solewoman
Staff member
- Jul 27, 2006
- 19,816
- 22,218
Yep I met the love of my life in 08. But due to maturity issues it never worked. Now I'm in the service and he's in the Midwest. He was probably never right for me anyways. 
- Aug 27, 2008
- 5,315
- 3,791
Happened to me with my last two situations. One was her head messed up the other was my head messed up. Posting for later. Will try to go into further detail tomorrow
- Aug 22, 2012
- 115
- 13
- Apr 30, 2010
- 73,705
- 115,476
Sounds like you're dwelling on it op, gotta let it go. It's unhealthy to hold on to if it isn't something you can change.
- Jul 21, 2012
- 6,384
- 1,053
I think it's completely possible. I've had two girls I really would have loved to be with in later years, but it just ends due to the age. As a young person, I know that at this age nobody knows where they're going. If they say they so, it's more than likely ********. So it's hard to keep a relationship when you don't even know how to keep yourself at the time. I had a girl for three years, and it was great. I lost my own way trying to go one way, and she was going the other. So I ended it, and a few months later I end up floating back towards the direction I was going in originally. I went back and talked to her and we were right back on the same page, but we just couldn't do the whole relationship thing again. So I'd chalk that up as a girl I would have wifed later down the line.
Then the second girl, we broke up today coincidentally. We hadn't been together as long as the previous girl, but I'm telling you she was perfect. It just ended up the same way though, she is going one way, and I'm staying where I am. I respected her decision and let her go, and all I can think is how she could have been wife material if we had just met five years later. I'm going to give her space though, that's what I needed when I broke up with the first girl. Maybe she'll come back towards the middle just like I did, and maybe this time I won't beat out and actually do something about it. Right before my birthday though :/
But overall, I feel like it's completely possible to meet the right person at the wrong time, multiple times even. Because there is no set person for you to be with in life, just a person with a set number of characteristics. It just depends when you find that person, and if you find them early you just chalk up the L and find the next one eventually.
Good luck, OP, no matter which direction you follow.
Then the second girl, we broke up today coincidentally. We hadn't been together as long as the previous girl, but I'm telling you she was perfect. It just ended up the same way though, she is going one way, and I'm staying where I am. I respected her decision and let her go, and all I can think is how she could have been wife material if we had just met five years later. I'm going to give her space though, that's what I needed when I broke up with the first girl. Maybe she'll come back towards the middle just like I did, and maybe this time I won't beat out and actually do something about it. Right before my birthday though :/
But overall, I feel like it's completely possible to meet the right person at the wrong time, multiple times even. Because there is no set person for you to be with in life, just a person with a set number of characteristics. It just depends when you find that person, and if you find them early you just chalk up the L and find the next one eventually.
Good luck, OP, no matter which direction you follow.
- Nov 24, 2013
- 750
- 159
[emoji]128070[/emoji]real talk.
- Aug 22, 2012
- 115
- 13
roc boy jada
Banned
- Dec 16, 2007
- 5,287
- 300
If only I met this one girl two years earlier then when we first met. |I Started to like her, then found out she had a kid. I was crushed.
- Aug 27, 2008
- 5,315
- 3,791
Elaboration -
So with the first situation/girl,(we'll call her "Princess") I met her in early 2012 through mutual friends. She's the best fit for me on all levels (career, personality, physically, etc) and I wanted and tried to lock her down officially for a year. We dated casually, spent most of our free time with each other (we lived in different states so I'd just disappear for days at a time to her place or vice versa) talked on the phone everyday(even falling asleep), and of course engaged in some extracurricular activities, but for whatever reason she kept saying "I don't want a relationship in 2012." Of course I second guessed myself, but I knew she was pleased in all areas, but something else and it was literally her. She wouldn't talk about her past or her men issues, until I found out she smashed the homie. After that we put everything out there and I found out about her Ex and how that damaged her and so she just ended up going into her "garden tool" phase right as I got her (just my luck). Anyways after everything we actually got closer and I pulled the ultimate Man Code Violation, and tried to save her again. We were good until her EX randomly showed up at her house and then she went back to him because her brain was still messed up and confused. This was the last straw, I love this girl to death and we're actually still close to this day (without the sex) because we just get each other, but it's a prime example of right girl wrong timing because of her brain not being right.
