Spanking Children? Right or Wrong?

[jking0821]

I never got beat as a child. I will never beat my children (beat or spank whatever term you like my parents never laid a hand on me and I will do the same for my kids)

I don't want them ever to think that violence is the answer to any of their problems.  I want them to think about a situation and find a better solution. 

 

[rocman23]

Originally Posted by ncmalko1

rocman23... you need to take more classes on child brain development. Kids brains at young ages cant comprehend that a negative consequence comes from a bad action. The only thing a young brain interprets is "Sometimes Dad gets mad and he hits me". This is fact. Its just one of those old stone age parenting techniques that are completely wrong. Not every kid who gets beat turns out bad but I read a case study in college where they interviewed 100 and something adult men on death row and the one thing they all shared in common was they were spanked as a child. Scary!

http://www.stopspanking.com/
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/6/t062100.asp
http://www.theattachedpar...-spanking-does-not-work/
http://health.usnews.com/...ork-for-parents-and-kids
http://www.cbs19.tv/Global/story.asp?S=12532756
http://www.opposingviews....sn-t-work-and-is-harmful
http://theparentingdoctor...ng-doesnt-work-it-hurts/



Tell me when to stop. I can post 1000's

I'm sorry I thought you said you had research, these are all opinion based and surveys of online doctors. Please provide some scholarly articles from APA accredited sources. I will agree with you that some kids at an extremely young age lets say younger than 5, may not understand the I did something wrong and believe hat mom/dad is just angry. But more kids than you think will associate choices with not wanted to get spanked again. Once again I stole from the store when I was 3, my mom beat me. From that day on, at 3 years old, I associated stealing with getting spanked. I didn't want to get spanked again so I didn't steal from stores.

Also just asking guys on death row whether or not spanked isn't a legit argument to me. There are other factors that play into people ending up on death row such as overall parenting, community, psychological development. I mean sociopaths and serial killers are often said to lack neurotransmitters that are responsible for apathy sympathy and compassion. If someone lacks these emotions it doesn't matter whether you beat them or not, they just don't care. A lot of hard criminals just lack those emotions and I don't see the connection to spanking.

With that said do I believe that every child needs to be beat for every mistake they make, absolutely not. And I do not believe that spanking should be the go to form of discipline. I'm sure a lot of those guys on death row got abused instead of being spanked, and it probably happened frequently. 

 

[rocman23]

Originally Posted by ncmalko1

rocman23... you need to take more classes on child brain development. Kids brains at young ages cant comprehend that a negative consequence comes from a bad action. The only thing a young brain interprets is "Sometimes Dad gets mad and he hits me". This is fact. Its just one of those old stone age parenting techniques that are completely wrong. Not every kid who gets beat turns out bad but I read a case study in college where they interviewed 100 and something adult men on death row and the one thing they all shared in common was they were spanked as a child. Scary!

http://www.stopspanking.com/
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/6/t062100.asp
http://www.theattachedpar...-spanking-does-not-work/
http://health.usnews.com/...ork-for-parents-and-kids
http://www.cbs19.tv/Global/story.asp?S=12532756
http://www.opposingviews....sn-t-work-and-is-harmful
http://theparentingdoctor...ng-doesnt-work-it-hurts/



Tell me when to stop. I can post 1000's

I'm sorry I thought you said you had research, these are all opinion based and surveys of online doctors. Please provide some scholarly articles from APA accredited sources. I will agree with you that some kids at an extremely young age lets say younger than 5, may not understand the I did something wrong and believe hat mom/dad is just angry. But more kids than you think will associate choices with not wanted to get spanked again. Once again I stole from the store when I was 3, my mom beat me. From that day on, at 3 years old, I associated stealing with getting spanked. I didn't want to get spanked again so I didn't steal from stores.

