Bruh, I dont think im ever getting married

[Chiron]

Man Y'all happily married dudes got kids. I could've just stopped after my first post in the thread. Kids change the whole game.

If I think I wanna raise a family with a chick then that's a reason right there to be married, stay married, or get married. Ain't trynna have no kids though so still staying away from the alter

 

[Mark Antony]

cot damn @thenewjs23
reminds me of this:



foh!! better off taking my life before you think you see a cot damn dime from me

This judge needs to be removed asap. She is straight flexing, her response was emotional. That's completely unacceptable.

 

[KingdomFlatbush]

This judge needs to be removed asap. She is straight flexing, her response was emotional. That's completely unacceptable.

Somebody would have had to lock me in a room for about a week. I'm talking HANDS finna get put on somebody.

 

[PRIME]

I'm sorry for your feels OP

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[mr marcus]

just realized dude said he married a chick he never screwed ....... 

 

AND she got preggo by another dude before the divorce was finalized 

 

[flyeed]

 

I'm currently with a girl who doesn't believe in divorce (I'm sure she'd make an exception for insane circumstances) and I have zero worry of ever cheating on me. Women like that still do exist. Or at least the type that you don't have to worry about cheating.

The problem is, can you be in love with a person like that? Who tends to be a bit less exciting than the type of chick who you might have to worry a tiny bit about. Obviously I'm generalizing, but I'm currently in the process of finding out if I can.

How is that a problem? Why is a chick who may end up cheating on you exciting? How can you love someone who may cheat on you, but find it hard towards someone who won't? Those sounds like internal issues you need to work on.

You got my point wrong my man.

I don't mean a girl is more exciting because she might cheat. But just imo generally, the type of girl who is exciting and will keep you on your heels is also the one who might lack the morality of the good girl who'll be faithful to you through anything.

With all due offense, that is the dumbest opinion I've heard.

So you're saying a chick who I enjoy spending time with, excites me, and keeps me motivated in life doesn't have good morals and lacks faithfulness? Not sure how that correlation occurs.

I really want to know what you're opinion is based on. What experiences did you have that shaped this opinion?

Maybe I didn't feel like explaining thoroughly so I took a shortcut and made it just about morals. But I think the excitement part is just common sense and logic.

I think that there's a correlation between a girl below your level to a girl above your level and the amount of excitement each gives you that can make you passionate about your relationship. With that being said, the more seemingly out of your league, and exciting a girl is, it's safe to assume there's a correlation with how likely she is to leave.

Not that I've ever been cheated on, but you guys are right in suggesting that I've been surrounded by a lot of ****** superficial my whole life which gives me a bit of a cynical outlook.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

just realized dude said he married a chick he never screwed .......   


AND she got preggo by another dude before the divorce was finalized 

In the name of love.

Great thread fellas

 

[Master Zik]

When I think about that specific part bruh, you should've got your marriage annulled not a divorce if you never consummated the relationship.

 

[Coromanti]

I think too many people go into marriage preparing for it to fail so they never put their all into it to start with.

I'm a firm believer in "Your thoughts become your reality." so whenever I do something I put my all into it. So even if it doesn't work out I can say I truly tried and usually there is no negative repurcussion as a result.

Also when it comes to choosing women I feel like dudes dont vet enough and they dont pay attention enough to the small things.  When she makes unnecessary snide comments, when she actively engages in double standards, the way she treats certain people either close to you or the way she treats people who provide her a service like waiters or post office workers etc.

 

[al audi]

I want to get married and do the family thing one day... But I'm skeptical as hell. If it never happens, I'll be alright. I accept that the world I live in is the furthest thing from perfect or ideal.

well said

you summed up my thoughts

 

[mangudai954]

I think too many people go into marriage preparing for it to fail so they never put their all into it to start with.

I'm a firm believer in "Your thoughts become your reality." so whenever I do something I put my all into it. So even if it doesn't work out I can say I truly tried and usually there is no negative repurcussion as a result.

Also when it comes to choosing women I feel like dudes dont vet enough and they dont pay attention enough to the small things.  When she makes unnecessary snide comments, when she actively engages in double standards, the way she treats certain people either close to you or the way she treats people who provide her a service like waiters or post office workers etc.

