Dating advice, tips, etc...

[sunny559]

Originally Posted by RustyShackleford

Originally Posted by ptrakarn23

i'll drop some i've heard from others,


you don't want to share too much about yourself (keep the mysteriousness factor)

asking questions (not the yes/no or short response types) to keep the conversation going

never pay for the date, always split (or else you're sending the wrong messages, aka you have nothing else to offer and you're a simp)

conversating/meeting up for coffee is definitely easier than going out for dinner etc etc because you can ditch whenever and theres wayyy less pressure




and yeah, i've been on a dry spell this whole summer, and im currently in the best shape of my life (lost about 30~ lbs over the span of a year) so my swag is at an all time high,

my problem is that i can pull numbers etc etc etc... but i've never been in a REAL relationship (no im not a virgin, i got my JO's) so i'm trying to get some advice from the more experienced cat's about this whole dating scene (basically playing hard to get?)....

thanks NT.

If you ask a woman out on a date for the first time you better be paying. When you guys are steady dating then you split the check. The coffee thing is a good piece of advice. Ask the girl about herself, that is almost a given, if you run out %%+@ to ask then ask about her childhood, like what she wanted to be when she grew up. %%+@ works almost everything. Crack jokes and try to be funny. Last thing, if the subject is on you talk about your goals for the future, girls like to know you are going somewhere, and make sure they are reachable goals not "I am on the come up in the rap game" type stuff.

i once sat with a chick at a coffee shop for a good 2-3 hours talking on 3 different occasions.

those places are my secret weapon... especially if your there first & already have a drink, girl will most of the time just go get her own.
my first "date" meeting spot is the starbucks 3 blocks from my crib...

 

[quaz]

Originally Posted by justhotkicks

Originally Posted by SNEAKERKING757

Originally Posted by ptrakarn23

never pay for the date, always split (or else you're sending the wrong messages, aka you have nothing else to offer and you're a simp)

Really?

No.

Nothing good can come out of dutch-pay on the first date.

co-sign

 

[kanyewestjayz4life]

Make sure to let her know, she is truly a person.

 

[rko2004]

Originally Posted by mytmouse76

listen to your gut/instinct...almost always right...

Unless its led you down the wrong path majority of the times before.

OP make good sound decisions. You know, no cheating, no doing things just to piss the other person off, don't get caught up with other girls. Try to stayaway from the idiotic things basically. Oh don't get sucked into peer pressure. It can kill your relationship QUICK.

DON'T CALL HER OUT HER NAME. Argue like an respectable adult and use common sense.

 

[eight2one]

be confident and yourself...i cant really offer much since each one of my relationships have tanked.

 

[bishopds]

smoke some kush. that gets everything going + the sex is crazy good.

 

[mr monday niight]

Originally Posted by ptrakarn23

i'll drop some i've heard from others,


you don't want to share too much about yourself (keep the mysteriousness factor)

asking questions (not the yes/no or short response types) to keep the conversation going

never pay for the date, always split (or else you're sending the wrong messages, aka you have nothing else to offer and you're a simp)

conversating/meeting up for coffee is definitely easier than going out for dinner etc etc because you can ditch whenever and theres wayyy less pressure




and yeah, i've been on a dry spell this whole summer, and im currently in the best shape of my life (lost about 30~ lbs over the span of a year) so my swag is at an all time high,

my problem is that i can pull numbers etc etc etc... but i've never been in a REAL relationship (no im not a virgin, i got my JO's) so i'm trying to get some advice from the more experienced cat's about this whole dating scene (basically playing hard to get?)....

thanks NT.

If shorty is feeling you..she'll pay

 

[whateversclever]

twitter is having right now a trending topic

#ruleofrelationships

some pretty good stuff on there. . go read up on it

 

[solewoman]

Originally Posted by Quaz

Originally Posted by justhotkicks

Originally Posted by SNEAKERKING757

Originally Posted by ptrakarn23

never pay for the date, always split (or else you're sending the wrong messages, aka you have nothing else to offer and you're a simp)

Really?

No.

Nothing good can come out of dutch-pay on the first date.

co-sign

qft. i appreciate guys who still practice chivalry. dont get me wrong if im dating someone i will pay on some dates. i am not expecting for dude to come outthe pocket everytime. but at least first date.

 

[silverswoosh]

Chivalry, smivalry. Whoever asked for the date should pay.

 

[stunthard]

get to the spot early and take a few shots. that'll loosen you up, and have the convo flowing better.

bring a rubber. i'm pretty sure yns, but just in case, i would.

and keep eye contact. you can stare at her boobs along with us as soon as you get around to posting pics.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Originally Posted by SoleWoman

qft. i appreciate guys who still practice chivalry. dont get me wrong if im dating someone i will pay on some dates. i am not expecting for dude to come out the pocket everytime. but at least first date.

