Need your Prayers for my Dad

[1995]

Very sorry to hear about your dad man...my condolences

My family went through very similar situations when my dad passed so if you want to vent or just chat about things please feel free to PM me

 

[Fozz]

I'm sorry for your loss, you go boy . Prayers to you and your family during this time.

I'm hear to listen if you need it.

 

[noskey]

I'm sorry to hear the outcome. Your dad fought and it's good that he was able to be surrounded by his family. Hope you all are doing as best as you can, all things considered.

 

[you go boy]

So it's official now... My sister and my mom and me we stayed last night and slept in the room to hang out with my dad...the nurses were giving him meds but it was just prolonging his life... This morning during breakfast we had the chat to stop the meds and pull the plug from the dialysis and ventilator so he doesn't suffer...I said my goodbyes and I said I love him and thanked him for being a great dad....it was tough for me cuz now it's official... But rip to my dad 6/2/53 - 8/19/23

 

[6 Rings G.O.A.T.]

Rest in peace to your Father.

My condolences.

 

[putting in work]

Rest in peace to your Dad.

 

[va757va]

so sorry to hear that man…i lost my pops in 2017 during heart surgery…

hang in there bro…and keep his memory and the man alive thru you!!!

i’m so sorry for your loss man…reach out if you need to…

 

[ccastro02]

So heartbreaking. Rip to your dad. Fought to the very last breath. I’m so sorry for your loss.

 

[206to813]

Sorry for your loss fam

Stay strong, continue his legacy & make him proud

 

[you go boy]

Long read

I just wanted to thank everyone on NT that has reached out to me on PM, asked how I was doing, asked how my dad was and giving your condolences... it has definitely helped me out a ton... just reading your messages made me feel a lot better...its definitely going to take some time to grieve...

as soon as I got to my parents house I started getting emotional seeing all my dads stuff in the house knowing hes not going to be around anymore... There was some pictures of my dad and I moved it around the house so it can be seen as soon as you walk in which makes me feel better knowing hes still around...

I told my manager at work and I will take some bereavement for three days and go to work Thursday... I will go to the beach tomorrow and just reflect and relax then on Monday I will help my mom with the death certificate and go to the funeral home to plan transporting his body from Philly to NJ and do cremation...

My mom wants to do something private being that all my family is either in the Phillippines or in Cali so she doesnt want them to travel all the way here just for us three... my aunt (dads sister) wanted to visit us but we told her its ok since shes out in LA and my dad passed already so she cant see him...

Right now just going to go out and get lunch at a restaurant... I just wanted to have us three together to just be supportive of the situation since its so fresh... plus my dad always liked when all of us are together... my sister lives an hour plus from me so we hardly see her...

just wanted to say thanks again NT.. I love yall foreal!!

 

[eracism]

condolences to you and your family

 

[aepps20]

I am so very sorry for your loss. Prayers for you and your family as you navigate the grief journey. NT was there for me when my mom died and we will be there for you.

1. So many NTers helped me get through and so many said such uplifting things. I go back to what Methodical Management said when he said don’t look at the loss of your father like he lost a fight or his battle to get well but remember that he is living through you and that he lived and loved the best he could and he would want you to live.

2. Grief has no timeline or playbook. You will feel all kinds of emotions (sadness, anger, frustration) and that’s ok. It also takes as long as it takes. Don’t let anyone rush you through grief because you will have more problems that way. It will take time and you will never feel like you did when your dad was alive but you will find a new normal.

3. See a grief counselor asap. I’m not ashamed to say that I couldn’t get through my mom’s passing without seeing a grief counselor. I had lost other people before her but she was my best friend in addition to being my mom. It was rough and it took my NT family to give me the strength to actually see someone. elpablo21 RustyShackleford Methodical Management and others mentioned counseling several times. Please don’t self medicate with alcohol or drugs.

4. Your relationships with other family members (your mom and sister) will change and that’s ok. One nasty side effect of grief is getting angry at family for what they did or didn’t do when your dad was in the hospital. This doesn’t help and will only cause the grief to last longer. I got really angry at my two sisters because for two years I went with my dad to every chemo session, surgery and set back and neither sister stepped up in my mind. The reality was that what they did it didn’t do wasn’t going to change the outcome so I needed to move on. Do everything you can to prevent this outcome even if it means setting up boundaries and being less present.



5. Your job is to make sure that you are fine. Your mom and sister will be fine but before you can help them you need to help yourself.

6. People will stop calling as much after a few months which is normal but that doesn’t mean that you should be over it by then.

7. My counselor told me that losing a person we dearly love is like losing a limb. You won’t ever get that limb back but you will learn to live without it in time.

8. If you need to cry you cry. Don’t hold anything in. I think I cried every day for several months after mom died.

 

[smedroc]

When you post your well wishes at the start of these threads you pray things don't turn out this way...

I wish you and your family all the best going forward.

 

[unkn0wn]

Welp it looks like today is the end of the road...my dad had the ecmo machine removed this Wednesday so he was on the two life support machines instead of four...I thought he was on the right path... Then my mom talked to the nurse and said there's not much more they can do... Then the Dr told us to go to the hospital ASAP to say goodbye... My sister was already there and me and my mom came a few hours later...they said that he's not responsive and his blood rate is going down slowly and multiple organ failures so they asked my fam what we wanted to do... So my mom said to give him pain medicine so he won't suffer or have pain while he dies... So now we are just saying our goodbyes while the inevitable happens... The priest already came to give their prayers...just wanted to let y'all know everything... I'm trying to stay strong... It was tough for me to say goodbye without being emotional...

I'm late but want to send my condolences to you and your family. Just know that your father didn't die alone and yall supported him the entire way. Not everyone can say that. It will get easier with time. RIP to your pops . Here if you need someone to talk to that's in a similar situation.

