Confessions

One last thing for now, when the hell is she going to kick in? I've paid every bill that has come into the house, it would be one thing if she didn't work, but she does, where in the hell is that money? Alright, you don't pay any bills, at least stack your paycheck in the savings account, but noooooo, she doesn't even do that. I just paid off a suv, that I bought for her, where is that money going, where the hell is my money at? This has 1 month and I'm walking. I don't give a **** about nothing else, I'm not getting younger, and damn it I have goals like every member on this board, I don't work as hard as I do not to know what is what. The last thing I need to worry about is where is MY effing money. It just pisses me off. She also doesn't like when people she knows are doing good for themselves, for example, her friend can call and be like, "me and so and so are going to buy a house or go on vacation" she'll come to me and tell me alllllll about it and be like "remember when ol' girl used to be a sloot?" I'm like you're a hater of the highest caliber, why didn't I leave sooo many years ago? She the type that if I'm washing her suv, and I say her suv because I bought it for her to drive, she's made not one payment, ever on any vehicle that has ever been parked on my driveway, she'll come out there and be like "I was going to do that". I'm like when, because it looks like ***. Just like the other night, I come home and she is sitting around after getting home for work, I started folding laundry and ironing, and she starts " I was going to do that, but you got in the way" so I shot back, "never mind the damn laundry got folded and ironed and put away, just worry about me being in the way, it sure didn't bother you enough to ask if I wanted help or for you to get off of your ***, so just sit up there and watch me in the workout clothes that you don't work out in and shut your effing mouth", I'm almost 40 and I just don't want to waste any more time because she wants to regress in life and I want to progress in life. If I didn't know her already, I wouldn't even like her.
 
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15 years, been together 21, these last couple of years tho, I'm like hell, I can do this by myself. She contributes to the home, but she cooks and and is good with the kids. That's about it.
 
You ever try blowing trees famb? That og kush will have you laughing at that ****. Mess around and tell her to come master this D
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Dont give in brah. Someone exists for everyone. Just work on yourself and get in tune with the most high and all will be well.


You will. Someone will love you just put yourself out their


@louislagerfeld
-- what about yourself don't you like? What steps are you taking to improve that?


Focus on loving yourself and being happy with you. The other stuff'll be easy after that. Personal growth is the hard part.



I think I should go a little bit in depth into my post since a few of you replied. These issues come from me being bullied as a kid, physically and verbally. Being an immigrant to a new country and trying to adjust to life here was tough. I ended up going to school in the inner city and I got picked on everyday for the clothes I wore, my mannerisms, and my crooked teeth. That whole ordeal messed up my psychology and is one reason why I don't really think highly of myself.


I don't really need to work on myself physically, I've been playing sports since I was 5. It's just something I like to do, I exercise 4-5 times a week so I'm in really good shape. The only thing I would change is my height, if only I could manipulate genetics. What else can I do to be happy with myself?


In terms of women and relationships, I was just airing out the fact that I've been single for so long. Seems like I have not had any feelings in ages, and I find it hard to show affection. Sometimes I want a relationship, and sometimes I want to run through women like the guys in TAY claim to be doing. I put myself out there all the time, but there's really no one biting.


There was a shootout on my street earlier today. Me amd the fam need to move out the inner city ASAP :smh:
 
Seen her today. Don't think she expected to see me. She embraced me and I just coldy hugged her. Feeling all types of feels. This thing you call life I tell yah. I have other jawns preeing me and this one is on my mind.


400
 
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I can feel my depression coming back... :smh: :smh:

mine never left.

I thought I was never going to get out of the black hole that I was in (depression).

I was stuck in there with no way out like the titans of old for about 6 years, b. SIX. YEARS (16-22).

I once read a man can not undergo change until he feels a great amount of pain so severe that it destroys who he was.

I know this sounds depressing but death is the purest form of creation IMO. Kill the boy guise... Leave that boy who identifies with his ego & emotions behind in that dark abyss that you WILL climb out of.

