throwback1718]

shoot in my school everyone just goes to class and goes about their business, its a tech school. definitely might be a lot less socializing than the average college too.

at least most your classmates are around your age.

 

[yen2dro3]

Originally Posted by paliplaya2010

Originally Posted by Mo Matik

Your faith is getting in the way of what is considered the proper form of socialization in college. This isn't a bad thing. This shows you have will, which is certainly a positive characteristic.

However, it's apparent you lack confidence. Work on techniques to take yourself out of your comfort zone. There's plenty of lists available online of ways to accomplish this. It's going to take a lot of effort. Also, it'd help greatly to take a public speaking class next semester. This would actually force you out of your comfort zone.

The most important thing is that you simply need to socialize with people you share your faith with. Go to your MSA meetings and meet other Muslims. Do you go to a school with a descent amount? Transferring to a school with a relatively large amount of Muslims would certainly help. I'm sure a majority would be welcoming and support a friendship. You are simply not going to make strong bonds with non-Muslims very easily without participating in the most popular form of socialization in alcohol consumption. You can bypass that by building your confidence though.

Also, don't forget, your at school to do well. That's priority #1, and you're doing that. Many incoming freshman make the mistake of having the wrong priorities, and building a social life first. You made the most logical decision. Kudos for that.


Again, don't be so hard on yourself. Your initial post screams of self pity. Whether or not this was intentional is beside the point. You either wanted to appear to pity yourself or you actually do.

Value yourself, and others will follow. You have already displayed a lot of good qualities from the very little I know about you.

EDIT:

Also, reconsider transferring to another school unless you will actually be living on campus.

If you're transferring to another school and will be commuting, you can probably forget about building that social life you desire.  I speak from experience.

The thing is a have an astronomical amount of confidence and swagger, i think it came off a little too strong to a lot of teammates so I wasnt liked by many of the upper classmen n i tried the whole party scene, n honestly without being with your boys or drunk, its no fun. plus my 1 real friend is also transferring next year. the only reason i dont wanna transfer is it will be a worse college n i will be commuting. only positive thing is a have a ton of friends who go there.

Loudest one in the room is the weakest.

 T.O 

 

[throwback1718]

shoot in my school everyone just goes to class and goes about their business, its a tech school. definitely might be a lot less socializing than the average college too.

at least most your classmates are around your age.