caught some charges in feb . Statute of limitations is 365 days for a misdemeanor , if I don’t get a letter from court/call from my attorney notifying me of my arraignment within the next two months , it means they’re going after me for felonies . Don’t want to explain much more than that for now .
Graduated HS ‘07 - barely made it through university . got kicked out halfway through for truancy due to some **** I got caught up in outside of school so I went back to finish my degree last year at 28 . After finally copping that bachelors I caught the bug and planned on furthering my education so I could teach music since its the only thing keeping me sane , but I can’t manage it while working full time and trying to start a family - even if I did get into the program i wanted , I don’t think I could land a proper teaching job with my criminal record .
Engaged but can’t plan my wedding/set a date . not trying to book a venue , invite everyone and go through all that work then have court date hovering over my head/or be back in jail or prison on the day I’m supposed to get married . It’s supposed to be an exciting (albeit stressful/frustrating) process .
Been sober since my arrest , checked myself into a court approved outpatient program (mostly in hopes of showing the judge that I’m taking proactive measures to help myself) . fam says I’m an alcoholic for many reasons . After being in this program for ten months - I think I am and that’s ok . I don’t really want to drink . I’m going to stay in it until feb 15 2019 to complete exactly one year of sobriety (program has a mandatory weekly drug test along with 24/7 alcohol monitoring) . Can’t wait to smoke a joint at this point , the last 9 months were a breeze but now everything feels like it’s falling apart
Same **** you’ve probably heard a million times . Was the black sheep growing up and still am . Had to leave my apartment to pay for attorney fees and this program . Work a dead end job where I’ve hit the ceiling , feel like I’m mooching off my grandma even though I pay bills and all that . only sight of neighbors I see are shut doors and turned heads when I walk by them . Most of my friends are addicts , in prison/trouble with the law , in the neighborhood gang , or ****ing dead from any combination of the three . My little brothers the golden child and I’m proud of him . cousins are all doing good pre med or engineers , really ****en good . Auntie said and uncles always throw shade at me and I don’t give a **** - but it hurts when I see my parents having to take it cuz they can’t say **** back .
I’m tired of California . Visited my uncle in NYC and that place is alive . . but if I cant get my **** together here I can’t do it anywhere . I do seriously feel like moving the **** out of LA though .
**** sucks right now , I mean I’m happy for my fam my lady and waking up this morning but I just want self respect . . I want to feel proud I accomplished something in life and I feel like the window is closing . It didn’t even feel like Christmas yesterday .
Think I’m going to dip out from NT and the net in general until further notice . Sorry for the wall of text but I cant stand this **** anymore .
Music didn’t even sound good today and I haven’t practiced piano in a week . I won’t be posting for awhile , hopefully when I return I can feel good about life again .
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