 

[TURBO UNO]

unkn0wn how are you doing? I remember you have a loved one with health problem as well.

 

[MakeNTGreatAgain]

Long read

I just wanted to thank everyone on NT that has reached out to me on PM, asked how I was doing, asked how my dad was and giving your condolences... it has definitely helped me out a ton... just reading your messages made me feel a lot better...its definitely going to take some time to grieve...

as soon as I got to my parents house I started getting emotional seeing all my dads stuff in the house knowing hes not going to be around anymore... There was some pictures of my dad and I moved it around the house so it can be seen as soon as you walk in which makes me feel better knowing hes still around...

I told my manager at work and I will take some bereavement for three days and go to work Thursday... I will go to the beach tomorrow and just reflect and relax then on Monday I will help my mom with the death certificate and go to the funeral home to plan transporting his body from Philly to NJ and do cremation...

My mom wants to do something private being that all my family is either in the Phillippines or in Cali so she doesnt want them to travel all the way here just for us three... my aunt (dads sister) wanted to visit us but we told her its ok since shes out in LA and my dad passed already so she cant see him...

Right now just going to go out and get lunch at a restaurant... I just wanted to have us three together to just be supportive of the situation since its so fresh... plus my dad always liked when all of us are together... my sister lives an hour plus from me so we hardly see her...

just wanted to say thanks again NT.. I love yall foreal!!

much love fam, condolences <3

 

[danikerhino]

Long read

I just wanted to thank everyone on NT that has reached out to me on PM, asked how I was doing, asked how my dad was and giving your condolences... it has definitely helped me out a ton... just reading your messages made me feel a lot better...its definitely going to take some time to grieve...

as soon as I got to my parents house I started getting emotional seeing all my dads stuff in the house knowing hes not going to be around anymore... There was some pictures of my dad and I moved it around the house so it can be seen as soon as you walk in which makes me feel better knowing hes still around...

I told my manager at work and I will take some bereavement for three days and go to work Thursday... I will go to the beach tomorrow and just reflect and relax then on Monday I will help my mom with the death certificate and go to the funeral home to plan transporting his body from Philly to NJ and do cremation...

My mom wants to do something private being that all my family is either in the Phillippines or in Cali so she doesnt want them to travel all the way here just for us three... my aunt (dads sister) wanted to visit us but we told her its ok since shes out in LA and my dad passed already so she cant see him...

Right now just going to go out and get lunch at a restaurant... I just wanted to have us three together to just be supportive of the situation since its so fresh... plus my dad always liked when all of us are together... my sister lives an hour plus from me so we hardly see her...

just wanted to say thanks again NT.. I love yall foreal!!

Your dad put up a hell of a battle. It just kinda pissed me off that they could have took care of that mass before it got big. But God bless your dad and your family and I wish you guys well OP.

 

[sharpshooter718]

Stay strong

 

[you go boy]

Your dad put up a hell of a battle. It just kinda pissed me off that they could have took care of that mass before it got big. But God bless your dad and your family and I wish you guys well OP.

Yes, this was one regret we as a family have to live with... When they found out about the mass originally like over a decade ago a small surgery coulda been done to take it out... but the doctors back then made it seem like he can live with it and he did without any pain back then hence why nothing was done... now in 2023 the mass grew bigger and the damage was done and it was already too late...

this was a learning experience for all of us... if there is some health concern get it addressed asap or else something like this will happen... I just hope that my mom is straight a few years later... she smokes ciggarrettes and its impossible to get her to stop... shes not a chain smoker like a pack a day but moreso a pack a week..

 

[danikerhino]

Yes, this was one regret we as a family have to live with... When they found out about the mass originally like over a decade ago a small surgery coulda been done to take it out... but the doctors back then made it seem like he can live with it and he did without any pain back then hence why nothing was done... now in 2023 the mass grew bigger and the damage was done and it was already too late...

this was a learning experience for all of us... if there is some health concern get it addressed asap or else something like this will happen... I just hope that my mom is straight a few years later... she smokes ciggarrettes and its impossible to get her to stop... shes not a chain smoker like a pack a day but moreso a pack a week..

I'm alot more assertive with Doctors these days and try to pick the safer bet.

 

[you go boy]

We didn't have a traditional funeral just cuz all of our family is in Cali or Philippiines... so we just had my pops cremated which is what my mom wanted... so now we got my pops urn just chilling at my parents place on the mantel of the fireplace... I removed the name from the picture...

 

[unkn0wn]

unkn0wn how are you doing? I remember you have a loved one with health problem as well.

Mom has stage 4 lung adenocarcinoma with brain mets. Never smoked and otherwise healthy.

She's on a drug called tagrisso, which should extend her life a bit till her body develops resistance to it. Her cancer is incurable so I'm trying to make the most out of the time she still has left.

We didn't have a traditional funeral just cuz all of our family is in Cali or Philippiines... so we just had my pops cremated which is what my mom wanted... so now we got my pops urn just chilling at my parents place on the mantel of the fireplace... I removed the name from the picture...

RIP

 

[TURBO UNO]

unkn0wn I’m sorry to hear her illness is incurable. I hope you both enjoy every second you have together and that your family members all have peace, strength and unity afterwards. I truly admire you and you go boy courage and ability to handle this with.

 

[va757va]

Sorry to hear that unkn0wn

Your family Is in my prayers man…

 

[degenerate423]

Mom has stage 4 lung adenocarcinoma with brain mets. Never smoked and otherwise healthy.

She's on a drug called tagrisso, which should extend her life a bit till her body develops resistance to it. Her cancer is incurable so I'm trying to make the most out of the time she still has left.


RIP

Man, my heart goes out to you and your mom. If there’s anything we can do to help, let us know. Will be keeping your family in my prayers.