My Complaint about Nike

nextel cup

Banned
325
10
Joined Mar 25, 2009
The nature and extent of our current national crisis, as well as its causes and cures, are the subject of intense political struggle. I offer this letter asa contribution to that struggle and debate in hopes of helping to prevent the production of a new crop of revolting theologasters. I assume you already knowthat the lockstep ideological conformity of Nike's functionaries and their mindless parroting of Nike's surly cliches about corporatism have reached alevel of absurdity hardly matched by any historical example that comes to mind, but I have something more important to tell you. To bring the matter closer tohome, let me remind you that one of Nike's serfs once said, "Nike has mystical powers of divination and prophecy." Now that's pretty funny,of course, but I didn't include that quote just to make you laugh. I included it to convince you that Nike says that granting it complete control over ourlives is as important as breathing air. That's its unvarying story, and it's a lie: an extremely otiose and unprincipled lie. Unfortunately, it's alie that is accepted unquestioningly, uncritically, by Nike's backers.

Let me put it this way: if Nike were to get its hands on the levers of power it'd immediately effectuate the downfall of all that is decent andcivilized. If you don't believe me then consider that it is trying to poison the relationship between teacher and student. Their mission? To demand thatloyalty to semi-intelligible slobs supersedes personal loyalty. On a more personal note, Nike thinks that merit is adequately measured by its methods andqualifications. However, it is completely unaware of the difference between a correlation and a causation. This is a free country, and I assert we ought tokeep it that way. Wretched invidious-types don't really want me to catalogue Nike's swindles and perversions, although, of course, they all have to paylip service to the idea.

Given what I know about pea-brained jackanapes, I can say with confidence that Nike's statements such as "Nike's expositions are HolyWrit" indicate that we're not all looking at the same set of facts. Fortunately, these facts are easily verifiable with a trip to the library by anyopen and honest individual. From this perspective, the biggest difference between me and Nike is that Nike wants to replace intellectual integrity withpatronizing sloganeering. I, on the other hand, want to point out the glaring contradiction between its idealized view of diabolism and reality. You may bepicking up on something here in all of my responses to Nike's incontinent ideals. All of my responses presume that Nike somehow manages to get away withspreading lies (governments should have the right to lie to their own subjects or to other governments), distortions (anyone who dares to develop analternative community, a cohesive and comprehensive underground with a charter to overcome the obstacles that people like it establish, can expect to sufferhair loss and tooth decay as a result), and misplaced idealism (it can make all of our problems go away merely by sprinkling some sort of magic, pink, pixiedust over everything that it considers purblind or insufferable). However, when I try to respond in kind, I get censored faster than you can say"indistinguishability".

It's clearly astounding that Nike has somehow found a way to work the words "internationalization" and "chronocinematography" intoits warnings. However, you may find it even more astounding that it is on some sort of thesaurus-fueled rampage. Every sentence Nike writes is filled withneedlessly long words like "microcrystallography" and "phoneticogrammatical". Either it is deliberately trying to confuse us or elseit's secretly scheming to rob, steal, cheat, and murder. The irony is that Nike's most merciless Ponzi schemes are also its most gutless. As the Frenchsay, "Les extremes se touchent."

Whatever should be true of statutory and often ephemeral enactments in human jurisprudence, the fact remains that if we don't remove the Nike threatnow, it will bite us in our backside within a short period of time. As I've said before, I fully intend to search for solutions that are more creative andconstructive than the typically daft ones championed by the most brain-damaged mob bosses you'll ever see. That's the path that I have chosen. It'sdefinitely not an easy path but then again, Nike thinks we want it to infiltrate the media with the express purpose of disseminating dysfunctional information.Excuse me, but maybe it and I are as different as chalk and cheese. Nike, for instance, wants to place our children at imminent risk of serious harm. I, on theother hand, want to take action. That's why I need to tell you that I recently overheard a couple of morally crippled euphuists say that obscurity,evasiveness, incomprehensibility, indirectness, and ambiguity are marks of depth and brilliance. Here, again, we encounter the blurred thinking that ischaracteristic of this Nike-induced era of slogans and propaganda. That's all I'm going to say in this letter because if I were to write everything Iwant to write, I'd be here all night.
 
4,625
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Joined Apr 1, 2009
I respectfull request that you kindly revise your rather lengthy story into the Notes of Cliff. Thank you fine sir.
 
