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- Sep 23, 2008
Buttons McBoomBoom wrote:Dear Sarah,
Thank you for your concern. I'll be sure to file it away under 'L' for
'Long-winded diatribes from drunken #@+$*% I couldn't care less about'.
You did a stupid thing huh?
No...doing long division and forgetting to carry the one is 'a stupid
thing'; Mixing in a red Sock with a load of whites is 'a stupid thing';
Blowing some guy in a bathroom for 45 minutes while I sit at the bar
wondering if you're taking so long because you ate too much raisin bran
that morning isn't as much a 'Stupid thing' as it is grounds for
permanent removal from my social calendar. To be honest, I'm not sure if
it was more amusing that you went and degraded yourself in a public
toilet not once, but twice in a 2 hour span, or that you seemed to think
that by saying 'Well, I didn't F him' somehow gave you a clean slate.
So forgive me if I couldn't care less if the world 'looked funny' to you
yesterday. Since your World revolves around blow dryers, golden
retrievers, Prada Bags and Jelly Beans, I'm sure it must have been most
unsettling to actually have to consider someone else's feelings for 24
hours straight. The good news for you is that my friends don't think
you're a terrible person, they just think you're the average run of the
mill c-m-guzzling blonde who commands about as much respect as your
average child porn collector.
By the way, for the amount of time you claim to spend in spin class you
really must be doing something wrong to sport the thunder thighs you do.
Watching you parade around my bedroom in a thong was a little like
watching sea lions mate. Thought you might like to know.
PS. I forwarded this email to about 100 people.
Talk to you never,
Tom