Have You Ever Dumped a Long Term GF?

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Mar 26, 2009
Past couple days I've been getting upset over seemingly "minor" things and finally reached a boiling point this morning. Cat vomited on my fresh clothes 2nd time in a week. She's been saying she's gonna take it to a vet since like November and still keeps spending on frivolous things.

We don't live together but when I think about it, I've probably been home maybe 5 times in the past month. Feel like I'm paying rent for nothing, And she lives 12 miles away which isn't necessarily long distance, but the extra gas expense & drive-time is adding stress.

After I get off work today, I'm thinking of going to her place collecting what little I keep over there (Laptop, Tools, Laundry). She'll probably ask why I'm taking my stuff and I'll tell her we're done, I don't know what else to say, if I should preface it by saying something beforehand or what.

I feel bad, not just imagining her reaction but also cause...on paper she's 100% what I was looking for. I have dinner waiting for me everytime I get home. She randomly surprises me with gifts. She's Always down to help me on my projects, even abandoning her own plans.

Her landlord is a husband/wife couple who've invited us to dinners, they like me alot along with all the neighbors in the apartment and me leaving is probably gonna hurt them too.

But deep down I feel like if I don't leave today, I'm gonna be perpetually stuck where I'm at.

How/When/Where did you break the news?
 
are you taking responsibility of your issues ?Are you blaming the issues in your life on her? and think it will all be better when shes gone?
not saying u should marry her but just curious as to what the reason is because if you don't figure that out it might creep up in the next relationship

someone once told me, everything that happens in your life is your fault good or bad. so if ur not enjoying her then thats ur assphault mane

also need pics before voting
 
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SN to post/thread title is off DA HEEZY!




In all seriousness OP How old are you and how old is she? This would help because if you're in your 30's you just gotta chalk it up.
What's the playing field like where you live? Do you think you can do better? A good woman is getting harder andharder to come across nowadays especially if y'all are young. Millenial chicks go their heads all messed up.

Minor things can always be worked out by talking about it and keeping open communication going. It's the major deal breakers you gotta watch out for. Giving up some mnor things to accommadte your partner is part of every relationship.
 
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Sounds like you already weighed the benefits against the negatives. I would proceed with the breakup sooner rather than later especially if its affecting your mental health.
 
You think think the grass is greener somewhere else, but it probably isn't.

As someone said, you're describing an issue that seems very minor. If the cat is presenting such a problem, why don't you take it to the vet yourself? Also, you're complaining about the distance between y'all, which suggests to me that you would prefer if yall were living together...BUT you're complaining about her pet getting into your stuff? You do understand that her cat would be in your stuff more if y'all lived together, right?

Frankly, I'm not quite sure that you know exactly what you want. But what do I know... I'm just a random person on the internet.

...
 
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Before you jump off that ledge, talk it over with her. Be honest about things and how you feel about said things. Now the ball is in her court. Just up and walking away would be very emotionally immature. Instead of spending months at a time together, maybe pull it back to 3 or 4 times a week for awhile.
 
Seems like you're going through a time with other stuff. I'd go for a "break" and see how you guys are feeling in a month
 
Not gonna lie, without further context, she sounds just fine and you're coming off like a Seinfeld episode

"You're breaking up with her? But I thought things were going great between you two."
"They are but.....her cat keeps vomiting on my clothes..."
"Her cat VOMITED on your clothes?"
"Second time THIS WEEK!"
"Well what's wrong with it?"
"I don't know, she's been saying she's gonna take it to the vet since November"
"It's February"
"I KNOW!"
"Maybe you should take a look at it, you did save that whale"
"Oh suuuure, I'll just reach into its blowhole and pull out a hairball"

 
Her landlord is a husband/wife couple who've invited us to dinners, they like me alot along with all the neighbors in the apartment and me leaving is probably gonna hurt them too.
Also, this has nothing to do with anything. Its NOT your job to make EVERYONE happy.
 
If you have already checked out from the relationship mentally you should do it.

You don't get to the point of wanting to end the relationship without having a good reason.

And if you don't have a good reason you might just be nuts... and in that case you'll be doing her a favour.
 
OP you’re sounding really immature with the small amount of details you provided for your reasoning. Long term relationship and you don’t even live together? Must be 22 or 23.

there is no good advice for you bruh. Dump her. Have her level up with the next dude. Get jealous and have your regrets. Then learn your life lessons. Ain’t no playbook for this. You gotta navigate through trial and error and maybe one day you’ll be wiser.

If I had pics of your girl, it would be easy to narrow down the advice though, just saying.
 
I feel bad, not just imagining her reaction but also cause...on paper she's 100% what I was looking for. I have dinner waiting for me everytime I get home. She randomly surprises me with gifts. She's Always down to help me on my projects, even abandoning her own plans.
This is 100% what you're looking for? Out of all the things you could want in a partner, this is what came to mind initially? You have a lot of maturing to do champ, you're better off single for your own good.
 
OP hates cats so much it’s spilling over to the owner :lol: :smh:

“You Vomited on my clothes”
1675714652579.jpeg
 
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