Getting Over An Ex.....

[canifly34]

My story in a shell of nut:
Broke up with my ex around 2 and a half weeks ago. Reason for the breakup being we never saw each other cuz there was a lot on her plate and I was unhappy. She has a 4 yr old son which really had nothing to do with the break up but we never got the alone time we needed. With 2 jobs, coaching skating and a child she seemed to have a lot on her plate for a BF. Dated almost a year with a month break in between.

So my question for you NT is, if any of you were in long term relationships and had a messy break up, how'd you handle it? I'm off IG, contemplating staying away from twitter. Working out/hooping more. Avoiding alcohol at all costs, and any music that has depressing tones. What did you guys do? Thx brah's

 

[lil black jean jacket]

Ride my bicycle, some drugs, video games, stuff like that to keep myself busy . . time heals.

I kinda went to through the same kind of relationship last year :\


Good luck

 

[6 Rings G.O.A.T.]

Time heals.. Keep yourself occupy..

 

[lil black jean jacket]

I actually started going to the strip club alot recently for some odd reason

 

[airthompson]

Go out meet other women.

 

[travis]

Time heals.. Keep yourself occupy..

right here . as of now maybe everything you do might remind you of her . as time passes you'll move on and its not like you guys had a "messy" breakup . if it's meant to be yall will be .

 

[mahnametahrone]

Surround yourself with good people.

 

[ayem26]

We've all been there. Like previously stated, occupy yourself. Don't get caught up on the thought of her or working things out. And of course only time really gonna heal that. Until then workout, stay off her profiles, music can be cathartic (has been for me), get ya social life, a positive circle. Just stay up, all will be well

 

[DROMONTANA]

got some new/better yambs

 

[guzzy]

Cut contact.

Keep yourself occupied.

Improve thyself.

Let the feelings out if you have to.

 

[solexsup]

Do not go creeping her IG/FB/TUMBLR

It'll eat you alive b

 

[bhergh]

@rck3sactown been thinking

 

[jaysrcrak]

I would be able to think of a solution for you...
but Im too busy using my imagination. BRB

 

[Sir San Diego]

We've all been there. Like previously stated, occupy yourself. Don't get caught up on the thought of her or working things out. And of course only time really gonna heal that. Until then workout, stay off her profiles, music can be cathartic (has been for me), get ya social life, a positive circle. Just stay up, all will be well

THIS.

 

[toast1985]

Broke up with my ex over two weeks ago, myself. I think about her a lot, but honesty I've been so happy lately.

1. Self improvement. I'm focused on working out, not watching any adult films, and waking up before 6:30am

2. Removed any memory triggers. All pictures, old belongings, and social media connections.

3. Remind myself to face reality. I always think back to something Marlo (from The Wire) said..."You want it to be one way, but it's not." Simple, yet powerfully effective concept. You want things to be perfect with her, but it's not. You cannot control her, but you can control yourself and your environment. Do just that, make you the best you as a result of this process. Construct your environment, whether home or socially, to be conducive to your well being. The next female that enters your life will respect your domain. And will have to assume to your environment to fully be embraced, as opposed to the other way around, which will not work in an relationship with women.

 

[am1x90xnike]

Me, personally

Work extra hard at work, put in extra hours
Drugs
New Yambs
Avoid her; delete the number
Patience


Time doesn't necessarily 'heal' the pain, but it shows you can live without her. Idk what's I do if I even spoke with my ex. Luckily none of them will speak to me because I went super simp for a bit.

 

[nychiphophippo]

i've been in one serious relationship before.

it was HARD for me to get over it. I had a rebound chick who looked better, I lived a crazy life of partying with a billionaire friend of mine, and no matter what I'd still think of her even if i was doing the absolute dopest ****. obviously don't mope around not doing ****, but even if you are keeping busy, and have a social life it's not exactly the answer.

what eventually got me over it in addition to time was two things.

1. i came to terms that she wasn't the right girl for me. i'm the "good guy." clean cut, intelligent, deep, charmer, witty/funny. and she was a bad thick booty half-hispanic materialist who had some hood in her. we connected enough to have a serious relationship, but deep down we were an obvious mismatch.

2. this one's helped me get through a lot of **** in addition to over her. and it's my high self-worth and high confidence. i know i bring a lot to the table as a person and have a lot of desirable qualities. i'm not worried about not being able to get girls, and i'm not an old dude. i'll have plenty of opportunities to eventually find someone i click with on levels i couldn't with past shorty. it's going to take time, because i don't meet a lot of people like myself, but it'll happen and i'm not sweating it.

basically, just ask yourself if you think she was really right for you. and then think about your outlook on yourself. if you think you offer a lot then don't worry. and if you don't, then use this as motivation to make yourself better and make improvements to yourself.

edit: also try to make yourself not be dependent on a chick to be happy. we're all humans with needs, but you gotta learn how to be happy independently. i know i'll eventually get to where i want to be and get a chick who i want to be with so i'm going to enjoy life while i work toward those goals and wait for that person.

 

[hermoon]

i've been in one serious relationship before.

it was HARD for me to get over it. I had a rebound chick who looked better, I lived a crazy life of partying with a billionaire friend of mine, and no matter what I'd still think of her even if i was doing the absolute dopest ****. obviously don't mope around not doing ****, but even if you are keeping busy, and have a social life it's not exactly the answer.

what eventually got me over it in addition to time was two things.

1. i came to terms that she wasn't the right girl for me. i'm the "good guy." clean cut, intelligent, deep, charmer, witty/funny. and she was a bad thick booty half-hispanic materialist who had some hood in her. we connected enough to have a serious relationship, but deep down we were an obvious mismatch.