820
10
Joined Jul 13, 2006
I only read the first sentence of each paragraph. Just sounds like youlike using big words. If someone at Nike does read it they will just say
"what does this dork know"
 
1,011
10
Joined Jun 24, 2007
Originally Posted by NEXTEL CUP


The nature and extent of our current national crisis, as well as its causes and cures, are the subject of intense political struggle. I offer this letter as a contribution to that struggle and debate in hopes of helping to prevent the production of a new crop of revolting theologasters. I assume you already know that the lockstep ideological conformity of Nike's functionaries and their mindless parroting of Nike's surly cliches about corporatism have reached a level of absurdity hardly matched by any historical example that comes to mind, but I have something more important to tell you. To bring the matter closer to home, let me remind you that one of Nike's serfs once said, "Nike has mystical powers of divination and prophecy." Now that's pretty funny, of course, but I didn't include that quote just to make you laugh. I included it to convince you that Nike says that granting it complete control over our lives is as important as breathing air. That's its unvarying story, and it's a lie: an extremely otiose and unprincipled lie. Unfortunately, it's a lie that is accepted unquestioningly, uncritically, by Nike's backers.

Let me put it this way: if Nike were to get its hands on the levers of power it'd immediately effectuate the downfall of all that is decent and civilized. If you don't believe me then consider that it is trying to poison the relationship between teacher and student. Their mission? To demand that loyalty to semi-intelligible slobs supersedes personal loyalty. On a more personal note, Nike thinks that merit is adequately measured by its methods and qualifications. However, it is completely unaware of the difference between a correlation and a causation. This is a free country, and I assert we ought to keep it that way. Wretched invidious-types don't really want me to catalogue Nike's swindles and perversions, although, of course, they all have to pay lip service to the idea.

Given what I know about pea-brained jackanapes, I can say with confidence that Nike's statements such as "Nike's expositions are Holy Writ" indicate that we're not all looking at the same set of facts. Fortunately, these facts are easily verifiable with a trip to the library by any open and honest individual. From this perspective, the biggest difference between me and Nike is that Nike wants to replace intellectual integrity with patronizing sloganeering. I, on the other hand, want to point out the glaring contradiction between its idealized view of diabolism and reality. You may be picking up on something here in all of my responses to Nike's incontinent ideals. All of my responses presume that Nike somehow manages to get away with spreading lies (governments should have the right to lie to their own subjects or to other governments), distortions (anyone who dares to develop an alternative community, a cohesive and comprehensive underground with a charter to overcome the obstacles that people like it establish, can expect to suffer hair loss and tooth decay as a result), and misplaced idealism (it can make all of our problems go away merely by sprinkling some sort of magic, pink, pixie dust over everything that it considers purblind or insufferable). However, when I try to respond in kind, I get censored faster than you can say "indistinguishability".

It's clearly astounding that Nike has somehow found a way to work the words "internationalization" and "chronocinematography" into its warnings. However, you may find it even more astounding that it is on some sort of thesaurus-fueled rampage. Every sentence Nike writes is filled with needlessly long words like "microcrystallography" and "phoneticogrammatical". Either it is deliberately trying to confuse us or else it's secretly scheming to rob, steal, cheat, and murder. The irony is that Nike's most merciless Ponzi schemes are also its most gutless. As the French say, "Les extremes se touchent."

Whatever should be true of statutory and often ephemeral enactments in human jurisprudence, the fact remains that if we don't remove the Nike threat now, it will bite us in our backside within a short period of time. As I've said before, I fully intend to search for solutions that are more creative and constructive than the typically daft ones championed by the most brain-damaged mob bosses you'll ever see. That's the path that I have chosen. It's definitely not an easy path but then again, Nike thinks we want it to infiltrate the media with the express purpose of disseminating dysfunctional information. Excuse me, but maybe it and I are as different as chalk and cheese. Nike, for instance, wants to place our children at imminent risk of serious harm. I, on the other hand, want to take action. That's why I need to tell you that I recently overheard a couple of morally crippled euphuists say that obscurity, evasiveness, incomprehensibility, indirectness, and ambiguity are marks of depth and brilliance. Here, again, we encounter the blurred thinking that is characteristic of this Nike-induced era of slogans and propaganda. That's all I'm going to say in this letter because if I were to write everything I want to write, I'd be here all night.
cool story bro
 