Why should he?

 

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by ptrakarn23

i'll drop some i've heard from others,

you don't want to share too much about yourself (keep the mysteriousness factor)

asking questions (not the yes/no or short response types) to keep the conversation going

never pay for the date, always split (or else you're sending the wrong messages, aka you have nothing else to offer and you're a simp)

conversating/meeting up for coffee is definitely easier than going out for dinner etc etc because you can ditch whenever and theres wayyy less pressure


and yeah, i've been on a dry spell this whole summer, and im currently in the best shape of my life (lost about 30~ lbs over the span of a year) so my swag is at an all time high,

my problem is that i can pull numbers etc etc etc... but i've never been in a REAL relationship (no im not a virgin, i got my JO's) so i'm trying to get some advice from the more experienced cat's about this whole dating scene (basically playing hard to get?)....

thanks NT.

this is silly.
if you want to get into a REAL relationship... you don't start it out by playing games.

What matters is that you show yourself to be your own person, with your own life... make yourself available...but not drop everything at the drop of a hatavailable....and don't be needy... you call...leave a message... don't call back 2 hrs later asking her if she got your message... she'll get backto you when she can.

you CAN pay for the date... don't let these idiots tell you otherwise.. it's not a sign of being a simp... you're a simp if you use the allure ofpaying for dinner in order to get some.
Remember, dates are to get to know each other...the dinner is the 2ndary item.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Thats why I say the first few "outtings" should be something that is free or little to no money. Get to know the person (if that is your plan). Ifthat isn't your plan, then don't waste your $. Be strategic and go in for the kill.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Originally Posted by RKO2004

Originally Posted by mytmouse76

listen to your gut/instinct...almost always right...

Unless its led you down the wrong path majority of the times before.

OP make good sound decisions. You know, no cheating, no doing things just to piss the other person off, don't get caught up with other girls. Try to stay away from the idiotic things basically. Oh don't get sucked into peer pressure. It can kill your relationship QUICK.

DON'T CALL HER OUT HER NAME. Argue like an respectable adult and use common sense.

NO; don't argue with her period. No point, in the end you will ALWAYS lose that battle. No point of arguing with women, hell no point ofarguing with anyone.

 

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by SoleWoman

qft. i appreciate guys who still practice chivalry. dont get me wrong if im dating someone i will pay on some dates. i am not expecting for dude to come out the pocket everytime. but at least first date.

Why should he?

if the guy invites the girl...then he should pay...
if the girl invites the guy...then she should pay...

basic tenets of host/guest.

 

[ryeno]

this is only one small aspect of the big picture OP, but there is nothing wrong with paying, esp. if it's your first date with the lady. My secret is thatI try to do afternoon first dates (lunch is cheaper than dinner; if you wanna go the movie route, matinee prices can usually be had; etc).

You don't want to set a trend of paying for everything though, thats for sure. If the girl is into you and she says she wants to pay next time, let her. Ina good relationship, it doesn't matter who pays; it's that youre out together thats most important.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

I don't believe the, "If ____ asks _____ out then he/she should pay."

Unless it is something specific that ONE person wants to do and the other person doesn't care/feel like doing, then ok pay. But if we BOTH want to go tothe movies to see a specific movie that we have been talking about, just because someone speaks up on it shouldn't mean they should pay.

I never liked that rule.

 

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by RKO2004

Originally Posted by mytmouse76

listen to your gut/instinct...almost always right...

Unless its led you down the wrong path majority of the times before.

OP make good sound decisions. You know, no cheating, no doing things just to piss the other person off, don't get caught up with other girls. Try to stay away from the idiotic things basically. Oh don't get sucked into peer pressure. It can kill your relationship QUICK.

DON'T CALL HER OUT HER NAME. Argue like an respectable adult and use common sense.

NO; don't argue with her period. No point, in the end you will ALWAYS lose that battle. No point of arguing with women, hell no point of arguing with anyone.

that's silly.
so you're saying that all "discussions" should just end with both parties agreeing to disagree?

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by RKO2004

Originally Posted by mytmouse76

listen to your gut/instinct...almost always right...

Unless its led you down the wrong path majority of the times before.

OP make good sound decisions. You know, no cheating, no doing things just to piss the other person off, don't get caught up with other girls. Try to stay away from the idiotic things basically. Oh don't get sucked into peer pressure. It can kill your relationship QUICK.

