Im 19 and about to have my own apartment.. FML

[seasoned vet]

Originally Posted by gORJESS

Originally Posted by J Burner

How is this an L? Your 19 and your parents are willing to pay for you to live in your own apartment....

I think I would hate living alone.

- GROW UP! seriously.

- jesus christ, what is wrong with this generation afriad to get out there and live life......ALONE if need be. its just like riding a bike but you're tooscared to get on the bike to find out how easy it is......

 

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by gORJESS

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by J Burner

How is this an L? Your 19 and your parents are willing to pay for you to live in your own apartment....

b/c she's smart enough to realize that living on your own isn't the best thing in the world all the time...especially at the young age of 19.
OP. you're lucky to have parents who care about your needs and your own life

Do you have any family around you?
Do your parents have any close friends who could be a sort of surrogate family for you?

Tell your parents your concern...while they may immediately react by pulling the deal off...tell them that this should indeed show that you're being mature and thoughtful about the situation.

I am planning to tell them how I feel about it. I just dont want to put them in a position where they feel they need to choose between me or my uncle. My parents do have a few close friends that I think I would be able to go to if anything, im not too close to them but my parents are.

That's perfect then. Someone who will be able to check in on you from time to time, and make sure that you're doing ok...and/or you can turn to themwhen you really need to.
Tell them you don't want them to choose family comes 1st and you're pretty much old enough to start learning to how to take care of yourself...andreally.. you'll be doing them a favor too, by living there and keeping the apt, until they return to the area.

ps. you're 19.. do NOT move in with your boyfriend...not from a morality perspective...but from a relationship and personal growth one.

 

[gorjess]

Originally Posted by Nike Star Jay

what's up with females always being scarred to live alone? i have to sister, 26 & 28, both of them are scarred to live alone.

look at it this way, if you decide not to live on your own, and stay with your parents, you're gonna be stuck. you'll have a hard time moving out in the future. you have a fear of living alone, and unless you face this fear, you're either a)gonna live at home forever or b)wait for some guy to let you live with him. to be blunt, just grow up and handle your business. you said you have plans, so handle them. stay in queens, you've lived there your whole life anyway, and just do your thing. if my parents were willing to pay for my apartment, do you think i'd be wondering whether it's a good idea or not?

lol I dont know what it is. If I know im coming home and lets say no one is there I will just walk through the crib to make sure nothings out ofplace or nothings weird - no robbers hiding behind the door cause they heard me put the key in. I dont know if im just paranoid or what. I joke and say mydoors gonna look like this if i live alone :

 

[androoow]

tell your boyfriend to move in with you. simple.

 

[alleniversonfan01]

It may be a joke but if thats what you gotta do to feel safe then thats what you gotta do. !+!@ what anyone says when they come to the crib and you gottaunlock 3 deadbolts. My girls aunt has a couple extra slide locks on her door, and she live in the Bronx. So do what you gotta do to feel safe.

But seriously you dont have any friends who would want to move in with you. I understand where you comin from with no starngers because the only reason peopledo that +!+# is for the rent. And since thats not the problem for you having a stanger as a roommate isnt an option. But you dont got one friend who would wantto move in for a couple hundred a month. Then when its time for you to take over the rent split that +!+# down the middle.

 

[Master Zik]

Given the situation this is not a bad option for you. Ask your bf to move in with you or a cousin or someone you're really good friends with.

If that doesn't work I can be your Kramer.

 

[gorjess]

Originally Posted by ANDROOOW

tell your boyfriend to move in with you. simple.

He lives in NJ and goes to school there. He thinks that it will be too far of a commute to go to and from school.

 

[j dilla himself]

OP got a funny avy, though. You look 6 in that picture

 

[stacksblowinpurp]

youll get use 2 living alone and coming to an empty house but if not ask a friend 2 move in and kick in sum rent

 

[mangudai954]

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by gORJESS

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by J Burner

How is this an L? Your 19 and your parents are willing to pay for you to live in your own apartment....

b/c she's smart enough to realize that living on your own isn't the best thing in the world all the time...especially at the young age of 19.
OP. you're lucky to have parents who care about your needs and your own life

Do you have any family around you?
Do your parents have any close friends who could be a sort of surrogate family for you?

Tell your parents your concern...while they may immediately react by pulling the deal off...tell them that this should indeed show that you're being mature and thoughtful about the situation.

I am planning to tell them how I feel about it. I just dont want to put them in a position where they feel they need to choose between me or my uncle. My parents do have a few close friends that I think I would be able to go to if anything, im not too close to them but my parents are.

That's perfect then. Someone who will be able to check in on you from time to time, and make sure that you're doing ok...and/or you can turn to them when you really need to.
Tell them you don't want them to choose family comes 1st and you're pretty much old enough to start learning to how to take care of yourself...and really.. you'll be doing them a favor too, by living there and keeping the apt, until they return to the area.

ps. you're 19.. do NOT move in with your boyfriend...not from a morality perspective...but from a relationship and personal growth one.

Good point.

 

[gorjess]

Originally Posted by Master Zik

Given the situation this is not a bad option for you. Ask your bf to move in with you or a cousin or someone you're really good friends with.

If that doesn't work I can be your Kramer.

 

[gorjess]

Originally Posted by J Dilla Himself

OP got a funny avy, though. You look 6 in that picture

Good. Using that time scale then I should look 26 when im 40.

 

[18th letter]

Originally Posted by RavageBX

You don't want to live alone and you don't want a roommate. So basically you'd like to hide under your parents a little longer? Sorry, but it sounds like it's time to grow up.