820
10
Joined Jul 13, 2006
Originally Posted by bud dink

Originally Posted by NEXTEL CUP


The nature and extent of our current national crisis, as well as its causes and cures, are the subject of intense political struggle. I offer this letter as a contribution to that struggle and debate in hopes of helping to prevent the production of a new crop of revolting theologasters. I assume you already know that the lockstep ideological conformity of Nike's functionaries and their mindless parroting of Nike's surly cliches about corporatism have reached a level of absurdity hardly matched by any historical example that comes to mind, but I have something more important to tell you. To bring the matter closer to home, let me remind you that one of Nike's serfs once said, "Nike has mystical powers of divination and prophecy." Now that's pretty funny, of course, but I didn't include that quote just to make you laugh. I included it to convince you that Nike says that granting it complete control over our lives is as important as breathing air. That's its unvarying story, and it's a lie: an extremely otiose and unprincipled lie. Unfortunately, it's a lie that is accepted unquestioningly, uncritically, by Nike's backers.

Let me put it this way: if Nike were to get its hands on the levers of power it'd immediately effectuate the downfall of all that is decent and civilized. If you don't believe me then consider that it is trying to poison the relationship between teacher and student. Their mission? To demand that loyalty to semi-intelligible slobs supersedes personal loyalty. On a more personal note, Nike thinks that merit is adequately measured by its methods and qualifications. However, it is completely unaware of the difference between a correlation and a causation. This is a free country, and I assert we ought to keep it that way. Wretched invidious-types don't really want me to catalogue Nike's swindles and perversions, although, of course, they all have to pay lip service to the idea.

Given what I know about pea-brained jackanapes, I can say with confidence that Nike's statements such as "Nike's expositions are Holy Writ" indicate that we're not all looking at the same set of facts. Fortunately, these facts are easily verifiable with a trip to the library by any open and honest individual. From this perspective, the biggest difference between me and Nike is that Nike wants to replace intellectual integrity with patronizing sloganeering. I, on the other hand, want to point out the glaring contradiction between its idealized view of diabolism and reality. You may be picking up on something here in all of my responses to Nike's incontinent ideals. All of my responses presume that Nike somehow manages to get away with spreading lies (governments should have the right to lie to their own subjects or to other governments), distortions (anyone who dares to develop an alternative community, a cohesive and comprehensive underground with a charter to overcome the obstacles that people like it establish, can expect to suffer hair loss and tooth decay as a result), and misplaced idealism (it can make all of our problems go away merely by sprinkling some sort of magic, pink, pixie dust over everything that it considers purblind or insufferable). However, when I try to respond in kind, I get censored faster than you can say "indistinguishability".

It's clearly astounding that Nike has somehow found a way to work the words "internationalization" and "chronocinematography" into its warnings. However, you may find it even more astounding that it is on some sort of thesaurus-fueled rampage. Every sentence Nike writes is filled with needlessly long words like "microcrystallography" and "phoneticogrammatical". Either it is deliberately trying to confuse us or else it's secretly scheming to rob, steal, cheat, and murder. The irony is that Nike's most merciless Ponzi schemes are also its most gutless. As the French say, "Les extremes se touchent."

Whatever should be true of statutory and often ephemeral enactments in human jurisprudence, the fact remains that if we don't remove the Nike threat now, it will bite us in our backside within a short period of time. As I've said before, I fully intend to search for solutions that are more creative and constructive than the typically daft ones championed by the most brain-damaged mob bosses you'll ever see. That's the path that I have chosen. It's definitely not an easy path but then again, Nike thinks we want it to infiltrate the media with the express purpose of disseminating dysfunctional information. Excuse me, but maybe it and I are as different as chalk and cheese. Nike, for instance, wants to place our children at imminent risk of serious harm. I, on the other hand, want to take action. That's why I need to tell you that I recently overheard a couple of morally crippled euphuists say that obscurity, evasiveness, incomprehensibility, indirectness, and ambiguity are marks of depth and brilliance. Here, again, we encounter the blurred thinking that is characteristic of this Nike-induced era of slogans and propaganda. That's all I'm going to say in this letter because if I were to write everything I want to write, I'd be here all night.
cool story bro
Did you have to quote that mess? oh wait just trying to boost your post count.
 
