Moving Out...

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Sep 20, 2006
Stress levels with parents are increasing. I don't want to hold anger towards them, but they are getting older in age, and more and more angry it seems like. My dad had to dip into his retirement fund because my little sister wanted to go out of state for school. He is salty about that. We have a big three story house and now my dad says money is getting tight - he's been helping me pay for my school as well.
Anyway, woke up this morning, heard him talking +!@+ about me basically, then when he realized I was behind him, he started stuttering and was all like "oh hey what's up?!" lol. I was like "so that's what you think when i'm not around?" Called him an +$$%#!# and we haven't spoken since. I give him no reason to be mad at me so I don't know where that is coming from.

Anyway I have 8 grand in the bank, my friends are lame and don't have enough to move. I am 
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 right now and trying to figure out what to do.

How was moving out for y'all. Expenses? Etc...
 
What city you at atm?
Expenses vary a lot depending on if you're somewhere like NYC compared to somewhere in Alabama. Either way, try and find a roommate since you're still in school because you won't be making much on your part time job (if you have one) and 8k doesn't really last that long because you gotta stay buying your own food and other stuff once you move out.

If I were you, I'd try to just deal with living at home until you get out of school.
 
if you're serious ( say this because of the funny guy in the simpsons avi)

you're going to get one or two responses

1. the people that have done so or knows someone that moved out from their parent's home that will come in here and tell you to MAN UP and work that thang out with them..cus times are hard, and you should be stacking while you're there.

2. The folks that have moved out of their parents home since the age of 18 or so, that will tell you to MAN UP, because you should have been did it, and you'll never experience what it feels like to leave the nest at a young age because you were stuck up under your folks, get some independence about yourself.

i look at it like this, no one wants to struggle, no matter if you're young or old. It's not a good feelings but sometimes that's life, and if you have choices where you can avoid moving out on your own and having to throw all of your paychecks away to bills, and rent...then go with those other choices.

yes you'll be independent, yes you can have conversations about "how you aren't living with moms and dad anymore, and you have your own spot", and yes that will seem cool to chicks that you meet......but being broke as hell in the process of having your own spot isn't worth it in the least.....
 
Dude lives in a 3 story house complaining. Go reconcile with your dad and tell him you 're moving out as soon as you finish school...........or kill your dad
 
Just deal with it man.

You moving out is only cutting off your nose to spite your face.

Bank your cash avoid your dad. At the end of the day he can say whatever he wants in his house plus he helping you with school. Why ruin a good thing? Your dad is allowed to vent.
 
Originally Posted by TroyMcClure

Stress levels with parents are increasing. I don't want to hold anger towards them, but they are getting older in age, and more and more angry it seems like. My dad had to dip into his retirement fund because my little sister wanted to go out of state for school. He is salty about that. We have a big three story house and now my dad says money is getting tight - he's been helping me pay for my school as well.
Anyway, woke up this morning, heard him talking +!@+ about me basically, then when he realized I was behind him, he started stuttering and was all like "oh hey what's up?!" lol. I was like "so that's what you think when i'm not around?" Called him an +$$%#!# and we haven't spoken since. I give him no reason to be mad at me so I don't know where that is coming from.

Anyway I have 8 grand in the bank, my friends are lame and don't have enough to move. I am 
mad.gif
 right now and trying to figure out what to do.

How was moving out for y'all. Expenses? Etc...
not sure if serious.......

I see why your dad is mad.......
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Like I tell everyone with parent problems... Appreciate your parents they wont be around forever. This is petty stuff man. Your dad said something behind your back...who cares he is your dad he can say what he wants about you. Your dad is your dad, so he has the right to say what he wants. In addition he pays for school, feeds you, and you live rent free. I would say he has the right to say what he wants. 
 
You got it made, you have a good bit saved up. But move out and that's gonna be gone asap. Finish school and move out when you're finished. Don't make unnecessary bills
 
Maybe you can help out by paying some damn rent or buy some groceries from time to time.
 