This.

 

[pr0phecy718]

then just get a responsible friend to live with you if you're so worried about living with yourself

 

[nawth21]

Living on your own is awesome. Especially if they're still taking care of the bills. You'll get used to it with a quickness and you'll be sofreaking busy with Uni anyways. It's not like you're going to be sitting by yourself with 10 cats knitting booties or anything. Maybe it's theloner in me, but living alone doesn't sound bad at all.

 

[j dilla himself]

Look at dirty dictating the OP's life and telling her what to do and not to do..do you know how the relationship between her and her bf is like? Who areyou to determine anything. Dirty playing god with a meager resume. I personally think the op is being introduced to new responsibilities and is worried aboutthe sudden change

 

[p0tat0 5alad]

Originally Posted by J Dilla Himself

Look at dirty dictating the OP's life and telling her what to do and not to do..do you know how the relationship between her and her bf is like? Who are you to determine anything. Dirty playing god with a meager resume. I personally think the op is being introduced to new responsibilities and is worried about the sudden change

Dirty is just giving a different perspective from the average, everyday NTer. Its up to OP to choose what she is going to do and whose advice sheis gonna take (if any). All sides are spitting out equally informative opinions, so just chill out

 

[SUSHI AND GRITS]

I would stay. You can always invite people to come over if you feel that uncomfortable living by yourself.

 

[j0rdan23dunker]

damn. all expenses paid? and given the option to stay or move with them?

shoot. i'd stay.

your boyfriend of 3 years would probably move in with you and probably capitalize on that deal as well. but, charge him rent so you can keep the extra cash.LOL.

 

[thebachellor]

I don't understand why your parents can't just fly him over to NY to take care of him. So basically 3 people are going to relocate and find new jobs orschools and leave all their relationships instead of 1 person doing so?

 

[j burner]

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by J Burner

How is this an L? Your 19 and your parents are willing to pay for you to live in your own apartment....

b/c she's smart enough to realize that living on your own isn't the best thing in the world all the time...especially at the young age of 19.

So....what scenario would be better than living on your own rent free at 19? Unless you consider acutally having to do things for yourselfunacceptable, in which case living with your parents forever is the best option for you. Otherwise, I don't see how there is an option that is better thanbeing 19, out of HS and not yet in college, with a place of your own, for FREE. But oh yea, she's so young, only 19...how do those darn college kids doit? Can you imagine, moving away from your parents and being responsible for yourself, and at the same time going to school. My God, who wouldsubject these grown people to such horror?

 

[gorjess]

Originally Posted by AllenIversonFan01

It may be a joke but if thats what you gotta do to feel safe then thats what you gotta do. !+!@ what anyone says when they come to the crib and you gotta unlock 3 deadbolts. My girls aunt has a couple extra slide locks on her door, and she live in the Bronx. So do what you gotta do to feel safe.

But seriously you dont have any friends who would want to move in with you. I understand where you comin from with no starngers because the only reason people do that +!+# is for the rent. And since thats not the problem for you having a stanger as a roommate isnt an option. But you dont got one friend who would want to move in for a couple hundred a month. Then when its time for you to take over the rent split that +!+# down the middle.

Yeah I think im gonna have to upgrade my security system, get like a big dog lol. Notfor nothing my building is pretty live - there are people in and out all night so it's not like if something happened no one would notice. I guess justknowing there's no one there with me god forbid something goes down.

 

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by J Dilla Himself

Look at dirty dictating the OP's life and telling her what to do and not to do..do you know how the relationship between her and her bf is like? Who are you to determine anything. Dirty playing god with a meager resume. I personally think the op is being introduced to new responsibilities and is worried about the sudden change

right......b/c your reply is quite insightful and useful for the OP.

OP got a funny avy, though. You look 6 in that picture
and if my "resume" is meager... that must mean yours is non-existent...

 

[gorjess]

Originally Posted by TheBachellor

I don't understand why your parents can't just fly him over to NY to take care of him. So basically 3 people are going to relocate and find new jobs or schools and leave all their relationships instead of 1 person doing so?

Well our apartment is too small for him to live there. He is in a wheel chair now & is going to start to loose all muscle powerwithin the next 6 months - (basically everything in his body will shut down on him besides his brain) Our apartment building does not even have an elevator.Plus he wants to stay where he is and I guess my parents don't want to relocate him and make him unhappy in his last months.

 

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by J Burner

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by J Burner

How is this an L? Your 19 and your parents are willing to pay for you to live in your own apartment....

b/c she's smart enough to realize that living on your own isn't the best thing in the world all the time...especially at the young age of 19.

So....what scenario would be better than living on your own rent free at 19? Unless you consider acutally having to do things for yourself unacceptable, in which case living with your parents forever is the best option for you. Otherwise, I don't see how there is an option that is better than being 19, out of HS and not yet in college, with a place of your own, for FREE. But oh yea, she's so young, only 19...how do those darn college kids do it? Can you imagine, moving away from your parents and being responsible for yourself, and at the same time going to school. My God, who would subject these grown people to such horror?

b/c she's NOT going to be living rent free forever....
she stated that her parents would support her until she could take over the payments...

they said they will take care of all expenses until I can do so on my own or I can move with them to Colorado
so save the sarcasm..
and the OP did not even state if she was in college or not... that factors into the financial situation

so yes...she can buck up.... but nothing wrong with being apprehensive about the situation.