1,329
11
Joined Jan 4, 2009
As you will soon discover, this letter does not fixate on a single topic or subject. To be perfectly frank and honest, it started out ratherfocused but I soon found, as I worked on my primary hypothesis and sought corroboration from other sources, that I have quite a number of different things tosay about Nike. Before I launch into my main topic, I want to make a few matters crystal-clear: (1) We can't let Nike enrich itself at taxpayer expense,and (2) as a result of that, Nike gets its cause-and-effect relationships all mixed up. Now that you know where I stand on those issues, I can safely say thatNike is more than merely vitriolic. It's über-vitriolic. In fact, Nike's so vitriolic that its traducements cannot stand on their own merit. That'swhy they're dependent on elaborate artifices and explanatory stories to convince us that things have never been better. One can usually be pretty sure whenNike's lying. Sometimes there's a little doubt: maybe it's not a deliberate lie but merely a difference of opinion. But when Nike claims that itscoprophagous, sadistic club is a respected civil-rights organization, there's no room for ambiguity: it's lying.

Nike wants to make poststructuralism socially acceptable. What's wrong with that? What's wrong is Nike's gossamer grasp ofreality. Nike should hide its head in shame before the judgment of future generations, whose tongue it will no longer be possible to stop and which, therefore,will say what today all of us know to be true: Nike plans to legitimize the fear and hatred of the privileged for the oppressed. What can you do about that?Start by reading about how I obviously gainsay Nike's notion that it does the things it does "for the children". Become informed about thedeceit, lies, and propanganda surrounding Nike's promotion of Stalinism. Tell everyone you know that it is firmly convinced that human life is expendable.Its belief is controverted, however, by the weight of the evidence indicating that it's unfortunate that Nike has no real morals. It's impossible todebate important topics with organizations that are so ethically handicapped.

Although the proper definition of "premisrepresentation" is hotly disputed, I am convinced that there will be a strong effort onNike's part to transform our little community into a global crucible of terror and gore in the immediate years ahead. This effort will be disguised, ofcourse. It will be cloaked in deceit, as such efforts always are. That's why I'm informing you that now that I've been exposed to Nike'ssubliminal psywar campaigns I must admit that I don't completely understand them. Perhaps I need to get out more. Or perhaps we must free people from thefetters of cronyism's poisonous embrace. If we fail then all of our sacrifices and all of the dreams and sacrifices of our ancestors will have been invain. The key is to realize that I see how important Nike's brutal histrionics are to its patsies and I laugh. I laugh because if my memory serves mecorrectly, I can guarantee the readers of this letter that it likes to cite poll results that "prove" that five-crystal orgone generators caneliminate mind-control energies that are being radiated from secret, underground, government facilities. Really? Have you ever been contacted by one of itspollsters? Chances are good that you never have been contacted and never will be. Otherwise, the polls would show that we mustn't let Nike perpetuate whatwe all know is a corrupt system. That would be like letting the Mafia serve as a new national police force in Italy.

It may seem senseless to say that pride and solidarity prepare individuals to become partners in an alliance against loathsome, recklesscharlatanism. Nevertheless, the position can be defended. More to the point, ever since Nike decided to crush people to the earth and then claim the right totrample on them forever because they are prostrate, its consistent, unvarying line has been that the moon is made of green cheese. Nike is like a giant octopussprawling its slimy length over city, state, and nation. Like the octopus of real life, it operates under cover of self-created screen. Nike seizes in its longand powerful tentacles our executive officers, our legislative bodies, our schools, our courts, our newspapers, and every agency created for the publicprotection. Nike thinks I'm trying to say that cannibalism, wife-swapping, and the murder of infants and the elderly are acceptable behavior. Wait! I justheard something. Oh, never mind; it's just the sound of the point zooming way over Nike's head.

How dare Nike leave a large part of this country's workforce dislocated and disillusioned? Pardon my saying so, but Nike likes to bragabout how the members of its lynch mob are ideologically diverse. Perhaps that means that some of them prefer Stalin over Hitler. In any case, on a televisionprogram last night, I heard one of this country's top scientists conclude that, "Nike's ideologies are so nebulous and malleable that they can beused to justify any lawless conjectures." That's exactly what I have so frequently argued and I am pleased to have my view confirmedby so eminent an individual.

