Official Depression thread

With everything that's been going on, depression has been effing me up. I felt I had things under control compared to my last post two months ago until I tested positive for covid pretty much 2 weeks ago. Between covid trashing my upper respiratory system and my past suicidal thoughts, I've been flirting with death a lot more often. To an extent I've been getting better but it's def parts of me that wants this to just be the end for me. I know it's selfish to want that but I haven't really felt accomplished or anything for some time. Today is my first time drinking alcohol in over 2 weeks and it's helped better than anybody I've been talking to or anything I've been doing since I tested positive.

As this poster above said, I'm tired. Covid just made me even more tired and done with everything at this point.

Can't say I can relate to the COVID, but I do have a bunch of mystery health problems doctors can't seem to figure out. I feel you on the past suicidal thoughts. I'm often looking at my life and all the bad **** happening, wondering if it's even worth getting up for anymore.

I had plans, goals, and dreams, and this year ruined all of that. I'm sure I'm not the only one who can agree with that.
 
Lately, I have some like really dark thoughts, thoughts of suicide and stuff like that, these thoughts can be crippling, but I usually snap out of it. My dog died this year, and I can say my dog was one of the few “individuals” I trusted and talked to. I really have trust issues with people & kinda just keep to myself. I know I have friends, but sometimes I just rather just be on my own. Buying stuff, playing basketball, random crushes on celebrities, and Lebron playing helps me not hate myself as much.
 
Lately, I have some like really dark thoughts, thoughts of suicide and stuff like that, these thoughts can be crippling, but I usually snap out of it. My dog died this year, and I can say my dog was one of the few “individuals” I trusted and talked to. I really have trust issues with people & kinda just keep to myself. I know I have friends, but sometimes I just rather just be on my own. Buying stuff, playing basketball, random crushes on celebrities, and Lebron playing helps me not hate myself as much.

I wouldn't take suicidal thoughts lightly. You could always reach out to a therapist or call one of those free mental health hotlines if you feel like anonymously getting some things off your chest. Sometimes just sharing your issues with someone willing to listen and venting a little bit can take some temporary weight off your shoulders.

Sorry to hear about your dog. That's tough. Almost like losing family. Been there twice.
 
Lately, I have some like really dark thoughts, thoughts of suicide and stuff like that, these thoughts can be crippling, but I usually snap out of it. My dog died this year, and I can say my dog was one of the few “individuals” I trusted and talked to. I really have trust issues with people & kinda just keep to myself. I know I have friends, but sometimes I just rather just be on my own. Buying stuff, playing basketball, random crushes on celebrities, and Lebron playing helps me not hate myself as much.
thread may help out w/ your dog's death:
 
thread may help out w/ your dog's death:
Lol I can’t lie, that’s why I really don’t talk about my dog like that. I know it could annoy people, or rub people the wrong way .
 
I wouldn't take suicidal thoughts lightly. You could always reach out to a therapist or call one of those free mental health hotlines if you feel like anonymously getting some things off your chest. Sometimes just sharing your issues with someone willing to listen and venting a little bit can take some temporary weight off your shoulders.

Sorry to hear about your dog. That's tough. Almost like losing family. Been there twice.
Thanks and sorry to hear about your dogs as well. I do think that at some point I have to she a therapist, whether I pay for it or it be free. I think an odd thing that balances me, is my irrational fears like of knives or anything sharp, and guns and some other items. Basically, things i have a fear in, helps me not wanna harm myself. Also, even amongst family & friends, people will randomly talk about their issues, and I don’t feel as bad..like I feel like my life could be way worse than it is
 
Made me laugh today. :lol:
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i can’t lie, even though I paid resell for my Kobe 5 “big stage”, i tried for the “Bruce Lee’s” even though I’d be ok in saving money, taking another L, on top of not getting the ps5, is infuriating, and demoralizing, I don’t think it’s healthy to take so many Ls. It really does make me feel like a loser. I think it’s also annoying when I see people I know succeed in them. It’s not hating, it’s just why can’t I get that luck, just want 1 win, in anything.
 
i can’t lie, even though I paid resell for my Kobe 5 “big stage”, i tried for the “Bruce Lee’s” even though I’d be ok in saving money, taking another L, on top of not getting the ps5, is infuriating, and demoralizing, I don’t think it’s healthy to take so many Ls. It really does make me feel like a loser. I think it’s also annoying when I see people I know succeed in them. It’s not hating, it’s just why can’t I get that luck, just want 1 win, in anything.


I haven’t gotten 1 win on that damn SNKRS app :lol :{. Don’t sweat it, $180 saved.
 
jcarod23 jcarod23 and everyone else....

Do you take any prescribed medication.

I dont but I've been put on this vitamin game and it has really REALLY HELPED!

Yall up on St. John's Wort.

It was actually recommended to me by a doctor but not my doctor just a family friend a few months ago.

Obviously do your own research but God my mood has changed.

It was only noticeable when i noticed a week or 2 after taking them that i just wasn't sad anymore.

This doesn't make me happy but im not sad if that makes any sense.

This is my daily cocktail. View attachment 2699049

May I also suggest a good walk around the block.

Fresh air and sunshine releases good **** for your brain.
 

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i can’t lie, even though I paid resell for my Kobe 5 “big stage”, i tried for the “Bruce Lee’s” even though I’d be ok in saving money, taking another L, on top of not getting the ps5, is infuriating, and demoralizing, I don’t think it’s healthy to take so many Ls. It really does make me feel like a loser. I think it’s also annoying when I see people I know succeed in them. It’s not hating, it’s just why can’t I get that luck, just want 1 win, in anything.
Bruh it really does have a psychological effect on you. That's why I stopped entering raffles & either missing out, or just paying the ticket on the hyped things I really wanted. I really started feeling like **** after a while.
 
Bruh it really does have a psychological effect on you. That's why I stopped entering raffles & either missing out, or just paying the ticket on the hyped things I really wanted. I really started feeling like **** after a while.
Why do you guys care about material **** though? If you did attain these goods, will it bring sustained happiness? We want things so bad and when we get them the joy fades and then it's on to something else. Endless cycle.
 
Why do you guys care about material **** though? If you did attain these goods, will it bring sustained happiness? We want things so bad and when we get them the joy fades and then it's on to something else. Endless cycle.

I was gonna comment on this but, I'm assuming for jcarod23 jcarod23 Its just another layer to something deeper.

I never know when marikomorose marikomorose is trolling or not so I usually just ignore him.
 
Why do you guys care about material **** though? If you did attain these goods, will it bring sustained happiness? We want things so bad and when we get them the joy fades and then it's on to something else. Endless cycle.
It isn't necessarily about the material aspect, at least for me. It's moreso about the reoccurring loses. I am someone who likes winning.

Example: I have never lost at Mercy or Bloody Knuckles and would likely let my fingers break b4 I quit.

The reality of me constantly losing at something especially when that "something" is something I never really had a chance at winning (the way I'm doing it) doesn't fare well w/ my psyche. So found a different way to win by not caring or paying aftermarket price.
 
Mercy :lol:

I completely forgot about that sh*t. That's when you lowkey discovered dudes you shouldn't mess with. You thought sh*t was sweet until you had all your fingers and wrists bent back at right angles.
 
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