Also just asking guys on death row whether or not spanked isn't a legit argument to me. There are other factors that play into people ending up on death row such as overall parenting, community, psychological development. I mean sociopaths and serial killers are often said to lack neurotransmitters that are responsible for apathy sympathy and compassion. If someone lacks these emotions it doesn't matter whether you beat them or not, they just don't care. A lot of hard criminals just lack those emotions and I don't see the connection to spanking.

With that said do I believe that every child needs to be beat for every mistake they make, absolutely not. And I do not believe that spanking should be the go to form of discipline. I'm sure a lot of those guys on death row got abused instead of being spanked, and it probably happened frequently. 

 

[sevit86]

Originally Posted by BK201

Originally Posted by sevit86

Originally Posted by BK201

sevit86 wrote:

and for all you white suburban spoiled brats out their, try going to a school in a 3rd world country or in asian countries.

teachers beat you way worse then your parents.

there's a reason why asians are taking over. Ethnic cultures in general are way better for physical and mental discipline.

white suburban kids in general are a bunch of puies imo grow some huevos.

Why are you bragging about this?

its not bragging, just my experience when talking to other people about their childhood.
the fact that u consider it bragging makes me question u sir

I went to preschhol in Nigeria and got hit with rulers by teachers. I just think it's pretty silly to act as if those things are good. I took it as bragging with your "asians are takin over" remark.
i went through similiar experiences with teachers in Korea. my bad for generalizing.
i just dont understand the physical disciplinary views in modern culture in america. guess i was ranting a little

 

[sevit86]

Originally Posted by BK201

Originally Posted by sevit86

Originally Posted by BK201

sevit86 wrote:

and for all you white suburban spoiled brats out their, try going to a school in a 3rd world country or in asian countries.

teachers beat you way worse then your parents.

there's a reason why asians are taking over. Ethnic cultures in general are way better for physical and mental discipline.

white suburban kids in general are a bunch of puies imo grow some huevos.

Why are you bragging about this?

its not bragging, just my experience when talking to other people about their childhood.
the fact that u consider it bragging makes me question u sir

I went to preschhol in Nigeria and got hit with rulers by teachers. I just think it's pretty silly to act as if those things are good. I took it as bragging with your "asians are takin over" remark.
i went through similiar experiences with teachers in Korea. my bad for generalizing.
i just dont understand the physical disciplinary views in modern culture in america. guess i was ranting a little

 

[nocomment6]

Originally Posted by Joe Billionaire

some kids need a spanking...

yep.

 

[nocomment6]

Originally Posted by Joe Billionaire

some kids need a spanking...

yep.

 

[nealraj006]

Just curious, at what point does spanking become useless? I remember talking with my cousin about how if one of my neighbors was to get spanked, he could definitely take his dad in a fight if it came to it. What age/time period is enough?

 

[nealraj006]

Just curious, at what point does spanking become useless? I remember talking with my cousin about how if one of my neighbors was to get spanked, he could definitely take his dad in a fight if it came to it. What age/time period is enough?

 

[toothrowed318]

as stated above some kids need it in they life. I would only spank my kids if they actually know that they are doing wrong. That way they know what time it is when I get word. But if I can truly sense that they dont understand what they are doing then I would tell them a better way. but if they go back on that then its %@+ whoopin time

 

[toothrowed318]

as stated above some kids need it in they life. I would only spank my kids if they actually know that they are doing wrong. That way they know what time it is when I get word. But if I can truly sense that they dont understand what they are doing then I would tell them a better way. but if they go back on that then its %@+ whoopin time

 

[ncmalko1]

Rocman23... Here are more legitimate threads then MD opinions....

http://childrenshospitalb...tal-effects-on-children/ (Duke University)

http://articles.cnn.com/2...h-scientist?_s=PM:HEALTH (Read the opening about children)

Its been proven beyond a doubt that spanking does damage and teaches children NOTHING. Its the fact that its too emotionally hard for people to accept.