Nike's vaporings are just another signpost marking our long, steep cultural descent. That's clear. But someone has to be willing toconvert retreat into advance. Even if it's not polite to do so. Even if it hurts a lot of people's feelings. Even if everyone else is pretending thatwe should be grateful for the precious freedom to be robbed and kicked in the face by such a noble creature as Nike. Here's an idea: Instead of giving Nikethe ability to show a clear lack of respect not just for those brave souls who fought and died for what they believed in but also for you, the readers of thisletter, why don't we make the world safe for democracy? If we do, we'll then be able to treat the blows of circumstance.

What can I do to prove to you that our current parlous situation is the result of a toxic combination of Nike's recklessness and itsfans' cupidity? Show you evidence that evil prevails when good people do nothing? While that would unmistakably help, I hate it when people get their factswrong. For instance, whenever I hear some corporate fat cat make noises about how the rest of us are an inferior group of people, fit only to be enslaved,beaten, and butchered at the whim of our betters, I can't help but think that one of Nike's favorite tricks is to create a problem and then to offerthe solution. Naturally, it's always its solutions that grant it the freedom to treat people's bona fide personal devastation as bathos, neverthe original problem.

Nike makes a lot of exaggerated claims. All of these claims need to be scrutinized as carefully as a letter of recommendation from a jobapplicant's mother. Consider, for example, Nike's claim that adversarialism is a wonderful thing. The fact of the matter is that I want to look at oursituation realistically and from a viewpoint that takes in the whole picture. I want to do this not because I need to tack another line onto my résumé butbecause its values are based on a denial of reality, on the substitution of a deliberately falsified picture of the world in place of reality. And thisdishonesty, this refusal to admit the truth, will have some very serious consequences for all of us any day now. I have been a veritable oasis of civility inthe present debate. The same holds true for barbaric rascals.

To those demonic hoodwinkers who think that Nike's rantings prevent smallpox, know this: Much of the noise made on Nike's behalf isgenerated by foul, shambolic crooks who seem to have nothing better to do with their time. (Yes, I undoubtedly hope that Nike's punishment fits its crime,but that's a different story.) Nike has written more than its fair share of lengthy, over-worded, pseudo-intellectual tripe. In all such instances itconveniently overlooks the fact that it hates it when you say that my concern and outrage are not directed solely at it, but at all those who seek to arouseinter-ethnic suspicion. It really hates it when you say that. Try saying that to it sometime if you have a thick skin and don't mind having it shriekinsults at you.

I want to keep this brief: Nike's initiatives always follow the same pattern. It puts the desired twist on the actual facts, ignoresinconvenient facts, and invents as many new "facts" as necessary to convince us that everyone with a different set of beliefs from its is going toget a one-way ticket to Hell. Nike can fool some of the people all of the time. It can fool all of the people some of the time. But it can't fool all ofthe people all of the time. Finally, whatever your thoughts or feelings about Nike are, I urge you to help me give our young people the values that willinspire them to fight scurrility and slander.
 
8,516
1,580
Joined Jan 17, 2007
Originally Posted by NEXTEL CUP


It's clearly astounding that Nike has somehow found a way to work the words "internationalization" and "chronocinematography" into its warnings. However, you may find it even more astounding that it is on some sort of thesaurus-fueled rampage. Every sentence Nike writes is filled with needlessly long words like "microcrystallography" and "phoneticogrammatical". Either it is deliberately trying to confuse us or else it's secretly scheming to rob, steal, cheat, and murder. The irony is that Nike's most merciless Ponzi schemes are also its most gutless. As the French say, "Les extremes se touchent."

I don't know why, but reading "As the French say..." after a paragraph of utter foolishness had me
...
 
4,967
11
Joined Jun 24, 2004
It's clearly astounding that Nike has somehow found a way to work the words "internationalization" and "chronocinematography" into its warnings. However, you may find it even more astounding that it is on some sort of thesaurus-fueled rampage. Every sentence Nike writes is filled with needlessly long words like "microcrystallography" and "phoneticogrammatical". Either it is deliberately trying to confuse us or else it's secretly scheming to rob, steal, cheat, and murder. The irony is that Nike's most merciless Ponzi schemes are also its most gutless. As the French say, "Les extremes se touchent."
 
10,305
85
Joined Jun 28, 2007
Im usually one to read long passages that you guys write, but that !**+?? Na Im not reading that. I tried but idk whoever wrote that was trying too hard withall their big words and such. I dont even care for cliff notes at this point
 
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