DON'T CALL HER OUT HER NAME. Argue like an respectable adult and use common sense.

NO; don't argue with her period. No point, in the end you will ALWAYS lose that battle. No point of arguing with women, hell no point of arguing with anyone.

that's silly.
so you're saying that all "discussions" should just end with both parties agreeing to disagree?

There is a difference in ARGUING and discussing things. I never said don't have disagreements/discussions, but to ARGUE (raise voice, useimmature tactics etc...) is a pointless act and nothing good can come from it.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Originally Posted by RyeNO

this is only one small aspect of the big picture OP, but there is nothing wrong with paying, esp. if it's your first date with the lady. My secret is that I try to do afternoon first dates (lunch is cheaper than dinner; if you wanna go the movie route, matinee prices can usually be had; etc).

You don't want to set a trend of paying for everything though, thats for sure. If the girl is into you and she says she wants to pay next time, let her. In a good relationship, it doesn't matter who pays; it's that youre out together thats most important.

Yea in a RELATIONSHIP it doesn't matter, but he doesn't need to get into the habit of paying for ALL of these "1st dates"because it is "the right thing to do. We as men have too many first dates to be spending $ on ALL of them. Add that $ up and you will seriously questionwhy you do it. Again, best first date is to go somewhere where you can just talk and focus on each other.

 

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

I don't believe the, "If ____ asks _____ out then he/she should pay."

Unless it is something specific that ONE person wants to do and the other person doesn't care/feel like doing, then ok pay. But if we BOTH want to go to the movies to see a specific movie that we have been talking about, just because someone speaks up on it shouldn't mean they should pay.

I never liked that rule.

that's different though...that's not a date type of invite when people first start dating.

 

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by RKO2004

Originally Posted by mytmouse76

listen to your gut/instinct...almost always right...

Unless its led you down the wrong path majority of the times before.

OP make good sound decisions. You know, no cheating, no doing things just to piss the other person off, don't get caught up with other girls. Try to stay away from the idiotic things basically. Oh don't get sucked into peer pressure. It can kill your relationship QUICK.

DON'T CALL HER OUT HER NAME. Argue like an respectable adult and use common sense.

NO; don't argue with her period. No point, in the end you will ALWAYS lose that battle. No point of arguing with women, hell no point of arguing with anyone.

that's silly.
so you're saying that all "discussions" should just end with both parties agreeing to disagree?

There is a difference in ARGUING and discussing things. I never said don't have disagreements/discussions, but to ARGUE (raise voice, use immature tactics etc...) is a pointless act and nothing good can come from it.

eh...when people feel vehemently about something...and so does the other party... arguing is inevitable.
arguing is a way to portray the strength of conviction about the issue.

sometimes you just don't know how strongly someone feels about something until it gets to that point.

 

[jesusinjordans]

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by ptrakarn23

i'll drop some i've heard from others,

you don't want to share too much about yourself (keep the mysteriousness factor)

asking questions (not the yes/no or short response types) to keep the conversation going

never pay for the date, always split (or else you're sending the wrong messages, aka you have nothing else to offer and you're a simp)

conversating/meeting up for coffee is definitely easier than going out for dinner etc etc because you can ditch whenever and theres wayyy less pressure


and yeah, i've been on a dry spell this whole summer, and im currently in the best shape of my life (lost about 30~ lbs over the span of a year) so my swag is at an all time high,

my problem is that i can pull numbers etc etc etc... but i've never been in a REAL relationship (no im not a virgin, i got my JO's) so i'm trying to get some advice from the more experienced cat's about this whole dating scene (basically playing hard to get?)....

thanks NT.

this is silly.
if you want to get into a REAL relationship... you don't start it out by playing games.

What matters is that you show yourself to be your own person, with your own life... make yourself available...but not drop everything at the drop of a hat available....and don't be needy... you call...leave a message... don't call back 2 hrs later asking her if she got your message... she'll get back to you when she can.

you CAN pay for the date... don't let these idiots tell you otherwise.. it's not a sign of being a simp... you're a simp if you use the allure of paying for dinner in order to get some.
Remember, dates are to get to know each other...the dinner is the 2ndary item.

Co-sign, chivalry definitely isn't dead. Started stepping my game up recently, waiting outside my car, opening doors etc., little things that make a bigdifference. You definitely don't want to seem desperate, # 1 game killer I'd say, chicks can sense it right away. Call once and wait for the returncall/message, she might be testing you. And one thing I've noticed is chicks notice everything, even though they may not mention it, count on it beingtaken into mind. If you're serious about a girl, pay up. Your grease game still needs to come into play though on occasion.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

If you are serious about a girl PAY UP?