Great points. As men we tend to go for what we like as opposed to what's good for us.

How is one suppose to know what to look for though? Especially if they didn't have an example of it growing up?

 

[blastercombo]

Dudes need to be more picky and selfish. YES. Now what do I mean by that? I mean you need to take your time and not settle. You see a problem, tell her to kick rocks. Stand up for yourself and never change. You get with someone that can stand for that, wife that up


"That'll never happen", fine. Then it won't and you'll be just fine.

 

[fontaine]

My friends run the gamut. I have divorced friends. I have remarried friends. I have friends who run around like they're not married. One of my aces is a guy who is 52, a doc, and has never been married. He has a 9 year old with a bird but he has never been hitched. He makes a lot of money. He takes trips all over the place. He usually takes females on these trips with him. His life is a series of BS relationships. Now, he tells me he wants to get married. I have a standing bet with him that he won't. Too set in his ways. One minute he will tell me his life is fantastic. The next minute he will tell me he's lonely.

Marriage is like everything else in this world. You get out of it what you put in it.

As far as the divorce thing goes, don't worry about it. If you're a money making dude, you're going to make money. That won't stop. Anything you acquire, you can reacquire. Don't let the fear of the unknown keep you from taking the ride of your life. Could be awesome. Could be terrible. You won't know unless you get on

excellent post

 

[Sir San Diego]

View media item 1417536

A word to the wise...



Stay single my dudes. And this is coming from someone who was married once. I divorced her, not the other way around. You want your future and hard work hanging in the balance of a coin flip? You know YOU. You'll never fully know someone else. People change... lose interest... become lazy... get bored.

Peep what landed in my Facebook messenger inbox a week ago from a married woman. And sadly she isn't the first or last married woman that has hit me up recently.


This is only the beginning. It got worse.


View media item 1417545View media item 1417507View media item 1417508View media item 1417509View media item 1417510View media item 1417511View media item 1417512View media item 1417513


This female is married with two kids. She's young and her man is around my age, maybe younger. When I met her, she had the two kids, but was rolling solo so I used to beat the brakes off of her. I don't know it for a fact, but I'd bet she doesn't work and dude is taking care of her too.

Like I've said in other threads, the stories that I have heard from other females and the things that I've seen with my own eyes have made me see females in an entirely different light than some of y'all do.

I understand that my experiences are unique and individual, but I swear this **** is common. Just be careful if you do decide to tie the knot.

Btw, I turned her down. I'm good on breaking up that dude's home or helping her make a fool of him.

 

[HankHill]

Maybe I didn't feel like explaining thoroughly so I took a shortcut and made it just about morals. But I think the excitement part is just common sense and logic.

I think that there's a correlation between a girl below your level to a girl above your level and the amount of excitement each gives you that can make you passionate about your relationship. With that being said, the more seemingly out of your league, and exciting a girl is, it's safe to assume there's a correlation with how likely she is to leave.

Not that I've ever been cheated on, but you guys are right in suggesting that I've been surrounded by a lot of ****** superficial my whole life which gives me a bit of a cynical outlook.

Again, I still don't know the correlation of this. Maybe we have different definitions of what excitement is (I dont know how you're using it this context)?

This still sounds like an insecurity issue on you're part:
You don't want a girl above your level or out of your league because you feel she's more than likely to leave. I think you just have esteem issues and feel "this is to good to be true".
You settle for a chick below you and hope that you fall in love to avoid the situation.

You might want to go to the TAY thread and post what you're putting in here. I'm sure they'll offer you better advice that I can.

 

[al audi]

men lie women lie man

in this day and age with social media its just really like......out of control Brolic

the ppl with the best marriages are also best friends imo

 

[c hanna]

I'm looking forward to getting married and i cant way to have kids of my own and watch them grow

 

[fontaine]

Again, I still don't know the correlation of this. Maybe we have different definitions of what excitement is (I dont know how you're using it this context)?

This still sounds like an insecurity issue on you're part:
You don't want a girl above your level or out of your league because you feel she's more than likely to leave. I think you just have esteem issues and feel "this is to good to be true".
You settle for a chick below you and hope that you fall in love to avoid the situation.

You might want to go to the TAY thread and post what you're putting in here. I'm sure they'll offer you better advice that I can.

that is definitely some self esteem stuff...