2. this one's helped me get through a lot of **** in addition to over her. and it's my high self-worth and high confidence. i know i bring a lot to the table as a person and have a lot of desirable qualities. i'm not worried about not being able to get girls, and i'm not an old dude. i'll have plenty of opportunities to eventually find someone i click with on levels i couldn't with past shorty. it's going to take time, because i don't meet a lot of people like myself, but it'll happen and i'm not sweating it.

basically, just ask yourself if you think she was really right for you. and then think about your outlook on yourself. if you think you offer a lot then don't worry. and if you don't, then use this as motivation to make yourself better and make improvements to yourself.

edit: also try to make yourself not be dependent on a chick to be happy. we're all humans with needs, but you gotta learn how to be happy independently. i know i'll eventually get to where i want to be and get a chick who i want to be with so i'm going to enjoy life while i work toward those goals and wait for that person.

good **** fam, especially the last part.

 

[xbraveheartx]

broke up with my ex of 3 years almost 2 months ago.. at first i guess i did regret the decision, then time settled and with that i gained more self confidence and self wisdom.

Gotta accept the position you're in right now, but whatever you do DON'T STAY HOME. STAY OCCUPIED, go gym, go do something that doesn't require you spending time ALONE. After a while you'll start finding the time to better yourself as a person. You can talk to girls, have fun and all that but I suggests not aiming for a relationship right away.. seriously have your fun. Vent to your best friend if you need to, just do anything to release steam or any emotions away.

At the same time, you gotta understand that from this situation, their is always something to learn. This relationship and prior relationships should help you realize what type of girl you do want and don't. Also stay away from Social Media, hide any pictures, you gotta isolate yourself man.

Hang in there

#teamsingle

 

[teamjordan79]

broke up with my ex of 3 years almost 2 months ago.. at first i guess i did regret the decision, then time settled and with that i gained more self confidence and self wisdom.

Gotta accept the position you're in right now, but whatever you do DON'T STAY HOME. STAY OCCUPIED, go gym, go do something that doesn't require you spending time ALONE. After a while you'll start finding the time to better yourself as a person. You can talk to girls, have fun and all that but I suggests not aiming for a relationship right away.. seriously have your fun. Vent to your best friend if you need to, just do anything to release steam or any emotions away.

At the same time, you gotta understand that from this situation, their is always something to learn. This relationship and prior relationships should help you realize what type of girl you do want and don't. Also stay away from Social Media, hide any pictures, you gotta isolate yourself man.

Hang in there

#teamsingle

either this or a drake cd and a razorblade....ur choice OP

 

[Mister Meaner]

I just went through a break up too OP, even made a thread on NT about it. Those first few weeks were horrible. It really doesn't matter how busy you keep yourself; there will always be time to think, reminisce, and wonder what could have been. Eventually, you just have to come to terms with the situation and turn your negative experience into a learning experience, thus makingc it positive. You learn about what works for you in a relationship and what doesn't.

I will agree that you shouldn't go looking for another relationship. Enjoy the benefits of being a single man. Seek out new yambs and conquer as much as possible (while being safe). Focus on yourself, spend money on yourself, get selfish in that regard. I hit the gym too and am trying to live a healthier lifestyle. Do things to make you feel good about yourself. Eventually, you begin to think less and less of your relationship.

 

[fontaine]

Hate to be insensivite but...

What did you expect dealing with a chick with a kid that was 2.5 years old?

On top of that, baby daddy was still around too... Prolly coaxing her into other decisions.

What is the current state of the baby's father? Does he take care of the kid? Pay child support? Is he a goon? A thug? A dead beat dad?

These types of things generally tell you what kind of yamb you're dealing with....

Also, how old are you? Getting into a serious relationship under 25... Odds aren't in your favor...

Throw in a kid and its double trouble... There are plenty of cool chicks that don't have the kid their...

Nb4 someone takes my statements and think I'm saying all relationships under 25 don't work, all chicks with kids don't work, and if the baby daddy ain't ****, the mama ain't ****.

 

[fontaine]

broke up with my ex of 3 years almost 2 months ago.. at first i guess i did regret the decision, then time settled and with that i gained more self confidence and self wisdom.

Gotta accept the position you're in right now, but whatever you do DON'T STAY HOME. STAY OCCUPIED, go gym, go do something that doesn't require you spending time ALONE. After a while you'll start finding the time to better yourself as a person. You can talk to girls, have fun and all that but I suggests not aiming for a relationship right away.. seriously have your fun. Vent to your best friend if you need to, just do anything to release steam or any emotions away.

At the same time, you gotta understand that from this situation, their is always something to learn. This relationship and prior relationships should help you realize what type of girl you do want and don't. Also stay away from Social Media, hide any pictures, you gotta isolate yourself man.

Hang in there

#teamsingle

this man gets it...

Plus.... Being single and young is pretty dope...

Variety is the spice of life, kinfoe... Get yambs...

Don't care what people say... For most guys, superficial yambs will make you feel better.

Trust me bro.

 

[miniojw]

I actually started going to the strip club alot recently for some odd reason

I think this is counter productive. Almost like your looking for validation from a women to feel wanted. IMO.

 

[secretzofwar]

I haven't done this in a while, but my game plan was similar to people in here.

Work ( a lot) - takes your mind off of the situation and you make some extra cash to boost your self esteem

Gym - another confidence builder and time occupier.

New women - you don't have to be smashing left and right, but meeting and hanging out with new women always always always helps. You realize there a are a lot of cool chicks out there that you'll find interesting and different.

Friends - use the freedom to get in touch with old friends you may have pushed aside for the relationship.

Best of luck and hang in there, it'll all be fine