 

[ncmalko1]

Rocman23... Here are more legitimate threads then MD opinions....

http://childrenshospitalb...tal-effects-on-children/ (Duke University)

http://articles.cnn.com/2...h-scientist?_s=PM:HEALTH (Read the opening about children)

Its been proven beyond a doubt that spanking does damage and teaches children NOTHING. Its the fact that its too emotionally hard for people to accept.

 

[mustbefire]

I didn't really get spanked as a kid but I most certainly got hit by my mom and I never really saw anything wrong with that. My dad on the other hand would pull some psychological %$$ with me telling me to wait in the corner and I believe this was effective but also traumatizing, I was really afraid of my dad as a child and even had some strong hatred towards him during my adolescence but now were straight.

I don't think its wrong to hit your child but I believe it should only be a last resort for the "hard headed" and verbal explanation is necessary because a beating without an explanation is ignorance at its finest.

 

[mustbefire]

I didn't really get spanked as a kid but I most certainly got hit by my mom and I never really saw anything wrong with that. My dad on the other hand would pull some psychological %$$ with me telling me to wait in the corner and I believe this was effective but also traumatizing, I was really afraid of my dad as a child and even had some strong hatred towards him during my adolescence but now were straight.

I don't think its wrong to hit your child but I believe it should only be a last resort for the "hard headed" and verbal explanation is necessary because a beating without an explanation is ignorance at its finest.

 

[sneakerreaper]

Spanking is useless.  I got hit with everything as a child including mouth washed out with soap.  Didn't stop anything.  You guys are right that it does teach the kid: "If I do this, then I get spanked"

But you guys are leaving out the part where the child starts to think to himself: "How can I still do this without them finding out so I don't get spanked. "

Another reason spanking is useless is as the child gets older, the spanking has to become increasingly more violent.  If you look back on your own life you will see that you parents stopped the beatings when they realized they couldn't hurt you anymore.  Until that realization they will become more and more violent.  Because people don't stop making mistakes as a kid.  People screw up throughout their lives.  Not necessary IMO

 

[sneakerreaper]

Spanking is useless.  I got hit with everything as a child including mouth washed out with soap.  Didn't stop anything.  You guys are right that it does teach the kid: "If I do this, then I get spanked"

But you guys are leaving out the part where the child starts to think to himself: "How can I still do this without them finding out so I don't get spanked. "

Another reason spanking is useless is as the child gets older, the spanking has to become increasingly more violent.  If you look back on your own life you will see that you parents stopped the beatings when they realized they couldn't hurt you anymore.  Until that realization they will become more and more violent.  Because people don't stop making mistakes as a kid.  People screw up throughout their lives.  Not necessary IMO

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Solid read

How about sparing the kid and not using the rod? https://theundefeated.com/features/how-about-sparing-the-kid-and-not-using-the-rod/

 

[iamdef]

There's no end all way to make a child behave the way you want them, you have to find what works.

some kids respond well to punishment, some to corporal punishment, and some time out. Find what works but I'd say make sure that whatever it is that child understands why they're being punished

 

[datznasty]

There is enough studies out there linking corporal punishment to ******ing the development of grey matter in their brains. I am not for it, I don't even like people screaming and cussing at their kids. Mine is 17 months and her mom and her mom's mom already on that bull ****. I never even really had to raise my voice at her

 

[iamdef]

We clash at times with how we raise our kids too. My wife likes to explain, often over explain, things to our son and I prefer the old fashioned "don't worry about why" way.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

 

[jape]

What's the alternative punishment that would stop her behavior from happening in the future?

 

[aepps20]

 

[Belgium]

Violence just seems like an easy way out, fear isn’t a good learning device. Pretty sure it can also be harmful for young children’s mental development.

I think a more appropriate punishment is to confiscate toys/devices and/or ground them.
As a kid I would’ve rather taken a beating every time instead of being locked in my room with absolutely nothing to do.

If my mom wasn’t around and I was misbehaving, my dad always wanted to beat me or terrorize me by loading his shotgun and threatening to shoot my cat but to me that was the easy way out. The relentless boredom of my mom’s punishments was much more disencouraging.