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Verdict: The Scientologists are back
Rating: Turkey
Up to now, the most notorious attempt to sell us Scientology in the cinema was John Travolta’s legendary stinker, Battlefield Earth.
Will Smith — who donated $122,500 to the cause in 2007 — and his more openly Scientologist wife Jada Pinkett Smith thought they could do better. After Earth is the catastrophic end product.
A strong contender for 2013’s worst film, it educates us about several precepts of Scientology — suppress emotion, be in the present moment alone, earn the respect of your father-figure, and become a kind of human robot.
Disaster: Will Smith and son Jayden in the appalling After Earth
Disaster: Will Smith and son Jaden in the appalling After Earth
That last bit is, incidentally, terrible advice to give actors.
Not only is After Earth a tedious sermon on Dianetics, it’s as inept as you would expect from writer-director M. Night Shyamalan, not as far as I know a Scientologist, but the man responsible for three of the most ponderous and unwatchable films ever made: Lady In The Water, The Happening and The Last Airbender. This guy couldn’t direct traffic.
After Earth stars Will Smith and his 14-year-old son Jaden, and is based on a story by Will that suggests writing is definitely not his talent.
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Although Jaden was passable in his previous movie, The Karate Kid, he’s grown into an uncharismatic teenager.
He plays Kitai, a boy who is a repellent combination of cocky and whiny. He desperately wants to impress his stern military commander dad (Will) and atone for failing to rescue his teenage sister from a creature called Ursa, which — despite its name — is not in the least bit bearlike.
It’s how Tolkien’s giant spider creation Shelob might have looked, had she undergone ill-advised plastic surgery.
When the pair of them crash-land on Earth, killing their crew and breaking dad’s legs, the father is suddenly dependent on his son to rescue them. And there’s an Ursa on the loose.
The dialogue is platitudinous and delivered in stilted accents. The structure is that of a very dull video game made by someone who once watched The Lord Of The Rings.
The computer-generated special-effects are jerky: easily the worst I’ve seen in any recent blockbuster, and unforgivably amateurish.
But it’s the script that makes this a toe-curling embarrassment. Unlike Shyamalan’s previous movies, there’s not even an attempt at a twist.
Throughout the second half, the robotic Will Smith tries not to fall into a coma. He succeeds, but I’m not too sure about the audience.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbi...ists-sci-fi---Xenu-stinker.html#ixzz2VtLiB7DX
Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbi...iew-Scientologists-sci-fi---Xenu-stinker.html
Rating: Turkey
Up to now, the most notorious attempt to sell us Scientology in the cinema was John Travolta’s legendary stinker, Battlefield Earth.
Will Smith — who donated $122,500 to the cause in 2007 — and his more openly Scientologist wife Jada Pinkett Smith thought they could do better. After Earth is the catastrophic end product.
A strong contender for 2013’s worst film, it educates us about several precepts of Scientology — suppress emotion, be in the present moment alone, earn the respect of your father-figure, and become a kind of human robot.
Disaster: Will Smith and son Jayden in the appalling After Earth
Disaster: Will Smith and son Jaden in the appalling After Earth
That last bit is, incidentally, terrible advice to give actors.
Not only is After Earth a tedious sermon on Dianetics, it’s as inept as you would expect from writer-director M. Night Shyamalan, not as far as I know a Scientologist, but the man responsible for three of the most ponderous and unwatchable films ever made: Lady In The Water, The Happening and The Last Airbender. This guy couldn’t direct traffic.
After Earth stars Will Smith and his 14-year-old son Jaden, and is based on a story by Will that suggests writing is definitely not his talent.
More...
The king of bling: Brilliant acting, sumptuous costumes and a director on top form. It's criminal this Liberace biopic can't win an Oscar
The Purge: Dystopic science fiction meets horror in this ingenious family-in-peril thriller
Although Jaden was passable in his previous movie, The Karate Kid, he’s grown into an uncharismatic teenager.
He plays Kitai, a boy who is a repellent combination of cocky and whiny. He desperately wants to impress his stern military commander dad (Will) and atone for failing to rescue his teenage sister from a creature called Ursa, which — despite its name — is not in the least bit bearlike.
It’s how Tolkien’s giant spider creation Shelob might have looked, had she undergone ill-advised plastic surgery.
When the pair of them crash-land on Earth, killing their crew and breaking dad’s legs, the father is suddenly dependent on his son to rescue them. And there’s an Ursa on the loose.
The dialogue is platitudinous and delivered in stilted accents. The structure is that of a very dull video game made by someone who once watched The Lord Of The Rings.
The computer-generated special-effects are jerky: easily the worst I’ve seen in any recent blockbuster, and unforgivably amateurish.
But it’s the script that makes this a toe-curling embarrassment. Unlike Shyamalan’s previous movies, there’s not even an attempt at a twist.
Throughout the second half, the robotic Will Smith tries not to fall into a coma. He succeeds, but I’m not too sure about the audience.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbi...ists-sci-fi---Xenu-stinker.html#ixzz2VtLiB7DX
Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbi...iew-Scientologists-sci-fi---Xenu-stinker.html