Hell, a damb 4 doesn't want a guy that is thinking " she's too good and will leave me "

Dahell kind of opinion is that?

 

[flyeed]

Again, I still don't know the correlation of this. Maybe we have different definitions of what excitement is (I dont know how you're using it this context)?

This still sounds like an insecurity issue on you're part:
You don't want a girl above your level or out of your league because you feel she's more than likely to leave. I think you just have esteem issues and feel "this is to good to be true".
You settle for a chick below you and hope that you fall in love to avoid the situation.

You might want to go to the TAY thread and post what you're putting in here. I'm sure they'll offer you better advice that I can.

that is definitely some self esteem stuff...

Hell, a damb 4 doesn't want a guy that is thinking " she's too good and will leave me "

Dahell kind of opinion is that?

I actually have a girl who catches people off guard with how good looking she is and is intelligent, fun, and has a high moral compass, and who like i mentioned before gives me zero reason to ever worry about cheating.

But I'd be fronting if i said I don't have my insecurities. They just don't pertain to this.

Idk man, I've honestly just been trying to diagnose why I can't fall in love with the girl I'm with even though she's dope and I want to. But my contradictions make me think that I just need to give it time or that the reason is something else. Either way, don't want to derail. If i want to discuss my problems further I'll bring them to TAY.

 

[Brownstone]

My dude came to court with a bow-tie on?! Judge should have let him walk.

 

[Mark Antony]

You sound like you don't think you "deserve" her. Talking that league mess is an easy give away.

 

[flyeed]

You sound like you don't think you "deserve" her. Talking that league mess is an easy give away.

I usually value what you have to say a lot, you seem like a dude who's experienced a lot...but nah its not that. I think we're pretty equal. Actually my arrogance sometimes makes me think I might be overvaluing myself and at times take her for granted and consequently undervaluing her, leading me to think that I'm too good for her. But never do I think she's too good for me or that I don't deserve her.

I think my problem is something much deeper, but I don't want to derail the thread, and I think I'd get better feedback speaking about it in TAY.

 

[andretti]

View media item 1417536

A word to the wise...



Stay single my dudes. And this is coming from someone who was married once. I divorced her, not the other way around. You want your future and hard work hanging in the balance of a coin flip? You know YOU. You'll never fully know someone else. People change... lose interest... become lazy... get bored.

Peep what landed in my Facebook messenger inbox a week ago from a married woman. And sadly she isn't the first or last married woman that has hit me up recently.


This is only the beginning. It got worse.


View media item 1417545View media item 1417507View media item 1417508View media item 1417509View media item 1417510View media item 1417511View media item 1417512View media item 1417513


This female is married with two kids. She's young and her man is around my age, maybe younger. When I met her, she had the two kids, but was rolling solo so I used to beat the brakes off of her. I don't know it for a fact, but I'd bet she doesn't work and dude is taking care of her too.

Like I've said in other threads, the stories that I have heard from other females and the things that I've seen with my own eyes have made me see females in an entirely different light than some of y'all do.

I understand that my experiences are unique and individual, but I swear this **** is common. Just be careful if you do decide to tie the knot.

Btw, I turned her down. I'm good on breaking up that dude's home or helping her make a fool out of him.

Tell me more stories about life/women I can learn from.

 

[Sir San Diego]

Just take that example and multiply by a number. **** happens all the time my dude.

I know a female who's married and had an abortion because she got knocked up by ONE of the dudes she *****. These females are out here bad. Trust. It's the "classy" ones who drive the nice cars that some lames put on a pedestal that most would least expect too.

Don't let appearances fool you. A lot of these females are trife. That's all I got. Just be smart and don't wife someone up on looks. Put a female to the test and get a rider. I mean TEST her and see if she's about it like she says she is. I'm not saying demean or abuse her, but see if she's down for you when you don't have it or when you look like a bum that just rolled out of bed. See if her love is just as deep as your pockets or your looks. See how she is when other dudes are around. See how she is with her own fam... her friends... etc. What's her work ethic. **** like that.

And after all of that. Don't get married.

 

[slighted]

^ Most soft dudes and those exact same females would say that "testing her" is abusive and controlling.

But I agree with you +9000. Being naive is one of the worst things you can be in this world.