I never thought I'd get out of there but slowly & surely, I'm finding my way to the sunlight one step at a time. We gon' make it brehs :pimp:

PM's are always open if you papis need someone to talk to.
 
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today I put my dog down. Wish I could've cared for her so much more. I feel so guilty seeing my friends care and love for their dog. I work full time and have night class so I could only walk her late night, get her food and treats once a month from petco, and bathe her. My family was around too but they just couldn't do enough for her. Originally, it was my younger brothers dog he brought home but he basically just left her with us. I don't know how I feel right now. Never getting a dog again
 
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today I put my dog down. Wish I could've cared for her so much more. I feel so guilty seeing my friends care and love for their dog. I work full time and have night class so I could only walk her late night, get her food and treats once a month from petco, and bathe her. My family was around too but they just couldn't do enough for her. Originally, it was my younger brothers dog he brought home but he basically just left her with us. I don't know how I feel right now. Never getting a dog again


RIP to your dog |I. I felt like I should've done more too when I had to put my dog down, but someone mentioned to me how bad she could've had it if a breeder picked her up or if no one did and she had to live her life in a shelter. I'm sure the love and care you provided made life great for her. I said I wouldn't get another dog, and it's been a couple years, but I know I will when I can dedicate the time to take care of one. Keep your head up, man.
 
I love dogs. Never had one but I have friends who have dogs and that bond is A1.

I have a friend who lost both his dogs one after the other within a couple months. Sucks, but it happens.

I def wouldn't get a dog again if I where you. My condolences nonetheless .
 
 
I can feel my depression coming back...
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mine never left.
I thought I was never going to get out of the black hole that I was in (depression).

I was stuck in there with no way out like the titans of old for about 6 years, b. SIX. YEARS (16-22).

I once read a man can not undergo change until he feels a great amount of pain so severe that it destroys who he was.

I know this sounds depressing but death is the purest form of creation IMO. Kill the boy guise... Leave that boy who identifies with his ego & emotions behind in that dark abyss that you WILL climb out of.

I never thought I'd get out of there but slowly & surely, I'm finding my way to the sunlight one step at a time. We gon' make it brehs
pimp.gif


PM's are always open if you papis need someone to talk to.
Fantastic post by Robert Demasiado Fresh

"Comfort does not build character."
 
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What a day boys...

First, I meet my son's new therapist.

I was told it was going to be a dude & I pull up just in time for the session & I see a cutie with a bootie in front of the crib & I'm like "OH."

His last therapist was a cutie too but I was strong enough to resist my urges... this one, though :smh:

Trouble, b. 

& right now I'm just chilling blowing a few bowls after a long day & my horn starts honking a grip (word to Masters of None). 

It's an essay from my BM.

When I see it's her I'm like "ah ****, ***** about to blow my high."

Instead, she's apologizing throughout the whole thing :wow:  talking about how she regrets it everyday & she knows it's too late, blah blah blah.











































































I won 8)

FDB. MOB. 

"Mark my words imma ball without ya"

[emoji]128588[/emoji]
 
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Ignore her tears and apologies, fam. You know first-hand how she tried to play you before.

Keep flourishing.
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^^ Real ****

Keep doing you & taking care of things for the lil man Rob :pimp:

Got bm troubles & my son ain't even here yet. Sucks man :smh:
 
i just checked my credit score.....


EXPERIAN: 521
Transunion: 651
Equifax: 637


i have 0 debt an a lot of money. that ******* sucks.

guess i won't be getting a regular job no time soon, but i must confess.........dont really care
 
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i just checked my credit score.....


EXPERIAN: 521
Transunion: 651
Equifax: 637


i have 0 debt an a lot of money. that ******* sucks.

guess i won't be getting a regular job no time soon, but i must confess.........dont really care

How much did you clear from the accident?

Never have to work again money?
 
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