So the second situation/girl (we'll call her "Loca") was 2 girls after the one described above, she is a coworker of mine that I had met while dealing with situation one. She's the type of girl I always wanted (loyal, beautiful, always DTF, plays video games, etc). I have a strict "no-coworker" rule, but this was broken because Loca finally convinced me to go out for drinks with her. While I was done with situation one, I replaced Princess with another girl (We'll call her "Diva"). So Diva disappeared out of nowhere so I figured whatever I'll just mess around with Loca and chill, but then I actually ended up getting to know the real Loca and not just her crazy/attitude side. I ended up falling pretty quick for her and her for me, but then Diva came back and I was messed up in the head. I didn't know what direction to go in. I ended up feeling like I owed it to myself to see where things could go with Diva so I broke it off with Loca. Loca was fighting hard to keep me, even asked me to be her boyfriend and wanted to take care of me, but I turned it down. I was going against my heart and it wasn't until the summer that I realized I messed up. Loca was the one I should've been with from jump and now she's in a place where she wants to be with me, but is in a situation that she doesn't know how to leave just like I was with Diva. This is where my head was messed up and the right girl (or the one I always wanted) came along, but I messed it up.
My true belief though is that if it's meant to be, it'll happen. So I recommend not tripping about what's in the past, but be sure if the opportunity comes again to seize the moment.
So with the first situation/girl,(we'll call her "Princess") I met her in early 2012 through mutual friends. She's the best fit for me on all levels (career, personality, physically, etc) and I wanted and tried to lock her down officially for a year. We dated casually, spent most of our free time with each other (we lived in different states so I'd just disappear for days at a time to her place or vice versa) talked on the phone everyday(even falling asleep), and of course engaged in some extracurricular activities, but for whatever reason she kept saying "I don't want a relationship in 2012." Of course I second guessed myself, but I knew she was pleased in all areas, but something else and it was literally her. She wouldn't talk about her past or her men issues, until I found out she smashed the homie. After that we put everything out there and I found out about her Ex and how that damaged her and so she just ended up going into her "garden tool" phase right as I got her (just my luck). Anyways after everything we actually got closer and I pulled the ultimate Man Code Violation, and tried to save her again. We were good until her EX randomly showed up at her house and then she went back to him because her brain was still messed up and confused. This was the last straw, I love this girl to death and we're actually still close to this day (without the sex) because we just get each other, but it's a prime example of right girl wrong timing because of her brain not being right.
So the second situation/girl (we'll call her "Loca") was 2 girls after the one described above, she is a coworker of mine that I had met while dealing with situation one. She's the type of girl I always wanted (loyal, beautiful, always DTF, plays video games, etc). I have a strict "no-coworker" rule, but this was broken because Loca finally convinced me to go out for drinks with her. While I was done with situation one, I replaced Princess with another girl (We'll call her "Diva"). So Diva disappeared out of nowhere so I figured whatever I'll just mess around with Loca and chill, but then I actually ended up getting to know the real Loca and not just her crazy/attitude side. I ended up falling pretty quick for her and her for me, but then Diva came back and I was messed up in the head. I didn't know what direction to go in. I ended up feeling like I owed it to myself to see where things could go with Diva so I broke it off with Loca. Loca was fighting hard to keep me, even asked me to be her boyfriend and wanted to take care of me, but I turned it down. I was going against my heart and it wasn't until the summer that I realized I messed up. Loca was the one I should've been with from jump and now she's in a place where she wants to be with me, but is in a situation that she doesn't know how to leave just like I was with Diva. This is where my head was messed up and the right girl (or the one I always wanted) came along, but I messed it up.
My true belief though is that if it's meant to be, it'll happen. So I recommend not tripping about what's in the past, but be sure if the opportunity comes again to seize the moment.
