Being THE provider

[jayhood23]

NT as a predominately male board, how do you feel about being the sole provider for your wife and kids if you so choose that path?
Do you feel as if she should get out and work just as you do, or stay home and take care of the kids, cook, clean, etc.? I mean granted its nice to have two incomes but if you are in a position to be the sole provider for the family would you still encourage her to look for work?

Me personally if I'm in a position to where I can rely on my sole income to take care of everything I wouldn't pressure my wife into getting a job as long as she takes care of home. I was raised to be very domesticated so naturally I'd help around the house with chores and not have a problem with it. I wouldn't be able to stand just sitting around the house and watch her do everything even after working an 8 or 9 hour day. That's just me though.

NT, thoughts?

 

[mytmouse76]

like you said if we can afford it i wouldn't mind but i have a fear of something like that being thrown back in my face at some point & that would make me raise all hell

of course i should trust that it wouldn't be but people say a lot of things they dont mean when they are angry and i would never want to feel i have to depend on someone to get by

 

[solefood229]

Mouse that's why I could never be a stay at home dad, she would always have the ultimate trump card in a argument and I couldn't do nothing but sit there with the screw face



Speaking of screw faces anyone got that pic of the dude standing behind mr P with the mean screwface?

 

[mytmouse76]

im a female...youre gonna get way more than a screw face from me for something like that

i never got how that was a trump card tho...if thats why the couple agrees on how can you go back and throw that in their face...

i dont believe cuz you make all or more money you get to make all the decisions either...

 

[jayhood23]

If that's whats agreed in a marriage for you to be a stay at home mom then you better believe that you being at home cooking, cleaning, taking care of MY children is a job in itself. IF you wanna go get a part time bs gig then go for it but no pressure.

No way in the world would I get mad enough to throw that in my wifes face. Stay at home dads is different though because of the male ego

 

[bboy1827]

To keep it 100 I want my wife to work, just so if we get a divorce she still has something that is her own. I would like to think that I wouldn't be that big of a **** to her, but I've seen some people do some terrible things to people in divorce situations.

If she works, brings in income and throws down on all of our shared assets, the only thing she will have to worry about when we get divorced is the children....and the coke that I put in her purse to get them -_-

Above all I don't know how this whole marriage thing would work, but I want a legit partnership and it can't be a partnership if I'm bringing in 100% of the income, eventually I will feel some type of way about it...I think.

 

[Mound Raised]

Ladies these days are soooo independent, unless you cakin major, they not quttin no jobs

 

[Gill Baka Esq. LLC.]

Personally I would want my wife to stay home and take care of the kids if i'm the one being the sole provider in the house hold.

A mothers bond with her kids is important, I would say moreso than a father for whatever reason.

But as the kids grow up I think she should have a small job on the side, just to make her not go bat ***# crazy.

 

[proper english]

i recently spent a weekend with a well-to-do family of 6.. the husband is a doctor, the wife takes care of the 4 kids.. her schedule is crazy packed.. soccer practice, swim class, photography, etc.. kids were the most polite, humble bunch ive yet to meet. 
i would do it in a heartbeat, granted family is financially stable. 

 

[rko2004]

Originally Posted by mytmouse76

im a female...youre gonna get way more than a screw face from me for something like that

i never got how that was a trump card tho...if thats why the couple agrees on how can you go back and throw that in their face...

i dont believe cuz you make all or more money you get to make all the decisions either...

That's ego. They let it go to their head and you can't tell them nothing.

 

[bboy1827]

The tone of this post makes me think if a wife works then she will be less able to take care of the kids. They aren't mutually exclusive, a women can work and still take good care of the kids, especially when the kids begin to go to school full days.

Plus, as a person who has worked with kids since age 14, the main asset is getting a break form kids. A women that works gets that break; a break n which they can still feel useful...assuming that the women isn't one of those lazy types. I see/hear/learn from parents everyday, a break that provides some type of intellectual stimulation is the best thing for the parents happiness, happy parents make good parents.

 

[solewoman]

I'd probably get bored...or tired of seeing my kids all day. Besides I need my own money.

 

[kanyewestjayz4life]

 

[throwback1718]

no you are going to be working ... have a life and goals of your own.
I never was much of a fan of staying at home mom as my wife....

nothing wrong with it as my mom was a stay at home mom for my older brother and sister. however some times she would take an accounting course or something here and there.

As far as I can remember, after my family moved to the states my mom worked or went to school at some point.

im not sure how divorces go when both partners have decent jobs and the splitting of property and finances etc.

 

[oidreez]

I would want my wife to work

 

[jayhood23]

My point is that her being a stay at home is a job in itself, it may not provide financially but its value is far more than any amount of money

 

[pr0phecy718]

Originally Posted by GrimlocK

way off topic but why do u have Mike Woods as your avy? 

random

 

[AZwildcats]

I have seen a couple of marriages deteriorate because of this issue. A friend of mine had a wife who worked, but refused to contribute to bills, mortgage etc because he was supposed to be the provider. Her money was her money, but his money was the family's money. They got a divorce after 4 yrs.

Me personally I plan on marrying a girl from back home. And the culture back home is a traditional provider/nurturer system. I support financially, she supports in other ways.

 

[proper english]

Originally Posted by AZwildcats

I have seen a couple of marriages deteriorate because of this issue. A friend of mine had a wife who worked, but refused to contribute to bills, mortgage etc because he was supposed to be the provider. Her money was her money, but his money was the family's money. They got a divorce after 4 yrs.

Me personally I plan on marrying a girl from back home. And the culture back home is a traditional provider/nurturer system. I support financially, she supports in other ways.

dude was/is an idiot for marrying such a trifling female

 

[cs02132]

My dream job is to be a stay at home dad. Of course that prob wont happen so I'd rather it be that both parents worked to support the family

 

[throwback1718]

a LOT of women have the mindset that the mans money is the family's money and her money is... HER money. I have heard way too many women that live like this or plan to live like this.

 

[nt brah]

I would like for my SO to work. With both my parents working full time it was never an issue since my grandparents lived downstairs from us. I would imagine going the same route, with my parents now in their 50's by the time I have children of my own they can play the same part and did their parents.

 

[savannah leigh]

Originally Posted by throwback1718

a LOT of women have the mindset that the mans money is the family's money and her money is... HER money. I have heard way too many women that live like this or plan to live like this.

Yeah sure you have... lots of women

 

[ooiron manoo]

Originally Posted by throwback1718

a LOT of women have the mindset that the mans money is the family's money and her money is... HER money. I have heard way too many women that live like this or plan to live like this.

, seen this way too often.  They are dead serious too,

The future wife is currently getting her Masters, so being a stay at home mom is not an option.

 

[Sir San Diego]

I used to be cool with the idea, BEFORE I had kids. But really, with kids being in school damn near the whole day, what is a woman going to do all day? I'm not with that. If a woman is sitting home all day with not much to do, hell, if anyone is sitting home all day with not much to do while the other person is working and going for theirs, it's going to cause problems eventually.

The working partner is going to expect certain things from the nonworking partner that will, at some point, not be fulfilled. Also the working partner may come to envy the nonworking partner and all their free time. Boredom also causes a lot of issues if someone is staying at home with not much to do.

I just think it's an idea that doesn't apply to the modern world. I'm not trying to basically pay someone to do things I can do myself. I can cook, I can clean, I can take care of my children. If you're not bringing in an equal slice then what do I need you for? Fapping is free.