Son has 8 grand in the bank and has his pops paying for school AND he lives in a 3 story house...talking about "stress levels"
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. Boy...i wish i had your life right now. Lock this stupid thread up
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He pays for your school and doesn't require rent and you're going to move out of a 3 story house and struggle to make ends meet because he said something behind your back? C'mon son
 
and the racism on NT continues, nothing new here. 
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I'll give you some honest advice, without any insults. OP, I think moving out is a very unwise decision in your situation and is only a scenario that you should think about when money is really getting tight and your dad obviously hates your guts and upfront hates you. I think you should appreciate your dad for what he has provided you, and talk it over with him and apologize. Then explain why you were upset and that you didn't know that he really was that frustrated over family finances. 

Offer to get a job to pay for college tuition and if he really wants it, payment for the house. Moving out is no joke and providing for yourself with a low-paying job is very difficult. My oldest sister is doing this (granted she is living in expensive San Diego), and she struggled a bit with paying for food and making rent. My parents have had to bail her out several times, which I don't agree with but have no means to decide how they spend their money. 

I'm very fortunate to have parents that will pay for most of my college tuition and having a nice roof over my head. Regardless of how much my dad would hate me, I know that I would struggle hard living without his support and trying to make ends meet.

I think you are emotionally upset, which I understand, but you need to understand that he is stressed out and was venting. When my dad was unemployed back in 2009, he would have those "quiet" anger moments where he wouldn't speak or yell at anyone, but then would lash out at the rest of the family because of some little things. Having a tough financial situation is a huge burden and you have to understand that he knows that you are part of his responsibility and he means well. From what you said, your dad did soften up when he realized you were right there when he talked behind your back, and that seems like he actually does care about what you think. 

Reconsider your plan and think about how to avoid such a situation in the future.
 
- You living for free
- Your pops got his family in a 3 story house
- He paying two tuition's
- He went into his retirment so you sis could go to the school she wanted too
- You called your pops out his name in his house

And you stressed?
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You need a wake-up call kid. Go ahead and move out, bet you will appreciate you dad then.
 
Hmmm, let me ask you this OP...
Do you have a job?

I know you go to school, but do you have any way of helping around the house?

Cleaning, paying bills, yard work, etc... Something?!
 
i hear u op...but a lot of NTers are right.

your fortunate enough to make these decisions..when there are people out there who have no choice but to work and pay bills.

why make that choice, when you can get an education and live rent free...

your dad is frustrated..but let him know you are doing what you can in school...

get on a good level with your pops, your fortunate..even though it may not seem so
 
Yeah put your effort into getting on good terms with your dad. Since you already have great financial support from your fam, it's wiser to keep it until you get a lot more money for yourself.

See it as "alright the price i pay for living in this house with all the benefits is i gotta help my dad not be so angry and if i don't try it'll just suck more" then look into ways of how to help someone chill out, read some books and stuff about psychology. Then confront the problem.

But before you can go take a vacation somewhere nice to just cool off and clear your mind, coming back feeling refreshed always feels good before tackling anything.
 
I understand your stressed but at least you have a dad to be stressed with. Your best bet would be to go out a have a talk with him. Tell him how you feel and vise versa. Your living free so enjoy it, stack your money and finish school. $%*+ I havent lived for free since 17 if you want we can trade places
 
Originally Posted by brandonb2005

- You living for free
- Your pops got his family in a 3 story house
- He paying two tuition's
- He went into his retirment so you sis could go to the school she wanted too
- You called your pops out his name in his house

And you stressed?
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You need a wake-up call kid. Go ahead and move out, bet you will appreciate you dad then.
This!!< if you dont understand how good you have it compared to millions of people in America then idk man. 
If you were paying for food rent school your car and gas you wouldnt have those 8G's. Respect your father, hes been working hard for prob 30 years and taking care of you for 19 20, this world is hard. You lucky your dad is soft when it comes to his kids, i lived a nourished middle class life growing up but my pops would of dropped me if i came at him like that. 
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